Strokes of Desire, Whispers of Harm

The weight of his hand on my throat nearly made me smile. I wasn't supposed to smile. Fear was what he was after, but he simply didn't evoke that from me.

I trusted him.

He guided me back against the wall beside my bedroom, his grip firm and gait steady. An attempt at stoicism was made, but one corner of his lips curved upward, and his eyes seemed full of lust as he held my gaze and tightened his hand.

My fingers were on his wrist; I should've been pulling it, feigning fear for him, but I couldn't manage it. I was exactly where I wanted to be. That's okay, though. He wasn't supposed to be here for a few more days. We were only supposed to have a weekend, not an entire week together. Not long enough to get attached beyond the physical. That's what we'd agreed to. And he changed that on me, so I could change this on him. Fair's fair.

His thumb caressed the side of my neck, and I bit my lip as his eyes took me in. I didn't think it would take the full week for me to get attached. The promised weekend would've sufficed, I was certain of it.

"Aren't you scared?" he asked. His voice was deep, enunciation clear. He'd mentioned schooling in England despite being a second-generation American, and I could hear that in his accent. It was so slight, but alluring.

"No." I sounded more confident than I'd expected to under the circumstances. I should've been scared. We hadn't interacted in person before. He was strong, surprisingly so, but there was comfort in how he pulled his strength with me. That restraint had been evident from the moment his palm lay against the front of my neck.

His gaze lowered to my throat-which pulsed with my increasing heart rate-then fell along my chest. His grip tightened, and my cheeks flushed.

He wasn't choking me. Though his grip was firm, it was calculated as a means of control, not harm.

"Do you want to be afraid of me?" he asked as his gaze caught mine again.

I nodded as best I could; the movement was stifled with his hand wrapping my throat.

The soft light behind him made his features seem darker than they were, a little sinister. Extremely attractive with his somewhat wavy, short, dark brown hair and equally dark emotive eyes. He was well-built. Lithe but not weak. Muscular and tall. Exquisite in the way his blazer fit him perfectly. The band T-shirt beneath was snug across his chest, black jeans perfectly tailored to suit his shape and height, falling lightly over his black leather shoes. Tailored jeans; he clearly had more money than I did.

I lifted my chin, letting the light catch my eyes, "Make me afraid, Raj."

He closed his eyes, and the smile he'd been straining to conceal broke free. "You have such a pleasing way of saying that."

"Raj?" I intentionally added a breathy tone to his nickname, and his eyes opened, lifting to meet my gaze.

"Pernicious desires shouldn't be encouraged, Katie."

I smiled and trailed my fingers along his forearm as I arched my eyebrow and said, "Do you want to harm me?"

His hand tightened on my neck, causing an ache within me. "I want to hurt you, slowly. Over time. In a way that you won't even notice. In a way you won't always enjoy." He moved closer to me. His other hand trailed over my body and lingered at my breast, my thin silk blouse the only barrier between us. "Would you like that?"

I didn't really understand what he meant. How would I not notice? I was sure I would enjoy it; I'd enjoyed everything so far. The depth of his voice, the heft of his touch, and the warmth of his breath on my skin all worked together to force a tingle through my body. I just nodded, and he leaned forward before pressing his lips to my neck, just below my ear. It was a gentle kiss, light; the flick of his tongue on my skin between his parted lips gave me a chill, causing my nipples to harden beneath the soft fabric covering them.

His fingers trailed along the swell of my breast, slowing at my nipple. He traced his thumb around then over me, pressing a little more firmly across my nipple as he raked his teeth along my neck and lowered his grip on me. His palm lay against my collarbone, but his fingers still curled around my slender neck, rubbing and caressing as he bit down and evoked a moan from me.

He pulled back and smiled before again his mouth was on my neck, and I felt him bite harder. I brought my hands to his wrist, holding onto him as my legs trembled and my breath caught. My head instinctively tipped to the side, giving him better access to bite and kiss along the sensitive line he'd found.

It was impossible not to whine as he pulled his teeth from me. His body pressed to mine, pushing me against the wall, his palms firmly slid over me as his lips locked onto me. I returned his kiss with a greedy need; in my head, I allowed him the kiss, I encouraged it. But the reality was he stole it. Whether I wanted that kiss or not, he would've taken it from me, and that was evident in the force behind it.

I whimpered, my pulse quickening, and his hand slid up my inner thigh beneath the short wool skirt I wore. While I wanted to pull out of the kiss, he held me against the wall with his body. His head tilted slightly. The pressure behind his lips forced my head against the wall. It wasn't comfortable, but I knew myself held. I liked it.

There was no seeking consent. No questioning if he should stop. His fingers played over my vulva, his middle finger slipping down the center, a single rough stroke across my clit, then pushed forward until his invading digit was inside of me. My hips moved toward him, and his knee lifted between my thighs, forcing my legs open just a little wider for him.

He groaned, it was breathy and exuded a sense of pleasure, then continued the deep kiss he'd trapped me in. My hands moved from his wrist to shoulders, half-pushing him back to relieve the pressure on my lips and half-caressing along his sturdy body.

After only a few strokes, he added another finger to me, and I shuddered; my hands gripped his shoulders for support and my knees practically buckled. A whimper, a whine, a gasp forced against his mouth as he moved quick and hard inside of me. The evidence of my arousal was audible to both of us.

Then his thumb circled my clit, and my hands moved quickly down to his wrist, trying to push him away from me before he got me off. It made him more insistent. His gaze was intense as he pulled back and watched me.

My brow arched, drawing together as I gasped. He wasn't smiling. More like observing my reaction to his aggression. The flush of my cheeks and neck must've been clearly evident, as the heat threatened to overwhelm me. His fingers slowed, "Are you going to come for me, Katie? Already?"

I tried to fight it, but his thumb was so lightly caressing my clit as his fingers rubbed and pushed along my inner wall, slower but firmly. How did I answer his question when I didn't know the answer? I felt like I might, but I also thought that if I said that, he would stop, and I didn't want him to stop.

His thumb slowed too, and I moaned, then forced myself to respond, "Maybe? I don't know... Yes? Please?"

As I feared, his hand stopped and pulled away from me. Dammit, I should've said no. My hand tightened on his wrist, trying to hold him to me, but he easily twisted loose. His movement was casual as he brought his other hand up to my cheek, "Tell me I can have you however I want," he said as his fingertips stroked along my skin before slipping into my hair and tightening into a painful fist.

"Raj," I whined. He pulled my hair a little rougher, making me wince as he smiled. "Yes. Yes, you can have me however you want. Please have me however you want!"

"Unfasten my jeans." His eyes easily held my gaze as I fumbled, reaching and feeling for his waistband without looking. His jeans opened easily, and he groaned as my hand barely grazed against him. "Take my cock out."

Following his orders was easy. He was hard and already pushing against his soft boxers. My hand slipped in, fingers curving beneath him and guiding him from the confines. Then he stroked his cock, the slick sounds indicated he must've still had some of the viscous fluid from fingering me on his hand. That was confirmed when his hand slid over mine and tightened.

My eyes were locked on his. I hadn't even seen what his cock looked like yet, simply heard the soft wetness and felt his hand stroke down over mine beneath him. He guided me in a stroking motion, slow and firm. His intense focus on my face threatened to make me look away, but I felt he was looking for something, some reaction from me, perhaps? The skin felt looser than I was used to. It drew my attention as I lowered my gaze and swallowed the growing lump in my throat

He tugged on my hair, drawing my eyes back to his as he guided my hand.

"Good," he moaned, his expression fierce, unsmiling. His hand came away from mine, but I continued stroking him along the same rhythm. He caught my lips in another passionate kiss as he forced my head against the wall once again and lowered one hand between my legs. His other slid out of my hair, down my silky shirt and cupped my breast through the fabric. It was a wonderful sensation, and I moaned against his lips.

His lips pulled away from mine, his voice breathy, "Good girl," he moaned. "Now on your knees."

I slid down, and his hands lowered, grasping the hem of my shirt as I moved to my knees. The shirt came up, and I lifted my hands, letting go of his cock for a moment as he pulled my shirt from my body.

Raj's hand tightened in my hair again, pulling my head back, causing me to arch uncomfortably, lifting my breasts as I did so. He bit his lip as he looked me over. "Stroke me."

My hand wrapped around him and moved gently. I could've moved faster, cupped his balls, and massaged him until he came, but I didn't. He watched me bite my lip as I stroked his cock for him. I pressed my thighs together and whimpered as he pulled my head toward him.

"Open."

I parted my lips, and he smiled but shook his head, "Yes, that too, but I meant your thighs. Open them for me. Touch yourself while you suck me."

My legs spread, and my hand left his cock, slipping between my own thighs instead. I was slick as my fingers penetrated me. At the same time, my lips closed over his cock. He shuddered as I tightened my lips around him.

"Gently," he instructed me, his hand grasping the back of my neck.

I let up on the pressure and curved my tongue beneath his shaft. His other hand curled in my hair, just behind my ear. He guided my mouth over him, and I let him. I was surprised he kept me shallow, his cock was still covered by the sheath of foreskin I wasn't used to. My tongue slid beneath the skin, and I lifted my eyes to him.

His expression was intense. It seemed full of lust and desire, and it caused me to clench around my own finger. I desperately wanted to fuck him; two fingers weren't enough, but adding a third would've been awkward as I knelt with my legs spread. His cock head was barely in my mouth as he guided me over him. I let my thumb rub along my clit, making my thighs tense as he began to pull my head further down on him.

The way his skin moved over his shaft was different; it created a soft layer over the stiff shaft and kept the firm and purple-hued head mostly hidden beneath. He pulled his cock from my mouth. The slick precum lingered on the tip and brushed over my lip. His hands on the back of my head urged me up. My hand came from between my legs, and he smiled as he saw the slickness coating my fingers.

Back on my feet, he turned me away from him and pushed me against the wall. My palms flattened against the dark blue paint. It was cold against my breasts, but the warmth of his lips along the back of my shoulder and neck managed to stave off chills from the temperature. They did nothing to quell the chills radiating outward from my core.

He put one hand on the back of my neck, and the other grasped my hip, pulling my lower body away from the wall and close enough to him to feel his heat. His hand left my hip, and in a moment, I felt him pushing his cock against me. I moaned and lifted my hips a little higher, standing on my tip-toes to give him a better view and angle to penetrate me. He flipped my skirt up over my hips, baring my ass to him.

In a quick thrust of his cock, he pushed against a sensitive wall inside of me. I whimpered and curled my hands into fists. The strength of him lifted me just that much higher with each forward thrust.

He still kissed my neck, and one hand gripped my hair, pulling my head back. "Rub yourself," he reminded me.

One of my hands slid between my thighs, and the other cupped my bare breast as his body slammed mine tighter against the wall, causing me to clench around him. He bit the side of my neck and sucked on it, flicking his tongue over my skin as he pulled my hair. I shuddered and gasped at his sudden, brutal, forward thrust, which made my knees buckle.

His hands swiftly moved to my hips and held me up. "That's it," he moaned as he continued his deep, hard thrusts into me even as I contracted in orgasm.

I couldn't moan, couldn't whimper; no oxygen was entering my lungs as he set off a second orgasm for me. A particularly forceful thrust made my legs tremble. My hands moved back up to the wall, curling into fists as I finally drew in a deep breath. I moaned before I managed to say, "Fuck me harder, Raj," with an especially breathy tone on his name.

He listened. He obeyed. The clapping of our bodies echoed in the otherwise silent room, and I shuddered beneath his grip. His use of me was divine. His needs were painful and beautiful at the same time.

"Yes, Katie, such a fucking good girl," his own breathy tone let my name escape him.

I felt him stiffen a little more before he thrust hard enough that I cried out, "Yes! God, Raj, yes! Come in me. Claim me as yours."

He moaned, his lips closed against my skin behind my jaw and in front of my ear, "You sure you want it like this?"

I nodded and pushed my butt out a little further. There wasn't another ask. He grasped my hips and pulled my body back to him as he twitched and filled me with his cum. The rush of heady lust was intense, and we both slid down the wall to the floor. He lay over me, kissing the side of my neck and running his hands over my body.

"You understand that I'm not going to want to go home now, right?" he asked, his breathing labored, making him pause between words.

I looked over my shoulder, a broad smile on my face, "Oh, no, how horrible. Guess we'll just have to fuck in every room of my apartment then. Loud and hard. Make my neighbors blush when I leave with that freshly-fucked glow on my skin."

He chuckled, his hands rubbing my back, "I have a job to get back to. Not wanting to go home doesn't mean I don't go home."

I sighed, my head lowered to my arms and I nodded. "And that's how you'll hurt me."

His fingers were gentle, dancing lightly along my skin as he pushed my hair away from my face on one side. I looked over my shoulder at him, and he nodded, a sorrowful look on his face as he said, "And that's how I'll hurt you in a way you won't like. Slowly. Over time. You won't even notice or feel the true weight of it until I'm gone."

A tear ran down my cheek, and he wiped it away before kissing me softly. "And so it begins," he whispered as he pulled away from me.