Retired not Retiring

Most people would have trouble categorising me. I've never met anyone else my age who is the same. I'm a lady in my mid sixties, recently retired. Plenty of those around. I've never been married and never had sex with anyone else. Narrowing it down a bit. You are probably imagining a dried up, little old spinster. Spinster is the only one of those that fits. I'm of average build, not bad in the figure department, for someone my age at least. Where I diverge from the picture you must have had, is my interest in sex.

I may not have had sex with a man or a woman but it doesn't mean that I don't have an interest in both. I developed an interest in masturbation as a young woman and it has never left me. I like to imagine having sex with other people, while doing it for myself. That way I get all of the enjoyment without the mess, or the need to please someone else. Selfish? Almost certainly but I really don't care.

My interest goes way beyond diddling my clit. If I was a young man, I'd be called a porn hound. My laptop is full of pictures and videos. When I was working it filled my evenings. Now, I can watch, finger and toy to my hearts content. All day long if that's how the mood takes me.

I know that a lot of women have sex toys. From what I can gather, a handful is usual. I have a cabinet full of them. No need to hide them as nobody gets to visit my bedroom. I keep up with developments. When I started, they were hard plastic and noisy. They moved on to rubber coated, then silicone. I've got them all in various shapes and sizes. I'm so grateful for the more modern stuff. The magic wand certainly lives up to it's reputation, as does the rabbit. My current crush is a remote control one. I pop it inside and control it with my phone. I adore the feelings it gives me, not just the physical ones from the vibrations but the liberation to sit on the bus, wander round the shops or sit in a cafe and masturbate, without anyone knowing.

So, you may have worked out, I'm not your average old lady. I'm a sexual obsessive but on my own terms. When I was working, I loved hearing the young women talking. When I was their age, sex was talked about but more in a guarded, hinted at way, using euphemisms. Things have become a lot more open as time has gone on. Young women these days don't seem to have any boundaries. I love that. They'd talk about things which would never have happened in my day. I put it down to how ubiquitous porn has become. When I was a young woman, nobody would admit to letting a bloke fuck them in the arse or shoot cum over their faces, even if they did it. I've heard both described in detail, whilst in the women's toilets. I'd emerge from my cubical and give them a fright.

"Thanks for that. I needed a wank."

I like to shock, when I can. Women seem to have different rules of behaviour in certain circumstances. The toilets in bars and the changing rooms in shops particular favourites of mine. They seem to think that once the door is shut or the curtain is pulled across they are on their own and nobody else can hear them. I hear them talk. Some masturbate and I've even heard some of them having sex. I always try to hang around long enough to thank them for the entertainment. Some are horrified but most seem happy that I enjoyed it.

Like the title hints at, I'm not the shy and retiring type. You don't comment on other people having sex, if you are. More recently, I've started joining in, not with them but in the adjoining cubicle or changing room. I've even been initiating things myself. I'll use a vibrator in a toilet cubicle, so that it is obvious what I'm doing. I never really know what sort of orgasm I'm going to have. Most of the time, I'm fairly quiet but occasionally one creeps up on me that would rattle the windows. In certain shops, I won't fully close the curtain in the changing rooms. I'll only do this if I'm certain that no men are likely to see. I don't want to inflame their passions. Women I've found, are more likely to watch and appreciate than barge in and want to satisfy themselves at my expense.

Some will plant themselves outside, watch me strip off and touch myself. Others will walk back and forth past the opening, having a quick peek as they do. I love knowing that even at my age I'm of some interest to someone.

I've been at this for a few months, particularly in the more expensive clothes shops. They don't rush you trying things on. Not that I buy much. Mostly, I don't even try the clothes on, I just use the cubicle. On one particular day, I was down to my underwear and enjoying a particularly sensual masturbation session, when the curtain opened briefly and closed completely as a young woman stepped inside. One of the sales assistants in a dark blue jacket and skirt. I suppose it was only a matter of time before I got busted. I was expecting her to call the police and get me escorted out.

"Don't worry. I won't hurt you."

"I know you won't."

She was a frail looking thing, with freckles and glasses. A strong gust of wind would have blown her over.

"I won't tell. I've been watching you, for weeks now. I hope you don't mind."

"If I did, I would have closed the curtain."

I said nothing more, carrying on to a rather satisfying orgasm. That was the closest I'd come to having sex with someone. There had always been a cubicle door, partition or curtain separating me from anyone else and the same went when I was listening. This was new different, difficult to come to terms with. Giving women a show was one thing, having her so close was another. I'm down with the kids, not. She's a geek, a nerd. What in my day would be been called a swot. Not because of academic endeavour but just the way she looks.

I'm not maternal. If I were, I'd have sought out a man long ago. The initial feeling I had for her was pity. That such a young woman felt the need to get her kicks from me was worrying. I dressed and followed her to the counter. I wrote down my address on the pretext of ordering something in a size they didn't have in stock. I wondered if she'd use it. I wanted to talk, did she?

Five days passed before there was a knock at my door. Still in her work clothes, her name badge showing her to be called Faye. I invited her in. She looked terrified.

"I'm not a wicked witch, just a horny old lady."

That seemed to break the ice.

"I didn't know if I should come. I thought I owed you an explanation."

"You don't owe me anything. I'll admit I was surprised. I know people see me, that's the intention. Nobody has ever come in before."

"I really am sorry about that but I've really enjoyed what you do. I wouldn't dare."

"I've reached a point where I don't care. Although, I thought you were going to get me arrested."

She put her hand to her mouth to disguise a giggle. She was still trembling. I poured us both a glass of wine. It was only six in the evening but why not. We sat and talked, for more than an hour. Despite our age difference, she's only twenty seven, we aren't that dissimilar. No interest in men. A slight one in women but without the social skills or confidence to follow it through. Her performance at work was just that, an act, put on for the customers. It took half of the time she was with me, to tease that out of her. She still lives at home with her parents. Like me she had an extensive porn collection on her laptop. Unlike me, no toys. Not wanting her mother to find them. Just like me a frequent masturbator. She'd gone to the staff toilets after I'd left her. Before she left, she shared something remarkable with me. She introduced me to an online forum that she uses. We set up an account for me.

After she'd gone I had a look at some of the discussions going on, anonymous for the most part, the usernames didn't even give away the gender of the user, nor did their profiles. However, most seemed to be like myself and Faye, interested in sex but not with anyone else. Not in the sense most people would understand. Faye had obviously got home, I received a friend request from the username she'd given me. I pointed her to the thread I'd found. A PM arrived with a smiley face and a thumb up.

What are we looking at here? Mutual masturbation. Not as you would normally consider it, doing it to each other but being in the same room, like Faye had been. The devotees, on the forum praised the virtues of it, pairs of men, pairs of women and seemingly heterosexual couples who don't fuck. Yes, this old lady uses the F word. There were even groups who got of on it, literally. That sounded really interesting but from what I'd learned about Faye, too much for her, for now.

Having access to the forum felt great. A place to express my feelings and opinions without anyone being offended. I wasn't bothered that people knew more about me than most. Older, single women seem to be only a small fraction of those who logged in, even though there are thousands of members, from all over the globe.

Through PM's I arranged for Faye to visit on Sunday. She didn't want to use her phone, for fear of her parents finding out. Less terrified but clearly still very nervous, she stood on my doorstep looking around furtively, as though what we were about to do was illegal. I invited her in and we resumed the conversation we'd had the previous week. I'd have stripped of and begun masturbating as soon as the front door was shut but I think she needed some reassurance and time to adapt to what had to be difficult for her.

A couple of glasses of the red stuff eased her mood. Carrying what was left of the second glass, I showed her upstairs. The first person I'd ever taken into my bedroom. Her jaw dropped as she saw the tall, glass fronted cabinet full of sex toys. I opened the doors for her. She put her hand out but drew it back.

"They're all scrupulously clean. I might be dirty in one sense but not in all." I said.

There can't be many things I haven't bought over the years, some more successful than others. There are a few I've only used once. You don't know until you try them. Reviews are good but everyone is different. Faye picked up, examined and replaced a fair proportion of them.

"Want to see a more relaxed, less risky version of what you saw before?"

She nodded nervously. I'd been stood, leaning back against the wall, feet planted wide apart, still in my bra and pants, in the changing room. I undressed slowly for here to watch. I'm not sure what a pretty young woman was getting from looking at me but she was fascinated, her eyes constantly scanning up and down my body, as each item of clothing was removed. Although a few people will have seen bits of me, this was the first time I'd given anyone such a close look. I was totally naked before her. I stood and let her take in what I've got, both from the front and back. Assuming she'd be interested in the most intimate part of me, I'd trimmed my pubic hair slightly shorter than normal. Can't have the spiders legs getting caught in your knicker elastic.

No standing against the wall now, more comfortable propped up by the pillows on the bed. Faye, still fully dressed in jeans and a blouse, positioned herself at the foot of the bed, prime viewing location. With time on our side, I was determined to give her the show of her life. I've always liked my breasts, not large but nicely shaped. I think my nipples are a little on the small side but they are sensitive, touching them gives me a tingle. I spent plenty of time on them, which Faye seemed to appreciate. I ran my fingers up and down my stomach, brushing the upper edge of my pubic triangle. I was surprised how much fun I was having. All the more so, when Faye's hand move to undo he jeans.

She was struggling with the tight metal button, so I waited for her, to get it undone and slide down the zip. To this point my legs had been together. As my hands made contact with my thighs I inched them apart. The look on Faye's face was almost as good as the view she must have been getting. I could see her hand moving inside what appeared to be a large pair of white pants. They were larger than any I've got.

I kept things slow and easy, by now, she must be able to see into my vagina. I was totally shocked, as she collapsed on the floor. So much so that I stopped what I was doing and edged towards the end of the bed, to make sure she was alright. She was gasping for air. I stroked the top of her head.

"Faye. Faye. Look at me."

Slowly she tilted her neck and looked at me.

"OK?"

"Sorry. I spoiled it."

"No you didn't. The important thing is that you are alright."

Tears were welling up in her eyes.

"Hey. Enough of that. You've done nothing wrong."

"I couldn't help it."

"Orgasm?"

"Yes."

"Great."

She looked confused. Probably that I wasn't bothered about stopping part way there. I was more concerned about her.

"Take your time. Mind if I carry on?"

She stayed kneeling on the floor, without responding. I resumed my position on the bed and although, I'd lost some of the impetus, knowing she'd had an orgasm somehow made up for it. Besides with her low down position, arguably she now had a better view. I decided to concentrate on what she'd be able to see. No point being shy, I opened my legs wide, pulled my labia wider than they'd been before and started to finger fuck myself. I'm not interested in size, as my toy collection would have shown Faye. A couple of fingers is enough. I might never have had intercourse but it doesn't mean I don't like penetration. I haven't cum just from that but I keep trying. I get close but need a bit of clit action to bring it home. Today's finger bang possibly got me closer than I'd ever been. A few seconds on my bean and I was there. God that was a good one, I'd give it 9.5. If I'd been looking down the bed, it might have been 10. Faye was shaking. This time she was actually crying.

"Oh, lovey are you alright?"

Through her sobs and sniffs she nodded. I reached for some paper tissues from beside the bed and handed them to her. She took them and blew her nose noisily. With another she dried her eyes.

"What's wrong?"

"N n n nothing. A m mazing"

I gave her a minute.

"I've watched loads of porn. It's great but it's nothing compared to this. Sorry I came so quickly. Not cool. Not fair on you. I've never felt anything like what just happened....."

She paused.

"Faye?"

She looked embarrassed.

"Faye?"

"I've wet myself."

"Hey. Don't worry."

I was jealous. She's squirted. I've read about it, watched but never managed it myself. At least I was responsible for her doing it. Squirting by proxy.

I moved and sat on the end of the bed, wrapping my arms around her shoulders. Not wanting her to get too panicked, I went to the airing cupboard, found her a fresh towel and showed her to the bathroom. Leave your things in the hall, I'll sort them out. I'll leave you something to put on, on the end of the bed. I pulled on a dress, left a bathrobe for her, picked up her jeans and yes they are big pants and, put them in the washer/drier. She came downstairs looking a little bedraggled about ten minutes later.

"I'm so so sorry."

"Why. You enjoyed yourself."

"But...."

"Don't worry about it. Must have been a good one."

"Your fault." She said, easing up a little.

"Old aged sex pot."

She laughed.

"Better?"

She nodded.

"Old lady knickers."

"Mum buys them. She'd think I was a slut if I wore what we sell."

"Not sure what that makes me. Some of mine are crotchless and some have beads to rub your clitty."

She stayed until her pants and jeans were washed and dried. I gave her the privacy to change unobserved. OK, so she'd cum twice in my bedroom but had been fully clothed both times. She hadn't wanted to undress but if that is what she likes, I'm not going to push her to do something else.

Is there such a thing as wank buddies? If there is, that's what we became. So much so, that I wasn't bothered about missing out on my toilet and changing room time. After store early closing on Wednesday, we'd spend the afternoon together, as well as most Sundays. She'd told her parents she was out with a friend. I'm certain they wouldn't approve if they knew what type of friend. She skipped the jeans in favour of something looser. For about three weeks she stayed dressed, while reaching numerous orgasms. None so quick as her first or as messy as her second but she was definitely having a good time. She was also coming out of her shell. She'd ask me to use specific toys, watching intently as I worked them into my pussy or ran them over my clit.

It was clear to me that she had some issues. Getting off watching an old lady masturbating wasn't one of them. If there were things she wanted to tell me, she would in time. I like her company. Having her watch me played into what was clearly my exhibitionist trait. She started off being as quiet as a mouse. She isn't shouting from the rooftops but she's starting to express herself a little when she cums.

It took six weeks for her to feel comfortable enough around me, to reveal what had been holding her back. Her issues are multi layered and deep seated. Her parents and her mother in particular don't approve of sex outside marriage and masturbation is a definite no go activity. Even though Faye is an adult, she has to watch her porn in the early hours, long after her parents are asleep. It also explains her near silent orgasms. Add to that her body image issues and you have an almost perfect storm. Her mother's inability or unwillingness to discuss anything of the sort, hadn't helped and she'd retreated into the nervous little thing I'd first encountered.

To me, she looks great. I like her sandy almost auburn hair, freckles and pretty face, even the glasses she wears don't detract from it. Yes, she's thin but she she's tall enough to make her look elegant. OK, so her boobs are even smaller than my tiny titties. I've not seen them but you can tell, even with the clothes she wears. She thinks her bum is too small but I'd swap for those tight little buns in a heartbeat.

During her visits we began spending as much time bolstering her self esteem as we did masturbating. Not that we ever stinted on that. I think she liked the talk as much as the sex. As far as I can tell, she doesn't have any close friends. A few acquaintances, mostly from work. Nobody she'd share what she does with me.

Two months in and without any prompting from me, she actually removed her trousers and pants. A neat little ginger patch of pubic hair and some lovely pale skin. I was effusive in my compliments. She brushed them off but I was serious. She knelt, knees slightly apart on the end of the bed and we watched each other achieve a couple of orgasms. It was another two weeks before I saw her totally naked. My positive comments weren't lies. She may not have a high opinion of how she looks but to me she's beautiful. I think with how I was feeling, in some alternate universe I'd have been a lesbian. In this one I'm just a serial masturbator.

That was six months ago. I made a suggestion which she jumped at. I have a a three bedroomed house, not large but it's all mine.

"Want to become my lodger?"

"God yes, really?"

"Why not."

It took a fair bit of negotiation with her mother. It was like being interrogated by the Spanish Inquisition. In a way I think her mother was pleased to see her daughter becoming more independent. I believe that she was happy that I was an old lady, looking for some rent money, rather than a burly bloke or a dirty old man looking to take advantage. If only she knew. Firstly, what her daughter is really like and secondly, what I'm like. I was on my best behaviour as I showed her round the house, carefully avoiding my locked bedroom. Faye's prospective room got the seal of approval. Her father helped her move in the following week. I made him tea, after he'd finished carrying up the bags and boxes. Nice enough I suppose.

I don't want anyone to get the wrong idea about us. We're never going to become lovers. It isn't what either of us want. I already had the freedom to be myself. Now I've made it possible for Faye to have the same. Even though we live in the same house, we still converse on the forum. We masturbate on our own, often while we're tapping away on our keyboards. That is our own personal time.

We have a lot of fun together too. I was a little shocked at first, when Faye delved into the cabinet and started using my vibrators. 'What's yours is mine' I suppose. Share and share alike. She's never had the chance before, now she has unlimited access. It's fun trying to work out what she's borrowed and taken to her room. Not that she's averse to using them when we're in my room. Almost as soon as she moved in, she lay on my bed and gave me the sort of view, which had made her cum so hard when we first began this. Small, cute, pink and gorgeous.

More relaxed as time has gone on, she'll match anything I do, at least within the confines of the house. Outside of it her favourite is to take control of my phone and work the remote control vibrator. She's mean, vicious. Out and about we look like mother and daughter or more likely grandmother and granddaughter. Although, granddaughters don't wind up the vibrations on the bus. She may look meek and nerdy but she's developed a mean streak. I've had to learn to orgasm like she had, quietly. I think she takes pleasure in bringing me off at the most inappropriate times and embarrassing places. I've had orgasms at the supermarket checkout, in the doctor's waiting room, the local coffee shop and even taking money out at the bank. I can disguise it well enough and the situations make them so much more intense. I'd chastise her if it wasn't so damn exhilarating and she knows it. Back at home she'll have a good laugh about what she's done.

She's only that outgoing in the house and getting more so. She's starting to show me things that she'd been doing in the privacy of her own room at her parents and her room here. Things I've watched but never tried. I can't say that I dislike watching them particularly from her. You'd never credit, even knowing her for a while that she'd do some of the things. After almost making me pass out on the walk back from the bus stop, I was compensated by seeing her fingering not only her cute little pussy but pushing a finger into her tight little bum. I've seen plenty of anal on video. It's never interested me, not something I've ever been bothered about. Touching, occasionally, usually by accident. Faye's whole body tensed up as she came like that.

"I heard a couple of girls at work talking about it. I save it for special occasions."

"And is today special?"

"An apology for being a bit over zealous."

"A bit. You need to be careful. I could have a heart attack."

"You love it really."

She was right, I do. Although in that instant I wouldn't admit it to her. Special occasions came around fairly frequently after that. I had no wish to replicate it but watching was fascinating. Not just how she moved her finger but the impact it had on her.

I've no family. Faye doesn't know it but I'm going to leave her the house and everything in it. That way she'll be free to indulge her passion. Maybe in time she'll find someone else to share it with. When she walked in on me, it must have taken a lot of courage. Probably the bravest thing she'd ever done. That one act has changed my life and hers. Mine definitely for the better. I hope hers too, it certainly looks like it.