The Gamer's Gambit Pt. 09

GAME CONTINUE Date: March 27th, 21XX Location: Lord Shellie's Fortress High Score: 1,628,520 Top High Score: 3,333,360

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Lord Shellie's fortress stands as a testament of power and boldness. Its whitestone brick contrasted with the burnt nature of the volcano top, and its proximity to such danger spoke of the lord's confidence. It is considered one of the most difficult places to enter. You'd have to be a mad lad or lass to even try.

A river of magma surrounds the fortress like a moat. A drawbridge connected the end of a pathway to the fortress. Patrols of shellies, chumps, bobs, and billies stuck to a tight shift to guard the perimeter. They were stationed throughout the fortress, along the battlements, and out near cliff faces. Lackatoes hovered near corners, their cameras rolling. The security feeds were overseen from a command center within the fortress.

With all that in mind, Lord Shellie found himself comfortable. In one of the top rooms of the fortress, the large shellie fit himself in a white tuxedo. His spiky shell punctured the back of the tuxedo. The room had the accommodations of a high-end dressing room. Grand displays of furniture and bright chandeliers gave the place a noble feel. Lord Shellie used a vanity mirror to adjust the bowtie under his gullet.

"Ah, what a day to be married. You are so very fortunate, my lord," a cranky, elderly voice said from above. There were licks of sarcasm and fear in their tone.

"Right you are, Cammy," Lord Shellie practiced his smile. His draconic row of teeth gleaned in the light. He glanced up at Cammy, who hung in a tangled mess of ropes. The ropes pulled and tugged on her body, BDSM-style. She had a mix of discomfort and eroticism to her expression. Lord Shellie whimsically sighed, "Persica will finally be my wife. Gamer is too busy playing at the resort to stop us. My troops haven't reported anything amiss. Ah, what a day, what a day."

"Yes, my lord. You are very fortunate, my lord," Cammy rained appraisal. She swung a little as she wiggled, the ropes squeezing her voluptuous body.

"I've noticed a change in Persica, though," Lord Shellie meandered over to a window. He cast his gaze to the horizon, "She's more... lively. More opinionated. For as long as I've known her, she's been a quiet, drug-addled moneygrabber. The perfect woman..."

"An astute observation... hah... my lord," Cammy crowed.

"Bah, the sooner we're married, the sooner we'll be back to the status quo. Once I have control of her and Chanterelle, the sky's the limit. Then, I'll conquer the stars!" Lord Shellie fluttered out of the room. The taut ropes ached as Cammy wheezed with ecstacy.

"He's so hot..." Cammy whimpered.

Lord Shellie stomped down the hallway. Every few portraits were just Lord Shellie striking a cool or badass pose. It reminded Lord Shellie that Lord Shellie was the best in the land. Far better than his troops, who were mysteriously not patrolling the halls or outside on the battlements. After spanning a hallway and hanging a right, he slowed to a stop in front of an opulent door. Its gaudy doorframe marked its importance.

Lord Shellie waited in the silence and listened. He heard the low murmur of Princess Persica on the other side. He hadn't seen her since last night. Kammy and Qammy were tasked in suiting her up with a bride's gown.

"Oh, my sweet peach, it'd be wrong of me to enter and see you before the wedding," Lord Shellie blushed. He tapped his nails together bashfully, "I can't possibly peep. But, then again, I wouldn't be a good villain if I followed the rules... bwah hah hah!"

Lord Shellie gingerly opened the door and peeked his snout into Persica's room. As expected, she wore a gorgeous wedding dress. It swooshed to the side like a mermaid's tail, and revealed much of a garter-strapped leg. The corset hugged her torso. She bore her shoulders, and had on elbow long gloves. Instead of a veil, large white flowers accessorized her dreads, and the petals draped over her face. Makeup dolled her up with vivid colors.

What ruined the scene and flabbergasted Lord Shellie were the two knocked out shellie mages. They were sprawled over the vanity couch like wet towels. In front of Persica was Gamer, who fiddled with buckling up his jeans.

"It's not my fault somebody sabotaged my zipper and my penis conveniently flops out," Gamer responded defensively to Persica.

"I bet you're the one who sabotaged it," Persica crossed her arms.

"Moi?!" Gamer's overdramatized the accusation.

"What is the meaning of this?!" Lord Shellie barged in. Gamer and Persica both jumped at the irate dragon.

"Aaah!!" Gamer screamed, pulled out his magnum, and shot Lord Shellie. The thunderous bang caused Persica to flinch ans cover her ears. The bullet pinged and deflected off the lord's chest. Lord Shellie was unmoved and perplexed by the ineffectiveness.

"Gamer! What was that?" Persica asked.

"I fired a warning shot... at his heart," Gamer narrowed his eyes.

"Enough!" Lord Shellie approached. "I want to know exactly how you got past all my defenses without raising an alarm."

Gamer grinned, "Oh ho, sit back and grab some popcorn..."

***

After we had seen the Illuminati sign over the fortress, we decided to rest for the night. We were tuckered out after the race that I totally won. Asterion and Sonia logged out, and Minnie and I found our hut.

The next morning, I awoke to birds chirping, a beautiful sunrise, and two soft turtle titties pressed into me. I did my morning routine of stretches, inventory check, and gooch massage. By the time I was done, Minnie had fully awakened. We went over how to tackle the fortress, and she was puzzled by a word I used.

"What does defenestrate mean?" Minnie asked.

I promptly hucked myself out the window. I rolled across the sand and popped back to my feet. Minnie rushed out, and I explained, "You defenestrate people by throwing them out windows. You can self-defenestrate yourself to grow distance between you and enemies. Useful against hordes of zombies."

"Oh, cool! There's plenty of windows on the fortress. I'll do my best to defenestrate," Minnie promised. With the vocabulary session out of the way, we departed from the beach and headed into the resort.

There were no signs of lingering life, be it NPC or player. I felt relatively safe. Of course, it was all ruined when we got near the kart building and saw the flaming head of Sweet Cheeks, or Sweet Teeth... whatever his name is - I can't remember thanks to how scared I was. I saw him shaking hands with Asterion. Our favorite minotaur decided to go with a new skin today. He resembled one of those highland cows, with the shaggy haircut that covered his eyes. His clothes looked Greek, with a garment that only hung over one shoulder and then draped like a skirt. I barely picked up what they were saying to one another.

"Thanks again for all your help. We couldn't do it without you, bud," Asterion said with his sexy, heavy voice.

"Did you see the news yesterday?" the psycho clown asked.

"About Marathon and the race results? Yeah, it's bringing a lot of attention to this game."

"Which means more attention on you and Gamer. I've heard on the rumor mill that Dimitri is speaking out against your actions."

I did not recognize the name drop, but it appeared to fluster Asterion, "Great..."

"Watch your back, Asterion. That boy of yours is a greedy one," and after that ominous warning, Sweet Guy logged out.

My paralysis lifted and I moved over to Asterion, "Whaddup, Asterion? You're on early."

"Good morning, Asterion!" Minnie squeaked.

Our greeting jolted Asterion from his mental conundrum, "Morning, Gamer, Minnie. Yeah, things are crazy out in the real world. I figured I'd be the mailman and deliver the news."

"Mailman, eh? You got a special package for me?" I teased the big guy.

It helped chip more of his stress off, "Tch, maybe later. Right now, though, you should know that your bounty has been revoked."

"Revoked?"

"Isn't that good?" Minnie asked.

"You would think, but I have no idea. The raid idea and race failed to knock Gamer off his pedestal. The Game Masters and the council must be contemplating their next move," Asterion figured. "The quest to kill Gamer is gone, and from what online forums have put out, no more players will be invited to join Chanterelle."

"Scaredy-cats!" I insulted the gods of this world. "I rejoin the Million Point Club, it's how I is, and this is how they react?"

"How are you here, Asterion?" Minnie's ignorance of the real world was evident.

"Anybody with the invite code can still join, but I suspect anyone who witnessed the ass-whooping from yesterday will think twice about coming back."

"Sō janai to omoun dakedo. I only needed to think once," a feisty voice said from behind me. We all turned to see Sonia. Her outfit this time was a blue tank top, stretchy black pants that hugged the right amount, and one of those beanies that looked like an animal. Hers was a wolf, and the two flaps that hung from the side were its arms and paws. I sensed her furry energy and was too confused to understand, and too lazy to care.

"Wait, who's Sonia?" Persica interrupted my incredible storytelling. The audacity of this bitch.

Persica and Lord Shellie sat on the couch in the center of the room. Kammy and Qammy were pushed to the floor to make more space. Lord Shellie shared beers and popcorn as they listened to Gamer's recant.

"She's from our world. Energetic, cute, always trying to one up me. Now..." Gamer proceeded with the story.

Anyways, as I was saying, Sonia approached the group. Which put my guard up immediately, "Back so soon? Jumping at the chance to rechallenge me now that there's no competition?"

"Your bounty is revoked. Even if half your current high score would be great to earn, it'd be a headache and a half just to deal with you. I'm here for my own reasons," Sonia played with her beanie's paws.

"For Marathon?" Asterion guessed.

"I can clarify that for you," another voice materialized behind Asterion. We all turned our attention to two modern businessmen who logged in. One was an old cue ball, and the other was a dorky four-eyes.

"Am I just a problem magnet?" I demanded answers. Asterion and Minnie solemnly nodded at me, and I shrugged at their quiet honesty.

"Mr. Segan, the vice president of Marathon, and Nathaniel, one of the Game Masters of Chanterelle," Sonia introduced. The moment she mentioned Nathaniel's occupation, he had my undivided attention. He had on a wry smile, and nodded at my acknowledgement.

"We were hoping you'd show up soon, Sonia. We would have preferred doing this in person, but your immediate termination is necessary for our public image. Due to your actions from yesterday, you are officially no longer an affiliate of Marathon," Mr. Segan informed.

"Yeah, you made that clear yesterday morning," Sonia embraced the firing.

"Welcome to soloing!" Asterion stayed jovial. "Release the balloons!"

Minnie took out one balloon and released it into the air. It floated away with little grandiose. She shrugged, "That's all I had."

Sonia appreciated the acceptance. I, on the other hand, found the public display of douchebaggery curious, "Why bother even coming on here, then? You trying to make a show of force?"

"Something of the sort," Nathaniel crossed his hands behind his back.

"More of a verbal reprimanding, then anything. Sonia purposely went against the association's wishes. Such insubordination is intolerable in our workplace," Mr. Segan grumbled.

"You're just rubbing salt in the wound. Are you that petty?" Asterion argued. I agreed, and opened and closed my fly over and over in a show of my own force. That's when my zipper broke. I cursed under my breath and tried to fiddle it back on.

"I am. We at Marathon have built a successful community over decades of work," Mr. Segan practically growled. The more he furrowed his brow, the more I saw a bulldog talking, "Shade and Sonia were our lead figures. I won't even get started on how Gamer puts a fat, disgusting stain on gaming with his crimes and attitude, but my employees know to act better. To be better."

"The best; most Marathon followers would say," Sonia smugly said.

Mr. Segan zeroed in his poison, "You are such a disappointment. We had high aspirations for you, and you toss it away?! Stupid! Naive!"

Sonia withheld her emotions, but couldn't help sneering at the jerk, "If you can't handle the fast lane, move aside. I don't need to be judged by a poser like you. Kanarazu katsu!"

Mr. Segan barked a laugh, "We made you, Natsuki. Without us, you'd still be pulling in low numbers and ratings. We handed you success!"

His words started to upset Sonia. He must have noticed, because he droned on, "And let me tell you, you'll never be accepted by another association. I can make damn sure of..."

I blew Mr. Segan. I forcibly made my way over to the cue ball and pulled down his pants. His middle-aged cock flopped out and I performed the Moonlight Serenade on his clarinet. I didn't care how he felt; I wasn't going to let him speak down to people without repercussions.

"Woah, wait..." Lord Shellie and Persica were shocked at the twist. "You gave this guy a blowjob?"

Gamer slapped his forehead, "Oh, geez, no! That's not... I flubbed up. I didn't mean I blew him, I meant to say I blew him away. With this."

Gamer reintroduced to them the firearm. Persica and Lord Shellie were able to understand, "Oooh!"

"Sorry, rewind it back," Gamer swirled his index fingers in a cycle.

"And let me tell you, you'll never be accepted by another association. I can make damn sure of..."

I pulled out the Desert Eagle and put a bullet between the asshole's eyes. His head snapped back before digitizing instantly. I blew him away.

"Gamer!" Sonia gasped. Nathaniel reacted like a normal human being and gawked with his mouth and eyes. He put a fist up to his lips, and stifled some laughter.

"I was close to doing something myself," Asterion said, apparently at the same level of disgust I was at. Minnie had moved into a fighting stance, ready to rumble.

"I'm sorry, but I can't hear you over the sound of how mad I am right now!" I told everybody. I pointed my magnum at Nathaniel. He clamped his mouth shut and held up his hands. I asked, "What are you going to say to piss me off?"

"Nothing! A-actually, me and some of the Game Masters have come to enjoy your antics. We find your chaos fun! It's nice," Nathaniel pleaded with his hands.

I lowered my gun, but kept my glare strong and smoldering, "Answer our questions, then."

"Certainly!"

"Who the hell designs the enemies in Chanterelle? They must have played monster sim for too long and let the intrusive thoughts take control."

Nathaniel flashed a smirk, "Ah, well, that would be Herbert. The council gave us little time for adequate quality checks. Chanterelle is primarily designed for you to suffer for eternity. So, it's whatever came out of his noggin."

"Herbert..." I knew who my greatest enemy was.

"What about his bounty quest being cancelled? You or the council's idea?" Asterion wondered.

"The council's. They were adamant on not feeding anymore points to Gamer. You've thrown them for a loop," Nathaniel praised me.

"So what's the plan now?" I asked.

Nathaniel gazed up at Lord Shellie's fortress. He brought our attention to the Illuminati marker, "The council is asking us to throw everything at you. Math it out so you don't exceed three million points, but make it hard as all hell."

"Smart, but that's still a lot of points," Sonia admitted.

"Honestly, I'm excited," Nathaniel breathed carefully. It was as if he was trying to hold back excitement, "Will you be able to pull off another upset? What will the council do with another failure? The world is revolving, and I can't wait to see what happens next."

"Alright, alright, you're starting to be weird. Head out before I oopsies you like I did the Segan guy," I could care less what the world thought.

Nathaniel nodded, thanked us, and dipped out. I flipped the magnum a few times like a cool ocelot cat before putting it back in my inventory. Sonia asked me, "Why did you shoot Mr. Segan?"

"He's beneath you," I kept it simple. Sonia liked the response, but I was hooked on what Nathaniel said, "So, defeating Lord Shellie and whatever the Illuminati are planning won't earn me enough points."

"That's not a real concern," Asterion toiled with one of his bangs. "If we get Persica back, we'll have access to the stars."

"Let's rescue the princess!" Minnie jumped.

"Ditto! It's time to scale a volcano," I slapped my hands together and rubbed. I recalled Persica saying that the kart track led up to the fortress. Yet I hadn't seen a way up during the race. I knew right then and there, Persica had lied to me.

"Excuse me?" Persica sliced a glare into Gamer.

"That's slander. We should sue," Lord Shellie advised with a mouthful of popcorn.

"Okay, okay, it's possible we missed a turn going at one hundred miles an hour. But - and it's a big butt - that doesn't change the fact we didn't know where to go," Gamer shrugged.

"Then how did you get here?"

As I was saying... well, actually, it was Sonia who did the saying, "Mind if I join you?"

My squad and I collectively wondered, "Why?"

"You knocked me out of the Million Point Club. I need to get my score back up. If Nathaniel spoke the truth, then there's going to be plenty of pickings for all of us. I bet I can reach Lord Shellie before you. Competition makes everything better," Sonia sold.

"Hmm, I dunno..." I utilized skepticism. Even if I didn't have to worry about her stabbing me in the back, I voiced my concern, "You're actually competent. That just makes it harder for me to get the wish."

"I'll share my french fries with you," Sonia held up a cup of sticked potatoes.

"God McDammit, you're in!" I couldn't refuse such a sublime offer. We dapped and I acquired the ambrosia.

"You're hopeless..." Asterion sighed.

He was obviously jealous. I needed to help my buddy by distracting him with a question, "Is the Rapsutin still in working order?"

Asterion nodded, but suggested, "Why don't we just fly up there? From what Sweet Heart told me, they are still functional. It'll be easier than driving."

"They'll see us coming if we fly," Minnie brought up the cons. "The fort will be heavily protected, and the moment they see us coming, they'll rain spears, bobs, and billies at us."

"Which is why we dive in hot and fast," Sonia used her hands to insinuate the plan. "It'll be like throwing a flashbang in SWAT. Don't give the enemy a chance to shoot, and you won't get shot."

"Your logic is sound, but what about an escape plan if things fall apart?" Asterion asked.

"My life is too interesting for escape plans. Just don't get hit, gozonji no tōri," Sonia said matter-of-factly.

Minnie said, "If I can get my hands on a blue shell, I'll be set. Nothing would be able to hurt me."

All eyes fell on me. I contemplated the pros and cons. I had to carefully consider everything. A single mistake meant the end of it all. The plane idea was reckless, dangerous, and insane. I'd never flown a plane before, in or out of video games.

So we totally did that shit.

We took to the air expecting some ace combat. The planes were rudimentary, but operational. Asterion struggled with his plane, and I blame the control's shitty reverse steering. I'm pretty sure it was that and not the crappy, burping mess his plane sounded like halfway up the mountain. Because the moment we arrived, that dude just nosedived into the fortress wall.

Sonia, that adrenaline junkie, did a bunch of tricks in the plane around the fortress tops. We expected to be attacked, but nothing was there. No enemies, no turrets, no quick-time events - nada. Thus, Sonia did some speedrunner shit where she launched herself from the plane and through a window. Her plane crashed into the fortress wall.

"Eeeee!" Minnie screamed as she spiraled and crashed into the fortress wall. I think... I think she just wanted to copy the others. I don't remember anything going wrong for her... no... no, yeah, I think that's it...

And there I was, the lone survivor of the Battle of Lord Shellie's Fortress, separated from my team. The fate of our mission to save Persica fell on my dependable shoulders. Funny enough, I hadn't noticed the lackatoe leaving for the day, "Ah, this party's getting crazy. I can see why all my kin left. I hope Lord Shellie understands I have to feed my gulp gulp. Hold on, Mr. Beans, I'm..."

My plane shred the fucker to pieces, and caught fire. Classic vehicle rules; hit it enough and the whole thing catches on fire. I bailed from the plane just as it exploded.

I pulled out my flying broom and slowed my rapid descent. I could safely lower myself to the fortress courtyard. Unfortunately, as I switched to my broom, my french fries slipped out of my grasp. They tumbled to their death below. I screamed, "My french fries!"

I lunged down for them, missed, and careened into the fortress wall.

"You were holding the fries the whole time?!" Persica and Lord Shellie couldn't believe it.

They were obviously jealous. I had crashed into a long hallway. Portraits, mainly of Lord Shellie, lined the walls, a runner carpet covered the floor, and the sound of moans echoed throughout the fortress. Many hee's, many hoo's. As I recovered and deliberated any door or hall end to round, I picked up intercourse batter splats coming from the nearest room. I listened in from behind the door, like the perv I am, and heard flesh on flesh action.

"Excuse me..." a voice said from behind me. I spun around to see a confused male shellie. He wore a blue shell and held a spear, but he was haggard. Sweat dampened his skin. Regardless, he confronted me, "Are you one of the new guests here for the wedding?"

"Yes," I was a paragon of honesty.

"I heard a big bang, and not the kind being made by my fellow shellies. I see this hole in the wall, and I'm certain it wasn't there previously. Before I invite you to one of our many celebratory orgies, do you know what happened?" this shellie spoke far more sophisticatedly than previous shellies. Almost like a butler - I suspected Lord Shellie had the highest quality soldiers wear the blue shell.

Again, my honesty knew no equal, "I did that. It's how I entered the fortress."

"My word! You're a guest and you bring destruction to Lord Shellie's property? You are no longer invited to our sex group, or the wedding! I will have to maim you for this!" the haggard shellie readied his weapon.

I put my hands up and tried to reason with the universal handshake, "Blowjob?"

"Wah?" I saw hesitation in the shellie's eyes. His spear lowered a bit, but he became critical, "N-no! Not from a stranger! You must die!"

"Well, I mean, the alternative is the vocabulary word of the day," I informed him.

"What vocabulary word?"

"Defenestrate!" I punted the shellie. He flew like a football through one of the hallway's windows. Close one; having Sonia, executives, and now enemies sneak up behind me made me feel exposed. I texted Samira, "Oi! Are you here yet? I need my spidey sense."

No response. My gut twisted with concern, but there was nothing I could actually do but wait. I sighed, and noted what the shellie said, "Orgies, huh? We can get down and dirty with those once Persica is saved. There's nothing like a post-victory orgy after the downfall of a tyrant king."

I checked a few rooms along the hallways and antechambers I travelled through. Not all were filled with hot and heavy action. Some were storage, bathrooms, or barracks. Others were narrow passageways of trap walls and spinning spike traps.

I made sure to take my time and check behind any door that echoed sexual fever. The amount of turtle dong and puntang I saw could last me multiple lifetimes. If there were ever more than two, it was a gangbang. If it was a solo show, they'd be fingering all their holes.

I found an antechamber that connected two hallways with arches. There were a couple standing lamps and paintings that decorated one side of the antechamber. A cushy sofa and end table were on the other side - and a robed lady struggled with her garments at the sofa. The robe was very nun-like, and hugged her figure. The babe had a booty, and the robe rode the asscrack. I couldn't tell what she looked like due how her robes and gloves covered her skin. She wore a gas mask, too, and it obscured me out of her sight.

My dick started to point to the nun from within my pants, and it eventually slipped out due to the broken zipper. He'd never led me wrong before, and I trusted his guidance. However, footsteps alerted me to the other hallway. A bunch of people were marching into the antechamber. I jumped behind one of the lamps, which was conveniently Gamer-shaped.

Five chumps stepped into the antechamber. Their muscles bulged against the bracers, collars, and belts strapped to them. Their leather outfits sounded like a BDSM convention. They picked up on the struggling nun. Their eyes flashed with the Illuminati triangle, and devious grins crossed their faces.

The five chumps surrounded the nun. Their hands rubbed the bulges in their pants. The nun kneeled onto the sofa and finally got her outfit on properly. Her muffled voice seemed so enthusiastic, "Oh, finally! Now I can run around and not get into any trouble. Yippee!"

She turned on her knees and saw the massive, dark figures looming over her. The group released their cocks and allowed them to stretch out towards her. Some were pierced, and a couple had spiky straps hugging the base. They stared at her with thirst. The nun blushed through her gas mask, "Ah, man, I immediately found trouble!"

"Hey, there, little lamb. You seem a bit lost. We can help you out... after you help us out," one of the chumps stroked his Prince Albert cock right in front of her mask.

"Um, I'm okay, actually. I just got done with a hootin' good time. That's how I got this outfit... I knocked a lady out with my tongue!" the nun said chipperly.

"You hear that, boys? We have ourselves a thief," another chump tickled the tip of his member. The shaft flexed against the cock restraint.

"That behavior deserves punishment..." one of the chumps nudged the nun sideways with ease. He then slapped her across the ass. She yelped and clutched the spot. The five chumps gathered side-by-side and allowed their cocks to hang over the nun in a row.

"I... oh, boy, that's a lot... uh, I can't. I'm sorry," the nun tried to wiggle away, but the chump closest to her face smacked the mask with his dong. It made her pause and gasp.

"Nah, as Lord Shellie's top dogs, I think we know what's best. Trust me, you'll end up liking this..." the chump tapped his cock on the mask's eyes. Four pairs of hands rocked the nun as they groped and felt her up. She gasped and breathed more heavily under the mask, and seized up as the rigid members pressed into her side and legs. The chump at her head pointed at another, "Hit the lights."

His buddy nodded and reached over to the lamp. He flicked my dick like a switch. My grunt and the fact the light remained on made the chumps pause. My stiffy twanged like a doorstop.

I had to roleplay to maintain my stealth, "Click."

"Who's there?!" the chumps became defensive.

I grabbed the lamp and swung it into the face of the closest chump. They crumbled to the floor, and then I readied the lamp like a polearm weapon, "Consent is key, assholes! Get away from her and nobody gets hurt."

The two chumps closest to the lamp bit forward with shark-like veracity. They tore the lamp's bottom off and left me with a broken weapon.

I gulped, "Heh heh... be gentle..."

The chumps and their swaying cocks closed in on me. The nun reached under her cloth with one hand and pulled it out with a boxing shell equipped. She jumped and bonked two chumps in the back of the head. They hit the floor unconscious, and it alerted the other two. With the distraction, I launched from my position. I dropkicked the remaining chumps and sent them into a wall. They slumped over onto each other in a precarious, sixty-nine pile. I landed next to the nun.

"Gamer!" the nun exclaimed.

The excitement and the boxing shell confirmed it for me. The nun pulled her hood back and removed the gas mask. It was Minnie!

"Minnie? What are you doing in that getup?" I asked. She instantly hugged me, before answering.

"Oh, after I landed in the fortress, I started looking for a blue shell. I toured an orgy, but they didn't have any. One of the ladies there threw this into the corner, though, and I figured a disguise was needed if I wanted to roam freely. A shellie without a shell is just a lie," Minnie smiled sweetly.

"Look at you, changing your costume to fit the new story beat. You really are coming to life," I was so proud. She even sexed her way to success. Makes a man wanna cry...

"I learned from the best!" Minnie saluted. "But it's odd. No matter how much sex the orgy had, nobody was allowed to finish."

"Really?"

"Yeah, if anybody came, they'd be killed. The others talked about how they needed to grow their powers and not cum. Only to edge," Minnie tapped her foot and tilted her head.

"Samirapedia, to the rescue!ヾ(＾∇＾)" a text box popped up in front of me.

"Ah, hey, there you are. Late start for you. Is everything okay?" I inquired.

"Yezzir!" was all I got. I wanted to roll an insight check, but not being able to see her face made it impossible. She continued, "I did some research, though. The Biforce is more complex than Minnie made it out to be. It doesn't just control bisexuals; it can mentally manipulate anybody torn between two things. In other words, it preys on the indecisive. That makes Goonindorf the ultimate rizzler!"

"And to a population of shellies who are always split between horniness and dutifulness..." I saw the issue.

"Bingo! It's more like hypnosis, rather than mind control (´_ゝ`) It won't make you sussy unless you are already inclined to be. Which, for most people, puts them in a greater binding than Isaac," Samira simplified.

"Wait a minute," Lord Shellie interrupted and jumped up from the couch. He marched out onto the balcony and glanced skyward. He saw the Biforce marker, "When did the Biforce get there?"

"You guys haven't noticed? It's been there since yesterday," Gamer informed.

"That's impossible... it means Goonindorf has returned," Persica stressed on the idea. She pulled out a joint and favored it, "But why is he in Chanterelle?"

"My troops haven't reported anything... I don't like this," Lord Shellie glared at the battlements. Just as in Gamer's bizarre adventure story, they were vacant of reinforcement.

"Great, guys, but may I continue? I'm almost finished," Gamer didn't get this far to leave things unfinished. Unlike that goon dork. Lord Shellie took his place next to Persica, who offered him her substance. He declined with agitation, and Persica pouted. Gamer continued...

"Hypnosis? Edging? Sounds like the Illuminati to me," my thoughts went to the marker and Shade. The dark clouds still lingered when we arrived. I switched to Minnie, "Let's find Persica and the others, and then we'll worry about the shitstorm."

"Okie dok! I still want to find a blue shell, though. My defense will be impenetrable if I can get one."

"I don't typically like this, but do you want to split up? You're obviously capable enough to be on your own. You can hunt a blue shell, and I'll find our friends."

"Sure, but be careful, this place is as confusing as Ouija's Mansion!" Minnie giggled at the crazy memories they made.

"Yeah... wait a minute..." I recalled an ability I had, discovered in the mansion. My eyes locked onto a painting of a kitchen.

"Gamer?" I barely heard Minnie, since my mind was set.

"Cartwheel!" I sprang at the picture. Minnie's farewell was cut off as I entered the picture like splashing into a pool. After the initial shift in dimensions, and a voice saying "mock pickle", I tumbled out into an apartment living room. I knocked over the television in the process and crashed onto the coffee table. A couple snuggling on the couch jumped to their feet and screamed.

"What the hell?!" the man, a taller gentleman with baggy clothes and dabbed in cologne, yelled out. The woman wore dark pants and a black crop top, along with a beanie ordained with a Pokeball symbol. The man seemed aggressive, "Who are you?! Where did you come from?!"

I, a bit discombobulated, stood up and brushed the broken table pieces from my body. The man moved over towards the wall to look up at the poster of a video game with a fortress. He searched for the hole I didn't come through. I saw him lined up with the kitchen window.

"Talk, asshole!" the man disliked my silence. I disliked his attitude.

"Defenestrate!" I kicked. The man folded like a lawn chair and exited the building.

"Derrick!" the woman cried out and ran to the window.

"With that face... you know I had to do it to him," I turned, and used my customization options to momentarily put on a polo and khaki shorts. I then spotted a bottle of pink pills on the kitchen counter.

"Derrick!" the woman cried down to the street below, where a car alarm echoed from. She turned to me, distraught, but I vaulted over the couch and nabbed the power up. I saw another picture in the front of the apartment, with a bunch of turtles in the ocean. The woman screamed, "Who are you?!"

I ignored her, pocketed the drugs, dove into the picture, and gave a lil toot goodbye. Samira gave the fart a reverb effect. After transitioning to a different plane of existence, I rolled out onto the floor of an austentatious room. A few resting furniture, gaudy interior design and rugs, more unbearable portraits of Lord Shellie, and a vanity dominated the room. An incredible balcony door led out to a perch where one could appreciate the beauty of Chanterelle. Here, with her eyes cast to the sky, was Princess Persica. She wore nothing but a pink, see-through nightgown. It draped at the arms, and stopped at the knees. She was bare beneath it all. Her succulent booty greeted me first.

Persica turned at my arrival, and gasped. She glanced about and approached me. She seemed concerned somebody would notice. She whispered to be safe, "Gamer! How did you get here?"

"Ho ho, sit back and relax, princess. Let me regale you," I grinned.

***

It all started that morning...

"No, Gamer, time is of the essence. Somebody could come in any second now," Persica interrupted the inception story.

"Well, excuse me, princess!" I said with an annoying tone. She remained adamant, and I sighed and surrendered. It'd only make things complicated. Persica seemed more flustered than usual. Highly stressed, "Is everything okay with you? Did he hurt you at all?"

My eyes explored her. I saw no bruises or cuts, but our time apart did make me find her allure all the more powerful. Her teardrop breasts, exotic hairstyle, and nobility-tier posturing were a deadly combo for any man.

"Me? Yes, but of course. I am in my boos protection. Nothing bad comes to me when I am with him," Persica's eyes kept flicking to the entrance door. "It's just... the shellie mages are supposed to be here to tailor my wedding dress. If you haven't raised alarms yet, you can still escape."

"I came here to rescue you from Lord Shellie, not to give my blessing and hand you off. You told me how bad he was," I remembered our first meeting.

"That was... I wasn't..." Persica was at a loss for words.

"Bro, no cap, her AI is all pretzeled up," Samira informed me. "(・ω・｀) she can't see Lord Shellie as an op."

"Speak from there," I pointed at her heart, then at her head. "Not from there. It'll be a lot easier for me to know what to do if you're honest."

Persica sighed in frustration, "I've... when Lord Shellie brought me here, I thought it'd work out perfectly. With Marco gone, we could focus on diplomacy and cooperation. Unfortunately, he is undeterred from taking power and ruling with an iron fist. He ignores my requests and expression."

"You want to call somebody like that hubby?" I played the therapist.

"It's what she's always wanted!" a grating, tinnitus-inducing voice squelched from the balcony. I looked in horror as the tiny visage of the lead shrooman stepped into the room and joined us, "Hello!"

"When the hell did you get here?" I asked.

"Lord Shellie ordered him to be kidnapped from Cammy's castle, right after he took me. He wanted me to have an officiant for the shroomans here at the wedding. He's so very considerate," Persica explained.

"I'll follow Persica everywhere!" the enemy of my ears declared.

"Right... almost makes me want to leave... Persica, it's your choice in the end, but you know how I feel. If Lord Shellie doesn't respect your wishes, how is he any better than Marco?"

"I..." the torment ate away at Persica. However, the door handle jiggled and startled both of us. I jumped behind the couch and hit the floor. Persica stepped next to me, her hand at the ready to signal.

The door opened with two loud obnoxious twins cackling away. It was Kammy and Qammy.

"Well, well, well..." one of them, I can't tell, started. The snide attitude could be heard in plain text, "... are you ready to suit up for your wonderful wedding?"

"Actually, if you two don't mind, I'd like to have another night. I must emotionally fortify myself for my dream come true," Persica tried to shoo them away. At this point, I was on my hands and knees, and when I raised my sights, my nose graced Persica's nightgown. Her plump, caked up backside was right there.

"Nonsense! Lord Shellie wants the deed done today, and he will not be denied!" the old shellie quacked. They shuffled things around and called out into the hall, "Alright, boys, bring in the material. This'll take some time."

I peeked under the couch and saw the feet of shellies shuffling in with bundles of fabric. They laid them off to the side, which gave me time to ask Samira, "Hey, you mentioned my interaction with the NPCs changes them, right? How effective is that when it comes to sex?"

"Bussin!" Samira answered.

"If Persica remains indecisive, she might fall victim to the Illuminati..." I concluded. I did my own shuffling until I was right behind Persica. This was for her own good. I hoisted her nightgown up over her booty cheeks. She made a small noise and tried to gently stop me. The shellies didn't notice. I planted my face into her asscheeks.

"Mmph!" Persica grunted.

Qammy or Kammy asked, "Is everything alright?"

Persica mini-panicked, "Absolutely! It's just a lot more than I was anticipating. The fabric, that is..."

I kept my face buried between her buns. I wiggled them by shaking my head. I could feel her arm nudging me away, but I didn't let up. In fact, I couldn't even breathe.

"Oxygen!" Samira said with a British accent.

I surfaced, but moved my hands onto Persica's buns. I gripped and teased, and their jiggle turned me on. I played with their bounciness, but avoided any loud claps. I stuck my tongue out and watered her crevice. Her hand went from nudging to resting - I turned the annoyance into pleasure. She glanced over her shoulder and down to me. She had such a weakened, perverted expression.

"Gamer..." she barely whispered.

I tilted my head back and kissed at the ass. Persica wanted to moan, but stifled her breath. My tempts drew her towards me. She gradually humped backwards. My lips kissed her magnificent booty. She humped over and over, and I pecked her bottom like a woodpecker. I switched it up with licks, too, since that's what really got to her.

"Alright!" a shellie mage clapped their hands. The door shut, and only the mages remained. Persica straightened up and tried to act natural. The mage who spoke strutted over, "Let's get your measurements so we know what we're dealing with."

"I can just tell you!" Persica held a hand up to stop them. When she did, her butt smooshed into my face. I had died once again and went to heaven. Persica wavered her hips and rubbed her ass into my face, and said, "I can't allow anybody but my betrothed to touch me on my wedding day. Perish the thought!"

"Good gravy, she's too much," one of shellie mages groaned.

"Fine, whatever! Just tell us, you bimbo," I could tell at that point this was Qammy.

"30-22-36," each number came with a butt bump.

"Okay... now, conjure giant scissors!" Kammy shrieked.

"Conjure giant scissors!" Qammy parroted.

I couldn't take it anymore. I crawled under Persica's legs, flipped over, and used her hips to do a pull up. I planted my mouth and nose into her wet crotch.

"Ah!" Persica gasped.

"What is it?" Qammy snapped.

"Ah! Ah! Ah!" Persica faked a laugh, nervously. My enthusiastic tongue pets lapped over her clit and lips. She fought to hold herself together, "I find it... absolutely hilarious how stupid... you both sound. Ah! Ah!"

"Why I oughta..." Kammy started to stomp over.

"Stop! Don't let the leech get under your skin, sister," Qammy pacified. "Lord Shellie will give you the Cammy treatment."

The shellie mages retreated to the fabric and began their magic mumbo jumbo. I pulled out my own magic tricks, like making my tongue disappear, or doing ninja hand gestures on Persica's chunky cheeks. She started to pant, and lubed up my mouth. I sucked and teased the clit and made her want more. Her struggle to compose herself made it all the more satisfying with each sharp breath.

"Tada!" the shellie mages presented the wedding dress.

"Wow... that feels ama... I mean, that looks amazing. It's beautiful. Mmm, I'm so close... to the wedding, that is!" Persica's mind seemed to be short circuiting.

"Look, look, sister," Kammy lavished in the misunderstanding. "Her tiny mind is blown away by our magic. Everything pales in comparison!"

"And now for the grand finale! Come here, slut, and let us fit it to you. If you can't ve touched, we'll have to magic onto you," Qammy tapped her foot on the floor.

"Ugh, just put it down and leave. I'll try it on," Persica's princessly mask dropped for a moment. My tongue had extended all the way inside.

"Stupid. Stupid! STUPID!" Qammy snapped. "Quit being such a brat and come here. Or we'll just force it on you!"

"Insufferable..." Persica groaned and moved away from me. She corrected herself as she stepped out towards the shellie mages. I became a rug again and laid down to see under the couch. The mages huffed and puffed and did their magic. I peeked over to see Persica become cocooned. However, she did indeed look dazzling, as you already know.

"How it it?" Kammy asked and summoned a standing mirror over from the other side of the room. Persica inspected herself, but her eyes were miles away.

"It's... lovely. Thank you..." Persica folded her hands in front of her.

"Of course! Now to summon Lord Shellie and get this show on the road!" Qammy and Kammy high-fived one another.

"Not yet. Allow me some time to collect myself. This is quite emotional," Persica requested.

"The princess needs time!" the shrooman backed up his royal majesty.

"Fine, but only a snack's worth of time," the shellie mages snorted before they took their leave and slammed the door.

Persica let go of her held breath. I shot up to my feet and moved over with bated excitement. I bowed to the bride and elegantly said, "I'm gonna am a boink you."

"Gamer, we can't. Today is my wedding day. We have to respect tradition. Plus, at this point, it feels like cheating..." Persica put up a fight. Her independence was showing through. My tactics were working.

"Are you sure about that?" I asked devilishly. My cock, hardened at this point, escaped through the broken zipper. It twitched in front of the flustered princess. Her eyes and body bent slightly towards it, and her lips parsed. I knew what she wanted, "Don't let somebody make you go against your heart. Liberate your feelings! Give in to your desire!"

"You sound like a villain..."

"I am the villain. I cheat all the time."

Persica sighed and looked at the shrooman, "You're my officiant. What are your thoughts?"

"Gamer hasn't invoked Stockholm Syndrome on you, and you've been less reliant on him compared to Lord Shellie," the shrooman squawked. "It depends, princess. Do you want freedom, or reliance?"

"A bridge without support is a bridge that falls," I wisely added.

Persica reflected for a moment, and then decided, "Lord Shellie is unyielding; the perfect mirror to my father. I suppose... I'm with you, Gamer."

"Then let's make it official. It's time to cheat, baby!" I cartwheeled onto the couch. I gripped my cock at the base and massaged the shaft. Persica followed me and removed the flower accessories. She brushed her fingers along the creases and seams of her dress. My eyes absorbed her. The white gave her innocence, and contrasted with the sexy saunter. She twirled to loft her mermaid tail up. For all intents and purposes, Persica was stunning.

"How do I look?" she feigned embarrassment.

"Like a million coins," I appealed. It made her smile, and we just took each other in. My cool ass jerking away, and her glorious body edging me on.

I wiggled my cock to entice the bride. She closed her eyes for a moment, took a deep breath, and moved to her knees in front of me. She framed my cock with her jiggly cleavage.

"I'm such a bad bride," Persica batted her eyes. I nodded with a grin, and let my cock go. It plopped against her, and she took it into her gloved hands. Smooth and warm. She wrapped her lips around it. Hot and intense.

Persica energetically worked on the head. She siphoned the juice, rimmed the tip, and sucked the helm. She pressed her weight into me and entered what I could only describe as a meditative state. I helped keep her hair out of her face, and flexed harder when she tickled the right way. The longer it went, the messier it became. She used her hands to draw the precum and saliva concoction along my shaft.

She pulled me out, slobbered all over the head, and applied it on her lips like lipstick. Her eyes swirled with desire and yearning, and I fell into their pits with heated attraction. She brushed my member across her lips and cheeks. She kissed my shaft with lewd passion.

I breathed, "Damn, Persica. Making out with another man's cock on your wedding day, eh? You're such a dirty slut."

"Gamer..." Persica couldn't believe my raunchiness. It didn't stop her from kneading my length.

"It's okay. I'll make you happier than Marco or Lord Shellie ever could. Keep sucking."

Persica whimpered and took my length in. The pristine, noble princess pleasured me with her dirty mouth. She cupped my balls and forced more of my juice across her tongue.

"Yeah, that's nice. Open up," I murmured. I used my fingers to pry her mouth wider. She stuck her tongue out, covered in slippery film. I leaned forward and licked my tongue across hers, stifled her moan, and then spat into her mouth. She accepted it and swirled it around.

"Keep going," I commanded. Persica obeyed, and lost herself in the blowjob. She dragged her tongue across the bottom. It sent shivers up my spine. I controlled her verbally, but she controlled me physically.

"You might actually make me cum..." I said half-minded. Persica could break my molly curse.

Persica pulled me out. and petted her cheek with it, "Not yet. Let me enjoy this a little longer. You're so hot, and it's so hard."

"Oh yeah? Is it clearing up your thoughts?"

She finally expressed herself openly, "It does! My goodness, why does Lord Shellie have to make things so complicated? Why doesn't he listen to me?! Why can't we unite under one umbrella, instead of him leaving me on the shelf. He's regal, and fantastic, and kingly! With all the self-centeredness and pride! Ugh!"

I was taken aback by the release of stress. However, the doors swung open. Persica and I quickly covered me up with a bunch of pillows. It was haphazard, but the shellie mages didn't seem to notice.

"What is going on in here?" Qammy asked. "Why are you shouting?"

"I'm not. You're just senile," Persica said from her kneeled position.

"Why are you kneeling at the couch like that? That's not how you sit on a couch," Kammy became suspicious.

"It is. It's how princesses sit at couches," Persica winced at that one. I stifled a laugh.

"What was that noise? It sounded like a laugh!"

"Nope. It didn't. You two really are going senile..."

"Kammy, hold me back," Qammy marched forward, but her sister caught her shoulders. They warred against each other.

"Alright, ladies, time to go," the shrooman waddled over and fanned at the grannies. I forgot the little dude was... wait, was he just watching us in silence?! Anyways, it actually worked, "The Princess of Chanterelle has spoken. We will abide and grant her privacy."

The shrooman guided the mages out. When I heard the door shut, I knew it was just the princess and I.

"Phew, close one," I tossed the pillows aside. Persica's own pillows pressed into my member when she leaned forward to hide me. I slipped my fingers over her cleavage seam and tugged down. Her breasts flopped out and avalanched over me. They engulfed my length, and she used her hands to hug and tug. She controlled the titjob so that it didn't make splat noises against my abs. She kneaded and rolled my cock about. The head played peekaboo, and Persica licked the tip like a cherry lollipop. Enough of my precum made her thirsty, and she lowered her mouth to take it in. Her tit strokes came to a rest while she made out with the head. My balls flexed beneath her boobs. She quickened the head bobs and increased the suckage. She was a woman on a mission. I gasped at the head play and grunted, "Keep going, keep going..."

I pressed a hand down on her head and pushed my hips up. My pressure closed up her throat, and Persica gagged. She recoiled and coughed. My prick stood at attention, reddened and pulsating.

"Oh, peachy poo, you aren't thinking straight. You don't know what you're talking about," the princess added a growl to her voice to mock Lord Shellie. "Stop complaining. You don't have to worry about anything, sunshine."

"Sounds like an insecurity to me," Gamer raised his eyebrow.

"For real!" Persica clapped.

That's when the door opened and both Kammy and Qammy barged in. The shrooman tried holding them back, but he was completely ineffective. My prick twitched and Persica gasped.

I gave up on the stealthing, "This is totally what it looks like."

"Gamer! You dare touch Lord Shellie's betrothed?! How heinous!" Kammy sneered.

"We won't allow you to ruin his wedding day!" Qammy declared. Both mages aimed their respective magic items at me, and told Persica to move, "Step aside, princess! We'll turn him into mincemeat!"

Persica remained in the way and faced the shellies. Her breasts were on full display, and it shocked the grannies. The bride said, "You will do no harm to this man."

"What?! Why?!"

"He is my male escort," Persica declared. I wiggled my eyebrows and cock at the grannies.

"You can't be serious! Lord Shellie will never approve of this! Ridiculous!" Kammy and Qammy exploded with anger. Persica planted her fists on her hips and gave sass. The shellie mages charged in to reprimand the bride.

Samira's words of 'hypnosis' and 'indecisiveness', as well as (ㆆ ᴗ ㆆ), floated in front of my eyes. I took a chance.

I stood up, took my mighty wand in hand, and gave it a flick, "Abracadabra!"

Kammy and Qammy stuttered to a stop. Their proximity to such a healthy boner made them gawk. Disgust mixed with intrigue. I walked past Persica and stood between the two. With them in dick range, I nimbly slapped my dextrous cock across their faces, "Shazam!"

Its power knocked the grannies off their feet. They corkscrewed and landed on the couch, draped over the back like wet towels. Their asses were aimed at Persica and I.

"What should we do with them? Banging them might make them turn against Lord Shellie," I wiggled my cock at their plump butts.

"Don't bother. They are useless," Persica leered at the two. She switched to the vanity mirror and started to clean up, "We should get going, though. We must resolve things with Lord Shellie before we continue our fun."

"Damn, just when it was getting good," I sighed and pulled my pants up. However, due to the broken zipper, my cock flicked out.

The shrooman stepped over to Persica and apologized. She appreciated his help, and then comically stuffed him under her dress. For safekeeping, I guess?

I adjusted my incredibly hellacious penis back into my pants, but good gravy, it did not cooperate. You know how it is; thing's got a mind of its own. I jerry rigged my belt to help keep my pants closed. Persica crossed her arms and chastised, "Gamer, come on, put it away..."

***

"And then you barged in with a big rawr," Gamer concluded the story. Persica had buried her face in a hand after the retelling of their amorous congress. Lord Shellie, on the other hand, sat in a clump with his arms crossed. Gamer said, "I figured you'd be pissed about me porking your bride."

Lord Shellie set the popcorn bucket aside and stood. He towered over Gamer with close proximity, "I'd be a fool to get mad. Your story is filled with silly stupidity and lies. You're just trying to rile me up. Persica warned me about your antics."

"My mouth is my greatest weapon," Gamer said proudly, and then winked.

Lord Shellie pointed a finger at Gamer, but spoke to Persica, "Tell your friend here that you are mine and I am yours. Tell him about our everlasting, unbreakable bond. Persica will always be loyal to me."

Persica remained in her hand, and breathed heavily. When she did not abide, Lord Shellie glared down at her, "Dear..."

"Pookie bear, I can't..."

"Excuse me?" the rage built.

"Gamer speaks the truth," Persica matched him. A lively fire lit up in her eyes as she stood on her toes and spoke up at Lord Shellie, "I have done what you asked, but you fail to hear even a word of mine. You want to break and mold Chanterelle to your liking. You want to use me for my confidants and resources. Yet not once have you taken my thoughts and ideas into consideration!"

Lord Shellie gawked at her rebuttal. Gamer could see his programming failing to respond to Persica's new pathway. Her evolved dialogue solidified before them, "Gamer hears me... sees me. I find myself relying on his actions and words, as he relies on me and mine. He is more than just a friend. He's... invaluable to me," Persica eyed Gamer. Her AI opened up to a whole new echelon of emotions and free thought.

"You dare defy me... and become a harlot?!" Lord Shellie stomped. That alone made the floor tremble.

"No! I love you, but the way you treat me with little to no respect hurts me. What is love without mutuality?" Persica stood up for herself without Gamer.

"I know what's best! I am the future of this kingdom!" Lord Shellie roared.

"You? Just you?" tears welled up in Persica's eyes. "Why can't it be us?"

Her expression and words tore through Lord Shellie's infuriation. He staggered back from his betrothed's condition. That change he noticed before shifted his feelings.

A hissing noise alerted the trio to the balcony. They watched a blue mouse head crawl around the balcony door and onto the floor. It wiggled erratically, and sounded like the burning fuse of a bomb. Persica screamed and jumped onto the couch, and Gamer joined her when the mouse head travelled under the couch. Based on its movements, it didn't seem to have a set path.

"What is that?!" Gamer asked. When it came out from under the couch, Gamer noticed the mouse head was a mask. It was part of a glowing body, which propelled the thing forward like a bug.

Lord Shellie directed his confused anger at this foreign object, "How dare you threaten Persica? I'll kill you!"

Lord Shellie jumped high into the air and ahead of the path of the mouse. He dropped ass-first, like a meteor. Gamer yelled out, "Wait! It might... woah, nice ass!"

"Damn, boi, he thicc!" Samira ヘ(* 。* ヘ)

"I know, right?" Persica and Gamer admired Lord Shellie's underside. The lord butt bombed the mouse. An eruption blew out the windows of the room and engulfed the whole place in flames. The floor and walls collapsed from the force.

***

A few moments prior, on the first floor of the fortress...

Smoke smoldered out of a gaping hole in the wall. The plane that crashed through it was nothing but a pile of bent metal and buried in stone debris. Asterion pushed a chunk of stone wall off him. He sat up and cracked his back. The crash landing was anything but graceful, but at the very least he was alive and inside the fortress.

"First one in... suck it, Sonia," Asterion laughed. His laugh echoed throughout the auditorium he barged into. Rows of seats were half filled by shellies. They were all in the middle of beating their meat or flicking their beans. On stage, two female chumps were frozen in sexy poses while only wearing gothic underwear, straps, and chains. Asterion's plane took out the side wall, and crushed half a dozen enemies. The remaining perverts were gobsmacked.

"No need to be alarmed. I'm here to save the ladies and kick ass," Asterion quelled any rising tensions. He rubbed his sore buttocks, though, "And I'm all out of ass."

"He ruined our show! Kill him!" one of the chumps yelled.

The whole auditorium threw dildos like darts, condoms like rubber bands, and buttery popcorn. Each bounced, bonked, and twanged off of Asterion's ultimate muscles. Asterion didn't even need to move; he remained still with his hands on his hips. After the final dildo dinked against his jawline, he uttered, "Blocked it."

The room felt the minotaur's aura. They appeared nervous and anxious, and not a pair of pants in sight. Then, one by one, every NPCs pupils glowed. The Biforce marker appeared in the center of the pupils. The shellies returned to their seats and their hands explored their groins, with blank expressions. The chumps continued their dancing and striptease.

"Okay..." Asterion skeptically moved towards the doors in the back. He exited the room and into what appeared to be a central foyer that connected all the floors of the fortress. A large, wooden lift in the center could rise up to each floor, but numerous stairs stretched along the sides for alternative access. Too many doors to count could be seen from the bottom floor, but the height difference eventually made it too hard to tell what was on the upper floors.

Asterion shook the coagulated bodily fluids from his boots, "The Biforce is already in full swing here. I hope the others are okay."

"Not only do you ruin my goon sesh, but you also resist the Biforce. Quite intriguing," a nasty, manly voice said from above.

Asterion looked to the top of a staircase above him. It led into a small hallway that entered the auditorium, to a second level Asterion had missed. The voice belonged to a man walking along the railing. The man had sickly green skin, a slicked-back mane of red hair, and a large, pointy nose. His facial features were oddly angular, with an exaggerated jawline, right-angled cheekbones, a brow ridge that could cut diamonds, and full, plush lips. Black streaks ran through the hair, reminiscent of a certain cuck. When the man glared down at the minotaur, Asterion saw a glimpse of indignation.

"Shade?" Asterion checked.

"You mistake me for another, bull man," the menacing character pressed his hips into the railing. This prominently displayed a bulge in his pants. He wore form fitting clothing that covered everything but his neck and head. It consisted of thick fabrics and strapping leathers. The man introduced himself, "I am the Edge Lord, the Degenerate Meister, the Looksmaxxing Deviant... Goonindorf!"

"Okay," Asterion wasn't interested.

"Not impressed? I have been edged for over a decade, and have reached a new echelon of power! I am the pinnacle of all men! Never cum, always edge!" Goonindorf rambled. Yep, he was definitely influenced by Shade.

"Right, you have fun with... that," Asterion did his best to block out the moans and plapping coming from the auditorium. He didn't have time to deal with the obtuse sexual stuff, and he started to walk away.

"Not so fast," Goonindorf's eyes went big with evil deviancy. "It's obvious you need enlightenment. Such a mogged specimen should not resist the Biforce. I can guarantee you'll lavish the sensation I can grant. No more thinking. No more responsibility. One... slow... edge. Join my goon squad, and we can become legendary!"

A second person stepped from behind Goonindorf. The vantage point kept them hidden from Asterion, but they were a striking, feminine male. Thin but fit, he wore a green tunic, leather boots, and a long, pointy green hat. His blonde hair was put back in a ponytail, and his ears were pointy like an elf's. From this angle, Asterion saw up the bottom of the tunic, and saw a flaccid elf penis and balls wiggling with each movement. Asterion couldn't see his face though, as he wore a bizarre mask. It had spikes protruding from the sides and top, and wide open, wild eyes.

"My primary prodigy, Hero. Like you, he had a lot of gusto. Until I introduced him to my power..." Goonindorf brushed his hands under the tunic to expose Hero's asscheeks. His hand molested the elf, and then spanked them. Hero moaned, and the eyes of the mask glowed in response.

"I will never join the dark side," Asterion glared.

"Hah! Trust me, he's really good at handling a sword," Goonindorf spanked Hero again. The elf reached behind him to the sword hilt and pulled it out. However, instead of a masterfully crafted blade, a thick slab of rubber replaced the steel. The mind controlled twink drew a one and a half meter long dildo bat. They jumped from the second level and landed before Asterion. They equipped a sturdy shield and readied for a smackdown.

A blast of stone came from farther up the stair corridor. Chunks of the fortress rained down. Asterion dodged the chunks while Hero held his shield overhead to deflect. The sound of falling destruction was soon drowned out by an emphatic, "Eeeee!"

Asterion spotted the falling Minnie. He lunged in time to catch her and break her fall. Her screech came to an abrupt end as she smiled in his arms, "Oh, hello, Asterion!"

"Hello, Minnie. Are you okay?"

"Fresh as a daisy! Now if only I can get my hands on a blue shell..." Minnie looked about. She eventually spotted Goonindorf, who leered at her with sexual intrigue. He even groped his cock bulge. Minnie's disposition shifted, "He gives me a bad feeling..."

"That's Goonindorf, the guy you mentioned."

"The enemy!" Minnie flipped her tank top inside out, and equipped her remaining boxing shell. The other was lost during the race.

"Looks like the foreplay is over, but I won't let any of you go. You will cum to me..." Goonindorf grabbed the railing and gripped it. He exhibited some strength, as his hands embedded into the metal.

"How about you come join your boyfriend and we settle this the old fashion way," Asterion taunted. Him and Minnie struck fighting poses.

"Tch, why partake when I can enjoy the voyeurism? Doing things myself is such a turn off..." Goonindorf retracted his hands and snapped his fingers. Another crash came from above and behind the duo. On the ground floor, a robust lizardman trampled through a door and skidded to a stop. One of his eyes bulged, and a crown sat upon his head. He carried with him an incredibly fat gut, and man titties that were cast in a gold plate. A cape billowed behind him and he took in the corridor with his one big eye.

Above, a purple, winged creature slammed into the center stairwell and dug into the stone with large talons. A lanky, muscular dragon with glowing yellow eyes roared with flames boiling in its throat. A long, barbed tail coiled underneath it and ended with a spear-like tip. All three members of the goon squad had the Biforce in their eyes.

"Chanterelle is not the first kingdom to submit..." Goonindorf grinned. He set forth the ultimatum, "If you do not goon with us, you will reach your climax..."

"There's a lot of them..." Minnie gulped.

"Minnie, I can afford to die. You only have one life to live. Go find your blue shell, and the others. I'll handle these punks," Asterion instructed.

"But, I'm the shield! I have to protect you!"

"It's fine. Gamer and Persica need you if we have this much trouble on our hands. Let me do the distracting, and you can do the protecting."

Minnie examined the enemies before them. She nodded, but said, "Royalty lives up high. Let's at least scratch each other's backs."

Asterion glanced up, pieced together what she meant, and agreed with a smirk. The swordsman and alligator king charged forward, while the flying Barney plunged. Minnie leapt up in front of Asterion, and the minotaur started to glow with energy. A concussive force blew out from him and startled the ground enemies. Asterion yelled, "Atomic Shell Shock!"

Asterion cannoned the shellie with incredible force. She zipped up at the purple dragon faster than it could register and clocked it with her boxing shell. The impact nearly made its eyes pop out, and it spiraled sideways. It made the sound of a nose diving airplane before hitting a wall on the second floor. Minnie bounced off the impact and landed on a higher floor. She gave a quick salute to Asterion and disappeared out of sight.

Goonindorf bellowed with laughter as the swordsman and alligator glared towards the minotaur. The Master Edger's eyes were as wild as Shade's, "I see now! I brought the gang, and you brought the bang! Get your cock out, bull man! It's goon time!"

Asterion flexed into his fighting position, "Heaven or Hell... round one! Fight!"

***

A few moments prior, near the top floor of the fortress...

"No chill, all thrill..." Sonia equipped a bracelet from her inventory before jumping out of the plane. She readied some real shit and shattered through a fortress window. She entered a small storage room. She frontflipped in rapid successions at a high speed thanks to the bracelet. When she landed, she immediately and automatically bounced like a rubber ball. It maintained the momentum from being flung out a plane and she burst through the storage door.

Blue blur ball Sonia, working title, bounced at extreme speeds through the corridors and rooms of the fortress. She soared over pits of friggin' lava, bounded beyond the multiole pipes that haphazardly broke through the floors, ceilings, and walls like some sort of plumber's pipe dream, and zipped on by enemies. Maneater flytraps tried to bite her, shellies tried to block her, and swinging fire pendulums tried to burn her. Sonia skirted their hit boxes and avoided being slowed down. She zoomed so fast that two shellies making out and rubbing nips didn't see her coming. She blasted into one and atomized them. It sprayed and traumatized their partner with blood and viscera. They didn't even register the blue blur thanks to her speed.

"God?" the shellie uttered.

Ball Sonia speedrunned... spedrun... speedran Lord Shellies's fortress in a blaze of glory. She overcame all the spike traps and pitfalls, donked enemies in the head, and even jettison through an entire hall flooded with water; all in the name of speed. One maneater plant saw her eliminate another and it screamed. Ir yanked itself free from the pipe and held its roots up like a dress's skirt. Sonia took the opportunity to use the pipe.

Dark and moist, the pipe actually had a suction to it that propelled Sonia foreward. It launched her pinball-style into another hallway, this one with a large bridge near the end. An underglow below the bridge and the heat haze cast. from the stone made it clear it was suspended over a huge magma pit. Past the bridge was a brilliant, metallic red door.

Sonia sped through the room and left enemies, trap ceilings, and falling buckets spikes in the dust. She bounced across the bridge. The heat from below wafted up and clutched to her body. She cleared the bridge and finally came to a stop by skidding her heels along the ground. She glided up to the doors and poked it with her finger.

"And time! Shaburu, Asterion," Sonia proudly beamed. She reached the boss door not only before anybody else, but did so flawlessly. She didn't burst into the final room since Lord Shellie's capabilities were unknown to her. She remembered her training, "Best to play it safe. I can't afford to die after all that. It's just like you say, Talis, find the safest route for the optimal no-death run..."

Sonia opened her character screen and instinctually spoke out to Talis, but the silence reminded her of her loss. She sighed and thought about livestreaming, but she knew the numbers wouldn't be great. She needed to keep her emotional momentum, and closed her character screen. For the first time in a long time, she was truly alone on her journey to the top, "It's such a strange feeling. I haven't solo'd since I was in high school. That's okay! I can do this without Ta..."

When Sonia put her weight down to push the doors open, she activates a pressure plate. A swinging branch of spikes shot out from the wall and impaled Sonia in the ass. She hissed with pain.

"Zasranets! You have to be kidding me!" Sonia glared at the spike trap. She nudged the trap out of her booty and rubbed the sore spot. She sighed, "Zho-pa... I jinxed myself. How does anybody get their laundry done in this goddamn place? Idi na hui!"

Sonia utilized her frustration to swing the final boss door open. The final boss room contained a high vaulted ceiling, pillars of stone, beautiful stained-glass windows, and rows of pews leading up to an altar. It was a chapel. Confessional booths were aligned on the right wall, and a reception table provided dishes and drinks on the left side. Two vertical banners hung on the chapel wall behind the altar; and displayed silhouettes of Princess Persica and Lord Shellie.

A few shellies, bobs, and gas mask nuns sat on the pews closest to the altar. When they heard the doors open, they turned to greet whoever was there. However, the boss doors closed without a new person in sight.

It confused most of the attendants, but they shrugged it off, "Must have been the wind."

Sonia hid behind one of the stone pillars. Her skills were limited to moving and schmoozing, not brawls. She'd need to leave that to Gamer and Asterion. She peeked around the pillar and counted fifteen enemies.

"Blue shellies, Fallout cosplayers, and no Lord Shellie in sight. Looks like I'll have to wait around," Sonia surmised. She shimmied from one pillar to another, and then crouched behind the back pew. Near the front corner of the room, past the confessionals, was another door. That was her goal - until it opened and a handful of nuns shuffled in. Sonia mini-panicked and dove into the closest confessional.

The small wooden booth only had a cushioned bench within. Sonia eeked the door shut, but left a sliver to peek out. Half a dozen new bodies passed by the booth. She sat on the bench and prepared to gatling kick anybody who came in.

Alas, the door remained undisturbed. Sonia relaxed, but then a wooden panel on the side of the confession slid open. Sonia could barely make out one of the masked nuns on the other side.

"Sonia... it's me, Minnie," the nun whispered.

"The nudist shellie? How did you get here?" Sonia asked.

"Welp, sit back and relax. It's a crazy story..." Minnie prepared for storytime. She happily recalled the plane crash and the insufferable pain therein.

Sonia tried to listen, but the wood panel opposite Minnie's opened. It spooked Sonia, but a nervous male's voice recited, "Dear mother, forgive me for I have sinned..."

Sonia ignored Minnie's info dump on Goonindorf and his goon squad in favor to check out the repenter. It was a shellie, with his hands clasped and head down. He wore a blue shell. Sonia acted the part, "Yes? My child?"

He continued, "I have coveted my neighbor, Hannah, though she is with Jorl. I have such a yearning for her flesh during these wedding celebrations..."

"Oh, that's fine. Covet who you want," Sonia advised.

"What? Really?" the shellie sounded hopeful.

"Sure! Why don't you go ahead and tell me your thoughts. Air 'em out," Sonia provided an outlet for the guy. As he enthusiastically rambled about his perversion, Sonia switched to Minnie. She was in the middle of her orgy description, and the copious amount of glue sniffing they did. Sonia interjected with a whisper, "Oi, do you want to make a deal? You help me, and I'll get you a blue shell?"

"Really? Sure!" Gamer's friend didn't even care about the terms.

"Great, I'll secure a blue shell, and you'll help me take out Lord Shellie so I get the points instead of Gamer. We both walk away with big wins, you can protect Gamer and Asterion from... whatever, and you don't have to risk your neck trying to steal one," Sonia laid out the benefits.

"But Gamer needs points to help his sister. Defeating Lord Shellie will earn him a whole bunch!" Minnie remained loyal.

Sonia rolled her eyes, but admired the dedication. She ignored the male shellie's description for strangling himself with a door for gratification and said, "How about this Goonindorf guy? We can team up to beat him. Up or off, whatever it takes."

"Okay!" Minnie held up the peace sign with her fingers.

Sonia wanted to laugh at how absurdly easy it was, but the male shellie was in tears. She cleared her throat and spoke to him, "I think I know how to absolve you of your sin."

"You do? Please, anything, mother!" the shellie pleaded.

"First, my child, you must remove all your garments. Expose your sin in all its horror, so that it can be cleansed of you posthaste! My assistant will take the tainted shell of yours!"

"Yes, mother! I see where you're going with this," the shellie slipped out of their shell. Minnie followed along, went over to the nude shellie's door, and was handed the blue shell. Minnie vibrated at the sight of the unscratched and stainless shell. She returned to her booth to secretly switch out of the nun's outfit.

Sonia clapped her hands, "Excellent! Now, the next step is..."

But before Sonia could carry on, the screen frame between the booths was removed. She raised an eyebrow and peered through, only to be surprised by the emergence of the shellie's rock hard cock. Its tan tone and shape were very human-like. It shot straight up like a raised banana. Sonia gawked at its shine and length, and the shellie said, "Thank you for the cleansing, mother! I'm such a naughty boy!"

His erratic perversion made Sonia wonder if he was under the influence of the Biforce. A throbbing cock in a place of worship, and an exposed enemy giving himself to Sonia - the two ideas converged in Sonia's mind and increased her heart rate. She peered over at Minnie's screen and saw the turtle girl having a hard time with removing the nun outfit. Lord Shellie or Goonindorf weren't here yet. Sonia shrugged; she had time.

Sonia brushed her hand across the shellie's cock bottom-up. She glided across his balls and giggled when he seized up. She rubbed along the bulging urethra and watched the head flare. Sonia gripped under the head and pumped the shaft. He had no control, because precum dribbled out instantly.

"Aw, sweetie, you must be so pent up thinking about your neighbor. You're so sensitive," Sonia mommied the shellie. He breathed heavily while she stroked him. The precum dripped to the floor, but Sonia didn't let it all go to waste. She used her hand to spread it from his head to the base of his shaft.

"I don't know if I can last very long," the shellie warned.

Sonia smirked, and thought about the overwhelming pleasure Asterion and Gamer were able to perform. The enemy had such a pitiful cock, which ached and twitched like crazy in her fingers. Yet she wanted the enemy to blow his load and make a mess of the confessional. She sped up the jerking.

The shellie moaned through the wall, and Sonia hastened the act. She pointed him to her lips and took his head in. He tasted nice. She swirled her tongue around the tip and neck, and grinded it all with hot lashings.

"Ah... ah... I'm about to..." the male shellie whimpered. Sonia quickly took him out and squeezed under his helm. It darkened the tip, but denied him the orgasm. He sounded so pathetic; Sonia smiled.

"Make it last a bit longer, sweetie. Forgiveness does not come so easily," Sonia stood up. She framed her thighs on either side of his banana, and then clamped her legs close. His heat pressed into her groin and thighs, and sent a wave of ecstacy up her spine.

"Edge me, please... I'm just a worthless gooner..." the shellie begged. Yep, the Biforce was in full effect.

"Sure, sweetie. No more thoughts, okay? Focus on the feeling."

Sonia thrusted her hips back and masturbated the shellie with her thighs. It rubbed and tickled her undercarriage, and made her bite her lower lip. Having the enemy in the palm of her hand, begging and cooing, was hot. Her breathing haggard along with his, and she glanced down every so often to see his head thrust out from between her legs.

The moans intensified, and the shellie barely got out, "I'm... cu..."

The shellie gasped like an actual turtle as his member flexed up and out. It pressed into Sonia's cooch and his spurts made her moan. The cum blasted across the floor and some of the bench. The shellie humped more, and Sonia squeezed with her thighs to help him milk. Mess successfully made.

"Oh, thank you, mother..." the shellie groaned. He retracted his cock through the screen.

Sonia grinned. A dirty trick came to her for this lowly soldier, "We're not finished yet. You may have given me your sin, but we must still cleanse you."

The shellie gasped, "What's next?"

"I will now administer the holy water that'll cleanse your filthy body. Step closer to the screen, gooner," Sonia declared.

Minnie changed from the nun vestments and gas mask to the blue shell. It fit well and barely weighed on her. It was as light as the other shells, with the durability of diamond. She gleaned with joy. When she stepped out of her booth, the enemies in the room paid her no mind; just another shellie. She tossed the nun outfit into Sonia's booth through the slightly ajar door to give her the same advantage with the disguise. Minnie heard Sonia give a gasp, followed by a devilish giggle.

The repenting shellie stumbled out of his booth. He was drenched, and yelled like a maniac, "I have been cleansed! I am free from sin!"

Sonia stepped out next, with the nun outfit on. Due to her height, the vestment rode up on her thighs. That and her thigh high boots framed a slice of her bare thigh; the perfect amount of AT.

"What'd you do to him?" Minnie asked, baffled by the nude shellie's state of mind. He dashed about in his nudity and shocked many of his cohorts.

"I squirted on him," Sonia shrugged nonchalantly.

"Praise be! Free is me!" the drenched shellie cheered.

"Ah, so you gave him 'holey' water," Minnie punnied. Sonia and her laughed ostensibly, with forced hucks and feigned giggles.

Judgment rained down upon the shellie when five spears pelted and killed him. The attending shellies yelled in unison, "A shellie without a shell is just a lie!"

"Kuso! He's with the actual Lord now..." Sonia gawked behind the mask. Minnie gulped and quietly appreciated her independence.

"Who are you?" the shellies and bobs approached Sonia and Minnie. The shellie in the lead, who wore a bowtie for the wedding ceremony, asked, "You're taller than the others. What's with that?"

Sonia needed an alibi, sound reasoning, and careful persuasion to navigate being caught. She quickly crafted a well-organized narrative in her mind and opened her mouth. Minnie squeaked, "We've been caught, Sonia! They see through our disguises!"

"Pizdec..." Sonia slapped her forehead.

"Intruders! Blow them!" the bowtie shellie commanded. The bobs hyped each other up with compliments and encouragement. Their fuses began to spark.

"Oh, 'blow us up'... thank goodness," Minnie sighed with relief.

"Aw! They're so adorable! I love their team spirit!" Sonia dotted. Her reaction surprised the bobs, and they all blushed instead of exploding on them.

A cacophonous vibration shook the chapel. The ceiling collapsed from what seemed to be an explosion. Gamer, Persica, Lord Shellie, Kammy, and Qammy fell through into the chapel with a whole bunch of furniture. Luckily for them, they fell atop a couple of the chapel's chandeliers. Gamer and Persica landed on one, while Lord Shellie and the shellie mages found the other. The chandeliers detached from the now destroyed ceiling and plummeted.

"Ow, that stung," Lord Shellie rubbed his butt. He had a great ass!

"Good going, m'lord," Gamer mocked with wall-eyes. "Now we're falling to our deaths."

"I didn't see you do anything. At least I killed the thing," Lord Shellie snapped back.

"You could've killed us!" Gamer shook a fist. They all stood up on the falling chandeliers, and Gamer helped Persica to her feet. This obviously made Lord Shellie jealous. Gamer noticed the princess didn't have a single scratch on her, and this piqued Gamer, "Speaking of which, how are you unscathed?"

Persica reached into her cleavage and pulled out the shrooman, "Shroomans can't be harmed. Punch them, stab them, burn them, do what you will, they always bounce back. They are for me what Minnie is for you."

"Why do you think I had my mages turn them into blocks? I couldn't kill the little bastards!" Lord Shellie verified.

"What is death to an immortal?" the undying mushroom man said with terrifying pep.

Gamer realized the shroomans were unkillable NPCs, and sighed, "You know, it's all making sense. By the way, how have we not hit the bottom yet? Lord Shellie, why is your fortress so oddly long and shapely."

"To be honest, even I don't get it sometimes. By all accounts, it doesn't make a lick of sense," Lord Shellie pulled down a roller map of his fortress, with misshapen corridors, obtuse height and length, and dimensions that stretched outside the fortress perimeters.

Video game logic, Gamer figured, "Well, as long as we don't encounter any more explosives, I'll be happy."

"Gamer!" Sonia called from below. Gamer peered down, and nearly digitized at the sight of all the anxious bobs, "Look at all the bomb people they have here! So kawaii!"

"Son of a b..." the chandeliers hit the mob of bobs, and they detonated with rapturous destruction.

***

A few moments prior, in the library below the chapel...

The library was more tall than long, with a second floor. Bookshelves blocked the walls and each shelf was jam packed with literature. This was a place of knowledge, escapism, and dust.

"And doth thee bringeth a honey'd sausage, to whom thee shall s'rve mine own palette with need and eag'r?" Goonindorf read from a dark romance novel. His pants were pulled slightly down, and a massive, throbbing cock rose out of them. More weapon than body part. Its heft caused it to lean forward and drape over the Hero's mask. The mask's eyes rotated in a hypnotic spiral. The elf beneath breathed heavily. The gold-chested alligator stood defensively a few feet in front of them.

"Pick him up, Kruel. I'm not even close to being finished," Goonindorf tossed the book aside.

Kruel, the alligator, stomped over to a knocked over and broken bookcase in the middle of the library. As he lifted it up, movement beneath shifted. Asterion bucked up and splintered the bookcase into pieces with his horns.

Kruel grunted, taken aback by the splinters. The minotaur's body glowed for a moment, and then he dashed forward with an outstretched arm, "Atomic Clothesline!"

Kruel countered with his golden tatas and slammed them into the clothesline. The gold-plating cracked, but absorbed the Super. Asterion gasped, and then a mouse bomb scurried out from behind the alligator. Hero had released three mouse bombs from between his femboy legs.

"Not again..." Asterion gritted his teeth. One bomb exploded and juggled the minotaur, while the other two veered off, up walls, and out of windows. Where they went to explode, nobody knew.

Kruel somehow jumped and brought a fist down on Asterion. He dunked the minotaur back into the bookcase debris. The dust temporarily clouded the area.

Asterion mumbled under the debris, "Two-versus-ones aren't my strong suit."

The Deviant King raised a hand up while Hero hand serviced his green monster. The debris magically lifted up and freed Asterion. Goonindorf displayed psychic power and tossed the debris aside. He adjusted his legs and used a boot to shove Hero away. He forced his engorged member back into his pants.

"This is what ten years of a no nutting life can earn you. Are you ready to submit?" Goonindorf grinned.

The ceiling caved in. Debris, people, and a whole ass chapel collapsed into the library. Shellies and nuns rained in, all unconscious from the bob bombing. Minnie and Lord Shellie entered their shells to avoid damage from the bobs and the following fall. Gamer and Persica zipped bombardment on his flying broom.

Goonindorf narrowed his eyes and suspended all the debris and unconscious bodies in midair. Lord Shellie and Minnie landed nearby, while Gamer and Persica touchdown next to Asterion. They all greeted one another, but were perplexed by the suspended objects.

"Mother of God..." Gamer dramatically removed the sunglasses he equipped through customization.

"Why must you all ruin my sessions?!" a vein bulged in Goonindorf's forehead. His eyes went wild with hate, and Gamer saw the visage of Shade. Goonindorf flung his arm to the side and all the debris smashed into the library wall. It crumbled out of the fortress and tumbled down the volcano side, into a canopy of trees below.

"Who is he?" Gamer asked Asterion.

"Goonindorf," Asterion introduced. He glanced at everybody who arrived in the usual chaotic fashion, and noticed the missing furry, "Where's Sonia?"

Minnie, as well as Lord Shellie, emerged from their shells. She answered, "I saw her use one of those gem things before the explosion. In a blink of an eye, she was gone!"

Lord Shellie snorted. He glared down Hero, Kruel, and Goonindorf, "What are you doing here?! What have you done to my home?!"

"Speak when spoken to," Goonindorf held up his fist and flashed the Biforce. The triangle appeared in the center of Lord Shellie's pupils, and his expression softened. He gained control of the lord. He turned the symbol towards Persica, "And you, be a good whore and come serve your king."

Persica glared the Biforce down, and her mind remained hers. Goonindorf gawked, and noticed Gamer and Minnie didn't fall victim to him either. His eyes locked onto Gamer, who smooched at him. Goonindorf uttered, "Vile Gamer..."

"Aw shit, here we go again..." Gamer sighed and walked forward. However Goonindorf arrived, they could officially blame Shade for the trouble. Gamer quickly drew his magnum and fired at Goonindorf. The Dark Dickness held up a hand, kung fu style, and the bullet slowed to a stop in front of him. It then dropped harmlessly to the floor.

"He's beginning to believe..." Samira (Θ︹Θ)ს

"Pathetic... make them cum!" Goonindorf tilted his head to the side. Kruel threw his weight at the group, man tits first. Minnie jumped before everybody and parried the attack with her shell. They danced around the library like bumper cars.

Lord Shellie unleashed a draconic roar and dashed at Gamer. After closing the distance, he spewed flames. Persica moved in front of Gamer and held the shrooman forward. The little mushroom guy absorbed the flames, but writhed and screamed, "Waaah!"

Lord Shellie clamped his mouth shut and was eye-to-eye with Persica. Even with the Biforce active, the mind controlled shellie hesitated.

"Pookie bear..." Persica lowered the exhausted shrooman and gazed into her lover's eyes.

Hero rushed forward next and stabbed his dildo bat at Persica. Gamer intercepted by kicking the bat to the side and bringing a knee up at Hero. The elven twink blocked with his shield. Gamer glared into the menacing mask, "That's a nice weapon of yours. It'd be a shame if somebody came along and took it from you."

An alien roar penetrated the atmosphere as a purple dragon crashed into the hole in the library wall. Its scorpion tail stabbed at the back of Gamer's head, but a meaty minotaur hand caught it before it could reach. Similar to Lord Shellie, the dragon breathed out fire. Asterion entered I-frames and jumped at the dragon. The flames pinged off his body like bullets against a ship's hull. Asterion pierced his horns into the dragon's hide and sent it reeling out of the hole. However, as Asterion landed, the dragon's tail wrapped around his ankle and yanked him off the edge.

"Asterion!" Gamer pushed Hero away and ran over to the hole. Hero tried to take advantage and spun like a top with his dildo bat extended. That's when Minnie spun into the picture and met with the elf's attack. She kept Hero and Kruel at bay with her defense, and they all ricocheted from one another like a game of Beyblades.

Gamer made it to the hole in the wall. A sheer drop led to the slanted cliff face and wicked forest of the volcano mountainside. Asterion clung to the edge with one hand. The dragon dangled below him, still latched on.

"Give me your other hand!" Gamer dramatically reached down. The howling wind gusted against them.

Asterion, blood trickling from his forehead, smiled gently up at his friend, "I softened them up. Now it's up to you."

"Don't..." tears welled up in Gamer's eyes. Asterion's fingers slipped and the minotaur fell to his death. Gamer belted a Game Awards-worthy cry, "Nooo!"

Asterion turned to meet with the dragon mid-fall. They wrestled for a moment, but the dragon used its wings to flap away. Asterion had nothing to grab or hold onto, and the dragon reared for a charge. It dove into the minotaur, dragged him across the fortress wall, and the two of them disappeared into the forest canopy.

Gamer recovered to his feet and glanced into the library. Minnie dealt with Goonindorf's goon squad, while Persica tried to pacify her fiance. Gamer and Goonindorf's teams were predisposed. The King of Degeneracy grinned, "This is fine. I much prefer to go hands on with the climax."

Goonindorf levitated and flew straight at Gamer with an outstretched, handjob-prepped hand. Gamer dodged to the side, lined Goonindorf up with the hole in the wall, and yelled, "Defenestrate!"

Gamer launched with a drop kick, but froze in midair. Goonindorf had put two fingers to his forehead and focused. Gamer growled, "You gotta be kidding me..."

"There's only room for one alpha in Chanterelle!" Goonindorf grinned and eyeballed the hole in the wall.

"Gamer!" Minnie popped out of her shell and grabbed Gamer.

"Minnie!" Persica saw the dilemma and grabbed Minnie. They both pulled, but couldn't overpower Goonindorf's edge-based powers.

"Hey, macarena! Aya!" Gamer joined in the yelling. However, Goonindorf launched him out the hole. Minnie and Persica stayed tandem, and all three plummeted.

Lord Shellie, Hero, and Kruel gathered. Goonindorf and his array of mind slaves stepped up to the edge. They watched Gamer and the girls disappear in the tree canopy.

"Now that they're dealt with, nothing stands in my way of becoming the Goon King. Let us start the greatest goon sesh of all time," Goonindorf and the goon squad headed out with the throne room in mind.

***

Asterion and the purple dragon crashed through the canopy and plowed into the ground. Volcanic rock sprayed up from the crater.

The dragon erected its tail, and stabbed down towards the grounded minotaur. Asterion grabbed it right before it could penetrate his face. His muscles bulged as he strained to keep it from killing him. The tip was inches away from his snout. The dragon made things worse by stomping on Asterion's torso. He grunted, and the dragon pulled its tail up. It readied another strike, however, a beam of energy struck it in the chest. The dragon flew backwards and clutched the burn wound. Asterion glanced up to see a spaceship parting the trees with its metallic form. It resembled a futuristic battle armor helmet, and colored orange. The windshields in the front were green tinted. It fired more beams at the dragon, but it dodged and flew away in anger. Its roar echoed in the skies. The firepower successfully chased it away.

Asterion struggled to his feet and took a moment to catch his breath. The spaceship hovered over the ground, and a door opened up somewhere on the top with futuredoornoise. mp3. A figure raised up out of the ship, silhouetted by the setting sun. The figure floated down, gently, and hovered like her ship.

The woman matched Asterion's height. She wore a blend of orange battle armor and a sky blue skirt. The armor covered her whole body, and the skirt was battered from combat. One of her arms was a whole ass cannon. Her long, blonde hair defied gravity, and the back was tied into a ponytail. Her beauty matched a model's, and she exuded maternal energy.

"Thanks for the save, but who are you?" Asterion greeted the spacefarer.

The woman bowed her head, "I am Samanthus Rosalina Orion. I'm happy to meet one of Persica's travelling companions, Mr. Bull."

***

On the highest floor of the fortress, Goonindorf and his squad arrived at the chapel doors. The devastation of the bobs left the place without a floor. Goonindorf summoned his powers to float stone debris like a suspended bridge. They walked over to the doors near the destroyed confessionals. Goonindorf entered first.

They stepped into the throne room. Huge pillars, chandeliers, and portraits of Lord Shellie decorated the room. A runner carpet went from the chapel door to a large, golden throne with red cushioning. Goonindorf expected the throne to be empty, since Lord Shellie was now under his control, but a person sat on the throne. She wore a funny wolf beanie, and sat crooked in the throne, with one leg slung over an armrest.

Goonindorf and his squad stepped halfway to the throne. The Deviant King explored the woman's petite body with his eyes, and lust soon filled them. Her face seemed nostalgic, "And who are you?"

Sonia tapped her slung leg's heel against the side of the throne while resting her chin on a propped up arm. Her level of confidence matched her lacksadaisical posturing, "I'm first place."

***

In the forest below, Gamer fluttered his eyes open. Critters all around freaked out at the sudden arrival of him, Minnie, and Persica. Branches and leaves covered him and Persica. His broom was a few feet away. He barely got it out in time to save their lives.

"You okay?" Gamer asked. He sat up, but clutched his ribs. They felt like they were on fire, and pain radiated from them.

"I am... thank you," Persica shuttered to all fours. Her wedding dress was ripped, and some of the fall left scratches along her arms and face. She glanced up through the canopy and to the hole in the fortress wall, "Goonindorf is more powerful than I could imagine. Lord Shellie couldn't even..."

"He's alive; he's fine. We're alive; we're fine," Gamer utilized calm to help Persica refocus. They helped each other up.

"Yes, this is true. We can't lose ourselves just yet," Persica adopted the calm.

"Bro, what are you going to do? That Goonindorf is the real skibidi Ohio! ╥﹏╥" Samira showed concern.

"Ultimately, with those psychokinetic powers of his, I can't smash, melee, or brawl with the guy. We need an alternative solution," Gamer pondered.

"Modern day problems require modern day solutions!" Samira reasoned.

"We post secret footage of him having sex on social media! The embarrassment will be bonkers!"

"Those are a dime a dozen, bro! What's pop on scene right now is drip drizzling. Make fun of the fit!"

"Nah, he actually looks dope," Gamer couldn't deny the truth. He was known for his honesty.

"Troof!" ( ´～｀ヾ)

"Minnie!" Gamer quacked. His outburst made Persica jump a little.

Minnie snapped up out of a pile of branches. She survived thanks to the blue shell, but had been buried. She smiled, "Hello!"

"Alright, we got the original trio together again. I don't know where Asterion or Sonia are, but ain't no way are they gonna take Goonindork or Lord Shellie out without us!" Gamer hyped up his team.

Minnie waddled over and asked, "How are we going to take them out?"

"I wish to save my beloved," Persica said. "Though our relationship is in rough waters, I still can't bear the idea of him being hurt. Same with the swordsman in the green tunic. From what I know of Hero, he was a valuable warrior to Highrule. We should free him and Lord Shellie from the Biforce."

"Goonindorf thinks he's invincible because he hasn't nutted in ten years. That just means his balls are a bigger targeg. We're going to save all of Chanterelle from that Shade wannabe asshole," Gamer smacked a fist into an open hand.

"You have a plan?" Minnie knew how Gamer played.

Gamer nodded, "We're going to make the gooner cum!"