My Cousin Grant Ch. 01

This story takes place in the same universe as the Heather series. It can be fully enjoyed without reading the series, but it does contain a spoiler for Heather Ch. 08.

I want to give a shoutout to all my followers and I hope you enjoy my first attempt at writing an incest story. If you are new to my work, please know that my stories take time to build. It will take some time for Ashley and Grant to fully share themselves. A special thanks to kenjisato for proofreading this story.

++++

"Ashley, do you have plans for the summer?"

"Yes, and I am very excited. I am going to work for a company in the Bay Area, and I start the week after the school year is over."

I had been teaching at a public elementary school for the past six years. For the last three years, during the summer break, I had worked for an online tutoring company that helped children who were falling behind, to prepare for the next school year. But this summer, I wanted to do something entirely different. What I didn't tell my best friend, Diane, was that the real reason I was excited was because the company I was going to work for was owned by my cousin. Grant.

++++

My cousin Grant and I were born on the same day, but that was not the way it was supposed to happen. Grant was three months premature, and in 1994, we were born on the same day and in the same hospital. My mom and her sister were always extremely close, and after getting married, they eventually found homes in the same neighborhood only a few blocks apart. So, it was natural that Grant and I grew up together.

I could still vividly recall the playdates that we had. Our moms would take us to a nearby park, and we would be playing on the swings, and Grant would ask, "What do you think our moms talk about when they take us to the park?"

"I don't know now, but whatever it is, it must be funny, because your mom will whisper something in my mom's ear and then they will both start laughing."

That would make us both laugh, and then Grant would say, "Come on, I'll race you to the slides."

By the time we had entered the same elementary school, we started sharing. It began innocently enough. My mom was a stay-at-home mom, and she always made healthy lunches. When it was lunchtime, I would always ask Grant, "What did your mom pack for you today?"

When we started school, my aunt started working full time, so many times, Grant's lunch was a Lunchables, and he would reply, "Pizza."

"Want to trade?"

"No way!"

"Can you at least share your Cheez-Its?"

"Okay."

When we started middle school, our sharing turned to sharing who our latest crush was. Looking back, it was very innocent, but at the time, we both took it very seriously. It was usually me that would go up to Grant and tell him about the latest boy I was crushing on.

"Hey Grant, I think there is a boy I really like."

"Really like? Like, how?"

"You know. Like, he's really cute."

"Oh, Ash, not again. Okay, who is it this time?"

"You gotta promise not to tell anyone."

"I never tell. Besides next week, it will be someone different. Now spill."

"It's Justin. And this time, it is different. I really, really think I like him."

"You have been acting weird around him. I should have guessed. Do you think he likes you back?"

"I dunno..."

Then we would both get quiet, and one of us would change the subject.

It turned out that Justin was much more than just a crush, but I am getting ahead of myself.

We also went on to attend the same high school. In May of every school year, our high school would put on a musical play. The year that Grant and I were seniors, it was The Music Man. We both tried out for the lead parts. I got the part of Marion the librarian, and Grant, who could not sing, did not get the lead part, but he was still able to be in the play. He got the part of Charlie Cowell, the anvil salesman. Justin got the part of Harold Hill, aka, the Music Man. And yes, Harold was played by the same Justin that was my sixth-grade crush.

For those of you not familiar with The Music Man, close to the end of the play, at the footbridge, there is an intense kissing scene between Marion and Harold. Justin and I had been secretly dating since the beginning of my senior year. Shortly after I turned eighteen, Justin was the boy to whom I gave my virginity. So, by the time we performed our kiss on stage, there was very little acting involved.

There was one other person I had to kiss in the play. From the beginning of the play, Charlie, the anvil salesman, had been trying to inform the townsfolk of River City, Iowa, that Harold was a fake music man. In a pivotal scene in the play, Marion kissed Charlie in order to try to stop him. During rehearsals, Grant and I would pretend to kiss, but we both knew that on opening night, the kiss would have to be real.

That week before opening night, Grant and I were in my bedroom. I was sitting at my desk, and Grant was sitting on the bed. I sensed that Grant was nervous about performing our stage kiss, and I began to tease him.

"What's the matter, Grant? Don't tell me that you are afraid to give me a real kiss."

"No, it's not that it's just that..."

Then he stopped. I had been so wrapped up with being with Justin that I just assumed that by then, he would have kissed a girl. By the look on his face, I could tell he hadn't So, as delicately as I could, I asked him, "Grant, have you ever kissed a girl?"

He tried not to show it, but I could tell he was embarrassed. He softly replied, "No." Then he surprised me by adding, "But I would like to."

Looking at Grant's face, I knew exactly who he wanted to receive his first kiss from. I still remember my first kiss and how special it was, and I wasn't sure if this was a good idea. Was I willing to be the one who gave Grant his first real kiss? For it to be special, it would have to be more than just a quick peck on the lips. Could I go there?

Before I had an answer to my question, Grant continued, "Ashley, I have always felt comfortable with you. I know that even if I'm lousy at kissing, you won't make fun of me. Also, I know that we're cousins, and if you think it's awkward, then I'll understand."

"Grant. I... I don't know what to say."

That was not true. I did know what to say. I was just afraid that once I said it, things between Grant and me could change. Then I made up my mind, saying, "First of all, thank you for trusting me. Second, I promise not to make it uncomfortable."

I got up from my chair and sat next to him on the bed. For a moment we sat there just looking at each other. I wanted to give Grant one more chance to back out, and I asked, "Are you sure?"

Grant did not hesitate. "Yes. You don't have to kiss me like you kiss Justin. Just show me what to do."

I smiled and leaned into Grant, and I lightly brushed my lips across his. I kept my eyes open, and I could see Grant was about to panic. Before he could change his mind, I said, "Just follow my lead. When I do something, you do it back to me."

I placed my lips against his lips, and I opened my mouth. He opened his mouth, and our lips pressed together. The kiss was soft, at first, but it wasn't long before I increased the pressure. Grant's lips felt warm and soft. He was a quick learner, and when my tongue slipped into his mouth, he used his tongue to flick against mine. Soon, we were probing and exploring together.

We wrapped our hands around each other, and I began to enjoy the experience. I was no longer just a teacher; I was an active participant. That was when I felt the first sign of arousal. I felt the hardness of my nipples against my bra and the beginning of wetness in my panties. Then I panicked.

I pulled back, breathing hard, and immediately noticed that Grant was also almost out of breath. Neither of us spoke. I had promised Grant that this would not be discomforting, but I had gotten carried away. I had not expected that it would lead to this. Whatever this was.

Then I saw Grant shift on the bed. I looked down at his pants and saw that he was trying to hide his erection. Yup, I totally blew that promise. I was only going to show Grant how to kiss, but I'd started to enjoy what we were doing, and I took it too far. I needed to make this right.

"Okay... We got a little carried away, but you did great."

Grant looked like a deer caught in headlights and didn't say anything, so I continued.

"Grant, we took it too far, and we won't do it again. We've had a special bond for eighteen years; let's not ruin it because of this."

I could tell that Grant was embarrassed because his cock was hard. He could not look at me, so I leaned in and gave him a hug. He hugged me back, but he did not say anything. After a while, we broke apart, and I saw that his erection had subsided, and I asked him, "Are you okay?"

He just nodded his head in agreement. I knew that there was nothing else I could say, so we chatted about school stuff until it was time for him to go home.

The opening night was great. We got two standing ovations, and the kiss between Marian and Charlie was so quick that it was over before Grant and I could overthink it. But the truth was that my kissing Grant in my bedroom was all I could think about.

Did I mention I was brought up by two strict Catholic parents? Feeling guilty is an unwritten rule if you are Catholic.

I enjoyed kissing Grant, and I was feeling as much guilt about this as I felt when I lost my virginity. I had been going to confession from when I was eight until about a month before I lost my virginity. I didn't confess to losing my virginity, and I sure as hell did not confess to kissing Grant.

++++

"I'm going to miss you, Ashley."

"I'll miss you too, Grant, but hey, I'm only going to be three hours away."

"I know, but I feel things are going to change for you. For the first time, you will be away from your parents. You've wanted this for a very long time."

Yes, I could not wait to leave for college, and Grant was right to say that things would change dramatically for me. For Grant, things remained pretty much the same. His grades were not nearly good enough to attend a four-year college, so he decided to attend the local junior college. My uncle was the owner of a thriving small business, and Grant also worked for his father when he wasn't in school. He knew that someday we would take over the business, so not going away to college worked out well. Between school and working for his father, he kept very busy, and even though we were only three hours apart, we were no longer inseparable.

There was never any doubt that I would go to a four-year college. My parents met and fell in love while attending the same college, and my father was determined that I would also be an alumnus from that college. My grades were excellent, and with my father's help, I was accepted into a hard-to-get-into college located on California's central coast. What neither of my parents could have predicted was the journey that my first year of college would take me on. During that first year in college, I developed a crush on my college roommate, Heather, had a threesome with her and her female lover; and was invited to go with them to Hawaii during summer break.

I will leave the entire telling of that journey to another story, but I do need to give you a quick recap and tell you how it ended.

Fall of 2012 to August 2013

The university I attended had a policy that you needed to live in the college dorms in your first year. Because I did not pick a roommate, I was randomly matched with an older woman who had transferred from a local junior college. Her name was Heather, and I developed a crush on her soon after I met her. My first month in the dorms was very difficult. I was frightened to be alone for the first time in my life, and Heather helped me get through that. She was sympathetic and allowed me to express my emotions. Early on, I found out that Heather was a lesbian. Things got complicated when, two months into the quarter, she rekindled a relationship with a woman from her past. Her name was Shawna, and right after our Christmas break, Heather left the dorms and moved in with Shawna.

Heather moving in with Shawna did not lessen my feelings towards Heather. The opposite happened, and my feelings for Heather intensified. What started as a crush led to attraction and eventually became exploration. Shawna not only did not mind, but she encouraged it. By the end of my first year in college, the three of us became a throuple. What Shawna did not fully realize was that I was falling in love with Heather.

Just before my summer break, Shawna invited Heather and me to spend the summer in Hawaii. The plan was that we would leave the week school was over and come back in August. Because I had a summer job, I could only spend a week in Hawaii, but it was the most amazing week of my life. Shawna had extremely rich parents, and the three of us stayed in their luxurious home. Although the three of us spent time together, I had enough time alone with Heather that by my fifth day in Hawaii, Shawna began to suspect that the feelings Heather had for me were much stronger than the feelings Heather had for Shawna. On my sixth day in Hawaii, Shawna's suspicions were verified when she walked into a guest bedroom and saw Heather and me naked on the bed. Heather had just made me cum using her tongue and her finger.

The next day, I left Hawaii for my summer job, convinced that Heather and I had a future together. I was not sure how Shawna would fit in, but in my heart, I knew that Heather and I were meant to be together.

Then my dream came crashing down.

After I got home, Heather and I texted almost daily. Most of the time, the texts were informational stuff, but once in a while, we chatted instead, and those conversations were very personal. I was feeling very good about our emotional journey and could not wait for her to return from Hawaii.

It was the third week of August, and I had just gotten home from work, and my phone vibrated. I saw it was Heather. She called me to tell me that she and Shawna had had a falling out, and she was coming home early. She asked me to pick her up at the San Francisco Airport, and when I picked her up, she would give me all the details. The last thing she said before hugging up was, I love you. It was the first time she used those words.

On the day I was supposed to pick Heather up, she texted me from the airport, and we agreed that I would meet her at baggage claim. I wanted to leave for the airport in plenty of time so Heather wouldn't have to wait too long for me to pick her up. As I was leaving the house, I heard the television. I wasn't surprised, since my dad always watched the five o'clock news. As I was about to open the door, I saw that both my dad and mom were watching the TV, which was very unusual. I was about to head out the door when I heard the words breaking news. I stopped, turned around, and stared at the TV. That was when I found out that the plane Heather was on had gone missing over the Pacific Ocean and all 239 people on board were presumed dead.

I was so devastated that I ran into my bedroom and threw myself on my bed. I kept crying into my pillow until there were no more tears. I was drifting off to sleep when I heard my bedroom door open. It was my mom. Thinking I was asleep, she said, "I am sure God had His reasons. He always has a plan."

All I could do for the next couple of weeks was mope. At first, I was in shock. Then my shock turned into anger. I kept thinking about what my mom said. What reason could a loving God have to kill all those innocent people? I was angry at God, angry at my mom, and I was even angry at myself for leaving Hawaii without her. Then, finally, the self-anger turned to guilt. I regretted the things I had never told Heather, or the moments I wished I would have handled differently. I was so depressed that I even considered dropping out of college. Then I remembered what my dad had done for me, and I had another reason to feel guilty.

Towards the end of the school year, I told my parents that I did not want to live in the dorms in my second year. My father was looking for an investment property, and he found the perfect condo in the town where I went to school. My dad bought the condo, but he made it clear that I needed three roommates to make the investment work. I had found two roommates, and Heather was going to be the third. Heather was gone, and all I wanted to do was wallow in my self-pity.

September 2013

Grant loved working for his father. When my uncle started his business, Grant was nine years old. Over the next ten years, the business grew from just one location to several locations in the Bay Area. When it started, it only employed my aunt and uncle. Then, it had grown to where it employed over a hundred people, including Grant. When Grant finished his first year in junior college, he began working full-time for his father, and he was making enough money so that he was able to move out of his parents' house and rent a small one-bedroom apartment.

Unfortunately, between going to school and working full-time, there was little time for anything else. When I first left for college, Grant and I would text and call regularly, but right after my Christmas break, we began to lose touch. The last time I saw Grant was right after I returned from Hawaii. We had lunch together, and I told Grant how close I'd gotten to Heather. When we finished lunch, he gave me a huge hug and told me how happy he was for me. I thought about that lunch and considered calling Grant, but I was in such a stage of depression that I could not bring myself to call or text him.

Luckily, he was the one to call me.

I looked at the caller ID and, in a surprised voice, answered, "Hello?"

"Hello, Ashley. Your mom called my mom and told her what happened. I am so sorry."

Hearing his voice and the way he said he was sorry made me feel instantly better. "Thank you for calling, Grant. I've been wanting so much to call you, but..."

"You don't have to explain, Ashley. I can't imagine what you are going through, but I want to be there for you."

"Thank you. Growing up, you were always the one I could tell things to."

"Well, that's why I am calling. My mom told me you haven't been out of the house in two weeks. I want you to come over to my place. We don't have to talk or anything, but if you do want someone to listen, I'm here."

I knew that if I didn't do something differently, my depression would get worse. I'd missed my cousin so much, and I knew that whatever I told him, he would not judge me. That made saying yes my only choice.

"I haven't even seen your new place. Text me the address, and I'll come over. I'm a mess, and I need to get my shit together, so I probably won't get there until late this afternoon."

"Great! Can't wait to see you."

When I saw the address he texted me, I suspected his apartment was in a neighborhood near his junior college. When I got closer and I saw old houses that had been turned into student rentals and all the apartment buildings on his street, I knew for sure. His apartment building was a newer one that, in addition to renting to students, housed young couples just starting out.

Grant lived on the second floor, and he greeted me with a big hug when he opened the door. We stood at the entrance, holding each other for a long time. Finally, Grant let go and showed me in. Grant told me about the apartment, but I was surprised how nice it looked inside. Although the living room was small, he had the right amount of furniture to make it look very livable. The kitchen was also small, but spotless.

"I'm impressed. This place looks great."

"To be honest, I don't spend a lot of time here. Work and school keep me busy, and I just mostly crash here. Can I get you anything?"

"No, I had a late lunch before coming over."

I walked towards the couch, sat down, slipped off my flip-flops, and tucked my legs underneath me. I was wearing a summer-cropped blouse and joggers, and felt very comfortable.

Grant sat next to me, reminiscing, "This reminds me of last summer when you and I would sit on your mom's couch, and you would tell me the latest thing that was going on between you and Justin."

"I know. That's before he left for college on a basketball scholarship."

"You saw him a couple more times, right?"

"The last time I saw him was when he came to visit me on Memorial Day weekend."

I told Grant some of the things we did that weekend, but not all of it, so he asked, "Is that when he figured out you and Heather were an item?"

Hearing Heather's name made me sad all of a sudden. I flashed back to Shawna's parents' place in Maui when I had seen Heather for the last time. My chest tightened, and tears formed in my eyes. I didn't want Grant to see me crying, so I started to turn away from him. Before I could turn completely away, he moved closer, wrapped his arms around me, and hugged me.

The hug felt good. Grant holding me felt good. I wanted my mom to hug me the night I found out about Heather's flight. I wanted her to tell me she understood. But, of course, she didn't understand. I didn't think Grant completely understood either, but his hug was so welcome. He looked at me, waiting for me to say something, but when I didn't, he just held me.

He noticed how tense I was, and eventually, he said, "I have an idea. Turn around on the couch."

"You want me to turn around. Why?"

"I want to give you a shoulder massage."

Getting a massage sounded really good. But I wanted to be comfortable. I got up, took the cushion from the couch, placed it on the floor, and sat on the cushion with my back towards Grant.

I heard him rubbing his hands together to warm them up.

"When did you learn to give a professional massage?"

He gave a snort, exclaiming, "I don't know if this will be an expert massage, but hopefully you'll feel better."

He placed his legs on either side of me, and I felt his long, warm fingers on my neck."

"Mmmm," I murmured.

He slowly moved his fingers along my neck. He stayed at my neck, not going any further. Using his fingertips, he gently stroked the base of my skull. Just as I was letting the tension dissolve, he applied too much pressure, and I lifted my shoulders. He immediately noticed I was no longer relaxed.

Grant removed his hands. "I'm so sorry. I told you I'm not an expert."

"That's okay. Why don't you move to my shoulders?"

Taking direction from me, his hands moved in small circles outward toward my shoulders. Although his touch was still a little too stiff, his hands felt good over my shoulders, and a calming sensation flowed through me. He stayed along the top of my shoulders, and once again, I felt the tension disappear. Then, using his thumb, he pressed along my shoulders and pinpointed an area of tension.

He asked, "Is that a knot?"

Groaning, I replied, "Oh yeah."

He used his palms in a kneading motion and worked on the knot. This time, he didn't press nearly as hard. Just enough pressure that I began to feel goosebumps. I let my head slip forward, sighing, as he continued to knead and knuckle the area of tension.

"It looks like you are starting to relax. I guess I'm not doing too bad of a job."

I whimpered and declared, "You are doing great. Don't stop."

He snickered, and commented, "I won't, but you need to lean forward a bit. I want to massage your back right now."

I really wanted a back massage, but the straps of my bra would have made it uncomfortable, so I said, "Wait."

I reached behind my back, and I slid one hand under the fabric of my blouse. I felt where the clip was and easily unhooked it.

Grant watched in amazement, and astonishedly said, "Damn, I can't do that even when I'm seeing what I'm doing."

I laughed, and replied, "Well, I've had practice, and this is the best part."

I dipped my shoulder, reached under the blouse, tugged on the bra, and pulled it out through my sleeve. When the bra was free from my blouse, I tossed it on the couch and declared, "Okay, now you can continue."

Grant was speechless, so I positioned myself again with my back very close to him. He placed both hands on my upper back, moved me a little forward, and once again placed his legs on either side of me. His hands glided down toward my lower back. He kept going up and down using his palms. He wasn't a professional, but he had me completely relaxed.

"Grant, that feels amazing."

He was doing a great job, and I was really enjoying his touch. But then Grant's hands moved towards the front of my blouse. Quickly he returned to my back, but then once again his hands moved towards my loose breasts. When he did that, I flashed back to the time that Heather and Shawna gave me a massage. Instead of feeling sad, I started feeling aroused.

I remembered Heather extending her fingers and letting her hands get closer to my nipple. My memory of me lifting myself a bit to give Heather more access to my breasts was so vivid. Grant's hands never touched my breasts, but my mind could not stop remembering. Then I remembered Shawna, also extending her fingers, and then both Heather and Shawna were brushing my nipples. They kept brushing my sensitive nipples. Then I observed that my nipples under my braless blouse were rock hard.

My mind returned to Grant, as his hands kept moving from my back to my front. He could tell I was breathing harder, and he shifted his legs so they were wrapped tighter around me. His hands were so close to my breasts. I wanted so much to give Grant full access to my breasts. But I knew if I did, this would no longer be just a massage. I had to stop this before it went too far.

I quickly said, "That was the best shoulder and back massage I ever had, but I think we need to take a break."

Grant moved his hands away from my shoulders, and asked, "Why don't you want to continue?"

I turned my head back to look at him. "Grant, we always told each other the truth. Right?"

"Of course."

"I haven't been with a guy since Justin, so we should probably stop."

At first, he had a confused look. But then he saw the hard nipples under my blouse. Then he understood, and remarked, "Oh."

He looked embarrassed.

I quickly laughed, and responded, "No big deal, and thank you. I feel a lot better now."

Although I didn't look directly at his crotch, I suspected he had also gotten excited. He confirmed my opinion when he said, "You are welcome, and the pleasure was also mine."

Wanting to change the subject, I asked, "You don't happen to have any alcohol in the apartment?"

Then Grant started to laugh and, in a very sarcastic voice, replied, "Ashley, I'm not twenty-one yet; how could I possibly have alcohol in here?" Then he walked over to the refrigerator, opened the door, and asked, "Is beer okay?"

I looked at the refrigerator, and beer was almost all that was in there. No wonder the kitchen was spotless. So, I responded, "Beer is perfect, but we better also order a pizza."

++++

"You know what I never understood, Grant?" I asked.

"There have been a lot of things you never understood, Ashley."

I was not going to let Grant bait me, and I slurred, "Whatever. What I don't get is why you've never kissed a girl by then."

The pizza was long gone, and I lost track of how many beers we'd had. After Grant's massage, we started playing drinking games. We started with two truths and a lie, and we worked up to truth or drink. Playing those games with Grant made me remember a lot of the fun times we'd had together. It also made me remember the awkward kiss we shared.

Grant may not have remembered it as clearly as I had because he asked, "What are you talking about, Ashley?"

"When we were in my bedroom the week before The Music Man opening. You were nervous about performing our stage kiss."

Grant turned red, and expressed, "I wasn't as experienced as you."

Okay, he definitely remembered.

I waited for him to say more. When he didn't, I said, "I thought you were crushing on Gina at the same time I was with Justin."

"We went to a couple of dances together, but it never got that far. Not by then, anyway."

The conversation just got interesting. We were still on the couch, sitting pretty close together. I leaned into him even closer, and asked, "When did it get that far?"

Grant pulled back just a little, and replied, "Gina and I went to a party after grad night. It was at that party."

I paused to think, trying to remember the timeline. I should have stopped drinking two beers ago. I leaned into him again, and this time, our shoulders touched. "I see. It was at this party that you kissed Gina for the first time."

Grant didn't pull back. He was still holding an almost empty bottle of beer. He tried to put the bottle down on the table next to us and missed. Instead, the bottle hit my shoulder. That made me bump into him, and my breasts smashed into his chest. Our mouths were then inches apart.

I took the beer bottle from him and put it on the table. In doing so, my breasts pressed tighter against him. I was thinking with my breasts, when I asked him, "Was she a good kisser?"

Grant paused. I knew he tolerated alcohol better than me, but he should have also stopped two beers ago. He replied, "I don't remember."

I shot back at him without thinking, "You don't remember if she was a good kisser, or you don't remember if she kissed as good as me?"

Shit! Where did that come from?

I thought Grant was going to pull back, but instead, he leaned into me. Our mouths didn't touch, but his forehead brushed mine. He was close enough that I could smell the beer on his breath.

"Ashley... I will never forget your kiss."

Those words triggered something inside me. I felt my heart race. Even after Justin. Even after Heather and Shawna. I still vividly remembered my kiss with Grant. With all the alcohol I'd drunk, it was easy to imagine kissing him again. Our lips were so close. Then something snapped.

No! I need to slow things down.

I looked at him, trying to play it cool. "The beer is making you remember things differently."

"No, Ashley, this is what I remember."

Grant wasn't going to slow down. His lips pressed against mine, and unlike our first kiss, he immediately slipped his tongue inside my mouth. His tongue danced against mine, and we kissed, hungrily. I could feel my breaths coming in little gasps, and then I heard my moan. My mind was trying to make sense of what was happening, but my body didn't care.

I was so lost in his kiss that I was not aware that Grant's hand had gone under my blouse. He was gently teasing my nipples, and another moan slipped from my mouth. The hormones in my body were raging, and if I didn't stop this right then, I was going to fuck Grant.

Suddenly, I stopped and pushed him away.

"Grant! Grant! Stop! We can't do this!"

All my previous kisses had felt magical. But this kiss? It felt like guilt. It felt confusing. It felt like it was the alcohol that was driving it. I could not risk what I had with Grant because we got drunk and acted out a fantasy.

Grant pulled back, his hands then on my shoulder. He softly said, "I know."

I didn't know how, but I felt sober all of a sudden. "I'm sorry, Grant, it's my fault again. Just like last time."

His grip on my shoulders tightened. "No! It's not your fault. Not last time. Not this time."

He continued before I could respond. "If we were not cousins, I would not have wanted to stop. I wanted both kisses as much as you did. But your parents put enough guilt on you that I know you would have regretted it. We had to stop, and it's neither our fault."

How did Grant get so smart? He was right. We stopped it before we got too far. I looked at my phone lying on the side table. I picked it up, and the time was almost midnight. I said to Grant, "You are right, of course. And thank you for stopping."

We hugged again, and I was glad we both had dodged that bullet. I pulled back and said, "It's late; I should be heading home."

Grant immediately said, "Nonsense, you're spending the night."

"I'm okay to drive."

"Yeah, right. I know I'm not okay to drive, so you are spending the night."

I got up from the couch and wobbled a bit. He may have had a point. He saw my unsteady motion, took my hand, and led me to his bedroom. It had a large king-size bed.

"I'll sleep in the living room. I've got a clean, large t-shirt you can wear. I think I even have an extra toothbrush."

Grant pulled a t-shirt from his dresser drawer and tossed it at me. The bathroom was across the hall, and he found a new toothbrush. He gave me a big smile and told me, "You get ready, and I'll get some blankets to make a bed on the couch."

I looked at the huge bed and replied, "Grant, that's silly. This is way big enough for the both of us. Besides, I don't need the extra guilt from you sleeping on the couch."

I went into the small bathroom, took off everything but my panties, and slipped on the t-shirt. It was long enough to cover my panties and had plenty of room for my boobs. After brushing my teeth, I returned to the bedroom and saw Grant on top of the sheets with an extra blanket over him.

After I got under the sheets, he said, "I guess I better go brush my teeth."

I watched him as he got up from the bed. He was only wearing his pajama bottoms as he walked into the bathroom. I must have fallen asleep right after he left, because I never heard him come back.

++++

"Grant... Grant, wake up."

"What... Oh shit! Sorry Ashley."

My mind was still foggy from last night's drinking. I had been awake for several minutes, enjoying Grant's erection pressed against the back of my t-shirt. All that was between his cock and my ass was his briefs and my panties. I was not sure how he ended up under the covers, or when he took his pajamas off, but I was glad. His arm was thrown over me, and I could feel his slow breathing against the back of my neck. I was warm and comfortable, and I didn't want to move, but I wanted him to be awake. I rolled my hips a little and I rubbed along his length to try to wake him up, but he remained asleep. That was when I told him to wake up.

Realizing the position he was in, Grant moved so he was no longer pressed against me, and I immediately felt disappointed. I didn't want Grant to move away from me. Not yet. The last time I woke up next to someone was three months ago. It was Heather when we were in Hawaii. I didn't even remember the last time I had a hard cock pressed against my ass. I was no longer drunk, but I was even hornier than last night.

When you get that way, you tend to make rash decisions. To understand what happened next, I need to explain what I was feeling.

I was still feeling lonely from losing Heather. That, combined with my fucked-up emotional state and the physical attraction I had for Grant, and I did something impulsively. That was why I asked Grant, "How do you normally take care of that?"

Grant knew exactly what 'that' was, and replied, "Normally, I would... you know."

"Yes, I do know, Grant." I brought my hands behind me and pulled Grant against me, so his cock was against my ass again, and commanded, "Take care of it, Grant."

"I don't know, Ashley. It's going to feel weird, you know... just doing it on you."

I shifted my hips again, and I felt how hard he was, and remarked, "It won't be weird if I am doing it with you. I'll even tell you about the time Heather and I hooked up for the first time while Shawna watched us."

"Okay," he whispered into my ear.

Grant's hard cock felt amazing as I began telling my story.

"It was mid-morning, and the previous night Heather went down on me for the first time. Heather and I were lying naked in bed in my dorm room. It was my turn to return the favor, and I began passionately kissing and touching Heather. Just touching her was making me feel like I was losing my mind. But touching her was not enough. I tried to put her entire large breast into my mouth, but then she shifted her position and turned me over. The weight of her body felt amazingly delightful. I began to squirm as her hairy mound pressed against my shaved cunt."

Grant immediately responded to my story. He began to move in a rapid motion as his erection ground against my ass. At this rate, he was going to cum way too soon. I wanted to slow things down a little, so I placed both hands on Grant's ass and pressed him against me. He stopped moving, and I continued with the story.

"We heard a knock on the door. It was Shawna, she stopped by unexpectedly. At least unexpectedly to me. It turns out Heather had invited Shawna to stop by. Heather was still naked and got up from the bed to open the door. Shawna looked at Heather, then saw that I was also naked and casually said, 'Please continue with whatever you two were doing, and I'll just watch.'"

Grant, once again, began to move, but much slower this time. While moving, Grant's hands began to wander, so I took Grant's hands and placed them just under my breasts, and I continued telling my story.

"At first, I was surprised that Shawna was encouraging Heather and me to continue messing around, but then she explained that from the first time she met me, she knew I had the hots for Heather, and not only did she not care, but it was a turn-on for her. That made me want to kiss Shawna. We had a long, passionate kiss, and after we broke free, I took Heather's hand and led her to the bed.

"Shawna followed us there, sat on the bed, and began to watch. As soon as we got to the bed, Heather pushed me, so my head hit my pillow. She kneeled in front of me and moved her fingers over my wet slit. Not hesitating, she inserted her fingers inside and began fingering me. First one side of my pussy, then the other. She was relentless. While two fingers were still inside me, she pressed her thumb on my clit. She kept moving her fingers in and out. Each time she moved in, she brushed my clit"

All of a sudden I stopped talking. For the first time since I had lost Heather, I was experiencing a moment of happy grief. Thinking about Heather fingering me while Shawna was watching brought back a flood of memories. Only this time, they were joyful memories. That was when I knew that the only way I was going to get closure was to just remember the good times and move on. The best way to move on was to make new memories.

My cousin noticed that I stopped speaking, so he stopped moving behind me and asked, "Why did you stop the story?"

"Because I want to think about this moment, not the past."

Then he asked, "Even if this moment is wrong?"

My cousin's words made me even more determined. Were we really doing anything wrong? Was what we were doing really bad according to God, or was it just the church's interpretation of right and wrong? My mom said that God always had a plan. What if God brought Grant to me to help me heal? It couldn't be a sin if this was God's plan. Then I made up my mind. It wasn't wrong when I masturbated for the first time. It wasn't wrong when I fell in love with Heather. It wouldn't be wrong if my cousin and I helped each other cum.

I placed my hands over Grant's hands and moved them to my breasts and told him, "What if God is watching us? What if this is God's plan and He brought you to me so I could get over my grief?"

Grant thought about what I said, and replied, "But last night, you were feeling guilty. What changed?"

The answer to me was simple. Perhaps, it was simple because I was rationalizing, but I didn't care. When you were as aroused as I was, rationalizing was easy. I told Grant, "What has changed is that I realized that it was the Catholic Church that was making me feel guilty, not God."

Grant asked, "And you are sure about this?"

"There are a lot of things I am not sure about. The only thing I know for sure is that you are the person I am closest to, and you are the only one that can help me move forward."

Grant considered all I had said, and asked, "How can I help you move away from your past?"

"By using your fingers to make me cum."

Before Grant could say anything, I disengaged from him, sat up, and turned around to face him, and I said, "To do this right, we both need to be naked. Are you okay with that?"

Grant hesitated at first, but quickly agreed by nodding his head. The head nod was good enough for me, and I reached for my t-shirt and pulled it over my head. I tossed it on the bed, and Grant saw my pert breasts rising and falling for the first time. When I was in Hawaii, Heather and I went to a nude beach, so I had no tan lines. I looked at Grant's face, and my nipples became erect as he silently stared at me.

I brought my arms up and squeezed my C-cup mounds together, and Grant finally spoke, "Ashley, those tits are perfect."

I smiled at Grant's comment and reached down to pull off my lace hipster panties. They had been damp since I'd woken up this morning, and I was glad to be able to take them off. As I slid them down my legs, Grant's eyes moved from my tits to my mound. That was when his mouth dropped open. I also looked down, and I saw what he was staring at. Before leaving for Hawaii, I had waxed, and Grant could easily see my outer lips that were slick with moisture.

I looked back up at Grant, and asked, "Is this the first time you've seen someone completely shaved?"

"Fuck, Ashley, I wasn't expecting you to be waxed. Gina's pussy is the only one I've ever seen, and hers looked nothing like yours."

I began to laugh, and replied, "Well, we're all different." Then I looked at the huge bulge in his briefs, and told him, "Okay, now your turn."

Grant lifted his butt off the bed and slipped off his underwear. I stared unashamedly as his cock sprang free. Then my cousin looked at me, waiting for my reaction. Grant's cock was only the third one I had ever seen. It was not as long as Justin's or as thick as Ted's but impressive, nonetheless. Knowing how important it was for him to hear that, I said, "Wow! Very massive."

I was more than ready to begin, and I spread my legs out, and directed to Grant, "Place your legs over mine and scoot closer so you can touch me."

We were then sitting only inches apart, and Grant reached across and brought one hand towards my mound. He was very tentative at first, cupping my pussy with the palm of his hand. I could tell he did not have a lot of experience at this, so I took his hand in mine and spread his fingers apart.

"Here, start with two fingers, like this."

I brought two of his fingers to my outer lips and guided him over my slit. He had an intense look on his face as I let go of his hand and he started exploring my folds. I slowly breathed in and out, enjoying the feel of his fingers. I loved how his fingers slid over my wetness, but I was ready for him to explore another part of me. Once again, I placed my hand over his, and I held his middle finger and used it to trace along the edge of my entrance, until he reached a defined nub near the top, and I said, "That is my clit."

Grant immediately said, "I know where the clit is; Gina made sure of that!"

He pressed hard on my button, and a wave of tingles began vibrating through me. I was not ready for that much intensity, so I moved his fingers back to the edge of my entrance. I brought his two middle fingers together, and I helped him plunge his fingers inside me. Without warning, I experienced a shortness of breath and began panting as Grant took over, and he slipped his fingers further inside me. I didn't know how many times Grant had done this to Gina, but I was sure he no longer needed my help. I closed my eyes and enjoyed the feeling of his fingers exploring the inside of my cunt. As he moved in and out, all I could do was let out lustful grunts and moans.

I was getting close to coming, and I brought my hands to my breasts. I squeezed them so hard that red marks appeared on them. Then I used my fingers to pinch and twist my nipples. The sensation of my cousin fingering me and my fingers on my nipples almost made me cum, but then I opened my eyes and saw that Grant was stroking himself. It wasn't rapid, but a slow stroke that was keeping him hard. I took one hand away from my breast and slowly moved it towards his cock. Grant let go of his dick, but still had his hand inside me. Then our eyes locked.

He was my cousin, but I didn't care.

I told Grant, "Let's make each other cum."

I grasped his cock just below the head and slowly moved my hand down his shaft. I smiled, and exclaimed, "So fucking hard!"

With our eyes still locked, we started to move together. I had a firm grip on his cock, and Grant moved his fingers in and out of my pussy at a steady pace. I opened up my legs even wider and moved closer to Grant so he could easily move his fingers deeper inside. Grant knew what to do, and he slowly eased his finger inside me until the last knuckle rubbed my opening. It felt amazing. My arousal was obvious, and Grant could see my wetness dripping around his fingers. Grant began to move a little faster, and my body shook.

I was still pumping Grant's cock, and Grant began to pant. I did not want Grant to cum too fast, so I ran my fingers up the length of his cock until I reached the top. I swept my thumb across the tip to gather the fluid that was there, and his cock jumped and throbbed. Then I continued to move my up and down his shaft, but at a slower pace.

We both kept going. My hand on his throbbing erection, his hand inside of me. Then we both increased our pace at the same time. I saw that Grant's other hand was on the bed, and I thought of a way that Grant could give even more stimulation.

"Grant, remember where my clit was? Use your other hand and touch it."

Gina must have taught him well because before he touched my clit, he used his index finger to trace my folds, and that got the finger wet. Then he brought his index finger to my nub and began to rub the clit in small circles. I let out a loud moan as then both of his hands were giving me pleasure. The combination of the friction inside me and the stimulation of my clit felt so good that I was trembling as my orgasm continued to build.

I screamed for the first time, and then yelled, "Oh please, oh please, just like that!"

I also gripped Grant's cock tighter and moved my hands even faster. This caused Grant to say, "This feels so fucking good. Just keep going."

I kept stroking him, and I knew that it wouldn't be long for Grant to cum, and I could also feel that rush you get just before exploding. My orgasm was building like an uncontrolled flood, powerful and dripping wet. I was distantly aware that I was still stroking Grant as I concentrated on feeling between my legs. Then I heard Grant yell, "I'm going to cum!"

My eyes focused on his dick as he shot a thick rope of cum into the air. It flew up, and it just missed me, landing on the sheets. I thought he was done, but he jerked again, and this time, a smaller load spattered on my boobs.

Even though Grant just came, two fingers were still inside me. I let go of his cock and concentrated again on what I was feeling and yelled, "Don't stop! I'm almost there!"

Grant then guided a third finger inside me. His hand was thrusting in and out as fast as it could.

I encouraged him by saying, "Curl your fingers a little more; try to find my G-spot."

He found something, because I jerked and yelled, "Oh yeah, fuck yeah! Keep it right there!"

I began to rock on the bed, pressing my vulva onto and around his fingers, coming again and again. My chest rose and fell as I gasped, trying to get air. My face was contorted into something unexplainable. It was almost as if I'd been possessed by demons. Then, when I thought I was about to die, my tremors subsided, and I started to breathe normally again. It was an orgasm that seemed to go on for an eternity, but it was then over, and I placed my hand on Grant's hand to make him stop.

It was the perfect orgasm. It did everything it was supposed to do. Although I could never forget Heather, I would be able to move forward. So why was I feeling something I didn't understand? My cousin was sitting across from me, and we were both silent for a minute or two. I looked at him, and I knew I had to say something. After all, I was the one who started us on this path.

"Are we okay?" I asked.

"Oh, yeah. That was the most intense thing I've ever done," he replied.

"That's not what I meant, Grant. I just want to know that you were okay with the line we crossed."

"Oh. We are both adults. No one else needs to know."

Well, I was sure as hell not going to tell my parents about this. The truth was that my guilt had been washed away. I couldn't care less about the Church's judgment. So, if I wasn't feeling guilt for what we had just done, what was this feeling that I didn't understand?

Then it came to me. I was developing feelings towards Grant beyond the sex we just had. Well, there was no way I could let that happen, so I immediately squashed those feelings. I was not sure what would happen tomorrow. I didn't know how this morning would affect the closeness Grant and I had. But, right then, looking at Grant, I didn't really care. I wasn't ready to open my heart. Not just yet. We may never do this again, and that was okay with me.

Grant kept looking at me, waiting for a reply, and I finally said, "You are right, what we did is not something we are going to share." Then I touched the cum that was still on my breasts, and added, "But it was something that was messy. Do you care if I go take a shower?"

Grant gave me a big smile. "Of course, I don't care. Do you want me to join you?"

I actually considered it for about three seconds, but I knew better. "I think I should shower alone."

Grant looked disappointed, but he agreed, saying, "You're right. There is a donut shop around the corner. By the time you get out of the shower, I'll be back, and I'll have your breakfast ready."

I took a long, leisurely shower, going over the events of last night and this morning. By the time I dried off and got dressed, I had decided that I was going to find a new third roommate and go on with my life. I stepped out of the bedroom, and true to his word, there was Grant with an assortment of donuts and beverages.

Grant looked at my confused look as I walked toward the table, and exclaimed, "I didn't know what you liked."

I picked up a maple bar and opened a Diet Coke, and we quietly sat, eating our breakfast.

After a while, Grant said, "I suppose you will be going back to college next month."

"I am. Dad bought a condo for me to stay in, and I really do want to be a teacher someday." Then I asked him, "What about you, Grant? Are you going to continue to work for your father?"

"I am, Ashley. Right now, I'm the assistant manager at one of the locations, and once I graduate from junior college, my dad said I can eventually be promoted to a store manager."

"That's great, Grant. I am so glad that you found something that you really enjoy doing."

"And I forgot to tell you. We've gotten big enough that we are looking to hire corporate trainers to train our new employees. Maybe someday, when you get your teaching degree and I'm running the company, you can come to work for me."