Reflections IV

Reflections IV

I find it strange in stories when a wife asks or tells her other half she wants to sleep with another man, whilst dissuading her the MC does not go after the AP. I did it in my Reflections series. It was fun thinking up ways to get Andrew to think it was not worth the hassle of trying to have sex with Julia.

I was quite gentle with the prospective AP in this story.

The Oxford English dictionaries define fiction as "something that is invented or untrue." So please do not tell me 'It would not happen like that'. Because you are correct It probably would not.

Dictionaries also tell me there are several meanings for the word fantasy. This is the one I have used. 'The faculty or activity of imagining, impossible or improbable things.'

This is fiction, with an element of fantasy.

It will be plainly obvious I know very little about commercial banking.

I have tried to make it entertaining and I hope you are entertained by this little tale.

This is a short story that came about because of feedback and comments from my 'Reflections' Series. That is why it is called Reflections IV. I wrote it in 2023 and have only just found it needing a final edit. There is a little ​​CD, just enough to set the scene.

I like intervention stories, but what is being intervened in this story?

With or without her?

Kathy was sitting on the settee next to me, there was some boring crap on telly. It was a Saturday evening; we had just had a chilli with wild rice for tea, we were halfway down a bottle of Merlot. I felt her slide off the settee and she knelt in front of me, she took her hands in mine. "Darling, I need to ask a favour."

I had seen it coming over the past three or four weeks, I was not sure when it started, the bouts of distraction, disinterest, the lost look on her face. This was more than 'I would like a new car' or a 'Rhine cruise' for this year's holiday. The children had left home six months ago and the house was a bit empty. I wanted to downsize but Katie wanted to keep the four-bedroom house, well three bedrooms and a study type office. Spare bedroom for when Grandchildren came along. I gave in.

I met Katie in a pub. She was out with her friends. I was out with mine. She turned round suddenly and spilled bloody Mary over the front of my shirt. It was stained. She apologised profusely and offered to wash it for me. I suggested we could go to her place and she could do it there and then, that wasn't quite the way it happened. I took it to her the following day. She washed it, I watched, and we chatted, a month later we were going steady, a month after that we were in bed together. Eighteen months later, we were married. And life has been good. We have had the usual ups and downs.

Our daughter Diane moved out and went to university, Jerry decided he'd liked what his Dad did and joined my small heating and plumbing business. He enjoyed working with his hands and meeting people. He would be a natural to take over my business when I slowed down or retired. He had moved in with his girlfriend six months ago.

Katie worked in a bank, there were three of us in my company. Me, Jerry and my mate Dave. I had known Dave from school. We went to the same company to learn our trade. I started out on my own and when I needed help, I contacted Dave. He still worked for the company we started with. Dave was brilliant at plumbing and heating and a lovely bloke. He had absolutely no interest in taking over the business. He was very happy to teach Jerry everything he knew. Which is actually more than me. Katie did all of our accounting because the business banked with her bank.

"Sweetie, I need to ask you a favour. It's a big favour, a very big favour. Please let me finish before you say anything."

I did not reply.

"When we met you had a lot of experience with the ladies and I've benefited from that, but I had none."

I did not like where this was going and the answer was always going to be 'No' if she suggested any of the things I thought she was going to come up with.

"I love you with all my heart, but I want to try another man. Just once."

"No, not a fucking cat in hells chance." I shouted as I stood up.

"You said you'd let me finish."

"I never said that at all, you took my silence as an agreement to let you finish, it wasn't. Whatever you are about to suggest the answer is 'No'."

I was expecting many things but not that. I walked into the kitchen, nearly ripping the fridge door off its hinges I reached in, grabbed a beer and cracked the top off and walked into the garden. The sun was setting over the back of the house where we had so much fun over the years. Family and friends' barbecues, children running around, family celebrations. I felt Katie slide up beside me.

"My sweetheart you had many girlfriends before you met me, and I know I benefited from that experience. I want to do this, to explore so I can be better for you."

All the old fucking cliches. I could not believe it. I turned, looked at her and said. "What part of 'No' do you fucking not understand. You go ahead with this, I will divorce you." In the few minutes I had been there I formed a plan in my head. I placed the beer down on the table and stormed inside and picked up my mobile phone.

I will fucking stop her, I will shame her.

I wasn't particularly fond of her parents, but that was alright, her Dad was okay, but her mother thought she married beneath herself by marrying a plumber, even though I provided a nice house with excellent heating, and two lovely grandchildren. But I am sure they would help me sort this out.

I dialled Brian, he answered. "Hi Phillip, this is a nice surprise nothing wrong is there?"

"Yes, there is. Is ​​Lucille there?"

Katie turned up in front of me and was watching me with a quizzical look on her face.

"Can you get her and put this on speakerphone?"

"Of course, she's here with me and now you're on speakerphone. What's wrong?"

I took a deep breath. "Your daughter wants to sleep with another man apart from me and I have said 'No'. I think you should talk some sense into her before I divorce her."

Katie's mouth hung fully open, her eyes wide; she didn't believe I had done that.

"Philip," I heard Lucille say. "I think you should consider that it would be good for everybody. It will give her some more experience. I gather you were a bit of a man about town before you met Katie, I don't know how many men she slept with before you, but I don't think it was many. I think it would benefit your relationship with the children gone. I think you should just suck up your ego and let her do it."

I joined my wife with the goldfish look, mouth completely opened, stunned. I was getting no help here.

Then Lucille carried on. "More experience could only benefit your marriage, and if you divorce her, she'll get half of your business. That's not good, is it? I gather Jerry's quite good. I'm sure he could run it without you. So, as I said, get over your ego, let her have a fling, I'm sure it won't last long."

That did not go well. I was stunned.

I had absolutely no idea what to say, so I said nothing and hung up. I looked at Katie. I think she was as amazed as I was, I didn't care. I walked past her back into the garden. I needed my beer. My phone rang, I looked at it, it was Brian. I declined the call and twice more before I got my bottle of beer.

I sat down in one of the garden chairs. Katie followed me outside. She looked at me. "Sorry my darling, I have to do this." She placed another beer bottle in front of me then went back indoors.

I would like to say I calmed down, but that wasn't fucking happening. But the level of resignation settled over me. There were questions running around in my head.

Why now?

Where did this come from?

Had she done it already and this was just justifying it?

Did she have someone in mind?

When was this going to happen?

There were also several other half formed questions bubbling around in my head when my phone message notification beeped. I looked at the preview and it was from Brian 'please, please answer th...'

It rang seconds later. I accepted the call this time. Brian started. "Phil, please don't hang up, give me a chance to speak, there are things you don't know."

I knew Brian liked intrigue and he had just thrown me a whole bucket load of it in those few words. I couldn't resist. "You have Thirty seconds if I don't like what I'm hearing I'm going to hang up."

He got me with his first sentence. "Back in the day before Katie was born Lucille and I were swingers."

"Fuck." I said.

Brian carried on. "We were doing it for a few years until Katie came along. Then we stopped. And before you ask, Katie is mine. We restarted after Katie left home, in fact we still do it occasionally now."

"Bloody hell Brian. So, this justifies her wanting to sleep with another man?"

"No, not at all I'm just telling you where Lucille sees it from. You have to make your own decisions like I did all those years ago."

"I get the impression you weren't too happy about it."

"Not initially, but I asked myself a question: was I better with her or without her, once every month or two I might have to share her for a few hours, and I will have some fun myself and trust me I was not left out, I did learn an awful lot of stuff."

"I still get the impression you'd rather not have done it?"

"Not at the start but I lived with the decisions I made, and in my situation if I had to make the same decision I would do it all over again because I love Lucille and trust me life is better with her than without her." I could hear him breathing over the phone. "But you are not me, you have to make your own decisions. I just wanted to explain where Lucille was coming from."

"You've certainly given me something to think about. But I'll tell you one thing now if she goes ahead with this whatever the pain, I will divorce her. Goodnight and thank you, I think." With that I hung up.

But he had said one thing that piqued my interest: would I be better with her? I thought about it for a while and came up with a solution, but it wasn't really a solution. It was just a way forward over this problem. I would try to intervene and prevent this thing happening because I would be better with her than without her. But one thing was certain in my head: If she did carry on and have sex with another man, I would divorce her. I thought for a few more minutes getting some of the jumbled mess in my head sorted and I walked back indoors. I needed a drink, something cold and sharp. I went to my beer fridge and there was an Adnams Double Ghost. Sharp clear cold, just the thing for this.

I need to find out who had put this in her head, possibly her mother, but I didn't think so if she did not do it this time, I had to frighten her enough to not think about doing it again.

She was sitting on the settee tears were pouring from her eyes however I had no sympathy.

I said glaring at her. "Do you want to stay married to me?"

"Yes, yes absolutely."

"Then stop this now and I will try to forget about it, but I warn you if you carry on, I will divorce you. I will not warn you again." I was sure I would have to remind her several times.

"Please Phil, it will just be for one weekend to experience something else. You have brought so much into this marriage, and I feel I have brought so little, please I love you if you love me, you will let me do this."

More old fucking cliches again, it didn't deserve a response.

I growled at her. "So it has gone from having sex once with a man to a whole weekend." That answered some of the questions in my head. "Who is he?"

"There is no one. That's why I want a month to find someone suitable. No friends, nobody we know, a stranger." She was looking me straight in the face, not blinking.

"A stranger riddled with STD's, good luck with that one then."

She was shocked, I don't think she thought of that. "We would use condoms." She seemed to think that answered that question.

"I need to understand this so I've got several questions, and I warn you if I find one lie, one untruth, I will stop talking and see a solicitor Monday morning."

I think she took that as I was thinking that I might let her do it or she might get away with it. Like me not replying to her asking me to let her finish, she took my silence as acquiescence. It wasn't, there were things I wanted to find out.

"Give me your phone, your work phone and your work laptop. because I don't believe you."

She came back with all three. I held my hand out and she passed me her phone. "Tell me." I held it up to her. "Have you changed the passcode?" She shook her head. I put it in, checked emails and messages. I could find nothing on it. I fiddled with it a bit then threw it onto the settee. She held out her work phone, she unlocked it first. I searched that as well, nothing was obvious, some things from W Rich. All business but a bit familiar for business I thought, things like 'looking forward to our next meeting' and 'it was good to meet up'. There were meeting arrangements at strange times. By now she unlocked her laptop and passed it across to me. I searched her emails and her calendar and all the meetings with W Rich mentioned were attended by other staff members.

"Right, my first question, have you done this already and are trying to justify it? You've been down this last couple of months, despite me trying to find out what it was, you just told me 'it was nothing' so obviously it is 'something'. I thought it was a new car or holiday but now you want to fuck somebody else or are you guilty and you've already done it and now trying to justify it."

Her face was a complete mess. I'm sure that thought hadn't even crossed her mind.

"No, no I swear to you I have not done anything. I couldn't go behind your back. You know me so well, I could never hide it from you."

I believed her. I had known her for over twenty years, I knew when she fibbed to me, she had a tell, well a couple actually, her eyes would blink rapidly twice, and she would look at my left cheek not in the eyes.

I had to be careful with the order of these questions. "So, when is this supposed to happen?"

"I think sometime in this month, it will be over by the end of the month." It was the fourth now.

"Do you have somebody in mind?"

"No, how can you think that?"

I stood up and went upstairs into the study, the computer was just asleep, it took me seconds to Google search about 'irreconcilable differences' divorce. I found a form. Okay it had 'draft' written across the front. I hit print. I had the paper in my hand. I signed and dated it. I turned to find Katie looking over my shoulder.

I handed her the paper; she took it but did not look at it.

"I told you what I would do if you lied to me, you've given me a time frame and told me there's no one in mind, and it went from one time to a whole weekend. There is planning going on here. I don't believe you when you say you have no one lined up. You have somebody in mind, if not arranged, so as far as I'm concerned that's the end of the discussion."

She looked at the paper and said. "No, I don't want this."

"Too late. Call it off and we can talk about a way forward, and that might still end up in divorce."

I stepped around her, I went into our bedroom and I started taking all of her clothes out of the wardrobe. I walked past her again into our Diane's old bedroom and threw them on the bed. Next was the drawer with all her underwear in. I took the whole drawer and poured it onto the bed. Katie looked at me and said. "What are you doing?"

"My soon to be ex-wife wants to sleep with another man so she's not sleeping in our marital bed." I looked her in the eyes. "The bedroom that saw two children conceived in love, the one we had lots of fun and pleasure, love, laughter and crying in. She does not deserve to sleep in that room with me." I turned around, walked downstairs, picked up her phone and fiddled with it again and left it on the kitchen table. I got a beer, went back upstairs into the bedroom and kicked the door shut behind me. I put the drawer back where I got it from.

I did not sleep that night. There was obviously a lot more to this. Somebody had got to her, possibly her mother, possibly somebody from work.

The next morning. I took a risk and phoned my mother-in-law. I bit my tongue as I was saying this. "Lucille, I have to ask. I'm still thinking about this, but please be honest with me. Have you put Katie up to this because of your lifestyle? Brian told me all about it and if you want to do that that is fine by me."

I heard her giggle. I was not finding this funny, but I kept quiet. "Oh no, Katie is so straight laced she would never think about that. She had plenty of opportunities when she was younger, I'm not sure if you were her first or second, but there's certainly not many before you. If you want to lay the blame on someone it's not me. I think you should give it a go. it'll be good for you."

"Thank you Lucille, I don't think Katie would approve of your lifestyle, but I won't tell her about it. It's nothing to do with me what you and Brian do."

"You're bloody right it isn't and if you do tell her I don't care. Brian and I are happy that's all that matters. Goodbye." With that she hung up.

I pondered for a few seconds then I thought to myself. 'Yes you might be happy, but Brian is just being dragged along getting his fun where he can.'

The following morning was interesting. The first thing I did was to go into the office and print off a full petition for divorce signed it and dated it.

Katie came downstairs and she looked an absolute mess. I'm sure I didn't look much better. The papers are in front of me. She poured herself a cup of tea and sat opposite me.

"I still have several questions, but it doesn't matter you have lied to me therefore I'm going to divorce you."

"Please, please no. Give me another chance."

Something crossed my mind. She had all night to work out what lies she could get away with. "I love you with all my heart." I said. "But I will not share. So, here's the first question: who is he?"

"No one I haven't chosen anyone, it will have to be somebody I pick up that's why I want a month. I can't pick a random bloke off the street.

"I do not believe you, who is he, somebody from work?"

"No, it isn't, it can't be a random bloke off the street, I will have to search, which is why I want a month, but it'll only be two nights before the end of the month. I promise you."

"That is crap, how do you know the bloke you decide to go with is going to be any good and teach you things? There is so much shit in what you say."

As I have said in the early days, she would look at my left cheek. She had learned she did that. So now when she lied to me, she stared me straight in the face. That was her 'tell' now and she was staring me straight in the face, again.

I stood up, drank my tea, looked at her and said. "You're lying to me, still." I walked out. I heard her sobbing behind me.

She had spent the night planning, well so had I. I was now pretty certain it was somebody that works at the bank. The bank did not have a policy against fraternisation. But I'm sure there was something in there I could use, and I just knew the man to ask. I had to wait until the afternoon, I knew where he would be.

Later that afternoon I was at the Golf Club standing beside a Range Rover waiting for the owner. He looked at trifle confused as he walked towards me. I stepped forward, held my hand out. "Hello, Mr Morgan, may I have a few minutes of your time?"

As I spoke, a look of recognition passed across his face, he held his hand out. "Your Philip, Katie's husband, you have that plumbing business. I'm afraid now is not the time for banking business, if it's important I'm sure Katie can arrange a meeting."

"I'm afraid it is banking business but of a personal nature, somebody in your bank is trying to seduce my wife." I had decided not to pull any punches. He looked down, I am sure I heard him mutter the word "Fuck." He lifted his head, looked at me and said. "Would you like a drink, Philip?"

"Yes please Sir." I replied.

"Just let me drop these sticks into the Rover and I'll be with you. Please call me Andrew."

He dropped his golf clubs in the back of the Range Rover and we walked across the car park. It was quiet. We got back into the Golf Club. He pointed to a quiet corner and went to the bar. He didn't ask me what I wanted.

He came back with two pints of beer. I didn't think he was a beer sort of person.

"Philip, before you say anything I must point out the bank does not have a non-fraternisation policy in its code of conduct, if two people wish to have a dalliance as long as they're not using bank premises or equipment to facilitate it. We do not get involved. So, tell me your story."

I was very honest with him. I told him all I knew, which wasn't a great deal and all of my suspicions and the reasons for them. He asked about our circle of friends, could she be planning with one of them? I told him it was very small. Most of our friends were from the bank.

"Philip, I feel your pain." He looked down. He seemed to be thinking. We had both finished our beer. I went up to the bar and got two more. I was told I was not allowed to pay, but it was put on Andrew's tab. When I got back, he looked at me "The reason I remember you and your lad, you did my heating eighteen months ago, I was quite impressed with the work. I may have a solution for you but before I do that. I'm going to give you a little bit of background."

He took a deep draught of his beer. "But this can go no further. The problem with the banking business and especially males in the business is they get a God like power complex. I know because I had one. It was fun to chase married ladies until one day I chased the wrong one. I was met by a chap about my size, not much broader. The husband of an employee that I had been, can we say, 'nurturing'. He warned me off. He was a bricklayer or something like that, somebody who at the time I considered of no consequence. So, I ignored him. A week later I took his wife to lunch, a nice place, somewhere they would not be able to afford to go. When I came out my car had four flat tyres and a note under my windscreen wiper. I took it out and read it, it said 'If you chase married women you are going to suffer the consequences'. I looked up and there was the husband with a baseball bat resting over his shoulder. At that moment in time. I decided chasing married women was not a sport I wanted to partake in anymore. I looked at him and bowed my head to let him know I had taken his warning seriously. Which was good because three months later I met the single woman who is still my wife."

He took another sip of his drink.

"I have been in business a long time and I have seen too many families upset by that sort of shenanigans, so whilst I can do nothing officially, there are ways I can help."

"I have a plan, Katie is due her one-to-one interview next week. I will pull it early Monday. I will ask if she's had any sexual harassment. Whilst there is no fraternisation policy, there is a sexual harassment one. Monday afternoon in the quiet period I will call a staff meeting and I will tell the staff there have been rumours of sexual harassment. The bank will not stand for that. I suspect who your wife's paramour is, but I have no proof so my deputy manager who I will brief will keep an eye out to see who has the facial reactions."

"But what if it's him that's chasing Katie?"

He smiled. "As lovely as Katie is, I don't think Claire, my deputy manager, would be interested in her."

I got a message on Monday 'Walter Richardson, Confirmed. Andy' I don't know how he confirmed it, and I wasn't going to ask. I knew of Walter, I had seen him at bank functions. I remembered him because the first time I met him he had only been transferred in from another branch a week or so before and he had a massive purple and yellow bruise on the side of his face. Also he kept on going out about his Mercedes SLK with the personalised number plate.

I took a leaf out of Andrew's story. I went and found my old sheath knife that I had when I was in the Boy Scouts. I would have to be a little bit careful, it was illegal these days.

I left Jerry and Dave to finish off the job. They did not ask where I was going. Both Dave and Jerry asked if I was okay, Jerry was worried it was something with his mother. I told them I had a bad night.

It was nearly bank closing time and there were a lot of people rushing around in the street. It didn't take me long to find his car. It wasn't parked far from the bank. I have plenty of grey nondescript work clothes, a fleece with a hoodie and a pair of dark glasses. It was hard to recognise looking back at myself in a mirror.

I stabbed three of the four tyres. The car was sitting at a very strange angle. I placed the letter that said. 'If you chase married women you are going to have to put up with the consequences'. Then I noticed, thanks to the local council, there was a loose kerbstone. That bounced off the windscreen of his car and sat on the bonnet. The alarm went off. It was only then that people started to take notice of me. I nipped into the department store next to the bank, divesting myself of the dark glasses and hoodie as I went. I stood and watched as Walter ran out of the bank followed by several other members of staff. Katie was not one of them.

Walter picked up the letter, read it and then looked around, his eyes fell on me, probably because I was staring at him. I don't think he recognised me. I just walked away.

Katie came storming in. She was seething. "You have fucked it up haven't you." It was a statement not a question.

"Fucked what up?" I asked.

"He has cancelled."

"Oh, your paramour for the weekend at the end of the month you told me you had nobody lined up, so you lied to me."

"I'm sure I never said that."

"Give me your phone." She passed it over. She still hadn't changed the passcode. I opened it, pulled up the audio recorder and played her the clip where I asked the question if she had anybody in mind.

She heard herself say "No, how can you think that?"

Her face fell, she had let her anger get the better of her and she hadn't thought about what she was saying.

"I warned you what would happen if you lied to me and it appears you have lined up Walter as your lover. So, I will just go and get that paperwork and you can sign it now. Once you've signed it you can go and fuck anyone you like. We don't have to wait until it is finalised." With that I walked out the front door, I switched off the recording app on my phone and then I turned the phone off and headed into town to find somewhere to eat, well drink actually, I wasn't that hungry. I sat in the pub sipping my beer. Half of my plan, the intervention had worked. Now I had to scare her into never thinking about it again.

I was on my second pint when a shadow fell over me, I looked up and it was Katie. "I've walked around most pubs in the town until I found you." Sitting down beside me she said. "Sweetheart, can we talk please?"

I finished my beer, stood up, looked at her and said "No, I have nothing to say. You had better get used to living on your own. I want the house." I went to walk away, but I paused, looked down at her and said. "I love you, probably always will but after talking to your Dad I had to work out whether my life would be better with you or without you, and whilst my life is always going to be better with you. I will not agree to you sleeping with another person, so no matter how much it hurts me I am gone."

I walked out the front of the pub and stood in a quiet corner. It was ten minutes later when she came out just as an Uber pulled up at the front and she got in. She was either going to Walter's place now or home. I went back into the pub and had another beer and a bag of peanuts. Three was enough. I took a gentle stroll back home. I got there just after eleven. As I walked past the bedroom Katie was in I could hear her sobbing. I went and had a shower to wash the grime off me after what had happened.

Despite a busy day and three pints, I didn't drop off to sleep until after two. I remember watching numbers change on the alarm clock on her side of the bed.

A noise woke me up and I saw Katie silhouetted in the door frame. She was wearing my bathrobe. She had her arms wrapped around herself and she was still crying, this was not a seduction scene.

"Sweetheart, I fucked up, and I mean really fucked up. I am so sorry, can we talk? Please?"

"I have lost count of the number of lies you have told me." I did not count them, the first one was enough. "Because you are the mother of our children and I love you and I suspect I always will. So, I will give you one chance. But one lie, just one half-truth and that is it. There will be no coming back."

I patted the bed.

She sat down. looking at me she said. "I expect you want to know the whole story. And you deserve to hear it. No lies, no half-truths. Just the facts. Some of my feelings might be hard to explain, but I will try my best. I am going to make my excuses. They are poor and shabby in hindsight; you know that exact science you're always talking about. When you got up and walked out of the pub and told me to get used to living without you, I couldn't bear it. I'm so much better with you than I would be without you so please hear me out." She gave a very small giggle through her tears. "You can interrupt anytime, I have at least learned that lesson."

She wiped her nose on the sleeve of my bathrobe, shifted around and looked at me with one leg on the bed and the other on the floor. She faced me.

"It started about two months ago. The house had been empty for five months and you were away with Jerry for that big job outside Birmingham. You and Jerry weren't there every day. I got lonely, we have never been apart for that length of time. That was alright I coped.

"After you had been away for nearly a week I went for a drink and a bite to eat after work with some of the girls. They knew you and Jerry were away and I had mentioned it was strange eating alone, so they invited me. In the chat some of the girls were saying how much fun they had when they were younger. They went through their body count. They weren't huge numbers; the older ones were 3 or 4. The younger ones 2 or 3 apart from Zoe she had 5. They asked me what mine was. Bear in mind I'm nearly ten years older than all of them and I told them it was one and I was happy with that. There was some banter, apart from Zoe. She asked if I was ever tempted to try out somebody else. I told them you rocked my world, and I had no need to look elsewhere. Most of the girls congratulated me on finding the right man. What I didn't realise was, Walter was sitting behind listening to all that. He came and found me the following afternoon and said that I looked down, unhappy and asked if there was anything wrong. He was very nice to me, he made me smile."

She took a deep breath.

"I lied to you about not having anybody lined up because you would have worked out it was somebody from work and gone all Rambo on him, and you would have ended up in prison. And I was still hoping I could do it, and I was getting confused with the stories we had worked out. I now know how stupid that was."

Not if I did not get caught, I thought to myself.

"Anyway, we chatted for a couple of weeks. Nothing secretive, always in the open. He is good looking, charismatic, witty and I must admit it was nice to be chased. He complimented me. Yes, I know you compliment me all the time, but that's your job, you're my husband."

I interrupted. "I didn't do it because it's my job, I did it because you were worth the compliments I gave you. You make it sound like my compliments don't mean anything to you."

She winced at my use of the past tense. Good.

"Oh, they do my sweetheart, but I felt you were doing something out of duty but looking back. You know that hindsight thing, you only ever said it when I made an extra effort." She looked down. "Hindsight, you were acknowledging my extra efforts. When I think back, I realised Walter's compliments are all hollow. I hadn't done anything different. I was still me wearing the same sort of clothes I wore all week, my hair the same, makeup the same.

"Anyway, after a week or so Zoe joined us and the conversation and we got round more to sex, I know now Walter was one of her body count. They were going on about experience and how it can make a difference. The more you learned the better you could please your partner. That was when Zoe perked up and told Walter that I had only had one man. I think he already knew from the attention he had been paying me, although I didn't see it at the time. They kept on at me, Walter offered his services for a weekend away. Zoe told me how good he was, and I will come out of it better equipped to be a lover for you."

She was crying again and she wiped her nose on the sleeve of the bathrobe.

"I was so confused, I needed somebody to talk to. I couldn't talk to you, so I went and talked to Mum, and she shocked me. She told me I should try it. The experience would be good for me. She said pretty much to me what she told us on the phone the other day. I never expected her to admit it to you. But she did warn me not to go behind your back, because if I did and you found out you would certainly divorce me. She pointed out that the old adage that it's better to ask for forgiveness than to ask for permission would not work in this case with you. She warned me I might have to get drastic and threaten you with losing your company, the house and everything if you went down the divorce route."

She looked at me. "I would not have done it sweetheart."

"You do know your Mum and Dad were swingers and in fact are still doing it?"

She had a shocked look on her face "Shit, no I didn't. I sort of assumed Mum had played outside the marriage to Dad, but as they were still together, she got away with it, or Dad forgave her. Bloody hell I never thought Dad would go with that."

"We had a chat the other day on the phone, he didn't initially, but because he was getting something he went along with it. But what he did say was that our situation was not the same as theirs and I am not him. He did not try to convince me one way or another, he just told me to be my own man, and I am."

"I think Mum underestimated you, I know I definitely did. So now I had Walter, Zoe and now my Mum. A person I trusted most in the world after you and Dad telling me to do it. The only question I had now was how do I tell you. Mum suggested I give you plenty of notice to give you time to come round and to give me time to find somebody because she didn't know about Walter. And I could make it up to you before the weekend. I planned to start saying it was a one-time thing then over the month, one time would turn gradually into a weekend. Again, looking back, I didn't realise how stupid I was. That was Walter's suggestion.

"So that's it. I was convinced I could get away with it. But now I realise that was never going to happen. Walter took your warning to heart. He came straight in, walked up to me and told me it was off and he was not risking it. As he stormed off, I saw Andrew and Claire watching me. Then it all fell into place. The sexual harassment chat I had with Andrew during the morning, then the sexual harassment staff briefing. I was being manipulated, and I got angry. I came home and took it out on you, which was another big mistake. It wasn't your fault. It was all mine. Okay I can blame Walter and Zoe for pointing me in that direction and even Mum, but the decision was mine and mine alone."

She reached across and took my hand. I let her.

"I know it was you, but your secret is safe with me."

It would have probably only been a fine for the damage to his car, maybe a bit more if I had taken it out on him if he did not stop chasing Katie.

"I've had all night to think about it. I know I was wrong on so many counts, but the thing that got me thinking was you saying that you were better with me than without me, but you would still leave. You would do that to yourself. You would commit yourself to a worse life rather than let me cheat on you. Because it would be cheating"

She swung herself on the bed, took my face in her hands and said. "I would be nothing without you. I love you. I have learned my lesson. You would just walk away. I am sorry sweetheart. I will never do anything so bloody stupid again."

She leaned forward and kissed me gently on the lips. "Darling, I will do anything. Never see my mother again. I will report Walter for sexual harassment. Anything you want. I am sorry. I love you. Please forgive me, let me back into your life. Please."

I lifted up the bed covers and invited her in. I made her take my bath robe off first.

I did not need to scare her into thinking about not doing it again. She did that to herself.

Epilogue.

Did I forgive her, yes. But I was wary for a few years. Nothing happened to arouse my suspicions. We saw Lucille at Christmas and her birthday. We saw Brian much more after he and Lucille separated. I gather it was something about Lucille suggesting her daughter cheat on me. Sometimes love is not enough.

The sexual harassment complaint got Walter sacked, it was not the first complaint against him. It was not me, but Walter had an accident and had to walk with crutches whilst his knee healed. Zoe was interviewed concerning the sexual harassment claim and decided to find work elsewhere.

I am afraid like Mr Morgan the bank manager, I have done things in my past I am not proud of. Whilst a leopard cannot change its spots, humans can change their attitudes. I did, I had help.