Faternal Twins with Benefits

All sexual participants are 18+. No person, living or dead, is present in this fictional story.

I didn't hate my twin sister. I didn't love my twin sister. Once we turned 18 I just fucked her.

I'm Nathan French and my twin sister is Francis French. Of course, we're known as Nate and Fran. We are 22 years old as of this writing, just graduating from college.

We had an older sister, Caroline, who developed osteosarcoma in her leg when she was 13 and we were ten. It was a painful three years for the family until she lost the battle. For those three years, Fran and I were as close as twins could ever be. When Caroline passed away, we were stricken and even closer.

Even as young as we were, a lot of things died with us in addition to Caroline. We lost faith in our parents, who we believed didn't do enough to keep her alive. Of course, we were totally wrong. Doctor and hospitals - obviously. We never regained any trust in them. God: We felt as abandoned as the Jews in the boxcars to Auschwitz. Maybe we're wrong, but we lost faith forever.

That left only us. The amount of tears we spilled on each other's shoulders would fill a bathtub. Being young, it didn't take very long to start recovering. We had been close before, but now we were inseparable. Maybe that's when we fine-tuned the twinness. We could easily know what the other was thinking, finishing sentences for each other.

That ability came with a cost. We lost the ability to love. That included each other. Oh, we felt great affection towards each other and some for our parents, but never that I'll-give-my-life-for-you type. From the time we were 13, we existed in a world that never included the mountains and valleys of love.

By the time we got to high school we were set in our emotional world. In our physical world, I was exactly six feet tall and a skinny 145 pounds. Dark hair and readily tanned skin. My rather large ears knocked me out of the running for handsome. Dark brown eyes and a scar on my forehead (falling out of a tree) pretty much described me. Close to ordinary, I wouldn't stick out from the herd. I was very good academically and not-so-good athletically. Never the last one chosen, but never the first.

Fran was a female version of me. She, too, was six feet tall and only 10 pounds lighter. Small tits and ass. Dark hair, brown eyes. Her ears were normal and until you saw her smile, she would also be one of the herd. But her smile! Never had I seen such a transformation from ordinary to extraordinary as when she smiled. Not just her lips, but her eyes and whole body participated in it.

Guess I was wrong on one thing. I loved her smile and would do almost anything to see it. Alas, it wasn't unsheathed as much as I'd liked it to be.

Fran was at the same level academically as I was. She, however, was also a good runner and was on the track team. I took in every meet. Don't remember the parents ever being there.

My interest was in rocks. I was an avid collector and filled my room to overflowing with what I found and could afford to buy. Fran shook her head, but she helped me when we had a chance to collect. There was never a doubt about my career path.

We rarely dated all through high school. Neither of us was shy nor did we have difficulties in dealing with the opposite sex. We just didn't feel like it. Now, of course, hormones did hit us like an earthquake, so evolution did push us towards sex, but something was just holding us back. We weren't asexual.

It finally came to a head one Friday evening in our senior year. We had turned 18 six months before. It started out like many Friday evenings. We were watching TV, the parents out playing bridge till late.

I turned to Fran, "Another Friday. Glad classes are over for the week... Have much school work to do this weekend?"

"No, nothing. You?"

"Nothing, either... I'm a little bored. Want to go get an ice cream?"

"No thanks. Bored here, too."

"We do this a lot, don't we?"

"Yeah... Maybe I'll just go to my room and play with my pussy."

"Not a bad idea."

"What? Going to my room or playing with my pussy?"

"Both sounds good to me."

She looked at me to see if I was joking, "Seriously?"

"Why not?"

"Where's this coming from? We've never done this before."

"So? I'm going to jerk off and so are you. Why not together?"

She thought for a moment, "What exactly are you proposing? That we get off together or that we get each other off?"

"Well, both sound good, but if I get a choice, I'd pick door number 2."

She thought for a moment, "How about a little persuasion first? Kiss me."

I leaned into her and covered her mouth with mine. I'd kissed girls before and I knew she had kissed boys, so we weren't tentative. Her mouth was sweet, and her tongue immediately touched my lips. We traded tongues and breath for several minutes. "Is that persuasion enough?"

"Think we need a little longer..."

Somehow, it never really entered my mind that I was making out with my sister. It was like it didn't make a bit of difference that she was my twin.

We sat on the sofa and made out for maybe 30 minutes. Have to admit it was exciting and it was obvious we wanted more. I ran my hands around, trying to get re-familiar with her body. We had never been shy around each other and had often touched. However, that stopped a few years ago in the puberty tsunami. I explored her little breasts on the outside of her shirt and bra, her ass through her jeans.

She stood up and took my hand. We went upstairs to her bedroom. She pointed to a chair and said "Sit."

She took her place sitting on her bed. We just looked at each other for a moment, not sure how to start. By our twin connection, I knew that we weren't ready for anything complicated. I stood up and took off my jeans. She did likewise.

We took one final look at each other's face and both dropped our underwear. As can be imagined, I was hard and pointing at the ceiling. Her bush was a dark mass of curls. Neither tried to cover up. We simply looked.

She said, "I usually look at porn when I do this."

"So do I... Don't think I need it now. Do you?"

"No, definitely not. You're not even touching yourself and I'm wet as a sponge."

My hand immediately went to my cock. I started to slowly pump. She, meanwhile, covered her pussy with her right hand. It was apparent that her middle finger was no longer on the outside. She pulled up with it, exposing a line of pink on either side. When she repeated the action, it was wet pink exposed.

I quickly had the glans covered in precum. Her pubic hair was getting saturated in moisture. Her fingers separated further, going to the side of her vulva. She pressed down and her vulva emerged from the forest. Two eskers defined her split leading to a moraine that was her clit.

Needless to say, my cock got even harder at this erotic display. She pulled her middle finger from her depths so she could stroke her clit with the pads of her finger. Her inner lips were visible on the upstroke. Her eyes were clamped on my cock, as were mine on her hand.

In my imagination, I could smell her essence, although I was too far away to really smell her. I was sure that soon we would be close enough for me to taste it.

We were both moving hands faster and breathing deeper. I knew it wouldn't be long before I came. The muscles in her thighs were tightening, becoming long ridges under her skin. Her toes were alternating pointing straight out and curled up. Her palm was pressing harder on her pussy, flattening the hair. Her finger was moving in its mission. Her legs were spread and exposed her butt.

Meanwhile, the flow of precum oozing out of my cock increased. It spilled out and ran under my fingers. I felt my climax start from my toes. It ran a race to my cock. I couldn't stop it by squeezing my hand, "SHIT!"

A stream of cum shot towards her, not quite covering the full distance. A couple of drops hit her extended feet. She reacted as if the drops were burning napalm by cumming hard. She didn't say anything, but she stopped breathing for a few rapid heartbeats then gasped. And gasped again. And gasped as if she had been pulled from a burning house.

Not too surprising we didn't shout out our climaxes since we've been conditioned to silence for as long as we've been masturbating.

We both sagged down as if the bones in our bodies had turned to soup. My eyes met hers. I read the same thing she read in mine: lust. We knew this wouldn't be a one-time thing and that we'd escalate it.

"I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did."

She gave me the smile that launched a thousand ships, "Probably better."

"How often do you do it? I'm usually at twice a day."

"Once or twice... Have to admit that if it was as intense as what just happened, I'd want it 10 times a day, but that would probably do me in."

I could only nod my head in agreement. We would probably have gone another round, but we figured the folks would return soon. Their bridge sessions were variable, depending on how many couples showed up. They probably wouldn't come upstairs, just called out their return and expected an answer, but we couldn't be sure.

We got dressed and went back to the sofa. Without thought, we sat down next to each other, actually touching. I figured *What the fuck? Why not? * Reached down to put my hand on her upper thigh. She didn't even look at me as she put her hand in a congruent place on my leg. We simply started rubbing legs. Took me all of one minute to reach the crotch of her jeans. She put her hand on my rapidly rehardening dick and rubbed up and down.

Of course, the front door opened, and the parents came in. Our hands returned to safe territory, and we created a little space between us. I was sure we'd resume after they went to bed. They complained about the low turnout and Mom had a headache. So, they were off to bed.

We stayed up for another 30 minutes before heading to my room. As soon as we closed the door (no locks), we were in each other's arms kissing like we'd done it our whole lives. We didn't keep it up very long before simultaneously discarding out jeans and underwear. This time we sat side-by-side on my bed, legs in contact. A little more kissing and my hand tunneled into her forest while her hand had a firm grip on my erect cock.

Since she had watched me, she needed little instruction in how to move her hand. I just had to tell her how hard to grip it. Meanwhile, I was a babe lost in the forest. I cupped her vulva, pressing on it and rotating my hand to grind on her. She was getting stimulation because I was rubbing her clit, but she wanted more, "Put your middle finger in me. Don't push it in like you're trying to get the last of the jelly. Lay it parallel to the lips and bring your whole finger in."

She was very wet, and my finger easily slid into her as far as the labia minor, "OK?"

"Oh, yes! Move your hand up and down, rubbing my clit and caressing the inner lips... Oh, shit, just like that."

We ended the vocal instructions as we were having a hard time talking. It wasn't perfect for either of us, but it was certainly good enough. We kissed more urgently, reflecting our hand motions.

Wow, could I smell her essence! It caressed my senses like it was a tangible object. I stopped briefly, to her displeasure, to suck my middle finger. She opened her eyes to see what I was doing. They lit up. She knew what our next advance would be.

I returned to her forest which quickly became a swamp. Her face got flushed, and a pink area advanced up her exposed chest to her throat. Neither of us had the breath to resume kissing, and found panting was more comfortable. I used my other hand to touch her neck. Ran my fingers from her ear down to where it met her shoulder. This caused her to shiver, but didn't interrupt her work on my cock.

The glans of my cock was getting very wet with precum, "Use your thumb to spread the slickness."

She spread the moisture over the head and down the bottom side. The added slickness was a big turn-on. Her grip was perfect - as if she could read my mind.

I crooked my finger in her slit so that it went beyond the inner labia. Not far as I knew she was a virgin and I didn't really know where the hymen was, other than it wasn't very deep. There was a pool of soup there at the bottom that spilled out when my finger opened her labia.

She had a look of compete concentration on her face. I probably did, too. Her thighs were compressing her labia, so I had a hard time moving my hand. She recognized this (More awareness than I possessed.) and opened them up. I think every muscle in her legs was involved. Her quads got as rigid as guywires, long, lean cables that showed she was a runner. Her feet and legs were pointed straight out like a ballerina doing pointe.

Since I wasn't a runner, there wasn't as much definition in my legs. They were tucked back under the edge of the bed, my groin trying to thrust up to expose more of my cock to her hand.

The feelings were exquisite. We touched all the time, but this was so different. It was the first time I felt her. Can't really say what the feeling was because it wasn't describable. The only thing I could say that it was condensed lust. Pretty sure it wasn't love, but that didn't make it any less intense.

We were so excited that it couldn't keep going very long. She went rigid. Her whole body a single plank. Juice flowed out of her pussy, and she had a difficult time catching her breath. Seeing this my cock without any instruction from my body took over and I ejaculated a tower of white cum. I could almost hear it splatter on the floor.

Conditioning held and neither of us screamed out our joy. It was clear we would be repeating this frequently. And we did.

One side effect of our activity was that we dated even less than previously. Didn't seem to be any reason to date.

Our parents were thinking ahead, though. Two months before the prom Mom put Fran on birth control pills, "Why now, Mom?"

"Everyone knows that after the prom activities frequently involve sex and it takes a while before the pill is effective, so just to be safe..."

"I haven't even been asked to the prom and not sure I'm going."

"Won't hurt you and will keep your periods regular."

So that was how Fran became safe. It was food for thought even though we hadn't progressed beyond mutual masturbation. We ended up not going. Not that the prom night wasn't useful.

Because we were staying home the night of the prom our parents decided to have a date night of their own. They left for an early dinner and then went dancing. They connected with another couple, "We'll probably be late. We've left you some money so you can order pizza and enjoy a quiet evening."

Our parents' interactions with us were kind of strange. They were concerned with Fran getting pregnant, but on the other hand seemed unconcerned that we skipped prom and did little dating.

The pizza was on order before they got to the end of the block. We started looking for movies while we waited. Seems everyone was going out, so there wasn't a long wait for the pizza. We still hadn't found a movie that both of us wanted to see, so after pizza we just said, "Let's go upstairs."

We went to my room. Normally, when we masturbated, we just removed our clothes from the waist down (in case we got interrupted). Now we knew there wouldn't be any interruption. After kissing for a while, we stripped completely. We first just stood there looking at each other. I had never seen a fully naked woman in the flesh. She was beautiful, "Wow! You're absolutely gorgeous!"

That brought her smile. The combination was overwhelming. My cock was so hard. Harder than it had ever been. It felt like there wasn't enough skin to contain it. Her breasts were small, and the nipples erect. Looked like they were as hard as my cock. They weren't very thick but were at least three quarters of an inch long. Think they were longer than breasts were. Maybe my drooling was only in my imagination...

Her eyes were initially focused on my cock but quickly drifted over my whole body. I didn't have much chest hair, just a few curled around my nipples. Since I was fairly thin, there was a considerable definition of my abs. I hoped that I looked OK. She seemed happy and her smile broadened.

We closed the distance so that it was flesh on flesh contact. I regretted not having her turn around so I could see her ass, so had to be content with feeling it. As I expected from her running, it was firm. No excess padding, each cheek just a good handful. We explored whatever we could reach. When we felt satisfied with our knowledge of the territories, we fell together onto the bed.

I rolled off of her, so we were side by side. Now I could feel her tits and smooth abdomen. It was also the first time I had been able to see the full extent of her pubic area. The line of dark hair extended all the way to her bellybutton. A passing thought: that part would need to be adjusted when the swimsuit made its appearance. Her tits were small, especially now when they barely drooped off her chest. I learned later she wore an A-cup.

I knew enough without her giving me instructions, to start playing with her tits. Her skin was warm and smooth till I got to the nipple and surrounding terrain. The nipples drew most of my attention. I caught the right one between thumb and forefinger and pulled up, making it longer. Repeated with the left one. They were as hard as possible, like my cock. Bent over, my lips latched onto the right one. I alternated between them. Leaving them in a thick coating of saliva. She pushed me off and started sucking on my nipples!

Never thought my nipples were an erogenous zone, but she made me a believer. Her scent filled the room, so as she sucked I reached down to her pussy. It was definitely wet.

We knew that we wanted to taste each other, to bring the other off with our mouths. Neither of us wanted to relinquish our pleasuring of the other, so by twin-thought we rotated into a 69.

We lay side by side and she put a leg over my head to allow access to her pussy. I thrust my groin forward to allow her to take the head into her mouth. Her scent was overwhelming from a range of two inches, one inch, bingo. The tiny tastes I had enjoyed from licking my fingers were molehills to mountains. I went crazy licking everything within reach. From our earlier handling, I knew exactly where her sensitive parts were, so attacked them in earnest now with my tongue.

She, meanwhile, had enveloped my cock with her mouth. I thought I had entered one of those cavities in the lava that led to the molten heart of the volcano. Of course, our only knowledge of oral pleasure was through porn. Guess we knew enough that neither complained. Our biggest problem was restraining ourselves. I wanted to push my cock all the way to her feet. She wanted to flatten my face with her pussy, leaving only my tongue in her hole.

We attacked for what seemed like seconds, but it was surely minutes. Her pussy and my face were awash in her fluids. I poured out precum and the excess saliva made my cock super slick. Her hand moved with skill and determination, coordinated with her head motion. Her mouth, on fire, set my cock on fire! Her tongue explored every part of my cock. She couldn't reach the base, but that didn't make any difference in the electricity flowing from her to my cock. No way could I last. I fired a monster load into her mouth. She stopped moving and backed off far enough to have room for the fluid that she was trying desperately trying to swallow.

The momentary distraction allowed her to hold off her own climax. I redoubled my attack on her clit, pushed the jungle of hair aside. This accomplished the goal. She came, a river poured out of the bottom of her pussy and ran down her leg. I vowed that next time it would flow into my mouth and onto my face. If she said anything, I couldn't hear as her legs tightly covered my ears.

We had one more session that night. This time she was on top, so her flow covered my face, almost drowning me.

Graduation would soon be on us. We had been accepted at a university at the other end of the state and would begin in the fall. We found a two-bedroom apartment that we could rent. Our parents thought it was an excellent idea that we would be keeping an eye on each other - if they only knew...

We worked all summer to have enough money to live on. We had partial scholarships covering tuition, and the parents were helping out. Our summer jobs provided the cushion so we wouldn't come out of school deeply in debt. I was majoring in geology (surprise, surprise) and Fran in zoology. Fran wanted to try out for the track team. She was a little too slow to have attracted a scholarship but would try as a walk-on.

We busted our asses working in the summer. Little time for the beach. There was enough time available, so Fran had to trim up a little to be able to wear a bikini. I was happy to play barber.

We had decided that we'd keep our activities limited to oral until we moved out. Too much chance of either getting caught, or not having sufficient time to really enjoy it, or just anticipation. Not sure if our enthusiasm for college was as a learning experience or for sex with each other.

With all the rush of a glacier the time to move arrived. We drove the new SUV that the parents had given us as a graduation present. We weren't sure if it was a graduation present or a goodbye gift. That had taken a big load off because we thought we'd need to buy a car at the end of summer. It also limited how much we could bring. The apartment was furnished but we know what that really meant. Hence a couple of buying trips were required.

The first night at the apartment was a bust. We were so tired that we climbed into one bed and just slept. The next day was spent getting settled in. We went out for dinner, like a date. She was happy and her smile kept killing me all evening. I had a good idea of why she was smiling. Reflected the same expression on my face.

When we got home, we didn't stop short of the bedroom. I had both hands on her butt to hurry her along. That didn't work so well as she stopped to let me fondle it. Not for long. Then we were like cicadas: shedding our skins wherever. We were both naked by the time we got to the bed and then wrapped around each other.

There was anticipation that had accompanied our other extensions into sexuality. We knew that there wasn't going to be a limit to how we enjoyed each other. We rolled onto the bed still hugging. We continued to taste each other's lips and tongue while hands explored our backs. I pushed her back so that I could rotate into a 69 position. She wanted on top, so the rotation continued till I was face to face with her pussy. I pushed some hair aside and dove in. Even though we'd been satisfying each other this way for months, her flavor ran my excitement over the top. Her texture and her excitement level only added to my excitement. We knew neither of us would last very long, so getting off this way would allow us to experience sex longer.

She rubbed my face with her vulva, trying to push my tongue as deep into her as possible. That was to my liking as well and I swept my tongue from deep within to her clit. Tried curling my tongue around it, but she was moving too much. It didn't take long. Her flow increased and legs got rigid. Her climax forced more of my cock into her mouth and her suction became a whirlwind. I came as well. We could only make strange noises as our mouths were occupied.

Fran rolled off and turned around, so we were facing, "That's always so good. Now I'm looking forward to that just being the appetizer."

I readily agreed. We just held each other and gently stroked. I hadn't packed any condoms because she was on the pill, and we hadn't been with anyone else. Just the thought was enough to get my dick twitching. She felt it, so she reached down to take it into her hand. Didn't take me long to get hard.

She rolled back, pulling me by my hard cock. She opened her legs as I maneuvered around to get between them. She still had a hold of my cock and brought it to her pussy. She rubbed the glans from her taint up to her clit, covered it in her slippery fluids and my residual cum.

She placed it at her entrance and pulled a little. I got the message and slid the glans in a little till it met her cherry, "Fran, it'll probably hurt. Stop me if you need to."

"I don't give a fuck how much it may hurt. Just do it!"

I didn't argue with her. I pushed hard, felt her cherry stretch a little, then yield. I had pushed hard enough that it went in a few inches before I stopped. She grimaced, but didn't make any sign that she wanted me to stop. I pushed till I bottomed out. Then she tapped my shoulder and said, "Wait a minute."

I quit moving. Her pussy was twitching and that was more than enough to keep me interested. She test-wiggled around, "It doesn't hurt now... Keep going."

I started to slowly withdraw before gently returning. We apparently had a good match in length because at my deepest penetration I just touched her cervix. She was very wet, so I could move even though she was so tight that it felt like trying to stick a two-inch rod inside a one-inch pipe. The glans pushed a ripple of tissue ahead of it before it slid back past the corona.

We were too excited to last long, even with the pre-sex ritual. I pumped harder, driven by a million years of evolution. She responded by meeting every thrust. Biology won out and I sprayed her cervix with hot cum. She came, too. Now, we overcame years of quiet climax, "Oh, shit! Oh, shit! Oh, God. FFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKK!!!" she screamed out.

My response was to squirt the remaining cum into her and yell "FUCK!! Oh, yeah"

All motion stopped except for our rapid breathing. I finally pulled back a little as my shrinking cock didn't need as much clearance and I fell off of her. A stream of fluids, tinged pink, flowed out of her.

Her eyes had tears in the corners, but her smile was almost enough to set me off again, "Holy shit! Too bad we waited this long."

"Fran, we've got four years here, so we've got a lot to look forward to."

"Let's see: That's 4 times 365 times twice a day equals almost 3000 fucks we've got ahead of us... I can't wait."

I'm not sure we hit that number. We'd sometimes go many more times than twice, but when she had her period we might do fewer. Sometimes we just wanted oral or masturbation. We tried anal a few times with indifferent results. Think we also tried every sex position we could think of or find on the web.

The biggest interference was just our relationship. Two people can't live together that long without some friction. We were at a disadvantage vis-à-vis a married couple. They had love to fall back on. We only had lust. Most instances, it seemed to work. I don't think there was ever more than two weeks when we were mad enough at each other that we didn't have makeup sex.

Both of us would occasionally date. Neither were very serious. There wasn't a big breeding instinct because we had each other to relieve sexual stress, and I for one, didn't want anyone else. I was pretty sure our problems went back to our sister's death. We just didn't know how to love. We never found anyone we dated able to break that barrier.

We had friends, both mutual and individual. Unlike many college-age people, we didn't drink very much. Think this was a carryover from home. The parents allowed us to drink as long as we stayed home. Due to the lack of challenge, we didn't partake all that much. Sexy things were more attractive.

Fran, unfortunately, was too slow to make the track or cross-country teams. She still loved to run, so she joined a local track club. I would sometimes run with them, but I had discovered tennis. That became my preferred exercise. Fran took to running long distances. I discovered a nice unanticipated side effect. After a long run, 10 to 20 miles, she came back to the apartment all sweaty and emotionally relaxed. For some reason, this really turned me on. The smell of her body and muscle tone made my dick hard as a marathon. I grabbed her when she walked in the door and fucked her ass off before she could shower. Course, then we had to wash the sheets...

In her junior year she wanted to run a full marathon. The closest one was about a 4-hour drive away. I took her and we stayed at a motel so she wouldn't be too tired from a long drive before the race. I often attended her local races, being her cheering section. She was actually quite a good runner.

We got to the motel at dinner time. She checked in with the race and we attended the pasta dinner the race offered. In the morning, she started up near the front and maintained that position the whole race. I had brought my bike, so could follow her on the course. She appreciated my appearance at about 20 miles when she hit the wall. I was very proud of her finish: she was in the top 10.

She was a little slow and stiff-legged going back to the motel. We planned on a second night so she wouldn't have to spend the time immediately after the race in the car. As tired as she was, she had still enough adrenaline high that she welcomed my attacking her as soon as we walked in. It was delicious fucking her. We made sure we didn't further stress her legs but stressed the shit out of my dick.

We did work part time during the school year. I started out in a hardware store. Fran worked in the student bookstore. After my sophomore year, I began working for the geology department as a student assistant. Fran continued at the bookstore till her senior year when she became a student assistant in the biochemistry department.

Actually, her work at the bookstore was a continued source of friction between us. My job at the hardware store was mainly on the weekends and a couple of afternoons per week when I didn't have labs. Her job at the bookstore involved evenings, as well as Saturdays. The combination caused us to not being able to spend time together. That was solved in her senior year by her biochemistry job.

The other source of conflict was our dates. Not so much our dates because people expected siblings living together to do things together. Since we could do whatever we wanted when we got home, there wasn't any need for public displays of affection that could be misinterpreted (or rightly interpreted). It was our dating other people. We had this more-or-less agreement that whoever took the one twin out had to be satisfactory to the other. This really only meant that I wouldn't allow her to date creeps or the campus studs. She wouldn't let me date the campus round heels. We had some disagreements on close calls and yelled at each other a few times. Yelling was exceptional, though. Our normal method of showing displeasure was to be back off on sex. I doubt that we ever went so far as to sleep in separate beds.

So, here we were. In April facing graduation in early June. I had several job offers from companies in the oil business. Fran was interested in graduate school and eventually a Ph. D. She had been accepted at a couple of places. It was finally dawning on us that our separation was imminent. We both knew what was happening but neither of us had the courage to talk about it.

Deus ex machina.

Then our grandmother died. Our grandfather had passed when we were in junior high school. The other grandparents lived across the country, so we seldom saw them. Our grandmother had lived about halfway between our school and the parents' home. We attended the funeral and joined the parents in a wake at grandmother's old house.

Our parents said to go through the house and see if there was anything we wanted. They would return the next week and start getting rid of everything else and selling the house.

Fran and I wandered around. We'd enjoyed being here many times when she was alive. She had a den, complete with a gas fireplace, that we'd always enjoyed being in it, sitting in front of the fire. We went in there to remember. Fran found an old music CD. It was in a case that showed she had used it frequently, sitting on top of the player. I looked at the label. She had written the titles to a few songs that we supposed were on the disc. Most titles were smeared and difficult to read. I could only read three partial ones: "Never my Love" by the As... on; "Love is a Many Splendored..." by unreadable; and "If You go Away" by Rod McK...." There were a few more totally indecipherable ones. Maybe we could figure it out by listening to it.

We grabbed a couple of glasses of wine and sat in front of the fire. I put the CD on play. There was an excellent stereo system, and the CD wasn't scratched or anything. The first song was an instrumental that we couldn't name. The next was "Love is a Many Splendored Thing". Missing word fixed. It was interesting, but the stanza of "Two lovers kissed, and the world stood still" made a deep impression on me, and probably Fran. How could that have never happened to me? Fran and I kissed all the time, but the emotion expressed in that phrase never affected us.

Next was "Never my Love". There was an introduction to say the Association, completing the missing letters on the label. We listened all the way though, then hit pause. "What did you think of that one? Kind of haunting?"

"Nate, not sure what to think besides it being beautiful. It's a description of love I've never seen before. We've read a lot in English class, stories and poems, but that had a different effect on me. You too?"

"Yeah, it was different. Maybe we should explore some more of these ancient songs."

I hit play again, not realizing my world was about to change. A scratchy voiced guy started singing after some applause. It almost was singing and almost just spoken. It was complete despair for a lost love telling what would happen if she went away, then a ray of hope, then deeper in despair. At the end came the cannon ball through my heart that splintered my being into a million pieces:

"If you go away, if you go away

If you go away

PLEASE DON'T GO AWAY"

That was Fran and me. After June WE would be no more. I turned to Fran. She had tears pouring from her eyes. She hadn't cried since Caroline died. Now it was a river that matched the streams running down my cheeks. She obviously recognized that too.

"Oh, Nate, what are we going to do? I can't let you go. I'd sooner die than that."

"Fran, I feel the same way... Now I know... I love you."

"Oh, Nate. I love you too."

We didn't need to say it. We knew it. The twinness showed me her love and showed my love for her. We'll never know for sure why we hadn't felt this way before. Likely, Caroline's death was finally overcome, and we could love.

The words to the songs were more than images. They were emotions that Fran and I had never experienced, and they were irresistible. There were also images that weren't born from that CD: The sweat on Fran's back when she got home from running, the movement of her leg muscles as we fucked and her smile. Her smile: No longer just lovely, it was a planet capturing me in its gravity, holding me forever in orbit. I knew I couldn't live without that smile.

Fran took my hand, "I feel the same way. The emotions in these songs aren't more than the emotions we have with each other... Love me, Nate. Love me."

This time when I kissed her, it was very different. I don't know if the world stood still, but my heart did. There was such a rush of feelings that I didn't know when my heart would catch its rhythm.

We kissed forever. The CD played in the background. The player was set to infinite repeat, so it cycled as our backdrop. Then we started touching. It was as if we had never touched each other before. My cock was streaming precum. When I touched between her legs, her shorts were soaked. My hand rejoiced in her wetness. Her body was a gift, as mine was to her. We unwrapped our gifts.

We ditched our clothes in record time and lay tightly together on the carpet in front of the fireplace. If I believed in a god, this would be mystical. Maybe magical. Not sure, but it was so different from the hundreds of times we had been like this before.

Her ass filled my hands as if it had been designed to do. Pulling her in tight, I could feel her wetness running down the shaft of my cock onto my balls. She had never been this turned on in all of our adventures. Don't think I had, either. Only the experience of four years of sex with her kept me from cumming on her stomach. Nothing stopped her from cumming, and she ejaculated onto my stomach, "Oh, shit! Oh-oh-oh. FUCK!!!! Oh, shit, put it in me! Put it in me! Put it in me!"

I rolled her over onto her back. As if choreographed, she spread her legs, grabbed my cock and placed it at her entrance. I pushed into an incredible morass. Her pussy was underwater from all the moisture pouring out of her. I bottomed out and she came again. That finished me as well as I fired an enormous load into her cervix.

How wrong I was! My cock didn't soften in the least. I stopped for a moment to allow Fran to recover, then started moving again. I wasn't fucking her. I was loving her. My only goal was to make her enjoy every second, to have her cum till she couldn't move. I cared not a whit for myself. It was all for her. I tried to sense her feelings that told me how to move and what to touch.

She did the same for me. Our twinness came fully into play.

We lost track of time. We slowly built to a climax and, appropriately, "Never my Love" started playing again. This time we climaxed together.

We knew we could never leave each other. We also knew that we had a monumental rug cleaning task ahead of us.

The only things we took from grandma's house were the CD and the CD player.

When we got home, we immediately reconsidered our plans. She started a list of where she wanted to go to grad school and I a list of possible employers. No overlap. We weren't converging.

Then she came up with, "Nate, why do you need to work after we graduate?"

"Well, it kind of helps to be able to eat."

"Why not go the grad school instead?"

"Doesn't solve the eating problem."

"Sure, it does. Your grades are excellent - same as mine. I've been told there won't be a problem getting either a research fellowship or a teaching fellowship. You're in the same situation. Why not try it?"

"Why not, indeed."

So that's exactly what we did. Applied for graduate programs at the same university. Both of us were accepted. She got a research fellowship, and I got a teaching fellowship. Didn't really make much difference because both programs required at least one year of teaching, i. e., being a teaching assistant.

Now, I had to make a choice in what field to go into. I was always interested in fossils, so paleontology was a reasonable choice. The downside was there wasn't much in the way of post graduate opportunities. Fran had a much more open path. She could likely find an academic position or get scooped up by any number of companies. Considering the best path for me meant I picked a more traditional geology specialization.

Grandma also left us a little money. It was just enough for us to move and get a two-bedroom apartment.

I can't say the next five years were paradise. Graduate school was a lot more difficult than undergraduate. Long hours and difficult courses. This produced friction between us. Now, however, we had love to fall back on when we got irritated or mad at each other. We never reverted to simple lust. Sex was so much more rewarding than before we discovered old songs.

We had looked up all the information on the songs on the CD. I have to admit the CD was the oil on troubled waters many times. We'd argue until one of us would say stop. We put the CD (now on a thumb drive) and listened to it.

Who'd have thought that Rod McKuen was such a savior?

FIN

Author: If you've never heard "If You go Away", try one from a live McKuen concert.