Paid in Flesh Pt. 01

"I'm 100$ short."

There was no way around, I just had to come out and say. It's not like he wouldn't count the money and just take my word for it.

"I can have it by the end of the week."

Yeah, that was a lie, there was no way I could come up with an extra hundred by the end of the week.

"My car broke down last week. I had to get new parts for it, otherwise I can't get to my job."

That wasn't a lie. If I didn't prioritise my car I couldn't get to my job and then I couldn't pay any of the rent. He opened the envelope and started counting the money inside. He still hadn't said anything.

"Please, don't kick me out, man, I got nowhere else to go."

He raised a finger to shut me up and continued to count the small bills in the envelope in silence.

"Let's go inside and talk," he finally said when he was done counting.

We went in. This was the first time he entered my apartment since he rented it to me. I say apartment, it was more like a chicken coop. It was a small room which functioned as a bedroom, living room and kitchen. If I laid down on the floor with my feet pressed on one wall and my arms barely stretched above me, I could easily touch the opposing wall. There was also a bathroom so tiny that I had to shit with the door open in order to be able to open my legs a little.

Surprisingly, this wasn't the worst accommodations I'd had. My parents kicked me out as soon as I turned 18. Which, after a whole life of abuse, was actually a blessing. I managed to couch hop with a few of my more understanding classmates' families until I finished high school, but these were poor people, too. I say couch hop, but most of the times I slept on a sleeping bag in a hallway. For two weeks I even slept in a bathtub. But I did manage to finish high school, at least I had that.

However, once I finished high school I no longer had this network. All of my friends left home, either for college or to go work somewhere else. At first, I rented a room in a shared apartment, closer to the city, thinking that if I could get faster to my job I could maybe even get a second job. Or at least have some time for myself. But my roommates were really shady and I didn't want to end up in jail just because I shared a space with them. I slept in the backroom at one of my jobs until they found me and fired me. I slept on a bench in the park for a couple of weeks. Slept like a rabbit, always with an eye open so I don't get stabbed or, again, thrown in jail.

And then I found this place. It was a 2-hour drive to my job, but I could afford it and I had a little bit of privacy. So, yeah, not the worst by far. I still slept fearing that one of my neighbours would break in in the middle of the night, that's why I tried to advertise how piss poor I was and that there was nothing to be stolen in my apartment. But some of them had those crazy eyes and I still jumped at every creak and bump I heard in the night.

Jobs were equally difficult to come by. In the last year I worked as a dishwasher, an apprentice mechanic, a dishwasher again, as one of those guys dressed as a chicken who stand in the street with a sign that advertises a fast food joint. I carried construction materials and dug ditches on a site. I scooped a few dead animals off the road. Now I was a dishwasher again.

Now you're all caught up on my life story. So, here I was, literally a day late and hundred dollars short on my rent and contemplating sleeping in my car.

David and I sat on my bed, simply because there was nowhere else to sit. David was my landlord. Landlord sounds like such a majestic word. You say landlord and you imagine vast expanses of meadows and forests which an old nobleman inspects on horseback. Instead, David was 30-ish, if I had to guess, and owned a few rundown buildings in what used to be an industrial park. He rented chicken coops to dishwashers and street sweepers. He fought to kick out the occasional tweaker that made it through his screening. I don't think we interacted much past our first meeting. He showed up every two weeks to collect rent. I guess he didn't trust us a whole month (and rightly so, given my current situation). He knocked on your door, you gave him an envelope, he counted the money and moved on. No words were spoken beyond "Hello" and "Goodbye", if that. He seemed like an all right dude, but I guess I was going to find out.

He opened the envelope and took another peek inside.

"What happened to your car?"

"The alternator broke down. With labour, it cost about 500$."

"And you couldn't postpone it?"

"If I don't have a car, I can't get to work. And then I'd have no money at all to put in that envelope."

"Is your car gonna break down again next month?"

"No, man. I mean, I hope not. Look, I'm not lying, I can show you the invoice."

He pondered for a second.

"Look, you've been here six months. You seem like a good tenant. You always paid on time till now and nobody complained about you. I don't like losing a good tenant. So you can pay me the hundred that you owe next time. You can pay it next time, right?"

"Yes, I can definitely pay next time. Oh, thanks so much, man, you're a godsend." I was so happy I could give him a hug, but I contained myself and just squeezed his shoulder. He looked at my hand, acknowledging the squeeze. Shit, was that weird?

I thought we were done, but he remained seated on my bed. After a few moments he spoke again.

"So, do you live alone here?"

"Yeah, definitely."

"Don't worry, I'm not going to increase your rent if you don't. So no girlfriend?"

"Nah, man."

"Or boyfriend?"

"Nah, I'm not gay. Just single. I mean, I guess you could be gay and single, but I'm not. Gay, I mean."

Truth is, I hadn't had a girlfriend since high school. With what money would I take someone out? And where would I bring her afterwards? Luckily, porn was free and it didn't care what my room looked like.

There was another pause.

"How old are you?"

"Almost twenty."

"So nineteen?"

"Yeah."

He paused again and pondered.

"Listen, Alex, I'm gonna say something that's gonna sound a bit out there, but just know that none of it will affect your being able to stay here, okay?"

Oh, my god, he was gonna ask me to sell drugs for him, wasn't he? He waited for me to be in a vulnerable position where I couldn't say no. Fuck, I am going to sleep in my car tonight.

"I have a deal with some of the tenants."

Yup, selling drugs, what did I tell you?

"Some of the female tenants."

Oh, okay...?

"I have a deal with some female tenants where they get a discount on the rent for sexual favours. Fifty off if they blow me, a hundred if they let me fuck them."

"Well, good for you, man. That sounds... awesome."

This is a weird flex. I didn't need to know any this. Why is he telling me this? Does he want us to be friends or what's going in here?

"I don't mind getting my dick sucked by a guy either, it's just... I never found any of my male tenants attractive enough until now."

Buddy, you're oversharing. But I guess you did just give me a pass on the rent being short so I guess I'll pretend to be interested in your stories. Wait, should I share something, too? Though it's been so long since I've had a blow job, I barely remember how one feels.

"But you're kinda cute."

Wait... what?

"Now, remember, I'm not saying you have to do anything you don't want."

Whoa, whoa, stop it right there, buddy.

"I'm not gonna kick you out if you refuse."

Don't say it. Don't you fucking say it.

"But if you were interested, I might extend the same offer to you, as well."

What the fuck? No. Just no.

Long seconds passed as I stared at him. Must have been a good 10 seconds before I realised that he was waiting for me to reply and that I should say something back.

"Uh..." That's all that I could utter.

"You're in a bit of a shock, I get it. You didn't expect me to say any of this and now you're afraid that if you say no I'll kick you out. Let me be clear, I'm not going to do that. I'm not blackmailing you, I'm not trying to pressure you into doing something you don't want to do. You can still give me what you owe next time. I'm not even going to mention this again. We won't talk about it ever again, we'll just go back to how things were. Although that would be a damn shame. You have such a pretty mouth."

I just stood there with my pretty mouth half open, unable to say anything back.

"Ok, I'm gonna go now. Think it over on your own and if you find that you are interested, text me. And since I imagine this is your first time, I'm willing to give you the whole hundred off."

He smiled at me and squeezed my shoulder. And then, he was gone.

***

I spent the rest of the evening trying to play some Warzone, but I kept running out into the open and getting myself sniped. As much as I tried to think about anything else, all I could think about was my conversation with David.

I kept huffing and puffing in my mind at the ludicrousness of the idea. Like what made him think that I would say yes to that? Do I act gay without knowing it? How would he even know how I act, we've never spoken for more than 1 minute. And did I not specifically say I was not gay? Not that there's anything wrong with it. But I'm not.

I never thought about guys like that. Ok, once. But that was a weird situation. Back in the day, when I was sleeping on the floor at a buddy's house, one night it was too cold so he told me I could sleep in bed with him. I woke up in the middle of the night with him spooning me and his erect dick nestled between my ass cheeks. I don't know if he was awake or if he hugged me in his sleep. I tried to ignore it, but I did get a little hard from that sensation of closeness.

But I didn't touch his dick. I mean, my ass cheeks touched it, but I didn't touch it. I didn't grab it or anything. I didn't fantasise about it. I just got a little hard. It was just a reaction, okay? And, anyway, David didn't know about it. So why did he think it was ok to ask me that?

The nerve of him calling me "cute". And calling my mouth "pretty". What a fucking perv. I mean, what does he even want me to do? Get down on my knees like a submissive bitch? Undo his pants and grab his dick? Jerk it until it gets hard? Then start kissing it, licking it? Put it in my mouth and suck it? Is he gonna grab my head and fuck my mouth? Push his dick down my throat and choke me? Cum in my mouth? Does he expect me to swallow?

Fuck, why am I running this play-by-play in my head? And why am I picturing myself doing it? Why am I not punching him in balls or biting his dick off? And why am I so angry? I shouldn't even let it affect me. After all, he asked and I said no. That's that. It would be nice not to have to take another hundred out of my paycheck for rent though.

I went to bed determined to put this weird evening behind me. I opened my porn site of choice and went straight to the lesbian section. I needed to wash my brain with as much pussy as possible. I started scrolling through videos. Seen it. Seen it. I know her, she's way too noisy. That looks like fake squirting. Seen it. Oh, hello, who is this? I came across a thumbnail with a girl that I'd never seen before. A petite blonde, with tiny tits and plump red lips. I opened the video and my dick got instantly hard. It was one of those homemade videos, filmed handheld by one of the protagonists. The blonde was deep into another girl's pussy. The video was shot POV style, the other girl was holding the camera and was filming the blonde licking her clit with enthusiasm. It was like she was licking my pussy. I started to jerk off frantically. I'm sure the blonde was putting on a show for the video, but there was a real earnestness to her. She looked like she enjoyed licking pussy just as much in real life. And she was so hot. Unfortunately, I barely got a rhythm going when the video stopped. Damn it, it was one of those 1 minute videos.

I scrolled down to the similar videos section. There was a part 2, another minute of the same scene. It was just as hot, but, sadly, 1 minute was not enough. I scrolled to another recommended video. There was a video of the same blonde, sucking dick, filmed in the same style. This one was 5 minutes long, that should be enough, given how aroused the first video made me. It started mid blowjob. The little cumslut was already down to the balls, working her mouth and throat around that cock. She was so pretty, her blue eyes looking up at the camera, looking up at me. She tried to come up for air, but the guy grabbed her head and forced her down until she started choking and tearing up. When he released her, a puddle of saliva flowed out of her pretty cumslut mouth. What an asshole. I never understood why they always filmed that in porn? Was it really that pleasurable? I wondered how the girl felt about it. Did she like it? Did she like having a dick shoved down her throat? Did she enjoy the submissiveness? The fact that the guy seemed to enjoy it? Was she taking pleasure in giving him pleasure?

The more I looked in her eyes as she was going up and down on that dick, the more I wondered how she felt doing that. There's a certain level of enjoyment that you just can't fake, no matter how much they pay you or how many dicks you sucked. And she really seemed to enjoy it. The more I watched her lips sucking on that hard dick the more I started putting myself in her place. I stopped imagining she was sucking my dick, instead I imagined I was that little cumslut sucking a dick. I could taste the lipstick on my lips, I could feel blonde strands of hair escaping from behind my ears. I put the phone on the bed and leaned it against a pillow in order to free my other hand. I started rubbing my thumb over my lips as I was jerking off. I kissed the tip of my thumb lightly, then licked it. I took it all in my mouth and I started sucking on it, swirling my tongue around it. A few seconds later I came, just as the guy in the video was cumming in the cumslut's mouth. Without thinking about it, I scooped my sperm from the base of my cock and from my belly and licked my fingers clean. It wasn't something I regularly did, but it wasn't the first time either. I watch her play with the sperm in her mouth and I did the same. I'd never done that. I liked the feeling of coating the inside of my mouth with my sperm. The taste did nothing for me, but the velvety texture draping my mouth was quite arousing. I watched her swallow and I swallowed, too. She smiled and so did I.

I opened the messaging app on my phone, looked David up and texted him one word: "Ok." A couple of seconds later came the reply: "Tomorrow, same time." I fell asleep.

***

I woke up next morning, relishing the fact that it was my day off. I was looking forward to a whole day of zombie killing or some such. Ah, good times. However, as I was peeing I suddenly remembered what I did last night. Fuck! FUUUCK!!! Why did I do that? How could I do that? You're supposed to have clarity post-nut, not text guys agreeing to suck their dick.

What do I do? What the fuck do I do? I'll just text him back. I'll say the text was meant for someone else. No, that's too obvious of a lie. I'll say I changed my mind. Yeah, that's it, I'll just tell him the truth. I changed my mind. After all, he did tell me that there was no pressure to accept. But a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks. Oh, my god, get it together, my guy. A hundred bucks is not a hundred bucks if you have to suck dick for it. But that blonde really seemed to enjoy it. And sucking on my thumb was kinda erotic. Yeah, your thumb, not your dick. And definitely not someone else's dick.

I sat on the toilet defeated. What the fuck do I do? I mean, last night I was ready to do it. What's different now? If only I knew what it was like to suck a dick. But that meant I'd actually have to suck a dick. Hey, maybe I can try to suck mine. I've seen people do it. Yeah, I know, in porn videos. But still, it's possible. And I'm thin as a noodle. I bet you I could do it.

I went back in the room and laid down on the bed. I took off my boxers and threw my legs over my shoulders. Shit, I need to get hard first. I put my feet down and starting pulling on my dick. I got hard surprisingly quick. I thought it would take longer given the fact that I was gonna try and suck it. I threw my feet back over my shoulders again and try to reach down (up?). But with all my efforts, I couldn't quite make it. Dang it, those people in porn do have dicks bigger than mine, I guess. I strained as much as I could, but all I could do was barely lick the head. It didn't taste any different than my thumb to be honest. I started jerking off hoping that an extra inch would somehow magically appear. It didn't, but I did manage to get a little closer. I could now kiss the tip.

I swirled my tongue over the head of my penis, as much as I could reach whilst continuing to jerk off. Did it feel like sucking a dick or having my dick sucked? Actually, a little bit of both. I teased my pee hole with my tongue. I don't remember any former girlfriend ever doing that, but it was as far as I could reach and it felt quite nice. As for the taste, yeah, it tasted like skin, there was nothing actually gross about it. Although, it was my own penis. Like, I don't mind sucking my own thumb, but I wouldn't suck another guys thumb. As I continued to jerk off and lick the tip of penis, I ended up getting quite into it. Soon enough, I was getting close and before I realised the compromising position in which I was, I started cumming. So there I was, laying on my back, with my dick hovering over my head, spewing cum onto my face. Although my first instinct was to go "yuck", it felt kinda erotic. Even if I knew it was coming, when that first jet splashed me in the face, I was still surprised and instead of being grossed out, I felt kinda kinky. Even kinkier when I licked the cum off my lips. I scooped the rest off my face with my fingers and put it in my mouth. I played around with it. I remembered the feeling from the previous night and it was just as arousing now as it was then. I finally swallowed it all. I did not imagine that this is where my morning was gonna go.

Maybe sucking dick for a hundred bucks wasn't the worst thing in the world. But, seeing as I was an avid watcher of dick sucking porn, I knew there was extra hurdle to overcome. The gag reflex. I put two fingers in my mouth and started licking them with my tongue. After I got them nice and wet, I started bobbing my head up and down on them. I alternated between sucking them and taking them out of my mouth and licking them, just like you do with a dick. It really didn't feel like that big of a deal. I put them back in my mouth and started sucking on them again, each time pushing them further back into my mouth. Things were going well until I reached the back of my mouth and... Huaaaack! I wretched real hard and instantly felt like I was about to puke. My mouth flooded with saliva and my eyes watered. Shit, I barely even got to the back of my throat. And with only two fingers, which are probably thinner than a dick.

This was something I needed to work on if I wanted it to happen. It's funny in retrospect how my mind slowly moved during the course of that morning from "I'm not doing that" to "how can I make it happen." I opened up my laptop and googled "how do you train your gag reflex". Okay, let's see. We can do this.

Use a toothbrush and brush the back of your tongue. Okay, that sounds simple enough.

Take slow, deep breaths through your nose. Cool, cool, cool.

Squeeze your thumb or tap your foot. Okay, weird, but doable.

It may take time and practice to desensitize your gag reflex, so be patient with yourself. Fuck! Anything else?

Short-term ways... local anesthetic. Off to the drugstore, I guess.

About one hour and an awkward conversation with the pharmacist later, I was back home. The pharmacist asked me what I needed it for, I got flustered, made up a story about how I scratched the back of my throat and it kinda hurts, but not really, it's just that I can't put anything in the back of my throat, I mean food, not anything else and so on. By the time I was done, I guess he knew what I was looking for judging by his smirk.

"No more than three puffs, even if it still... hurts," he said with a wink, "it either works or it doesn't. And if you have to reapply, wait at least 30 minutes."

Well, now I had to worry that it won't work. So, I got home anxious, ran to the bathroom and went straight for three puffs. I had to make sure that it was gonna help. I waited for it to go numb and started sucking on my fingers again. When I hit the back of my throat there was still a Huack!, but much more manageable than before. I started adding in some of the other techniques, a bit of breathing control, a bit of thumb squeezing and, after a bit of practice, I felt confident that I was not going to puke on David's dick. What the hell am I talking about, David's dick? I'm not gonna go through with this, am I? I looked at my phone, it was already 1 PM. He was coming at 5. I guess it was too late to postpone, right?

However, there was one thing that still didn't sit right with me. As I practiced with my fingers, I kept watching myself in the bathroom mirror. Last night, as I imagined myself in the blonde's place, her femininity was what won me over. Picturing myself as a pretty girl with a dick in my mouth was exciting. But looking at myself in the mirror, I saw a guy pushing an imaginary cock down his throat. I was afraid that once I was face to face with the thing, the whole situation was gonna strike me as too gay and I won't be able to go through with it. It was time for another trip.

***

4:50 PM, I was ready for David to ring the bell. I sat on my bed, awaiting his arrival. I sprayed three puffs of numbing agent in the back of my throat. 4:55 PM, I was not ready to this. I was just gonna have to phone him and call it off, come what may. 4:59 PM, he's not gonna come, this was just a prank and I was an idiot to believe it. 5:01 PM, where the hell is he, why isn't he here already? 5:03 PM, the bell rang and I jumped out of my bed and out of my skin.

I unlocked the door and cracked it open, peaking from behind it, unsure if I was teasing him or myself. When I finally opened the door wide and he saw me, he froze for a second in the doorway.

"You managed to surprise me. You look very pretty," he said, admiring my blonde locks and my red lips.

I wanted to look like that little cumslut that I watched last night so I went out and got a blonde wig and a red lipstick. It's not gay if I pretend I'm a girl, right? At least it's less gay, right?

He closed the door behind him and led me into the middle of the room.

"Do you want something to drink?"

He ignored my question and stroked my face with his hand. He brushed his thumb over my mouth. I opened my lips and took it in. I swirled my tongue around it a couple of times and then I started sucking gently on it. Turns out, not only was another guy's thumb in my mouth not disgusting, it was actually arousing.

"You got a pretty little mouth. And hungry, too, don't you?"

He removed his finger from my mouth, leaving my lips craving for its return. He put his hands on my shoulder and pushed me down gently.

"Let's not waste time."

"I thought I would sit on the bed," I protested softly.

"Get on your knees."

I followed his instruction dutifully. Now face to face with his crotch, I brought my hand up and started feeling for his cock through his jeans. "He's already super hard," I thought. "I won't have to do this for long. Wait, I'm getting hard, too."

"Undo my belt and pull down my pants."

And like a good little girl, I did what he asked. I could see clearly the shape of his cock in his underwear. I had a good idea what size I was about to wrestle this. "I can do this," I thought. Not words I would've thought yesterday.

"And my my briefs."

Again, I complied. His cock sprung from his underwear and stood ready for action. He was expecting me to put it in my mouth. That's what I'd agreed to. I stood there half revolted and half aroused. I can't believe he's so horny that he's paying another guy to suck his dick.

"Are you nervous?"

I nodded.

He grabbed my mouth and said, "I'm gonna fill you with cum, sissy and you're gonna love it." His filthy talk took me by surprise, but not in the sense that I felt like I should run away. Rather in the sense that my mouth watered.

Before I knew it, my lips were wrapped around his juicy cock and I was sucking it. No tentative kisses, no timorous licking to get acquainted to it. Straight to sucking. I worked the first couple of inches with my mouth, getting it nice and wet. I teased his pee hole with the tip of my tongue, putting into practice what I had learned just this morning on my own cock.

A couple of drops of precum oozed onto my tongue. It tasted salty, like mine, but not quite like mine. It had an extra tang to it.

A couple of drops of precum oozed also in my boxers. Sucking his dick was making my mind all dizzy.

"Don't worry, I won't tell anyone how much you enjoy sucking my cock," were his words of encouragement.

"Mmm," was my reply. I don't know if I was trying to protest or to acknowledge what he said. I never imagined making another man hard would make me so horny.

"I can tell you're enjoying this. Bet you never thought it would turn you on this much, right, you little slut?"

"Mmm."

I started bobbing my head further and further down his shaft. Somehow, he was still getting harder. I loved the sensation of power that it gave me. Knowing that his dick was hard because of me, that his moans were caused by my mouth. But soon he grabbed my head and started to push his cock into my mouth and that sensation of power turned into submissiveness in an instant.

"Have you done this before? You suck dick like a pro," he offered as praise as he started to hit the back of my throat. "You must love the taste cause you're devouring my cock," he said as he pushed it further down.

"Gluck! Gluck! Gluck!" was the only response I could offer him. The numbing spray was working miracles so far. I tried to focus my mind on the breathing. I tried to squeeze my thumb. My mouth was filled with saliva, his dick sloshing past my red painted lips. My eyes started to water as well. Finally, he let go of my head and I could come up for air. As I released his cock from my mouth, all that spit flowed out of my mouth, down my chin, into my lap.

I grabbed his dick and started to jerk it while I was catching my breath. Soon, it was back in my mouth, sliding down my tongue. I increased the pace, getting more eager with each bob of my head. I felt so eerie, I just didn't want to take my lips off his manhood. He told me to go deeper so I tried my best. Soon I was gluck-gluck-glucking again. He called me a good girl while I continued to suck his cock. I felt like such a slut and I loved it.

All I could think about was sucking his cock. He grabbed my hair and called me his slut. I felt so naughty.

"Fuck, you are such a good cocksucker," he complimented me. I loved being his good little cocksucker. He shoved my head all the way down his cock and I tried with all my willpower not to gag too much.

"You better not bitch when I cum," he warned me. "I want to watch you gulp down my cum."

I started to crave his cum and my mouth flooded with saliva again. It's not gay if I don't enjoy it, right? I wished he'd hurry up though. He was lasting longer than I do. He's got stamina, I'll admit it.

"Get ready you little cumslut," he grunted.

I could feel he was getting close so I started working harder for my reward. When the first jet of cum coated my tongue I let out a deep moan of pleasure. What's wrong with being a little gay? I couldn't help licking his pulsing head, savouring the delicious jizz coating my tongue.

My mouth filled up with his warm sticky cum. I made sure I licked his tip clean.

"Show me that cum like a good little slut." I opened my mouth careful not to let anything slip.

"Does it taste good?" I nodded.

"Fuck, you look so good with a mouth full of cum. Let me take a picture of you." I held it in my mouth until he got his phone out and the flash lit my face. I gargled with it and he took another picture. That's what good little cocksuckers do, right?

I swallowed his cum like the true cumslut I had become.

"You did good, sissy." He gave me an affectionate slap on the cheek.

"Thank you."

"Not a bad way to make a hundred bucks, am I right?"

I nodded in agreement. It turned out it wasn't a bad way to make a hundred dollars. Well, fifty, minus the expenses. You know, the wig, the lipstick, the spray. But I thought of them as an investment for the future.

"Same time next week?"