Chasing Jamie

"What the hell was I even here to get?" I thought to myself, vigorously searching my memory.

Dave's Stop and Rob was what we used to call it. This gas station convenience store had practically anything you'd need, but you'd think it was getting held up all the time based on the rumors. I could only remember a couple of times it had actually made the papers.

I stepped back and took a breath, scanning the shelves one more time for something to jog my memory. Then, I heard the bell ring as the door opened.

There she was: Jamie MacIntyre, walking into the shop as if it were planned. She looked like she'd never had a bad hair day in her life. But that was just who she was.

Brilliant, charismatic, and beautiful, she had it all going on in a kind of weird way. She had been captain--or whatever the lead is--of both the chess team and the debate club, and somehow managed to be a starter on the soccer and volleyball teams. Jamie was everywhere all the time, and everyone knew her.

Even Dave, the owner of the store, knew her. She didn't come here to shop; everything she needed was already packed for her behind the counter. She merrily approached the counter and greeted Dave, who reciprocated by handing her two large plastic bags full of supplies.

"Thanks, Dave!" she said with genuine gratitude. "What do I owe you?"

"Don't worry about it today, Jamie," Dave replied. "I'll put it on your parents' tab."

This was the moment; I had to make a move. I paid no more attention to what I had been searching for. I simply grabbed something off the shelf and rushed to the counter, arriving just as she was about to pick up the bags.

"Hi, James!" she said, almost reflexively, when she saw me.

The familiarity felt natural but unnerving. It had been a year since I'd last heard her say my name, and prior to that, well... She had no business knowing me, and yet she did. It was as if she cared about everyone.

"Jamie," I acknowledged, trying to play it cool. "What brings you in?"

She smiled and swept a lock of hair behind her ear. "There's a party tonight at my house... what do you have there? Cat food?"

"Uh... yeah... you know... for cats." I smiled awkwardly, pushing the can behind me.

"Cats, huh?" she inquired casually. "Didn't figure you for a cat guy."

I wasn't. We didn't have cats. "Uh, yeah... I dunno... my mom asked for it."

Our eyes locked, and we held each other's gaze for a moment. Her smile was perfect; I wished it would never end.

"So, what are your plans for tonight?" she asked.

It was Halloween. I had plans, but I wasn't about to mention them. "I don't really have any... too old to trick-or-treat, you know," I said, as if it were a stupid joke. "Maybe just stay home and watch a horror movie or something."

She chuckled. "That's lame," she said in a lighthearted tone.

I laughed. "Yeah, it is."

"Well, if you're up for it... you should come by my place. It'll be fun. My parents are out of town," she said with a wink.

"Big party?" I asked.

She shook her head. "Small... medium... maybe. Just some friends. We're meeting up after the trick-or-treaters are all done. You don't need to dress up or anything. And don't bring anything--I have what we need right here!"

She picked up the stuffed bags, which appeared quite heavy. I could see cans pushing against the doubled-up plastic.

She glanced at me. "You know where I live?"

I had no reason to know, but I did. "Yeah, I think so," I replied, as if it made perfect sense.

She pried the door open with her foot, ringing the bell again. "So, will I see you there?"

I smiled. "Yeah, probably." Definitely was what I wanted to say.

She smiled in acknowledgment and made her way to her blue Bronco.

"So, you want that cat food or what?" Dave asked me

----------

Her house looked exactly as I remembered it, and the sight immediately took me back. It had stunning curb appeal. The exterior was a combination of dark grey siding and stacked stone. Natural wood columns and architectural accents adorned the facade, creating a charming, rustic aesthetic. The landscaping consisted of various conifers--which I couldn't identify--all cleanly shaped with generous, well-groomed mulch beds flowing around each one. It was picture-perfect.

I took a minute to absorb the image; I wanted to remember it. Then, I made my way to the front door.

The muffled sound of music resonated through the stained-glass door, and I could vaguely make out movement on the other side. Suddenly, the door opened and Jamie greeted me. It was like a dream.

"Hi, James! I didn't think you'd come." Her tone suggested the complete opposite--as if she knew I'd be there. I hadn't even had a chance to ring the bell.

"Yeah... I wasn't sure myself," I lied.

She smiled and glanced at me as if she knew. "Well, come on in then. I'll introduce you to some of my friends."

----------

Jamie led me back through her house. The whole time, I ogled her from behind. She was wearing a light pink halter top, heather grey sweatpants, and white sneakers; she still looked elegant despite the practical pajama motif. The outfit perfectly accentuated her frame, highlighting certain assets and teasing my imagination with the rest. The movement of her hips was absolutely captivating, and it required a conscious effort to stop staring--so much so that I deliberately had to avert my gaze before we entered the next room.

In the kitchen were familiar faces that I didn't actually know: Jamie's friends from school and elsewhere

"Hi, everyone!" Jamie called out, waiting for the room's attention. "This is James."

Then she turned to me. "James..." She waved her hand. "This is everyone."

She placed her hand on my shoulder and leaned in. "Make yourself at home, okay? I'm going to get something to drink. Want me to bring you something?"

This was new and felt a bit awkward. "Uh... sure... that'd be great."

Her eyes narrowed and she bit her lip while she studied me. "Stay here. I'll be back."

----------

My head was a mess. I had come into the night with focus, an open mind, and curiosity; it was like a puzzle I needed to solve. A big part of me wanted to see if I could change things. However, whether consciously or not, a bigger part of me just wanted Jamie.

Time felt as if it were standing still. The room seemed to be in slow motion, and it felt like I knew every conversation despite not being able to hear the details.

My attention followed Jamie as she walked across the room. Just before she stepped through the doorway on the other side, she glanced back and smiled at me. Then, a familiar presence interrupted my thoughts.

"Hi, my name is Samantha."

I remembered her from before, but I introduced myself anyway. "I'm James."

Her piercing blue eyes and cute smile were truly unforgettable. "I know... Jamie just told everyone," she said facetiously.

"Right..." I thought. I'm an idiot.

----------

Samantha was a fox, and I was but a mouse in the field. Her conversational mastery and flirtatious technique toyed with me while I waited for Jamie's return. I couldn't tell if she was just playing with me or if she wanted to eat me alive--and there was nothing wrong with that.

My one and only goal for the evening was all things Jamie. Despite anything else, that remained clear. Although Samantha was adorable and articulate, I put my best effort into being politely unavailable. Ironically, that seemed to make the game that much more fun for her.

There was a magic to Samantha, though. I could have stood there silently and she still would have managed to keep the conversation fluid, natural, and engaging. It was an exceptional talent in and of itself, and I found myself intuitively attracted to it. She was captivating, simple as that. Beautiful, exceptionally smart, and perhaps a little too cunning, she drew me in like a siren. Like a thick fog settling on the water, I'd nearly lost sight of Jamie.

But then, just as I was almost completely lost, Jamie reappeared and tapped me on the shoulder. I turned, and she handed me a bottle. I already knew it was a Bud Light without looking. I didn't hate it, but it was the last beer on Earth I'd choose to drink. Somehow, details like that endure.

"Hey... I'll be back..." she said again. "You two look cute together." Jamie flashed a smile, winked, and continued on without further pause.

Despite the sincerity of her words, she projected a teasing encouragement; I could tell she was playing with me. She didn't want me with Samantha, but Samantha wasn't enough of a threat to warrant competition. At least, that's how I read it. Jamie's particular style radiated an alluring confidence that begged for a chase.

In that moment, the fog immediately lifted, and my gaze unabashedly followed her as she walked out to the patio. But just as Jamie rounded the corner, I felt Samantha's gentle, yet firm, touch guide my chin back to her.

"See, James, she'll be back," Samantha said with a coy and familiar smile.

The fog started to close in again. It felt like I was chasing the white rabbit.

----------

"Hey! We're going to get in the hot tub," a couple called to Samantha and me.

That wasn't supposed to happen until later, and I didn't even want to do it. It was too early for the hot tub. But Samantha grabbed my arm, giggled, and pulled me along.

"I don't have a suit," I objected.

She giggled again. "Neither do I."

"Come on!" the other couple called out, laughing as they exited to the patio.

Samantha pulled harder. "It'll be fun!"

Maybe Jamie was out there already.

----------

The couple who'd raced out ahead of us were already sinking into the hot tub by the time we caught up. I caught a glimpse of their nude backsides as they dipped below the surface.

"I'm not doing that," I proclaimed in a whisper.

Samantha smiled at me. "You sure? Because I am."

She didn't waste any time, pulling her shirt over her head and dropping her pants. Next came her undergarments. Without a trace of modesty, she collected her things and placed them neatly on the adjacent bench before slowly climbing into the hot tub. I couldn't help but stare.

"Come on, James!" the three of them called out to me at practically the same time.

"Hey, James," I heard Jamie's familiar voice. "Go ahead and enjoy yourself. I'm going in to talk to a few friends, and then I'll come out here and join you guys."

"In the hot tub?" I asked.

She chuckled as if it were obvious. "Yeah..."

"I don't have a suit or anything..." I offered my best non-confrontational reluctance.

She looked at me like I was stupid. "No one does. It's fine. Just go with it, and I'll catch up with you later."

I watched Jamie go back into the house and then shifted my gaze back to my peers in the hot tub. Samantha caught my eye and patted the surface of the water. "Come on, James... don't be shy."

I glanced back at the house and then back at the hot tub. Fuck it, I thought.

The idea of stripping down and getting in there was a stark departure from my norm. If I'm being perfectly honest, I had insecurities about what I thought were my modest proportions. I just assumed there would be giggling and judgment once I dropped my pants. But tonight was different. It wasn't going to matter what they thought, for better or worse.

"Are you guys just going to watch me strip?" I asked.

The three pairs of staring eyes finally broke and visually acknowledged each other. In that moment, they all realized they were doing the same thing. Then Samantha broke the silence.

"Yeah!" she said. "It's Halloween! Just embrace it! Let go!"

I shook my head and pulled my shirt off. Then, I glanced at the three of them one more time, huffed a breath, closed my eyes, and dropped my drawers. Cheers erupted, followed by clapping. I opened my eyes to genuine support and enthusiasm for taking the leap. I smiled, climbed up, and sank into the hot tub.

Samantha wasted no time cozying up to me. As soon as our bodies made firm contact, I felt her hand cup me with a firm squeeze. I'd be lying if I said it didn't feel good.

----------

The night was still calm, but the air was beginning to cool. Warm mist floated above the surface of the water, diffusing the soft glow of the multicolored hot tub lights. Light blues, pinks, and greens reflected not just off of us, but the immediate environment. The hot tub had its own aura; everything beyond the edge and the pool seemed pitch black, except for the house. Its windows glowed with a soft orange-yellow, allowing a clear view of everything happening inside.

The other couple in the hot tub were no longer talking to us; rather, they were fully engaged with each other. Their lips were locked, and the movement of their shoulders signaled that their hands were actively probing beneath the surface of the water. They were in their own world.

Apparently, I was as well. Rather than making out with Samantha, I was focused on everything around me: the ambient lighting, the couple, and the activity in the house--or the curious lack thereof. Samantha didn't seem to mind. She had quietly nestled her head into the crook of my neck and wrapped the rest of herself around me like an octopus. The only movement she made was the soft, slow manipulation of my arousal, which I found more calming than stimulating.

Between her ministrations, the hot tub, and the surrounding serenity, I felt especially relaxed; my mind found peace. I rested my head on hers, closed my eyes, and simply enjoyed the moment for however long it would last.

----------

A soft whisper woke me. "Hey... are you sleeping?"

It certainly felt like it, though I didn't think I had been. My heavy eyes slowly opened and my head shifted slightly. Samantha was still in the same position, doing the same thing. And to my left was Jamie.

She glanced into the water. "I didn't mean to disturb you guys."

I felt Samantha's head shift to acknowledge her. "You didn't," she spoke softly. "You should join us."

Jamie smiled and arched an eyebrow. "You don't think three's a crowd?"

Samantha lifted her head and chuckled. "When have I ever thought that?"

I wasn't sure if I had actually fallen asleep, but it seemed later all of a sudden. The haze floating over the calm surface of the water appeared thicker, and I noticed the other two occupants were gone. Clearly, I had succumbed to Samantha's spell. The ripples of water emanating from my chest did little to hide what was happening below, and Jamie's vantage point afforded her an unobstructed view. The evidence was on full display. Strangely, she didn't seem to care as she paused to consider the invitation.

"Okay," she said in a matter-of-fact tone.

Stripping naked around here must have been totally normal, because Jamie didn't think twice about disrobing. Like Samantha, she effortlessly slipped out of her clothing and placed it neatly on the bench. Then she started to climb into the hot tub, but paused. Turbulence parted the fog and angelically framed her intimate areas. From where I was sitting, it was all I could look at.

Then our eyes locked. For a moment, I feared my staring had offended her.

"Hey..." she said. "I just realized we're going to need some towels. Be right back."

She stepped back down from the edge of the hot tub and sauntered back to the house without bothering to put anything on. I watched her nude form enter the building, wondering at the boldness. The illumination in the home was such that it exposed the contents of each window, almost as if it were designed to showcase them. I could literally watch Jamie move from room to room, bare and unprotected from view.

I was transfixed, locked onto the subtle undulations of her form. From window to window, it was like my own personal peep show. She'd chosen this, I reasoned, so I shouldn't feel guilty about looking--but I still did. And I enjoyed every second of the display.

"She looks good, doesn't she?" I heard Samantha say.

"Yeah, she does," I affirmed, without considering whether the comment was a trap.

"We do this all the time, you know?" she said.

I didn't know what she meant. Was she talking about luring unsuspecting men into their clutches?

"What's that?" I asked as innocently as I could.

"This..." she said, reaching out in a graceful arc. "Look around."

I took in the scenery of the backyard. It was dark, but the soft light from the home provided enough illumination to see the immediate hardscape. There was a cozy, well-appointed patio off the back of the house. From there, a large stamped concrete pad bordered a medium-sized swimming pool, which radiated and refracted the glow from the deep end. Around all of that was dark, lush landscaping that encased this private oasis. I couldn't see a single distant light through the vegetation. It was totally secluded.

If she was alluding to the fact that the area was private, I understood. But I sensed there was more to it, so I shrugged to signal that I needed further explanation.

She cocked her head, appearing slightly annoyed. She rolled her eyes, huffed, and rose up out of the water. Her eyes widened and she daintily gestured over the areas that would normally be covered by a swimsuit.

"This!" she smiled. "We never wear swimsuits here."

I smiled and nodded as she slipped back into the water. Apparently, they never missed an opportunity to show it off, either.

Just then, the back door opened again and Jamie called out as she crossed the threshold, "I've got the towels!"

She captured all my attention as she traversed the patio. The stack of towels she was carrying obstructed the view of her chest but left everything from the waist down exposed. However, because of the backlighting, the details of her anatomy remained undefined. She had a broad smile on her face as she approached the hot tub.

She placed the towels on the bench and climbed into the tub, once again giving me a close view of everything I could hope to see. Then she sank down next to me, effectively sandwiching me between the two of them.

"Is there room for me, too?" she whispered in my ear, just as I felt a second hand begin to caress me.

----------

From the moment Jamie had slipped into the water, the air started to change. It was slow at first but escalated quickly. I had about five minutes of bliss before the wind picked up, clearing the mist and rustling the leaves. Eventually, it became significant enough for Samantha to suggest going inside.

"Come on..." Jamie pleaded. "I just got in."

The sky brightened with the artifacts of distant lightning. It was still too far away for thunder, but it was clear that a storm was coming and we needed to be inside before it arrived. Like Jamie, I wanted to stay put for a little longer, but I knew better and agreed with Samantha. Given the state I was in, it took considerable mental strength to do so.

Samantha got out of the hot tub first and began toweling off. Jamie glanced at me, shrugged, and followed suit, stepping up and over the other side. Up until now, the water had afforded me a sense of false cover, and I realized what I was about to display as I prepared to climb out. Both girls were already well on their way to toweling off as I contemplated the best approach to exiting.

"Come on, James," Jamie said.

"Ummm... just give me a minute," I huffed.

The girls looked at each other, and I saw a thought click between them. Then they both looked back at me in unison.

"It's cool... we already know... don't worry about it," said Samantha.

Obviously, I thought, pursing my lips and rolling my eyes.

It felt like I was getting undressed for the first time all over again, only worse. I wanted to cover myself, but I knew that would be more ridiculous than simply owning it. So, as gracefully as I could, I elevated myself from the tub and stepped out. Both girls watched intently, as if nothing else existed. Their eyes were locked on one thing, and their expressions made me feel suddenly insecure.

"Stare much, guys?" I asked flippantly.

Their stares broke and they simultaneously looked at each other. There was a brief pause as they read each other's expressions, then, in perfect synchronicity, they each lifted a hand to cover their respective giggles. They were clearly laughing at their own gawking, but I couldn't help but feel they were laughing at me.

"I know... I know... it's really funny," I mused.

Their giggles turned into laughter and they stumbled into each other. Jamie's arm wrapped around Samantha as they straightened themselves to offer consolation.

"I'm sorry, James," Jamie said. "We're not laughing at you. Really."

"Sure..." I said, wrapping myself in a towel.

"We're just being girls... that's all," she said. "It's just funny how it just sticks straight out like that."

Samantha slapped Jamie's shoulder with the back of her hand. "JAMIE!"

"What? It just does!" she countered. "I'm not going to lie about it."

"Can't you see he's embarrassed?" Samantha sarcastically scolded her.

I wasn't really. I mean, maybe superficially I was, but it wasn't eliciting a true physiological response. Truly, I was fine with it. Perhaps a combination of what I said and my skin being flushed from the heat of the tub signaled more than what was actually happening.

"I'm sorry, James!" Jamie said with the utmost sincerity.

"It's fine," I said, finishing the tuck of my towel.

"Can we see it one more time?" she asked in a disarmingly frank tone.

Samantha's eyes shot wide and she supplied another gentle backhand. "JAMIE?"

"What? I want to... he can say 'no,'" Jamie countered.

I rolled my eyes and thought, What the hell.

My hands grabbed the towel and pulled it open, letting them see everything again. I held it there in the dim patio lighting, allowing them as much time as they wanted to soak in the view. Despite my own apprehension, I felt proud that I could spring to full attention. It felt satisfying knowing there wasn't a trace of weakness, and I enjoyed watching them watch me.

Their expressions began with acute focus and held for a brief moment. Then, as they stared a little longer, the stoicism cracked and smiles emerged. When the laughter started again, I rolled my eyes and closed my towel.

I couldn't be offended by the immaturity; the laughter was frankly contagious. Had it been a couple of guys laughing at me, I would have felt humiliated. But before these two women, it felt different. The laughter wasn't one of ridicule, but of innocence and discovery. Together, the moment blossomed comfortably. I realized I was okay with it.

As we started to come down from our laughter, the wind shifted and picked up. We all held still, listening to the wind start to howl.

"I think I'm going to head home," said Samantha.

"Awww... really?" Jamie pouted. "Just stay a little longer..."

Samantha glanced up at the sky. "The storm is coming, and I don't want to get caught in the rain."

"You can stay over tonight!" Jamie offered.

"No, it's okay. I have church in the morning and stuff..." Samantha rolled her eyes at the thought of her responsibilities.

Jamie looked at me and offered, "Well, do you at least want us to walk you home?"

"Don't be silly... I just have to get to the end of the street. And you'd have to get all dressed and everything," Samantha said as she started to put her clothes back on. "I'll be okay, you just stay."

"We're taking you home," Jamie said firmly. "Come on, James, let's get dressed."

----------

Walking Samantha home wasn't the worst thing; I already knew I was going to get some private time with Jamie. In the process, I'd also get to further my bond with Samantha. That isn't to suggest it was strategic in any way--it was just convenient. But I didn't realize how uncomfortable and interesting our conversation would be right from the outset.

"So, James... tell us about what you've got going on down there," Jamie said as we reached the end of her driveway. It was the kind of statement that implied a question.

"Oh my gosh! THANK YOU!" Samantha blurted. "So many questions..."

"Sam!" Jamie swatted her arm.

"What!?!?" she said defensively, then added in a conspiratorial whisper, "He's a hairless wonder."

Jamie's eyes shot daggers. "That is not what we're talking about."

It was immediately unnerving; Samantha's comment spiked anxiety and apprehension within me. The stiff silence that followed was equally uncomfortable. I feared that letting it draw out would only highlight my natural insecurities, so I felt the need to steer the conversation. I leaned into Jamie's question.

I chuckled awkwardly. "Um... what do you want to know?"

They glanced at each other, clearly sharing a thought about what to say next.

Samantha spoke first. "Are you still hard?"

Again, Jamie scolded her. "SAM!"

"WHAT?!?! I can't ask these questions? You saw how he had to tuck it into his pants," Samantha argued. "If you're not going to ask about it, I am."

I watched Jamie roll her eyes and shake her head. More was certainly coming, and I looked away to escape.

"Okay, okay, okay... I have another question for you," Samantha continued. "How often do you walk the dog?"

I didn't get it right away. "I don't... I don't have a dog."

"You know what I mean," she said, nodding as she glanced pointedly at my groin.

"Got it..." I said, nodding my head.

"Well?" she pressed.

"Samantha!" Jamie finally caught up. "That's not what that means!"

"It absolutely means that!" Samantha reaffirmed.

Jamie turned to me. "You don't have to answer any of this... I was just wondering... you know... if..." Her voice trailed off.

We'd been walking for a little while by this point, and the nature of the conversation forced me to avoid eye contact. In doing so, I took in our surroundings. The street seemed darker than I would have expected. The lights were spooky--not flickering or overtly "Halloween," but soft and dim, as if they were dying out. Although it was late, traffic was practically nonexistent. The only cars I could see were the tiny head and tail lights far off in the distance at the flashing intersection several stop signs away.

While haphazardly answering their questions, I noticed the wind had become still. I realized it had been still since we'd left Jamie's backyard. Aside from the darkness, it was unnervingly quiet. Then I noticed the sky was clear, as if the storm had existed only at Jamie's house.

The girls didn't seem to notice, and I was reluctant to bring it up. They seemed perfectly content remaining siloed in our walk together, and frankly, so was I. The subject matter of their questions was captivating, distracting, and oddly satisfying. Everything revolved around my anatomy, as if it were a standardized data point that uniformly reflected the experience of all men.

"Okay... fine... softball question," Samantha asked coyly. "How many times a day does it happen?"

I mused, "Are we still talking about walking my dog?"

Samantha huffed. "No, just how often your leash pulls straight."

I chuckled. "More than I'd like to admit."

"What... like every day?" Jamie pressed.

"Pfff..." I practically mocked. "Every morning, every afternoon... multiple times a day."

The question of quantity actually made me pause to think, effectively distracting me from everything else. "It's actually a lot," I replied honestly.

"What about now?" Jamie asked.

"I wish I could say 'yes,' but no," I said, looking around the gloom.

"This is me," Samantha said abruptly as we approached a particularly dark house.

"This?" I said, trying to hide my shock.

The home was so dark it was eerie. Even if everyone was in bed, I would have expected a porch light or some illumination from inside. You just don't see homes with zero light. I couldn't understand how it could be this dark; it was as if the house were cloaked. Yet, Samantha saw no issue with it.

"Thanks for hanging out tonight!" Jamie said, throwing her arms around Samantha.

The two embraced firmly, and I could faintly hear them whispering to each other.

Samantha released her and smiled at me. "Thanks for walking me home!"

Then she turned with a spring in her step and jogged toward the house. She seemed to disappear into the darkness; I'm not even sure I saw the front door open.

"Hey, let's get going," Jamie said firmly.

She grabbed my arm and started pulling me back the way we came before I had a moment to question it.

"Did Samantha get in there okay?" I asked, tripping slightly as I tried to keep up.

Jamie's fingers were intertwined with mine now as we briskly paced the sidewalk.

"Oh yeah... for sure," she said confidently.

"Jamie..." I pulled her to a stop. "It was so dark, though. Didn't you see it?"

"It's fine..." she said. "Look..."

I followed her extended arm and the tip of her finger until I saw Samantha's house. The perimeter was now brightly illuminated and a few of the windows were glowing. Even the roofline was reflecting moonlight that had previously been nonexistent. It was the damndest thing.

"Can we get going now? It's getting chilly out here." She smiled and shimmied her tail a little, clearly eager to get back.

"Yeah... sure..." I said, looking back one more time to make sure I wasn't imagining it.

"Hey, does it hurt when you have to tuck it?" she asked, though it sounded more like a statement.

"What?" I asked, genuinely confused.

"Your penis... you know... when it's hard... does it hurt when you have to tuck it?" Her question felt oddly clinical and rushed.

Her pace quickened, and I lengthened my stride to keep up. After a few more steps, I put the brakes on again and pulled her to a stop.

"Hey... Jamie..." I said. "Do you think we can slow it down a bit?"

She looked around anxiously. "We just need to get back soon, okay?" Then she steadied, bit her lower lip, and looked at me with a curious smile. "And I have some more questions for you."

"Yeah, me too..." I muttered under my breath as she proceeded to drag me down the street.

----------

When we got back, her house already looked different than when we'd left. No wind, no lightning, no storm. However, the yard was somewhat disheveled; there was debris on the ground and the trees weren't as well-shaped as before. One of the porch lights had gone out. As we entered the house, some paint flaked off the door jam.

"Hey..." Jamie said brightly, "let's go get a drink..."

While she skipped down the hall toward the kitchen, I trailed more slowly. The atmosphere felt different and the house felt quieter. Music wasn't playing anymore and some of the rooms were darker.

"Where did everybody go?" I asked as I stepped into the kitchen.

"What do you mean?" Jamie replied.

I shrugged. "The party, the people, the music..."

She looked around, a little confused. "Oh... I guess they must have left."

Just then, the patio door opened. "Hey! You guys want to come join us by the pool?"

Jamie smiled. "They're outside."

Paranoia was setting in, and I just needed to find a way to--

"Relax," Jamie said, as if she had read my mind. "Come with me..."

She took my hand and led me to another part of the house, which looked like an office. Jamie crossed the room and opened a cabinet on the wall. She turned back to me, dangling an amber bottle in her hand.

"Kentucky bourbon," she said with a sneaky smile.

"You drink bourbon?" I asked.

"No," she said with a pout.

"So... what are we doing, then?"

"Drinking some bourbon," she said, as if it were obvious.

Jamie put the bottle on the desk and turned back to the cabinet. She spun back around with a pair of short whiskey glasses and set them next to the bottle. She popped the cork and poured a finger or two in each glass, then handed one to me.

"We don't have to drink, you know..." I said. "Especially if you don't even like this stuff..."

"I know..." Jamie said, swirling the amber liquid. "But you seem like you need something to loosen you up. You seem tense."

"I guess I am... a bit," I admitted.

"I don't know why, but I am, too." She smiled and clinked my glass. "Bottoms up."

We smiled at each other and shot the contents. The burn was real, and we both started coughing.

"Uhhh..." she groaned. "That's supposed to be my dad's good stuff."

I kept coughing. "You don't think he'll notice?"

"No one will ever notice," she said cryptically.

----------

"Let me ask you something..." I said. "Why'd you invite me here tonight?"

She seemed to search for the answer at the bottom of her empty glass. Then she picked up the bottle and poured a little more, as if the liquid would somehow provide the answer.

"Want another splash?" she asked kindly.

"Jamie..." I tried to redirect her.

"I don't know... okay?" she said, pressing her temple.

She took a sip and started to pace the room. This time, there was no coughing. I leaned back against the desk and watched.

"James, I don't know," she said again. "It's a feeling."

She stopped and looked at me. I could see her chest rise and fall with each deliberate breath. There was a hint of desperation in her eyes, as if she wanted to hear the answer from me. Her mind couldn't remember, but her heart could.

"It's like you've been here before..." I softly stated, glancing across the room.

"How do you know that?" She stilled.

I stepped over to the window and peeked outside. The sky was still clear. People were still in the pool. Things still looked good.

"I don't know what to do now," I said to her.

I felt her hand on my shoulder as she whispered, "Just go with it."

When I turned, she pressed into me and pushed her lips to mine. I loved the way the whiskey tasted on her--warm and sweet, with notes of caramel and vanilla on her breath. I savored the moment, trying to remember every detail. Bourbon with a cherry chapstick finish; indelible.

When our kiss broke, she pulled back with closed eyes and a satisfied grin. With her hands around my waist, she let her weight fall back a bit.

"It's kind of weird," she said with a soft huff of laughter. "It feels too perfect."

"Yeah," I agreed.

"Do you ever think... like... maybe you knew someone in another life?" she asked.

"Yeah..." I said. "I believe that's a thing."

She playfully slapped my shoulder and laughed. "You're mocking me!"

I laughed with her. "I wish I were... but it's true."

"Yeah?" she said softly, pulling close again to look into my eyes. "What am I thinking then?"

"Honestly?"

"Yeah... honestly... tell me what I'm thinking."

"You're thinking about why I was buying cat food when you know I don't have cats. And you don't know how you know that I don't have cats," I said frankly.

Her smile dropped and her eyes widened. "Fuck you, James! How did you know that!?!?"

We locked eyes and the tension suddenly became palpable. She stepped back and looked at me with an intensity I'd never seen before. Stuck with no idea of what to do next, I tried to play it off as a joke. I started laughing.

"What?... you weren't really thinking that... were you?" I asked, acting as if she were playing a trick on me.

"Yeah... fuck you..." She playfully slapped my arm as the seriousness softened. "That's exactly what I was thinking. How did you know that?"

"It was a dumb guess... I dunno... I was just thinking about running into you earlier," I offered, pretending it were the truth.

"Uh huh... and I'm supposed to believe that?" She pushed into me again.

"How do I know you're not the one messing with me?" I asked, knowing the truth.

She bit her lower lip. "I dunno... guess you'll just have to trust me," she said, pressing her lips to mine again.

"Hey..." she said softly as she broke the kiss. "Want to come to my bedroom?"

I wasn't going to say no.

----------

We barely got through the door of her room before she was pushing me toward the bed. I backed into it, practically tripping over myself, and fell squarely on my back. Quickly and athletically, she hopped up and straddled my hips, then leaned over and planted her lips on mine. She held me pinned for several minutes, exploring my mouth with her tongue.

Sitting back to look down at me, she asked, "Are you okay with doing this?"

I smiled at the irony of the question. It felt so backwards, as if she were the one taking advantage of me.

"What's funny?" she asked.

"Nothing... just... I feel like I should be asking you that."

"Oh... yeah? Why? 'Cause you're the guy and I'm the girl? I can't possibly be the manipulative one, can I? Did you ever think maybe I'm the one taking advantage of you?" she teased.

"It's not like I'd put up much of a fight."

"Yeah?..." she challenged. "What if I take your pants off?"

I laughed. "I'm not going to stop you."

"You sure? You seemed timid before..." she asked one more time as she began to undo my pants.

I smiled as she loosened them and shifted them over my hips. Her nails grazed my skin as her fingers hooked into the waistband of my boxers, working them down too. Just as I popped free, she covered her mouth to hide a laugh.

"I'm sorry," she whispered through a soft giggle. "You're just so smooth. It's kind of... surprising."

Normally I would have shied away from the exposure, but not tonight. I was already ready for her. I needed her. Whatever judgment she might have, I was okay with it. Justification wasn't a priority.

"I mean... I like it... don't be offended, okay?" She paused before continuing. "It just feels kind of like I'm handling a little sculpture."

Her hand flew to her mouth and she reeled back. I already knew what she was thinking and feeling, and I wasn't bothered by it. She didn't mean it like it sounded; she was just thinking out loud.

"It's okay..." I reassured her.

"No... n..." she stuttered. "I didn't mean to suggest..."

"It's fine... it's okay... just kiss me," I instructed.

Jamie's hand lowered, revealing the smile I could never forget. Her eyes were happy; her body relaxed. She crossed her arms, grabbed the hem of her top, and pulled it over her head in one pass. I only got to appreciate her form for a moment before she crashed down on top of me, suffocating me with affection.

She rode me like that, dry humping me through her sweatpants--grinding, teasing, and kissing my face. I felt like I was in heaven.

"Take your pants off," she said all of a sudden.

Jamie hopped off me and stood at the foot of the bed. She hooked her thumbs in her waistband and peeled her sweats over her hips, letting them drop to the floor.

"Take off your pants," she said again.

Mine were already halfway down my thighs, so I sat up and pushed them to my feet. She grabbed the bunched-up mess of garments and tossed them aside.

With the same athleticism, she hopped back on the bed and straddled me again. Her thighs flanked my sides as she positioned herself directly above me. She reached down, aimed, and impaled herself upon me. Just like that, I was inside her.

I'd waited for this moment for so long. I'd missed her for so long. And even though the connection felt new, it was one we'd experienced a thousand times before. This was my Jamie, my girl, my love. She was my one and only, and we were connecting the way we always used to.

She pressed hard into me and rode rhythmically. We moved together perfectly--slow, fast, deep, shallow. We knew each other with the utmost conviction. When she moved, I followed. When I moved, she followed. Together, we merged into one, and the rest of reality faded away.

At the pinnacle, when we reached our respective climaxes, we crashed into each other with passionate ferocity. Loud and coarse, yet still delicate, we found each other simultaneously and then collapsed into bliss. Chest to chest, we lay motionless. The fog surrounded me once more.

----------

"FUCK!" my thoughts screamed.

It was our moment, and I knew it was about to be broken. It always happened this way. We had our perfect union and then...

"HEY!!! JAMIE!!! YOU IN THERE???" The call came immediately after a firm pounding on the bedroom door.

I held her close as she pushed up and away.

"Yeah... what???" she called back.

"Your dog... he got out... and the weather's getting bad..." the voice called from the other side of the door.

"Shit... James... we have to get him."

"Yeah..." I agreed.

I'd had this debate, this argument before. She won every time. It was always the dog. I could never figure out why it mattered so much--every single time, the dog ended up fine. Not Jamie.

I loved her so much that I always agreed. "Yeah... let's go find him."

----------

"Where did this weather come from?" Jamie called out.

"It's always like this," I replied.

It didn't register. We'd gotten to the point where nothing I said made a difference anymore. I couldn't change anything. Up until now, some things I did seemed to help; saying this or doing that seemed to hold it off a little longer. The storm seemed to land later this time. Maybe I was getting closer. But I already knew that this Halloween, I wasn't close enough.

"Jamie!" I called out. "We're not going to find him!"

"I have to find him!" she cried.

This time I thought I'd hold onto her; I'd just keep her close. But it wasn't working. Somehow my grip couldn't hold her. She kept slipping away. I could catch her, but I couldn't contain her. I squeezed as hard as I could, and she'd just end up outside of my reach, yelling about the fucking dog.

"We have to find him!" she yelled through the horrible wind.

"JAMIE!" I called out. "HE CAN'T BE FOUND!"

Leaves and debris flew everywhere. The sky and surroundings lit up with flashes of lightning. Thunder crashed around us, and the fabric of reality began to tear.

One minute Jamie would be next to me, maybe in my arms; the next, she'd be fifteen feet away. It was like we were screaming through wormholes. No power of mine could keep her close, keep her safe. The closer I got, the further she was ripped away from me. Over and over, until I couldn't see her anymore.

And when I finally could no longer find her, the storm lifted. Every time, it left me in the same place: standing in front of the dilapidated house in which she once lived.

----------

Anger filled my heart as I stood there. The whole thing happened so fast I didn't even know how I'd arrived. Standing in the street in the middle of the day, it ended the same way it did every year. Her house had once been perfect; now it was a rotting husk of a home that hadn't seen an inhabitant in God knows how long.

"What the fuck," I thought, looking past the overgrown landscape.

In times past, I'd stood there for hours trying to reason through what I'd experienced. But it was of no consequence. It didn't help. It would probably be the same next year, too.

I'd resolved years ago to stop by the cemetery on the way home. It was a long walk and a bit of a hike up to her headstone, but it was always worth it. It gave me temporary closure as I contemplated the events of the evening.

"Hi Babe..." I started. "I tried again. We got closer this time, but I still can't figure it out. Everything gets foggy and I can't focus. But for what it's worth, even if it's only one day a year... I love every minute with you. I miss you. I'll try again next year."