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None of the people she'd been with had noticed. Of course, the one person who noticed that she tried to keep quiet during sex was Asa fucking Sheridan. The fuck buddy who wouldn't even call her by her first name had somehow caught onto an insecurity she'd been successfully hiding for years. Great.
"I didn't notice at first because we only fucked at work for the first few months," he told her one day, in between kisses. "I figured you wanted to be quiet in case someone walked by your office."
She rolled her eyes and brought him back down into another kiss. Years of boarding school and horny teenagers had given her plenty of exposure to the sounds women made during sex. They always sounded so... whiny? And fake. Like they were busy putting on a performance instead of actually enjoying themselves. She didn't understand how people could find those noises sexy. She didn't want to sound like that, she didn't want to turn off her partner, so she was careful to be quiet during sex.
Trying desperately to distract him, she ran her fingers down his smooth chest and slowly unzipped his trousers as she licked into his mouth.
He hummed in appreciation, but pulled back to continue his line of questioning. "Why is that, Carson?"
In lieu of a response, she reached into his trousers and stroked his erection with the amount of pressure she knew he liked. His eyes fluttered shut and he grunted before reaching forward and stilling her hand. "You're trying to distract me," he accused.
Yes I am, she thought. And you're not letting me. She pushed away from him slightly so she could sit up. Once she had the room, she crossed her hands in front of her and pulled her top off. His eyes immediately zoned in on the flimsy black lace that was barely holding in her chest.
He pulled her into a melting kiss, reached around to unhook her bra, flung it across the room, and laid her back down on the bed. His leg swung over hers and bracketed her in. Finally, she thought as his large hand came up to palm her breast. She smiled into the kiss, feeling victorious. Men are so simple.
Every man but this one, apparently. When he felt her smile, he sat back up, hand still on her breast (the man had some of his priorities straight at least). "You really don't want to talk about this," he pointed out.
"No," she admitted. She grabbed his other hand and brought it up to her other breast. Her hands on his, she helped him squeeze into her and she rolled her hips up to meet his. His mouth dropped open at the feeling of the heat through her jeans on his groin. "I don't. I would like to fuck you at some point, though. I thought that's why you came here."
When he leaned back down to continue kissing her, she thought the topic was laid to rest. She let herself get lost in him as he deftly popped open her jeans and started pulling them down her body. They got tossed away. He leaned down to plant a gentle kiss onto each of her nipples before working his way out of his own trousers and pants. Once he was free of them, he started to kiss his way down her torso.
About halfway down though, he hummed into her skin and sat back up. "I'm not satisfied," he said.
She rolled her eyes and mumbled, "Neither am I..."
"What about this topic has you so shy, Carson? I've never known you to be shy about anything," he thought for a second, then added, "Ever."
"Why do you care so much?"
He lowered himself back down over her and continued his path down her torso, punctuating each word with an open mouthed kiss. "I find you fascinating," he said between kisses.
She scoffed, but he was undeterred.
"Plus--" He was getting closer to her panties now. "I want to know what you sound like as you fall apart around me." He placed a final, hot kiss right over her clit. The lace muffled the feeling enough to make her ache for more. As always, she brought her bottom lip into her mouth and bit down on it so she didn't let out some kind of embarrassing squeak. She tried to squirm away, but he held her in place with his hips.
She let out a sigh through her nose and tried, once again, to end the conversation. "I just--" Speaking suddenly became very difficult. He was oh so gently rubbing his thumb up and down her lace-covered slit. "I just--I--"
"Use your words, Carson," he teased.
She was sure that she was starting to soak through the lace now. She closed her eyes and tried to collect herself. If she opened her mouth now, who knows what kind of noise would come out. He was still stroking her gently, but after a few seconds of breathing she had her bearings enough to say, "I just don't see why you'd want to hear me. Who knows what kind of embarrassing noises I'd make."
He stopped at that, and she was grateful for the break. The clarity it offered her helped her get out, "I wouldn't want to ruin our time together by squawking like some kind of bird and having you laugh at me the whole way home. Things have been working so far, haven't they?"
"Yeah, they have. But, you think you sound like a squawking bird during sex?" She could tell he was trying his best not to laugh at the mental image.
She sighed again, about at the end of her rope. "How should I know?" she asked without thinking.
His eyes softened. "You've never let go of all of that during sex? Not even once?"
She shook her head. "I never wanted to ruin the moment. I'm content to just hold back a little and leave the situation with my dignity intact."
"You don't have to hold back with me, Carson."
His eyes met hers with such open sincerity, it caught her off guard. For a second, she almost believed him. She tried to laugh it off, hoping if she gave him the answer he wanted they could just get on with it. "Well," she chuckled lightly. "Maybe one day I won't have a reason to be quiet, and I can be as loud as I want."
"You don't have a reason to be quiet now," he insisted.
Again without thinking, she said, "I don't have a reason to be loud now, actually."
She realized her mistake as soon as his eyebrow quirked up. "Is that so?" he asked.
Oh, she's in trouble now.
His strokes up and down her slit restarted. It only took a few to get her squirming again. Without stopping, he leaned over and took a nipple into his mouth. He was sucking on it gently, but wholly. She glanced down and saw her entire breast lifting up and down from the suckle of his lips around her sensitive skin. The sight of it, plus the feeling of his perfect mouth, shot straight to her cunt where he was still stroking much too gently, and she clamped her teeth shut and eyes shut.
Eventually, a full body chill ran down her spine and he took that as his cue. She initially thought that he was pulling back to rid her of her lace, but instead took her other nipple into his mouth and gave it the same tireless treatment.
When his tongue flicked forward to tease her while sucking, her hands flew up to their usual spot on his shoulders. She tried to concentrate enough to do the kneading thing he liked, hoping that it would throw him off his mission so she could catch her breath. No such luck.
When he finally had enough of her trying to squirm away from him, he released her nipple with a wet pop and stopped torturing her with too-gentle strokes. He hooked his fingers in the lace and pulled them down her legs. She barely had five seconds to catch her breath.
Never breaking eye contact, he spread his hands out over her hip bones. He pushed her gently but firmly into the mattress so she couldn't squirm again. He moved with an aching slowness so that every swipe of his skin on hers sent a jolt of electricity up her spine.
His nose started to run over her skin lightly. It was a whisper of a touch, just heavy enough to slowly drive her insane. As he swiped his nose along her lower belly, his breath tickled the invisible hairs there.
She felt her muscles jump involuntarily. An indignant whine creeped up her throat, but swallowed it down before it escaped. From the satisfied look on his face, she could tell he noticed. She took her bottom lip into her mouth again.
She watched him move further down her body until his head ducked down slightly. Suddenly, she felt his nose run up the crease of her thigh, his hot breath trailing along behind. She clamped down harder on her lip and threw her head back to look at the ceiling.
He moved to her center and dropped a gentle kiss a millimeter higher than where she wanted him to. She felt wetness seep out of her without her permission, and she gasped. The loudest noise she'd made thus far. Her hips lifted, searching for friction, but his hands were there holding her down. She bit back another whine and let her hands twist up in the sheets.
His breath left her core and she took the opportunity to slow her breathing down beyond the too loud gasps she was heaving out.
Too soon, his nose was trailing an identical path on her other side. She felt herself tighten every muscle in her body to resist a reaction to the gentle kiss she knew was coming next.
When it didn't, she lifted up her head to look at him in silent complaint. He was smirking up at her. She rolled her eyes and let her head fall back onto the bed. "Prick," she breathed.
He chuckled against her inner thigh before biting down hard. It caught her off guard and a breath punched out of her as her legs fell open wider for him.
Taking mercy on her, he drug his hands down her hips and over her thighs until he reached her knees. He pressed them down towards the bed and moved them slowly up towards her hips as far as they would go. She should have been embarrassed at the wet sound that came from between her legs as she opened up for him, but she was too distracted by the feeling of her folds unsticking from one another, baring her to him. She felt her walls tighten down on nothing, and the emptiness nearly made her cry.
"Okay," she said, propping herself up on her elbows. "You've made your point. I have been holding back, but I won't anymore. You wore me down, you win, all is well, let's get on with it."
His determined look made her roll her eyes for what felt like the millionth time, and she flopped back down on the bed again. She wasn't fooling him for a second.
Using her knees as leverage, he pushed himself up and lowered his torso onto hers. His warm skin on hers made her shiver initially, but as soon as he settled over her she relaxed into the mattress.
He placed open mouth kisses from her collarbone up to her ear, humming quietly each time he met her flesh. He nipped her earlobe at the same time he squeezed her nipple, earning him another gasp before whispering, "I don't think so, Carson. I won't stop until you're falling apart for me."
Three things happened at once. He bit harder at her ear, pinched cruelly at her nipple, and rocked forward. She felt every inch of him slide up through her folds, parting her completely. The head of his cock nudged her clit and she whimpered. He was so hard and so hot and so close. Another small flood of wetness left her, and her walls clenched repeatedly, begging to be filled.
He started to kiss down her body again, stopping briefly at each nipple to flick over them with his tongue. Nothing was enough. All of his touches were too light and everything was too slow. He had never taken his time with her before. No one had.
Her hands flew from where they were scrunched up in the sheets and landed in his hair. She grabbed handfuls and squeezed defiantly. The pain only made him moan against her skin on his way down. Her hips bucked up, but his warm hands against her knees prevented her from finding relief.
He was back at her core, looking up at her devilishly. Her arms had gone straight when her hands stayed locked in his hair. She used what little leverage she had and pushed her breasts together between her upper arms. She made eye contact with him over the valley they made, but he only shook his head.
"You're not in charge here, sweetheart," he teased. She squeezed her hands again, pulling his hair even tighter this time. He hissed. His brief look of pain twisted quickly into a smile.
Suddenly, his hands left her knees and grabbed roughly onto her hips. He yanked them both harshly down the bed. She felt her lower legs dangle off the bed, and they closed reflexively. From his new position kneeling on the floor, he had more leverage to slam her knees back into position by her hips.
At that moment, she felt so taken. So indescribably powerful and helpless at the same time.
Even though she knew it was fruitless, she squeezed her fists harder into his hair and tried to roll her hips up to meet his mouth. Predictably, he held her down. Her mouth opened and let out a frustrated moan; a sound she'd never heard from herself before.
She immediately relinquished his hair and her hands flew up to cover her mouth. It didn't sound like a squeak, or a squawk. It just sounded like her, in pleasure. Her eyes, wide with shock, met his. He just grinned at her.
He stood up and leaned his sculpted body over hers. He released her knees, but she kept them there this time, open for him. He gently peeled each of her hands off of her mouth and guided them back into his hair.
"Stop hiding from me, Carson," he whispered. "I want to hear you scream."
She shivered. "Oh, fuck."
"Keep your hands there," he continued.
She nodded and squeezed her fingers into his hair. He got himself settled on the ground, and she nearly groaned. It looked like he was planning on being down there for a while. She didn't know how much more of this teasing she could take.
After what felt like an eternity, she felt the very tip of his warm tongue swipe once up her slit. After so much build up, it nearly destroyed her. She took to biting her lip again and breathing heavily through her nose.
He swiped up her slit once more, this time focusing the tip of his tongue on her clit when he reached it. He was finally using more pressure, but the tip of his tongue was too small. She wanted his whole mouth on her so badly she couldn't breathe. She pulled his head down desperately, but he refused to give her any more. Undeterred, she tried to lift her hips up to meet his mouth, but that only caused him to push her knees harder into the mattress.
He pulled back slightly before using his tongue to gather some of the wetness at her hole and drag it back up to her clit. The extra slickness made her clamp down harder on his hair, and her breaths became more ragged.
Each time his head bent to flick her clit, she thought he was going to give in and start sucking on her like she wanted. He got closer and closer and closer, then pulled back and resumed the light flicks. He worked her into a frenzy like this for several minutes. One time, he had gotten so close that she felt the ghost of his lips on her skin. It nearly broke her.
She clenched her jaw down and whispered through her teeth, "Please, Asa. Fuck..."
She wasn't sure he heard her at first because he kept up his torturous pace. She was ready to say it again, louder, when suddenly his whole mouth was on her, sucking hard.
Her back arched up and her head flew back, mouth open. Another loud moan of frustration crawled up her throat, and half of it got out before she clamped her mouth down and swallowed the rest. All she could feel was warmth, and all she wanted to do was rock her hips endlessly into his mouth.
She felt another small gush of her wetness push out of her and drip down. Seeing this, Asa thrust two fingers into her and curled them up expertly, finding that spot immediately.
Still arched back in ecstasy, her hands left his hair, but instead of going to cover her mouth this time, they tangled in the sheets above her head.
He was still sucking on her clit, his tongue flicking rhythmically to match the pace of his fingers pressing up into her.
She absolutely could not hold back any longer. Her mouth opened on its own and a desperate moan filled the room. She was too far gone to feel embarrassed anymore.
The sound of her falling apart for him made him moan, the feeling of which caused her moan to turn into a whine. They were a mess of sounds and skin and all she knew was that she needed him now.
"Please!" she cried. She vaguely registered that she continued to chant "Please, please, please," as he pulled off of her with a smack and crawled back over her. He lined himself up at her entrance. The thought of their fluids mixing together there had her whining again.
She felt his arm slip under her head for support. He kissed her deeply for a few seconds, letting her get a taste of herself. Then, without warning, he slammed into her and took a nipple between his teeth.
She felt her eyes roll back into her head and her hands curl through his hair again. There was no stopping the sound that escaped her. It was beyond desperate; it was primal.
"Fuck, Asa!" she screamed.
In response, he reached his other hand down and started circling her clit in tempo with his thrusts, her nipple still in between his teeth. He was driving into her deeply; each pull of his cock through her walls being punctuated perfectly with a nudge at a spot inside of her that made her see stars.
She couldn't breathe. She couldn't see. She didn't want to. She would have given anything to remain in that moment forever.
Her walls were beginning to clamp down around him tightly. He released her nipple and she whimpered at the loss. His breaths were coming in gasps now, too. "Are you close?"
Normally she would have nodded and bit her lip, but now she screamed "Yes, yes, yes!" as he continued to pound into her.
"Scream for me," he commanded. "Don't hold back, Skye."
He leaned back down to suck her nipple into his mouth, doubled the speed of his fingers on her clit, and thrusted up into her three more times. That, plus the sound of her name in his mouth had all of the muscles in her body seizing up at once.
She shattered.
The cry she let out was ear piercing and long. For the first time, she was hearing what she sounded like when she came.
She felt like a goddess.
She didn't have it in her to feel bad for Asa, whose ear was right by her mouth. She needn't have worried, though. At the sound of her completely giving into the moment for the first time, he experienced a release of his own. Her cunt was gripping him like a vice, like she didn't want to let him go.
As he worked her through the aftershocks, she let all of the little sounds she would usually bite back fall through her lips. Asa was kissing at her neck, not wanting to muffle any of the glorious sounds he'd worked so hard for.
When he finally rolled off of her, she gasped a little at the way her walls fluttered at the sudden emptiness. He swallowed her gasp in a kiss that somehow made her toes curl even though her whole body felt like jelly.
"Carson," he whispered into her mouth. "Never, ever hold back with me again. Do you hear me?"
She nodded, not quite capable of words yet.
"My new goal in life is to make you scream like that as often as possible." He pulled back and smirked at her. "Think you're up for that?"
She pulled him back down into a searing kiss that had them both impossibly rolling their hips into each other despite being totally fucked out.
When she finally ended the kiss, she wrapped her hands back through his hair and gave them a tight squeeze, eliciting a surprised hiss from him.
Smirking right back up at him, she taunted, "Are you?"
His answering smile was enough to make her never want to hold back again.
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