Ch. 02 - Sand and Tears

Carys McDonald was not happy. She was late, and although Jez, the manager at the surfer shop where she worked, was likely to be even later (he and punctuality tried to ignore each other as much as possible), she did not like being late. She grimaced as she thought back over the chaos that had been her morning so far while she rushed to try to catch her bus. Nobody had been stirring in the house she shared with three others of the surfer community; she considered herself to be one of them even though she had a full-time job; she, at least, wasn't prepared to "doss around", but she could surf, and quite well... at least in her opinion! Even so, she did find it challenging to make ends meet every so often and was occasionally a bit late with her rent.

Things got more difficult when she gave Neil his marching orders a couple of months ago and had to start finding the whole rent out of her meagre wages, but all in all, she was a lot happier now that he had gone. She sighed, he was good looking, you had to admit... sun-bleached light brown hair, broad shoulders, trim waist... a surfer, full of his own importance, selfish and a lousy lover, a ro-ro shag, she thought evilly, roll on, roll off. She had ended up so frustrated that she was picking fights with him over everything, and he never even realised why; he was so self-centred. She still kept finding little pockets of sand in her drawers and corners, where he would strip off his wetsuit and just drop it onto the floor, leaving it for her to sort out.

The bus arrived just as she reached the stop, and she found a seat and stared unseeing out of the window. There had been no coffee in her jar; one of the others must have taken the last of it. She didn't mind too much, but it would have been nice to have had the opportunity to replenish rather than go without. The bread had gone mouldy, so she would either have to buy a sandwich at lunchtime... more expense... or go without. She was well aware that with her big frame, she stood a bit over six feet tall in her bare feet; she did need to eat, or she would not feel well at all as her blood sugars dropped. She kept herself in trim and knew that she had precious little body fat anywhere... well, apart from two places! She giggled and glanced down at the pretty white top, with the plunging neckline and the embroidery around it; not the kind of thing she preferred to wear for work, it tended to show off more than she liked to show in a work environment, but her tee shirts were still wet, because she had forgotten to hang them out to dry yesterday. She was under no illusions that she was well endowed; she'd been told often enough and knew that many men had difficulty looking at her face because of it. Welllll... they had helped sell more than a few surfboards and wetsuits! She grinned.

She was so full of her own thoughts that she nearly missed her stop - not that it made a great deal of difference. The next stop was only a little further from the shop, but in the opposite direction. Ducking her head instinctively to avoid the door frame, she hopped off the bus and started striding down Hall Street towards Bondi Beach.

... something hard and unyielding caught her a wallop directly in her cleavage! She gasped and folded over a little, hand going up to rub the spot, her eyes squeezing tight shut in pain. There was a screech of rage that sounded to have come from the region of her knees, and she opened her eyes and looked down. Her eyes locked with a pair of furious-looking sea-green eyes, which suddenly opened wide, all anger vanishing instantly, to be replaced with shock.

A tiny girl with a huge mass of dark auburn hair tumbling in luxuriant waves over her shoulders was sprawled on the pavement with a small suitcase and a padded laptop bag. Carys noticed that her hair was so long that it had actually spilled over the pavement around the girl's shapely rear!

She gasped, her eyes widening as she looked into the most beautiful face she could ever remember seeing, slightly arched eyebrows, firm lips, petite nose, ever so slightly turned up at the end, ivory skin, almost like one of those porcelain dolls she remembered seeing in a museum years ago, and that hair... oh, that hair!

"Oh my god, I am so sorry... here, let me help you", she said and reached down and grabbed the girl's hands. As their fingertips touched, Carys nearly swore as she felt a jolt run up both arms, almost as if she had had an electric shock! The other girl caught her breath sharply as if she had also felt it, and Carys shivered and gasped: "Ooh... here, up you get", and heaved the tiny girl upright. She was no weight at all, and Carys felt her hands tighten on her own as they stood and stared at each other.

"Oh, thank you...," the small girl said breathily, and Carys realised that she wasn't Australian; she was Scottish. The small part of Carys' brain, still functioning correctly, wondered why she should bump into a Scot in the middle of Bondi while the rest of her brain tied her stomach and chest in knots. She could barely breathe; she was almost panting as she stared and stared and stared.

Little black lacy halter neck, tight black trousers and a lithe, toned body that really was to die for, oh, and that hair! Carys longed to seize the small girl in her arms and just stroke and stroke.

The ivory skin was turning a dusky pink, rising from those pert little breasts up her neck to her cheeks. Carys could feel a blush starting on her own cheeks as well, under the tan.

The small girl also seemed to be having some problems breathing normally, gasping, "Wow... no... oh... I'm so... sorry... I should have been... watching where I was going!"

Carys could feel her arms trembling as she clutched at the other girl's hands. "No harm done... I hope?" she panted. The other girl shook her head silently, almost as if she didn't trust herself to speak, staring almost desperately into Carys' eyes.

Carys could feel the redhead's hands clamped, almost vice-like, onto her own and glanced down. The other girl did too, and Carys realised she was so close she could have leaned down and kissed her. They both took a half step back from each other. "Uh... I'm... I'm sorry," said the other girl, very slowly releasing Carys' hands.

"No... no!" thought Carys, "Please don't let go," but her mouth stammered: "No... no worries, hope you're OK, sorry about that... I need to go to work... late..."

She turned and almost ran away to the corner with Campbell Parade and turned right, only to stop three or four metres later. Her brain was screaming at her, telling her to go back, go and talk some more, get the girl's number, at least!

She dithered for what felt like an age, then took a huge, shaky breath and turned round, almost running back to the corner. Her heart plummeted; there was no sign of the little redhead. She must have gone into the Ravesis. Carys vaguely remembered seeing a taxi pulling up there while hurrying along Hall Street.

She took a step more and then stopped. Her courage failed her completely. How could she walk into a strange hotel, approach a complete stranger, and say, "Hello, I fancy you. Can I have your phone number?"

She slowly turned away, tears prickling her eyes and slowly walked back to the corner and down Campbell Parade, as a tear trickled down her cheek. She sniffed and thought, "Just another failure in my life, another missed opportunity because I didn't make the right decision quickly enough."

She walked slowly on, and as she turned the corner, she could see that, as usual, she had arrived before Jez. "At least he won't see that I've been crying," she thought as she fumbled for the shop keys.

She opened up the shop and made sure that the float in the till was balanced and that the card reader was connecting to the phone line correctly, sold a few tins of board wax, grumbled at Jez when he wandered in just before ten, but her heart just wasn't in it. Several times, she caught herself glancing out of the storefront, knowing that she was hoping against all hope that the little redhead would walk by and she could run out and talk to her.

As the day wore on, Carys felt drained, even dozing on the bus on the short trip home. She stopped at a convenience store and got more coffee and eggs, but her actions were on autopilot. She felt uncharacteristically deflated, listless, and lethargic.

The following day wasn't any better, but at least she had coffee this morning. She didn't want to eat, and, deep down, she knew that hunger was probably the leading cause of her mood, but she didn't really care. There was an emptiness inside her that wouldn't be filled with food, so why bother?

Business was brisk, but the day seemed to drag on and on, and by closing time, Carys felt so low, she was ready to burst into tears. Just for once, Jez seemed to have a handle on her very low mood and sent her off, telling her he'd be fine to cash up and close the shop. They were closed tomorrow and all over Christmas, so he wished her a Happy Christmas as she left. Carys returned the greeting in a small, sad voice, her eyes brimming with tears and Jez briefly wondered what on earth had got into his usually lively, bubbly work colleague, and promptly forgot about her as he thought ahead to the few days off... beer, sun and surfing, he was looking forward to it! He whistled as he pulled down the shutters, set the burglar alarm and walked off into the early evening sunshine.

Carys got off the bus, and as she walked slowly home, she pulled out her battered old phone and sent a text to her best friend, Maisie. "Feeling a bit crook, mate. Wanna drop by with a beer? Xxx"

She knew that would bring Maisie running. Mary-Louise Eckhard and she had been friends since they were at school together; they'd been lovers in their final year at school and beyond, but it was always off and on again. Carys had started seeing another old school friend during an "off" time, discovering that men were another option. She knew that Maisie had never had another relationship, she knew that she still "carried a torch" for Carys, and she knew that she was manipulating Maisie. Still, she really, really wanted some close physical contact, a big hug from someone who wouldn't expect sex afterwards. "Well, probably won't," she thought wryly, "but at least Maisie takes 'No' for an answer the first time!"

Her phone tinkled with the awful jingle that she had never bothered to change, and she flipped up the messages screen. Maisie's number was there, as she had half-expected and she opened the simple message: "omw 7 xxx"

"Just over an hour," Carys thought gratefully, just time to have something to eat, provided the greedy galahs she shared the house with hadn't eaten her food and drunk all her coffee like yesterday. She didn't feel like eating at all, but forced herself to cook scrambled eggs and frozen peas and sat down in the kitchen to eat. She guessed the three men were down at the beach and probably wouldn't be back until long after dark, possibly not at all. Small mercies, she didn't fancy unburdening herself to her friend with them listening and throwing in smart-arsed comments.

She was barely halfway through her eggs when the doorbell rang. She went to answer it, and Maisie pushed past her, grabbed her hand and headed for the kitchen with a big paper bag that clinked. Silently, she flung open the freezer compartment and thrust the bottles into it. "Not properly cold," she said.

Turning to face Carys with her hands on her hips, she looked at the tall woman standing silently in the middle of the kitchen and said, "Come on, Carys, spill. I know you well enough to know that this is big."

Carys stared at her, her eyes sparkling with tears, and her lip began to tremble. Maisie watched, saying nothing; they had been lovers, even young and inexperienced lovers, but they pretty much knew each other inside out, and Maisie knew that her best friend was hurting badly. A tear spilled out of the corner of Carys' eye, and Maisie braced herself.

The dam broke, and the tears flooded out, "Maisie... Maisie... I need a hug," Carys sobbed. Maisie's arms were around her in an instant, pulling Carys' head down to her shoulder where the big girl sobbed as if her heart was breaking. Maisie's heart wrenched, both for herself, with all her memories, but for Carys too, in so much distress. She loved the tall brunette with all her heart; she knew there would never be another person for her, but she knew that they would never, ever be a couple again. She was content to be in second place, especially now. She stood silently, hugging her dearest friend, waiting for the storm to pass.

Eventually, the sobs turned to sniffles, and Maisie grabbed some kitchen paper, took Carys by the hand and dragged her to the sofa in the living room, where she made her sit down. "Now, you big ox, wipe your eyes and blow your bloody nose. You've got tears and snot everywhere!"

Carys obediently wiped her face with the proffered paper towel. Maisie watched her silently, thinking that things were definitely not right; even a storm like that one would have typically ended in sniffly giggles at her remark. She sat down next to Carys, wrapped her arms around her and said softly: "Come on, dear one, tell me what's wrong."

The blonde girl coaxed and wheedled for half an hour before she got anything out of Carys, and even then, all she got was, in a very small voice: "Maisie, I'm a complete idiot..." with a little sob at the end. Maisie stroked her hair and softly said, "Are you going to tell me something I don't already know?" and gently kissed her cheek. Tears began to trickle down Carys' cheeks again, and suddenly, she started talking. It all poured out, the frustrations of yesterday morning, the chance meeting in the street, the spiralling feelings of failure, and the despair gnawing at her very soul, it seemed.

Maisie listened, marvelling at how her usually level-headed friend seemed to have gone totally off the rails over a chance meeting with a pretty face. This girl must be something super special to have generated that kind of reaction, unless...

"Carys, are you sure it's not your hormones? Whereabouts are you?"

"No, it's not that, definitely. I'm on the pill, and I've had periods since I threw Neil out, and I'm not due for a couple of weeks. I'm just being a total idiot, is all. I don't know why it's hit me so hard... like I said, I'm just being a total idiot, but I can't get over the fact that there seemed to be so much chemistry in just a few seconds. I've got to get it out of my system; I doubt I will ever see her again... didn't you bring some beers?"

"Ah! Shit!" yelled Maisie and rushed to the kitchen, coming back a moment later with several bottles and a couple of glasses. "Phew, good job you remembered, they have just started to freeze!"

Carys laughed shakily as Maisie opened a couple of bottles and poured them into the glasses. The ice crystals in the almost frozen beer floated to the top, and Maisie said, "WooHoo! Tooheys Slushie! Here's to brain freeze then!" and took a big gulp. Carys laughed out loud at the face that the blonde girl pulled, as Maisie hoarsely said, "Brrrr! That's more like my Carys!"

They drank slowly, Carys gradually coming out of her bottomless black pit and loosening up a little as the beers took effect. One of Carys' housemates, a short lad called Daniel, came home, clearly the worse for wear, and was firmly chased away from the remaining beers by Maisie, who snapped: "Right now, matey, our need is greater than yours, so go and do one!"

"OK, OK, Maisie!" slurred Dan, laughing, "I'll jus' go and langu... hic... ish in my bed, then."

"And," roared Maisie, "If you're going to chunder, lift the bloody seat first!"

Carys giggled, slightly tipsy by now, then said something in a whisper. "Hmm?" said Maisie, not hearing her.

"Will you stay with me tonight, Maisie?" Maisie looked taken aback as Carys continued: "Not for anything like that... I'm sorry... I just don't want to be alone tonight."

Maisie laughed shakily, "Yes, of course, you big softy, and I promise I'll keep my hands to myself!

"You're not working tomorrow, so we'll grab a lazy day at the beach, hey? Come on then, there's no more beer, so it's bedtime for teddy bears"

Carys nodded, and they gently weaved their way to Carys' room and started getting ready for bed. Maisie couldn't help sneaking a peek at her ex-lover and almost gasped at the statuesque beauty that Carys had become, so much fitter and trimmer than Maisie remembered, and she sighed, a forlorn smile on her face. They clambered into bed and pulled the covers over themselves. Carys went out like a light, and as her breathing slowed and deepened, Maisie sighed again, snuggled into the broad back of her only love, and gently fell asleep, as a single tear rolled down her cheek.

"CARYS!" Maisie's bellow startled the sleeping girl blearily awake, "My god, you'd still sleep the day away if you had the chance, wouldn't you? Come ON! I've cleared up your cold eggs, washed your plate and tidied your bomb site of a kitchen! It's almost ten o'clock, and the beach is calling!"

Carys sat up in bed, hair everywhere, rubbed her sticky eyes and grimaced. Too many tears last night. "Urghh! Maisieeee... don't shout, I've got a headache!"

"Not bloody surprised," came the retort, "All the sniffin' an' snottin' you were doing last night... oh, and all the beer..."

"Oh... was it a lot?"

"No, not really," grinned Maisie, "but it was on an almost empty stomach, so I've brought you a glass of water and some coffee to go with these paracetamols." As Carys reached for them, the sheet fell away from her shoulders, and the blonde girl's eyes widened momentarily. "Good grief!" she thought, "Those are really something!"

Carys realised what was causing her friend's sudden distraction and said, in a small voice, "Sorry, love," as she pulled the sheet back up.

Maisie laughed, sat down on the edge of the bed, and gently put her arms around Carys. "It's OK, babe, I don't mind. I've got used to the idea now. I was just surprised by how much you've changed for the better over the last few years. You are quite the eyeful now!"

"Thanks, Maisie... for cheering me up last night, for just being there for me, for just being you."

Maisie tightened her arms, pulled the big brunette towards her and kissed her tenderly on the cheek: "Carys, I love you, I've always loved you, you know that, and I know things will never be as they were after we left school... doesn't make my feelings for you any less. I don't want to see you get hurt. I don't like seeing you hurting, and trust me, I have always, always got your back!"

Two sets of blue eyes stared into each other, brimming with tears for a long time. Then, Maisie sniffed noisily, wiped her eyes with the back of her hand and said, with a wide grin: "If we don't get a move on, the sun will have gone down! Go and get in the shower while I put some bits and bobs together."

Carys took a big breath, grabbed at the sheet as it threatened to fall off again, then laughed as she realised she would have to let go of it when she got out of bed anyway, and dropped it. Maisie giggled, and with only half-faked lechery said: "Phwoar! Will you look at that!"

Carys laughed, still not the guffaw that Maisie remembered, "but it's a start," she thought. While Carys showered, Maisie busied herself packing things for the beach, and when she emerged, Carys grabbed a red bikini that covered precious little when she had fastened it on... "Ahh... what the hell!", grovelling around in the back of the wall cupboard, she found a red Santa Claus hat which she dragged out and banged on the cupboard door to get the dust out.

She waved it at Maisie before placing it over her chestnut mop, "Well, it IS Christmas after all! Come on, let's go swimming!"

Maisie looked at her archly, "First time I've ever seen a Santa hat on a bird's nest! Go and brush your bloody hair, girl; you look like a hangover on legs! I'll get the stuff into the car while you do!"

Shortly afterwards, the two pulled out of the small driveway and headed seawards. "Better wind the window down, Carys; the AC is still crook," said Maisie. "I hope there's a parking space under a tree so it doesn't turn into a furnace!

"Why don't you get it fixed then, Maisie?" asked Carys curiously. She knew Maisie earned pretty good money working in the bank, much more than she did at the surf shop. She couldn't even afford a car!

"Ugh... always something else that needs to be paid for..." Maisie was about to add "... and living on your own isn't cheap," but thought it probably wasn't the most tactful thing to say to her friend when she seemed to be so fragile at the moment. "Maybe next month, when I get paid."

She swung the car into a space near the Life Saving Club, squinting at the few trees around, trying to estimate which would throw a shadow on the car later. She could see that there were already a group of their friends occupying one of the big picnic tables with their integral umbrellas, and the two girls piled out and headed across. The crackle of a freshly lit barbecue and the clink and rattle of bottles in an ice-filled cooler greeted them, along with shouts of greeting and welcome as they were spotted.

Carys seemed to come out of her shell, Maisie was pleased to note, once she had some food inside her and a bit of good company, and as the morning became afternoon, she seemed to be almost back to her old bubbly, carefree self. Maisie dragged her off to the water along with some of the others, and there was much shrieking and laughing as the group enjoyed the sun, hurling water at each other and doing their best to get each other soaked! Not that it really mattered; it was so hot, they were dry again in minutes.

Heading back to the table for more beers, Maisie asked Carys, "Have you got sunblock on? I don't remember seeing you put any on."

"Um... I don't know, I don't remember either," said Carys, puzzled. She was usually so conscientious about protecting her skin that she wondered why she had forgotten.

"Come on, ox," laughed Maisie, "sit down, and I'll put some on your shoulders at least."

Carys obediently sat at the table while Maisie smeared sun cream across her back and shoulders. Suddenly, she went utterly rigid! "What's up?" asked Maisie anxiously, leaning over to look at her friend. Carys was staring fixedly at something across the other side of the Life Saving Club; her hand was over her mouth, her eyes wide in shock.

Maisie looked in the direction her friend was staring, but all she could see were the people milling about on the walkway. A small gap in the throng, and Maisie noticed a very small girl leaning on the railings; she had a big, wide-brimmed hat on, and Maisie smiled at the ridiculous plastic sunflower stuck jauntily into the hatband. The thing that caught her eye, though, was the girl's hair. There was so much of it! A gorgeous dark auburn that flowed in waves from under that silly tourist hat, tumbling down her back and over her shoulders, past her waist, and on. Maisie was sure that if she stood up straight, it would be almost to the back of her knees!

"Woweeeee!" she gasped, "will you look at that girl's hair? My God, I bet that takes some looking after, but, Jeez, I'd die to have hair like that!"

Carys seized Maisie's hand in a vice-like grip and stuttered: "M... M... Maisie... th... that's her! Oh God, what am I going to do?"

Maisie's heart sank; she dreaded another episode like last night if things ended up going wrong, but she knew what she had to do for her dearest friend. She would have to push her into someone else's arms... because that's what friends do for each other.

She put on a brave smile and went and knelt in front of Carys, who was still staring at the tiny girl: "You get off your big backside and go and speak to her, you great idiot! If there is chemistry like you think there is, then you will be fine... no, better than fine. Now get up, you big ox, before you lose her again!"

She stood up and pulled at Carys' hand. She hadn't a snowball's chance in hell of actually moving the big girl, but it was enough to galvanise Carys into standing up. As Carys started to walk towards the redhead, Maisie slapped her bottom and said, laughingly, "Go get'm, Tiger."

The smile slipped as she watched Carys hurry away, and a tiny tear dropped to the dusty ground. Then, she turned abruptly and almost ran to her car.

Carys rushed through the crowd of people, eyes firmly fixed on the small girl, desperate to get to her quickly in case she disappeared again. She stopped about two metres away and said the first thing that came into her head, but as she said it, she cringed... "Oh. My. GOD! Is that the best I can come up with? I'm going to sound like a complete idiot! Did I actually say that?"

"Hello! How's your lovely bottom after that bump the other day?"