Prodded and Probed

"How are you feeling now?" Twig asked as he watched Prince Sebastian bathe in the stream.

"For the last time Twig, I feel fine!" The Prince sighed as he ran his fingers through his wet floofy hair.

Twig observed the naked man before him and couldn't help but stare at his neck, a deep purple bruise was forming where Queen Zuri had bitten him. It didn't look healthy one bit. Purple bruises didn't necessarily mean something bad, it was part of the bodies healing process, but something about it concerned the young scholar and he made a note to keep a close eye on it.

"Sorry about that, I had to take a shit!" Alexis walked out from a row of nearby bushes.

"Charming as ever." Twig rolled his eyes.

"Do you think," the Prince began "that if I cum in the water my spunk will float or sink?"

"We don't have time for masterbation!" Twig insisted "if we don't start heading towards the next Kingdom soon it'll be nightfall!"

"There's always time for a quick flick of the bean Twiglet, why don't you knock one out? It'll loosen you up!" Alexis nudged him.

"Alexis has a point Twig, when's the last time you had a wank?" Seb said as he washed under his arms.

By this point Twig had gone bright red and contemplated storming off to wait by the horses.

"I do not want to have a wank! I haven't had the need for one before and I certainly have no need for one now!"

"Holy shit! You're a virgin!" Alexis cackled.

"And?" Twig rolled his eyes again.

"You do know this whole quest is about fucking right? Why did you want to come?" Alexis asked almost sincerely.

"I didn't want to come, I was forced to!"

"By your tutor the royal sorceress?" Seb asked as he massaged his soft cock and balls.

"She's worse than that!" Twig exclaimed, "she's my mother!"

Alexis and Seb both looked at him mouths agape.

"Holy shit! So you're like a proper sorcerer?" Alexis asked.

"No, that's not how it works, it's a hierarchy thing."

As Twig began to explain Seb walked out of the stream and placed his hands on his hips soaking in the rays of the afternoon sun.

"Witches have a High Priestess, wizards have an Arch Wizard and they both answer to the sorceress aka my mother."

"So what are you?" Alexis asked. "Witch or wizard?"

"Well, I'm actually neither."

Seb and Alexis looked to each other in shared confusion.

"Well I say neither, I guess I'm both. My mother was born a wizard and my father was born a witch, so I'm a mix of both."

"What is the difference between a witch and a wizard? I always thought witches were women and wizards were male." Seb asked as he sat himself down on a large rock. Spreading his legs open and letting it all hang out.

"Common misconception, but both witches and wizards can be any gender, the difference is witches possess more supernatural abilities such as foresight and necromancy, and wizards possess more intellect based abilities that make them more knowledgeable in creating different potions and stuff."

"Yeah?" Seb asked. "Yeah... no that's gone right over my head mate. But you can be whatever you want to be!" He smiled warmly.

"Good job!" Alexis stated seemingly out of nowhere. "Did a pretty solid job at changing the conversation from you being a virgin and having a wank."

Twig rolled his eyes and then clapped his hands together, "right we best make a move." He looked over to Seb who seemed to be scratching himself.

"Are you sure you're alright?" Twig asked with concern.

"Yeah fine, just hot. You're right though let's make a move." Seb gets to his feet and begins gathering up his clothes whilst Twig watches him closely.

Our three friends had a little sing song as they walked through the mass of seemingly never ending trees, and several times a bored Alexis would ask how far from the next Kingdom they were.

"Should be just over this hill." Twig nodded towards the large mound.

They struggled up to the top of the hill and once up there they stood still and looked out at the view.

"Wow!" Alexis exclaimed. "Would you just look at that beautiful mass of nothing!"

"There should be a Kingdom here, it says in my book!" Twig frantically flicked through the pages of his old worn leather book filled with notes about anything and everything.

"Well, your book is wrong because all I see is fields of nothing except... what is that?" Alexis squinted to try and see better.

"Some kind of crop?" The Prince added unhelpfully.

"It's corn, it says here in my book, the people who live here grew corn for a living. But the whole kingdom wasn't just corn, there was a whole castle and village viewable from this hill."

"Give me that!" Alexis snatched the book out of Twig's hands. She looked between the drawing and the view several times before passing the book to Seb who did the same.

"Yeah there was definitely supposed to be a kingdom here!" Seb agrees as he hands the book back to Twig.

"That's what I've been saying, it makes no sense!"

"What about that house was that always there?" Alexis asks nonchalantly.

Seb and Twig both look in the direction Alexis was pointing.

"How the fuck did we miss that?" Seb asks in disbelief.

"It is in the book! But it's part of the larger village. Now it's just on its own." Twig's face contorts into one of bewilderment.

"Last one there is rotten egg!!!" Seb laughs as he dashes off towards the building.

"Fuck sake!" Alexis exclaims before chasing after the Prince.

Twig stands staring out at the field of corn for a long moment before following his companions.

Once they were all inside they were naturally all inclined to look around, it didn't interest me I must say. It was quaint, Seb appreciated the humbleness of the home having been accustomed to living in a palace all his life. Alexis and Twig both felt the same, although their rooms in the servants quarters were far more humble than that of Seb's, this was still far more humble than even their dwellings.

Seb sat himself on a wooden chair by the fireplace and kicked off his boots.

"One could get used to this shit!" He sighed as he warmed his bare feet.

"Is there any food going?" Alexis asked Twig who sighed as he made his way into the small kitchen area.

Twig opened all the cupboards and found nothing but corn. This wasn't much of a surprise the farm was only growing corn, but what was surprising is that this corn was newly cultivated.

"Something fishy is going on here," he muttered to himself.

"Oh, fish? What kind is it? I could go for a nice battered cod right now!" Alexis liked her lips whilst Twig rolled his eyes.

"No, I said there's something fishy going on here, something weird, first the kingdom is gone, now there's one remaining farmhouse which is stocked full of freshly cultivated corn. Someone must be living here." Twig pondered out loud.

"Well whoever it is, they're not here now. So might as well make ourselves comfortable!" Seb yawned as he began stripping out of his clothes.

After eating some corn they looked around and found a small bedroom with only one large bed, Alexis suggested Seb and Twig share it whilst she takes the chair downstairs and keeps guard.

In bed Seb lay on his side looking at Twig who had dressed down to his long undershirt that acted almost like a nightgown.

"Are you really a virgin?" Seb asked curiously.

Twig didn't respond, just laid there in silence.

"Because if you are, I can help change that!" Seb placed a hand on Twig's chest, but the coldness of it made Twig shudder and turn to his side facing away from him.

"There's something wrong with you!" Twig yawned.

"What!" Seb sat upright. "Because I'm horny all the time? What's wrong with that?!"

"No, not that, there's something wrong with your body, you're cold. Your skin is more sensitive in the sun..."

"In case you hadn't noticed mate I'm a ginger!"

"No, I mean more so than usual. Do you truly not feel any different?" Twig asked, turning back to face Seb, their eyes finding each other in the dark.

"Well, I suppose I feel more awake than I usually do. I'm usually out like a light at bedtime, always have been, I love my sleep! But maybe I'm just horny."

Seb admired Twig's neck. Noticing the vein throbbing gently against his fair skin.

"Yeah it's probably just that." Twig yawned. "Try and get some sleep, yeah?"

Twig fell asleep almost immediately after, but Seb laid on his back looking at the ceiling in the dark.

A couple of hours later the room began to shake, subtly at first and then more violently, Seb didn't need to stir Twig awake, the motion woke him up immediately. Alexis burst through the door and yelled "EARTHQUAKE!"

Seb and Twig clambered out of bed and prepared to climb under the bed to safety with the aid of Alexis, but they were stopped in their tracks when blinding white light flooded the room.

The trio could feel themselves being lifted off the floor, the motion made Twig feel as if he were going to throw up. But before he could even consider it he was back on stable ground.

The ground under their bare feet was smooth and warm as if it had been heated from underneath. They stood there like lemons, their eyes trying to adjust to their new brighter surroundings as two large black shadows began to approach.

Once they adjusted the two figures became more visible. They were tall, really tall! Standing about ten feet tall. They were naked, but their bodies were smooth, void of any imperfections and their skin was a mottled grey like a grey cloud against an otherwise blue sky.

Their eyes were large and black, pure black, void of any light, it looked as if they were really enlarged pupils and the trio could make out their reflections in them.

Their heads were bulbous and were larger on the top, they were bald, had slits for nostrils with no noticeable nose and their mouths were small and almost beak like with a natural pout.

None of our trio screamed, they were too frightened to make a noise. They just stared at the creatures as they stared back at them.

"Are you human?" The creatures asked in unison without moving their lips. When nobody answered them one of them pulled out a strange contraption that looked kind of like a barcode scanner you'd see in shops. The creature scanned it over all three people in succession and then turned to its companion sharing silent information.

"Not human." They both decided.

"Oh, I'm definitely a human!" Seb protested finding his voice.

The creatures stared blankly before repeating "not human, not one specimen here is human."

The three of them looked at each other in confusion, there was an argument to be made that Twig wasn't technically human he was after all half wizard and half witch, but the other two?

"What are we then?" Alexis asked, crossing her arms.

One creature pointed a long fingerprint-less and nail free finger at Twig and said in a clear deep voice "Maga!"

"What did he call you?" Seb whispered. "Some kind of slur?"

"No, it means witch in the old language." Twig clarified.

The creature then pointed at Seb and said "Moroi!"

Seb looked to Twig for clarification.

"Did you not learn anything in language class?"

Seb shook his head.

"I was far too busy learning profanities."

He then looked over at Alexis who gave a smug and approving nod.

"It means evil spirit." Twig reluctantly responded.

"Harsh! I'll have you know I'm royalty!" The naked Prince looked almost comical puffing out his bare chest at the creatures. They ignored him in turn and pointed to Alexis.

"Orcus!"

"Wait! I know that one!" Seb replied excitedly. "It means orc! Or was it ogre?"

He then turned to Alexis.

"Are you an orc or an ogre?" He asked.

"Certainly not!" She exclaimed in return.

"But my parents were."

"Your parents were what? Orcs or ogres?" Seb asked in bewilderment.

"Yes" was Alexis' reply.

"There will be silence!" The creatures demanded. "We will not examine your forms to determine how you function.

The three of them were led to comfortable chairs. Alexis and Twig were both stripped bare before the three of them were strapped down and then the creatures measured and prodded and examined each part of their respective bodies.

"Open your mouth." A creature told Seb who did so willingly, opening it as wide as it could go.

The creature then placed a pill on the tip of Seb's tongue and closed his mouth. Seb swallowed the pill before gagging.

"THE FUCK WAS THAT!" He hissed. "TASTES LIKE GARLIC!"

"It was garlic." The creature said bluntly.

"Why would you give me garlic? You freaks!"

"It was a cure." Twig stated. "You were becoming a vampire like Queen Zuri."

Seb wanted to protest, but was too flabbergasted to reply.

"You are very intelligent for one of your kind," a creature approached Twig.

The two began a long conversation talking about anything and everything whilst the other creature took particular interest in Seb's genitalia.

"What do you use this for?" It asked.

"Fucking mostly."

The creature looked blankly almost savouring the word. "Fug-ing?" It asked.

"Yeah sticking it in a hole, pounding away til the cows come home!"

The creatures both paused what they were doing before looking at each other and laughing in a high pitched noise that flickered the lights.

"What the fuck?" Seb looked over at Alexis who similarly looked confused.

"We apologise for our abrupt partaking in laughter, but our kind find cows incredibly funny."

"Come again?" Seb asked blinking several times.

"They are hilarious creatures, they have four stomachs and expel methane from their belches! It's most comical."

"Right..."

"Back to the point at hand, this instrument, is it used for procreation?"

"Yeah, it can be! I've never made a baby with it though. Not that I know of anyway, have you never seen a dick before?" Seb asked.

"We have seen genitalia, yes, but we've never examined creatures like yourselves in depth before. We are descended from your kind and find our ancestry most fascinating."

"You are descended from people?" Twig asked.

"Yes, our Mother of which we all descended was once human before a chemical reaction transformed her into the first of our kind."

"And what is your kind? If you don't mind me asking." Twig smiled at the creatures now standing side by side.

"We have no name, we have no use for names, nor identities of any kind. We are all the same. Created from our mother's cells. But on one planet we visit frequently whose inhabitants are very similar to yourselves, they refer to us as the Greys or aliens!"

"Fascinating! And what happened to the kingdom you came from?" Twig continued his line of questioning.

"We stripped the old architecture and its inhabitants down to the purest materials and used them to build our crafts and a new settlement on a planet far from here."

"You killed the villagers?" Alexis asked in disgust.

"Regretfully so, that's why we find you so fascinating. Your genetic makeup is the basis of our own. The inhabitants of Earth are similar and we have studied them in depth, but they are not the same."

"What are the differences?" Twig asked curiously.

"Oh, who gives a shit?" Seb groaned. "This one has its hands on my cock I can't think of anything else!"

"Do you like my hand on your cock?" One of the creatures asked.

This made Seb blush, and his reaction fascinated the creature who began gently rubbing the now erect penis.

Seeing this the other creature walked over to Twig and admired his penis.

"Don't even think about it!" Twig protested and the creature shrugged instead moving to Alexis.

"This creature has an instrument, but it's much smaller and sits above an opening of some description." The creature studied its long finger and looked at Alexis. "May I?" It asked politely.

"Be my guest." Alexis smiled as the creature proceeded to push its finger deep into her opening

Alexis moaned out in pleasure as the tip of the creature's finger reached her G-Spot. The pleasurable reactions of their subjects made the creatures more intent on stroking and fingering Seb and Alexis respectively.

"Fuck yeah!!!" Seb moaned out as his leg began to shake a little from the edging.

The creature fingering Alexis looked over to Twig, "are you sure you wish not to partake in this activity? Your companions appear to be enjoying themselves."

"I'm good." Twig replied "but thank you anyway."

The creatures continued their work, the creature studying Seb noticed his tight ass and decided to push his finger into it causing Seb to scream out in pleasure. He fought against his restraints, but the restriction just made the pleasure far more intense.

The creature studying Alexis began rubbing her clit as it fingered her causing her to similarly scream out in pleasure.

She looked over to Seb and he reached out to her, their hands interlocking as they both relished in their pleasure.

The creature's skins provided some kind of natural lubricant which made the penetration much easier and far more pleasurable. They began to enjoy the feeling of making their subjects feel good and did not wish to stop, but as the one pleasuring Seb began to feel his prostate throb he watched as the Prince ejaculated all over himself. The creature was surprised by this, but didn't plan on stopping until Seb begged him to.

The creature examined the viscosity of Seb's cum and extracted some of it placing it in a test tube.

When Alexis' moans died down the creature pleasuring her also released himself from her pussy.

"This one does not seem to produce the same substance, yet it seems to have experienced the same kind of pleasure." The creature noted.

"It's spunk!" Seb panted.

"It's seman." Twig corrected. "It's what is used to fertilise the female egg."

The creatures looked at Alexis with amazement.

"This female lays eggs?" One asked.

"No, I bloody well don't!" Alexis protested.

"The eggs are inside of her." Twig continued as he explained the reproductive process to the creatures.

"May we extract one of your eggs?" A creature asked as Alexis shook her head.

"It will not hurt, we assure you, it'll just take a second." It reassured her.

Alexis wasn't convinced, but consented and before she could even blink it was done. An egg was placed in a separate test tube from Seb's sperm.

After a few more tests the creatures resolved to let our friends go. Unfastening them from their chairs.

"I have one more question." Twig smiled as he was offered back his shirt. "Who lives in the farmhouse?"

The creatures laughed and replied with "we do! It is our home, we want to reenact the lives of our ancestors, so we live and farm and do as they did."

With this Twig was satisfied and our friends said goodbye to the creatures who had been most hospitable.

When they were returned back to the farmhouse they were all placed in a sleeping state. And when they awoke the next morning they had no recollection of the previous night's events. And they all had bad headaches. As Seb groaned and looked out the window to the vast cornfield he noticed a large pattern amongst the corn. A crop circle, left by the creatures as they'd departed.

"That sun does feel good" he stretched as Twig looked over at him realising that his Prince had recovered from whatever transformation he had been subjected to.

And certain there was nothing else to see our friends headed through the corn and out to the other side towards the looming woodland that stood in the distance.

It's a shame that our friends forgot their extraterrestrial encounter, I myself am good friends with the creatures who we can best describe as a couple. I find myself sitting with them from time to time and enjoying corn as they share stories of their planet and plenty of jokes about cows and their four stomachs.

In the next chapter our friends reach the outskirts of the woods whilst the moon is at its fullest and the creatures they encounter are at their most active.