Erin Locked Out Naked

It's hard work finding a good place to stash a key. I sigh, running my fingers through my scalp as the cool, brisk wind makes a mess of my hair. This far out in the wilderness, surrounded by tall, slender birch trees with naked, spindly branches every which way, ankle-deep in golden leaves, I could hide it pretty much anywhere--which is part of the problem if I'm going to retrieve it. No matter where I turn my head, the landscape is identical, tree after tree after tree blending into one another like the average Bob Ross painting. If I left my key here, it may as well become pirate's treasure for all the help it would give me. Nobody would ever find it. Including yours truly.

I bite my lip. I can still chicken out, if I really want to. I haven't locked myself out just yet.

Aimlessly, I walk along a well-trodden desire path through the trees, chancing upon a fallen, hollowed-out birch tree before I circle all the way back to the road. I raise an eyebrow. I'm skeptical, but it's as good a location as any. I squat down, scooping out fresh earth and crumbled leaves from the hole until there's just enough room for my key to lie flat on the ground. Not too obvious. But not too hidden, either. Perfect. The wind might disturb the fallen leaves around the log and blanket it, but as long as I can retrace my steps, I should be fine, even in the dead of night with only moonlight to guide me. Right?

I roll my eyes far back in my head. I am way too confident sometimes.

I scurry away to the road and jump in my car before my nerves are fried, then drive, drive, drive with my uneasy heart beating against my chest like a drum until I'm right where I started--home. I get out and climb the front steps, twisting my neck this way and that, making sure the coast is totally, completely, 100% clear by the time I'm on the porch. At this hour, of course nobody is around except for the occasional cricket, but still... I want to be prepared for anything.

I place a hand on my chest and work on my breathing. Breathing in, then breathing out... Breathing in, then breathing out. The wind picks up, toying with the hem of my sundress as if daring me to get on with it. As if to tease me further, a burst of air rushes up to caress my inner thighs, reminding me of what it'll be like once it can touch all of me. Mother Nature is incessant in this regard. It doesn't matter how hard or how carefully I hold my skirt in place: the wind tousles it around anyway.

A better time than any to finally get rid of my outfit for good.

The house, as you might have figured out by now, is locked shut. There's no way for me to get in short of throwing a brick into one of the windows. The keys to the front door are tucked safe inside, along with my wallet and other personal effects, in the nightstand by my bed on the second floor--in other words, all but impossible for me to get to. And the spare? The spare key I usually leave under the welcome mat I'm standing on right now? Yeah, I don't think I need to put two and two together there.

That is to say that I'm stuck outside until I come back for it. In any other circumstance, this would be more of a nuisance than anything else, a waste of an hour of my time and a few miles' worth of gas. But not tonight. Because tonight, I have a dare in mind I've wanted to plan out and attempt for weeks now. A stupid, utterly reckless challenge that no sane person right in the head would ever think to try--unless, of course, they were an exhibitionist like me.

The dare? Lock myself out, leave a key in the middle of nowhere, then try and go back for it--naked.

One hundred percent bare.

... Yeah, it's definitely something. But I've already made it this far, and the last thing I'm going to do is let myself back down now.

The house isn't entirely closed up. Before I left, I opened one window a smidgen, big enough to slip something into the living room, but not so big that I can worm my way through. In a pinch I could probably open it further if I can't find the spare key, but for now I'll leave it just as it is in the spirit of the dare. One last time, I scan my environs for any sign of life, squinting my eyes to better look in the darkness. Like before, I come up empty. A small perk from living out in the countryside, I suppose.

I'm dawdling. I realize that now as I catch myself waiting for some sign to push me to do it, a green light at a four-way street, a gun to fire at the starting line--something, anything. When really the only thing stopping me is... well, me. Nothing's stopping me, not really. And why should it?

After all, it's not like there's anyone else around.

In one quick, confident motion, I pull my sundress up and over my shoulders and stuff it through the window before I have a chance to think, then follow it with my bra, panties, sandals--everything except for my smile. My outfit collapses in a misshapen pile on the carpet floor on the other side, now easily out of my reach. Even if I try really hard to reach down through the window to grab it (and risk dislocating my shoulder), I can't get to them. It's official. I'm locked out. Naked.

So, so naked.

It's not until I sneak back to my car and start the engine that I feel just how exposed I really am. The cold leather sticking to my bare skin, the gas pedal brushing against the sole of my foot, the air all over me coming in through the open windows, kissing every inch of me it can reach--each sensation is new, alien, startling, dotting my entire body with goosebumps. Absentmindedly, I rest my hand on my leg and gently glide my fingertips up and down my inner thigh. Clothes usually get in the way here, preventing this kind of slow, tactile touch, but without them...

Ugh, I'm a mess, and I haven't even left my driveway yet. I shake my head to clear my thoughts, then get on the road before I burn any more time. It was late enough as it is when I left my house the first time to store my spare key deep in the woods, and now so much of the night is gone that I can just faintly make out a hint of gold in the horizon. I better get a move on. A little something tells me I don't want to be running around naked searching for a key in broad daylight.

I drive, holding my breath each time headlights appear in the distance and a vehicle darts past me. Can they peek into the interior of my car? No shot. It's too dark, and even if they could, all they'd be able to get a glimpse of is some bare shoulder. At most, given the hour, I'd look pretty underdressed.

If only they could tell just how underdressed...

My heart's pounding. The steering wheel is slick with sweat even with the windows rolled down. As much as I try to focus on the road ahead, keep my hands firm on ten and two, all I can think about is just how far I am from my clothes. The fact that I'm driving away from my wardrobe doesn't sneak past me. Somehow, that makes my exposure even more intense. This stupid dare has me feeling more naked than I ever thought possible. My thighs shiver--and not because they're cold.

The same general area that I parked my car the first time around comes up fast. I breathe in deeply again, hoping that'll settle my nerves somewhat, as I slow down and kill the engine on the side of the road. Now here's the hard part, abandoning my only source of protection I have left for my modesty: my car.

I can't believe this is actually happening, I think as my soft sole hits the hard, cracked asphalt. You're so naked, Erin! You're so, so, so naked!

No more time to think: just as I close the driver side door, another pair of headlamps come and light up the road. My eyes open wide, and I freeze up, like a deer stopped right in its path. Crap!

I scurry into the trees like a mouse, ducking behind the first shrub I can find as my heart thunders. I hold my hand close to my chest and sigh, incidentally rubbing my hard nipple over my arm. The sensation is frustrating as it is tantalizing. It doesn't matter how I move: without an outfit to act as a barrier from touch, I can't help but be reminded, again and again, of my nudity.

My hand drifts between my legs, and it takes all the willpower I have to pull it away. I can't. Not here. Not yet. Not while I'm so distracted that I can hardly think straight...

When I'm confident the driver is far, far away, I dash back to my car and lock it shut, then jump back into the bushes with my keys in hand. It'll be a little bit awkward carrying it along for the rest of this adventure--but I'd rather that than risk having my vehicle hijacked right before I'll need it. Because after all, even when I recover the spare, I'm not done. I still have to head home.

I wipe the nervous sweat off my forehead, drape my hair over my breasts (as if that does me any good...), then retrace my steps through the tall, leafless birches. All the while my subconscious yells at me, eager to say the obvious as if I could've possibly forgotten. You're so naked! Oh my God, you're so naked, you'resonaked you'resoNAKED!

Thankfully, the woods are deserted, so much so that I don't mind my thoughts keeping me company, distracting as they are. I follow the desire path the same way I left it, crunching dead leaves under my toes as my breasts sway with every step. Not like it helps me to reserve one arm to hold them in place. Before I know it, I stumble across the old fallen log, right where I left it. Good thing I didn't explore so far into the woods that I risked wandering around in circles.

I breathe in deeply, expecting the worst. I close my eyes as if I sense a jump scare coming up in a horror movie. There's no use stalling; I don't have the time for that. Without further ado, I reach down to the ground and rummage for the key, and--

--the icy metal clinks against my nail, no worse for wear. Good. Oh, good.

The adrenaline high from my victory, however small, has me practically streaking back to my car, I'm so happy. Emboldened, I dash from tree to tree as fast as I can, bring my arms out wide as if nothing can stop me. My inner thighs clap together from the obscene movement, another sensation rare with clothes on. I don't want it to end, this feeling, this rush.

It makes me want to run forever.

Unfortunately the desire path only stretches so far. Still, there are worse things. Carrying with me only a giddy smile on my face and two sets of keys in my grasp, I step back onto the asphalt, get into my car, and kick the engine to life, driving away ultimately undetected in my excursion. I'm giggling like an idiot all the way on the journey home. I almost want to scream at the top of my lungs, as if to beg for someone to catch me before it's too late. But alas, it's not meant to be. I'm already part way home. This little naked exhibitionist here got off scot-free. In the end, the dare was just too easy!

My defenses are dropped by the time I climb the front steps and go to unlock the door. I turn the spare key in the lock, but find none of the resistance you'd expect from the locking mechanism. It's been unlocked all this time. I blink. My heart, for the first time tonight, stops.

The door swings open, knocking me back a step as a familiar pair of eyes drinks me in. A surge of super hot blood fills my cheeks and turns me redder than a tomato. Though the reflex is there, I don't bother covering up. What's the use?

It's not like my girlfriend hasn't seen everything by now.

Bless her heart, she holds back her laughter for the time being. "Erin," she says with a disbelieving grin.

"... Maddie," I say. I smile innocently enough.

Slowly, she scans me from the neck down, making sure not to miss a single inch of bare skin before getting to my toes. "You should come inside," she says, arms crossed, voice deadpan as ever. "You know, before my girlfriend catches a cold."

I bite my lip. "... Probably a good idea."

Beat. I scratch my back to keep my hands busy as I take the walk of shame inside, brushing past Maddie's side. "I'm sorry," I say when I can't bear her mischievous silence. "Did I wake you? I thought you'd be fast asleep."

Her laughter finally escapes her. "I heard you take the car. It's not exactly quiet at three in the morning."

"Oh. Right."

I glance into the living room and discover my pile of clothes resting on Maddie's ottoman. I turn to her, but try as I might, no words at all leave my mouth with my jaw hanging so close to the floor. Failing that, I instead pick up my outfit and hold it to my chest.

What does it say about me that even now, I don't want to put it on?

"I'll, uh, put these in the hamper," I say quietly. "... I'll see you in bed in a few minutes?"

Maddie smiles softly and comes up to peck my cheek. "I'd like that. Just don't forget to put something on before you get your bare butt on our clean sheets, yeah?"

I blush even harder. She says it as if I need to be reminded to wear clothes... Honestly, maybe I do.

I squeeze her hand and return her kiss with one of my own. "I'll see you in a few minutes, then. Thank you, Maddie. I'll tell you all about it tomorrow."

She laughs. "Oh, you better. Love you, you adorable thing."

I smile faintly. "Love you, too."

With that, Maddie heads down the hallway, a proud smirk on her face as she closes the bedroom door behind her. I deflate like a popped balloon the moment I'm out of eyeshot. She's definitely going to tease me about this later. So much for not getting caught, huh?

I turn back, shut the front door, and lean my weight against it and droop down as I let out a long, heavy sigh. Despite everything, I'm grinning when my butt hits the floor. I crane my neck up and stare blankly at the ceiling, utterly in awe. What a night... I think. Your girlfriend knows you're an exhibitionist now. What's that going to be like?

My smile grows until I'm outright beaming, my hand returning to the warm, slick wet spot between my legs it's been hoping to touch all this time. I don't pull it away. Finally, I give in. Oh, I have no idea, I answer my inner thoughts as pleasure twitches my thighs. But something tells me this won't be the last dare I attempt. Oh, no way. Not by a long shot...