ED a Detriment or a Benefit?

This story is about the advantages of erectile dysfunction. ED is the inability of men to get an erection. It happens to most men when they age. Viagra and its copiers have solved the problem for millions of men. But not all men especially as they age. Having high blood pressure and diabetes, common in the elderly, preclude its safe use. I argue that you do not need an erection for great sex.

Biology: What is the purpose of an erection? The role of an erection is to deposit the sperm deep in the vaginal canal so it can more easily reach the women's eggs. Most men and women's lives are usually trying to avoid conception, not enable it. What both men and women want is an orgasm that generates considerable biological pleasure in their bodies. We have all learned at an early age that the same pleasure can be achieved by masturbation. I am not suggesting that self masturbation is a replacement for couples having sex. Far from it, I am suggesting that couples that masturbate each other are a replacement for intercourse. Just think no more fear of pregnancy, or the side effects of birth control pills, and IUDs, or unavailable condoms when needed. Another advantage of ED is you don't make your thinking public. If you are at a beach full of bikini clad women; or where a bosom endowed barmaid in a short skirt is bending over the customers showing off her endowments and panties; or your partner is getting out of the shower naked, you don't always want to show what you are thinking by having an erection.

Masturbation: Manual masturbation, hand rubbing, is the norm that we all practice. However, when two people are involved many more options are available. Such as rubbing your penis on her tits, clitoris, outside of her vagina, and butt cheeks. Of course both her and your hands will also be involved. If you watch lesbian porn you will see that women like rubbing their pussy on legs, hips, and arms, not only just on hands for their arousal.

Oral sex: Oral sex is likely to be the best way for a man to climax quickly. For women oral manipulation involving the clitoris and the outer area of the vagina together with fingering the vagina and clitoris will usually produce an orgasm. For women most of their sexual stimulation comes from outside of the vagina just around the clitoris. Also there is an area just inside the vagina called the G-spot that can easily be reached with your fingers. With your thumb rubbing below her clitoris and your fingers on her G-spot, squeezing your fingers and thumb together in an increasingly rapid motion is likely to make her come. Few women have an orgasm from penile penetration alone. Women's greatest complaint about sex with men is they come too quickly, and then want to stop, while women are still just getting aroused. Mutual masturbation is easier to control when you come, especially if the woman is allowed to set the pace. She should always be allowed to climax first. Ladies first should be every man's moto.

Sex play: Sex should not be just at night time before sleeping. For retired men and women with a lot of time to enjoy life. I suggest morning and late afternoon or early evening sex play. This can be done daily or weekly depending on your desires. This sex play should not reach an orgasm but should keep the body aroused and looking forward to fulfillment at bedtime. It is early foreplay. For morning sex play, I suggest sponge bathing each other on the bed. Of course you could take a shower together and wash each other but a sponge bath is much more than cleaning the body; it is an erotic massage.

For a sponge bath, your partner will lay naked on a bath towel on the bed. You will be standing by the bed also naked. You will place a dishpan full of warm water containing a sponge on the bed, another empty pan, and a soap dispenser. You will wet her front side, avoiding her face and hair, with the sponge and then soap up your hands and rub her arms, chest, belly, groin, and legs. You will then wipe off the soap with the wet sponge squeezing the soapy water into the empty pan. You can use an unused thin sponge covered paint brush to help clean the soap out of her vagina. A finger taste test will ensure that all of the soap is removed. You will then dry her with another towel. When finished, You will roll her over on her side. You will then wash and dry her back and butt like you did with the other side. While you are doing all this you will be rubbing, licking, and sucking her tits and pussy. While rubbing her butt you can gauge if she might like any anal finger insertion. Having your face very close to her body will allow you to judge her enjoyment or any withdrawal from certain touches. This is much more intimate, educational, and enjoyable than just a shower. When finished it is her turn to sponge bathe you. She will get clean water and a bath towel and repeat the entire process with you laying on the bed.

For late morning or early evening sex play, I suggest setting aside time for a Happy Hour. During this happy hour you will play a game and both have only two alcoholic drinks each, of their choosing beer, wine, or a mixed drink. You will only wear short robes. The game is supposed to be fun. The game is called Body Parts and has you manipulating each other's body parts in a way of the other's choosing. Each player takes a drink after each turn is played. There are various variations of the game that you will rotate through, a different game each time The value of the game is not only the physical pleasure you receive by manipulating each other's erogenous zones; but, just as important, is the mental exercise of thinking about and discussing how you would like to give and receive sexual pleasure. Giving pleasure is just as rewarding as receiving pleasure.

The first game is called Dice. A dice has 6 numbers. Each number represents a body part: 1 is the mouth and tongue; 2 is the tits; 3 is the hands and finger; 4 is the clitoris or scrotum; 5 is the vagina or penis; and 6 is your choice. Each player will throw the dice. For example, if I throw 1 and you throw 5, I have to kiss your vagina. If you had thrown a 6 you could choose which body part I had to kiss. If interested, body parts not numbered are also included like anus or toes. Some throws might not be very interesting. For example, if we both throw 3 and 3, we will hold hands. Although nothing prevents our interlaced fingers from rubbing on our bodies. A 4 and 4 throw is very interesting and requires a detailed discussion as to how to best achieve it.

The second game is called High Card Wins. Each player will draw a card from a shuffled deck and the high card wins. If both cards are the same like a 7 of diamonds and 7 of clubs, the diamond wins. The winning suit order is hearts, diamonds, clubs, and lastly spades. What is interesting about the game is the bets. Each bet is made before the cards are turned. For example, I bet If I win I get to rub my penis on your tits. And you bet if you win I would have to finger your vagina. The winning bet will likely require further discussion, should it be done standing, sitting, bending over, or laying down. These bets need to be completed in a short time to move the game along. For example, if your bet was I was to finger your vagina until you climaxed, would not be acceptable because it might take too long. All body parts are included. For example, you might want me to suck your toes and I might want you to rub my back.

The third game is called Food Feast. It is played like High Card Wins but the bets are restricted to eating food off from the other players body parts. Foods like whipped cream, jam, chocolate syrup, or maybe liquids could be tried, be inventive. For example, I might want to eat a carrot put in your vagina. You might say OK but I will pick the carrot. You might pick a small carrot stick or a long peeled fat carrot. It is your choice. My favorite bet would be, I want to drink water from your vagina. I would have you lay on her back and lift your pussy upward. I would pour a shot glass full of water into your vagina and mix it around with my finger. I would then put the empty shot glass over your vagina and hold it tight and have you stand upright, draining the water mixed with your pussy juice back into the glass. We could then share the tasting of your juice. I wonder if the juice would taste different right after you had an orgasm.

The fourth game is called Porn Position. In this game a lesbian porn video is played from the internet. Lesbian porn was chosen to avoid penile penetration images. Before the video starts a dice is thrown and the number shown is the time when the video is paused. The players then act out that image. If the image is not sexual, the next sexual image is used. Then, the dice is thrown again and the player with the highest number gets to choose which of the two body positions they want to be in. All the turns are repeated until we finish our drinks or one hour has elapsed.

Summary: You can see that great sex can be enjoyed without intercourse. Sex with a woman involves arousing and satisfying a woman's clitoris and not vaginal penis insertion. Men are easily satisfied by manual manipulation, body contact, and oral sex. They don't require intercourse either. Men are often too focused on intercourse and not on their partner's needs. Penis size does not matter, if it ever did. A sexually satisfied woman will generate a lifetime of great sex.

Maybe if the person you are having sex with is not your wife. You can claim to your wife, like President Bill Clinton did, that "I did not have sex with that woman". He apparently believed, or wished that we all believed, that sex only referred to sexual intercourse. To some people abstinence means not having sexual intercourse. All other types of sexual activity are okay. They call that "outercourse". If you are one of these people, you can honestly say that you are practicing abstinence when talking to your parents, dates, or religious leaders.