My Best Friend's Funeral

This story stems from comments requesting a different outcome on a previous funeral story. It's a stand-alone and unrelated, so no need to read the original.

Hope you enjoy.

Satin.

***

I quietly eased my way into the church and moved down the side isle without disrupting anyone. I was late, but happy I'd made it in time, after all this was important; we were laying my best friend to rest. He was only 49 years old, the same age as me and had died of a sudden heart attack while I was abroad.

I spotted my wife's long dark hair under the black cloche hat and mesh veil sitting on the front row with Jason's widow Gabby. I know it was inappropriate at a funeral but I had to admit Debs looked smoking hot. Her black mourning dress was extremely close fitting to her curvy figure, matching perfectly with the black nylons and stiletto heels on her shapely legs. The only jewellery was her grandmother's pearl necklace and matching earrings. She was 47 years old but as ever looked considerably younger.

Gabby was in a very similar outfit, I thought it strange that Deb's wore the longer veil; tradition dictated that was the prerogative of the widow, but maybe people weren't aware of that these days. Not that Gabby would have ever minded, like me and Jason they were the closest of friends.

They huddled into each other for support. There was something odd about the setting, I stood back trying to figure it out, both Gabby and Debs looked equally upset. It was hard to tell which of them was actually Jason's widow. The four of us were all really close; me and Jason had been best mates since our school days. We were practically family and always had been. I was pleased he and Gabby lived so close and could look out for Debs while I was working away.

For years I'd worked abroad as a journalist and news reporter. It was enthralling and exhaustive but that left Debs alone for long spells. That was all coming to an end; I was planning to retire finishing at the ripe old age of 50. My job and late return was the reason I wasn't sitting next to my wife. I didn't think I could make it back in time after reporting on a major disaster in East Africa. For once all the connecting flights aligned and I'd made it to say goodbye to my friend and raise a glass or three to him later.

At that point both Gabby and Debs stood and placed a single white rose on top of Jason's coffin next to the photograph of him. Debs continued on to the lectern, a rolling slide show of photographs with Jason at various points in his life displayed on the wall at the side. Many of them included me, especially when we were younger. There were more of the four of us together, and some with the three of them while I'd been working.

Debs was struggling to control her emotions before she spoke, "Gabby and I would like to thank everyone for coming to Jason's funeral today, he would have been delighted to see you all."

I was proud to see her holding it together; there was no way Gabby would have managed to speak. Debs went on to deliver the eulogy, detailing his child hood, how Gabby had been blessed to share a life together with him, and how it was so cruelly snatched away at such a young age.

She looked at Gabby and said Jason had been so lucky to have such loving friends in his life. Gabby smiled in return. Debs went on to say Jason had been such a kind and supportive friend; he'd been an absolute rock for both Gabby and herself.

The pall bearers removed the photograph and hoisted the coffin to their shoulders. People filed in behind, Debs was arm in arm with Gabby leading everyone out when she spotted me.

"My God Pete, how did you get here!?"

She hugged me fiercely crying on my shoulder. I gave Gabby a hug at the same time then walked with them to the burial plot. We did the final reading and threw handfuls of soil onto the coffin. The others left for the wake but I said I'd like to stay for a while.

After spending some time at the graveside I got to the wake in a daze, hardly remembering the conversations with friends and family. Debs looked uneasy glancing at me often as she fussed around with drinks and food for everyone.

In reality I was still working through the potential scenarios that might explain everything I'd seen at the funeral. I excused myself early and made my way home. It took Debs another three hours to get there, finding me at the kitchen table.

Before I had the chance to say anything she went on the attack, "I can't believe you walked out of your best friends wake!"

I could have made an excuse about all the travel but decided to tackle what was worrying me, "Well I was reassessing if he was my friend after all."

"How can you possibly say that, you've been best friends since forever?"

"Ok would you care to explain your display at the church; you looked more like the grieving widow than Gabby did?"

"Don't be ridiculous, we were all close."

I could see how unsettled she was, "Close enough for a romantic rose it would seem. And some of those comments in your speech were an eye opener including the fact that he was 'your rock'. Not to mention the way you were looking at him in some of those photos of the three of you. I think you owe me the truth at least."

"There is nothing to know!"

"I can always go and ask Gabby if you're going to lie."

"You can't do that, she has just buried her husband and is exhausted."

"Did you love him?"

I could see the panic in her eyes now, "What, no, not at all, it's not what you are thinking."

"So what am I thinking and what is it? I don't like being taken for a fool! Have a very careful think through about what you want to say to me next."

In the end she didn't say anything and stomped off. We didn't speak at all for the rest of the day and I slept in the spare room.

When the silence continued at breakfast, Debs snapped, "I don't appreciate what you are suggesting, you're paranoid! And I can't believe you've done this when we've only just buried Jason, it's so disrespectful!"

My response was short, "Fine if that's your choice, I guess we'll see, but I know for sure that you are hiding something."

***

We sat in the living room together, "I am not sure why you are here Pete, you should be trying to make it up with Debs, you've really upset her! Jason supported her for years when you weren't here."

"Is that why she was sleeping with your husband?"

She looked straight at me, "My husband and your best friend is dead Pete, and now you insult him when he is barely cold in the ground. And all of this when I have no idea how to cope without him!"

"We were all friends Gabby; at least I thought we were."

"How can you say that, we were best of friends, Jason loved you like a brother."

"But I am outside of something you all shared. The rose and the way she was looking at him in those photos, neither of you were very discreet. I have a pretty good idea what is going on and I'm going to assume the worst regardless. Some honesty from you would make it easier, quicker and less painful for all of us. I do love her, but if I don't get the truth I'll leave for good!"

"You can't do that, it would destroy her! She loves you so much, she couldn't cope without you especially now Jason isn't here!"

"So I'm not the only one she loved am I? Tell me, did she love Jason or both him and you, was I second or third on the list?"

"Don't be ridiculous she loves you more than anything on this planet. You need to speak to her. Whatever feelings were involved are all over now. I've lost my husband and you've lost your best friend, this won't do any of us any good!"

"It seems he stopped being my best friend some time ago!"

"Don't say that, he looked after her when you were away, she was a mess when you left. I doubt she would have coped without us!"

"That was good of you, nothing to gain other than getting into her knickers."

Gabby response was angry, "Jesus grow up Pete, the sex wasn't that big a deal, it reaffirmed our feelings for each other, it wasn't some sordid affair. We talked about you a lot, how you were following your dream and how brilliant you were. She didn't want to damage all of that and found a way to cope."

"That was good of her, I almost feel like I should approve."

"I could argue you were incredibly selfish Pete. How many Christmases, birthdays and anniversaries did you miss? She put it all on hold for you and deserved a life as well.

"She could have talked to me about it."

"Could she? We discussed that as well, endlessly for months. She came to the conclusion you'd always choose your career and resent anything that got in the way of that. Honestly what would you have chosen, Debs or your career?"

"I never saw it as a choice, she seemed content."

"She was content, once we settled into our... arrangement. She was always ecstatic when you were due home and devastated when you left. You leaving and her worrying about you being in danger were the hardest parts. We tried to support her, the sex was a small part of it."

She paused regaining control of her emotions, "Please Pete don't destroy her now, it's all over, move on for heaven's sake! After years of worrying about you she was looking forward to you being home and planning your retirement together."

"You and Jason have stopped all of that from happening Gabby!"

"Fuck you that's just cruel and idiotic. You've had a great marriage for years don't throw that away now! I can say this from experience, you have no idea how much of a miss your life partner is, it's totally heart breaking."

***

When I got back home, I found Debs crying at the kitchen table, I guessed Gabby had already called and explained denials weren't going to work.

"I'm sorry! I was so concerned when you first when away, then those reports on TV... Jesus Pete people were shooting at you! I was terrified but I could see you were so alive, enthralled by it all and so competent. I knew it was important for you to get those stories out. You were born to do it and I wanted that dream for you, but I was so lonely when you were away. I needed someone when you weren't here. It was just support and comfort initially; they were brilliant with me, helping me emotionally."

"But it was far more than support, wasn't it?"

"I was distraught without you! My doctor diagnosed depression, I thought I was a failure. Jason and Gabby were genuinely worried about my mental health. It wasn't a sex thing, not in the way you are thinking; we were friends more than anything. Over time he was always there for me and it became a bit of a joke, Gabby saying she'd loan Jason to me. Then he kissed me when I was upset and we didn't stop, it felt so reassuring. Gabby was there; she sat behind me, holding me and stroking my hair as Jason and I made love. It felt wonderful to be held and kissed, I felt so connected to both of them. I panicked afterward and got upset, Gabby said she thought it would help me and was no threat to either of our marriages."

"That's very community spirited of you all. You never mentioned depression to me."

"How could I, with everything you were dealing with and the danger you were in. The last thing any of us we wanted was to split us up. We thought about telling you and even discussed swapping but never thought you would go for it."

"I never got the choice but you're probably right; how long?"

It looked like she was going to be sick, "Probably your 3rd or 4th long term assignment."

"Jesus that's the best part of 20 years! I'm a complete fool! How on earth could it have been going on for so long?"

"No you're not we were careful in keeping it from you, none of us wanted to hurt you!"

"Were you in love with him?"

"That's hard to answer, we grew close and I had feelings for him but nothing like the love I have for you! I've always loved you, utterly. He provided a lot of support and reassurance."

"So what was I, someone to come back to, forgiving, reliable, gullible?"

"Come off it Pete you're the exciting one, your job, the things you've done and people you've met. If anything Jason was the stable reliable guy. I'd be lost without you; you are the love of my life and best friend. I could go on for hours listing what is good about you. My inability to cope without you and my poor actions don't reflect on you at all!"

"Yes they do, I wasn't enough to keep you faithful, not enough love or sex or whatever else it was that he gave you.

She was panicking now, "Please let us move on from it, it's ancient history."

"Your mourning for him is far from ancient history! I bet you're still thinking about your time with him, it must be nice reliving those memories. Is it just Jason you think about or is it Gabby as well?"

"I don't know what you mean."

"Yes you do."

"We all shared a bed at times, we kissed and touched but we weren't fully intimate? Jason liked to just watch us together. It wasn't all of the time, I'd go and see them once a week or so and stay over for the night. I made sure I always answered your calls and messages and we never did anything when you were home!"

"Did they ever come here to our home... and bed?"

Her eyes got big, "Sometimes, but we always stopped as soon as you said when you were coming back, usually a week or two before you got home. Keeping it from you was the right thing to do; we've had 25 fantastic years together."

Another appalling thought occurred to me, "You went on trips and holidays with them that I couldn't make, so was it more than once a week then?"

Her head dropped, "Yes we stayed together during the vacations."

"Who else knew about it?"

"No one, we were discreet, everyone just thought we were good friends, because well, that's what we were."

"Do you know how many chances I had to cheat Debs? Don't you think I didn't get lonely and scared?"

"You were always so much stronger than me. I'm so sorry Pete; you don't deserve any of this!"

"There is a bright side Debs; at least I know the prick is dead!"

She looked horrified, "Please don't say that, he was your best friend."

"You know what I did this morning; I went to the church and spat on your lover's grave."

"Oh my God you didn't, that's awful, that's... that's not like you at all."

"What was it you called him 'your rock'! I pissed on it as well, be under no illusion Debs, I hate that fucker! If he wasn't dead already I'd kill him!"

I suspected I wasn't getting full story or the whole truth, but I'd heard enough, "I'd like you to move out."

"You can't be serious; he's gone its over! We have had a whole life together and we've been so very happy."

"Only because you chose to keep me in the dark and made a total fool of me and our marriage."

I thought she was going to refuse to go, she said nothing for a few minutes, "Ok Pete, I'll go and give you time to think things through. I never meant to disrespect or make a fool of you. I realise it's very new and raw for you, but please don't close the door on us, keep talking to me. I'll do anything to make it up to you, if you struggle with anything, let me know and I'll come back over.

Is it ok to keep this between us for now? I'll just say I am visiting my sister for a few days."

I could feel myself starting to break down and didn't want her to see it, "Whatever Debs, just go!"

***

It was two weeks later when I bumped into Debs and Gabby in a local bar; admittedly I was a good way towards getting drunk... again. There was another couple with them, Jack and Melanie who we knew well.

I walked over smiling, "This is nice, what are we celebrating?"

Debs' face drained of colour, "We aren't celebrating anything Pete, at the wake our friends insisted Gabby come out when she was ready, and I made sure she kept that promise."

"Yeah that makes a change, you're not very good with promises are you?"

"This isn't the time or place Pete."

"I beg to differ, I'm curious to know if our friends knew you were cheating with Jason when I was working abroad?"

I could see Melanie's head drop, that was my answer, "Yeah I thought so, you realise you were supposed to be my friends as well, same as that fucker Jason was!"

With that pronouncement I half staggered away, Jack caught up to me, "Jesus Pete, I had no idea, why don't we go somewhere and have a few beers."

"Well that was my genius plan all along!"

We made our way to a different bar in the city centre, Jack offered to get the beers in, "You had better get me a 0% Jack, I'm pissed enough as it is and that little show back there isn't going to help things, they reckon the Guinness is good."

He did that and we sat to talk, "I'm sorry Pete I knew they were all close but I would never have thought Debs would cheat on you. I'm less than impressed that Melanie seems to know something was going on."

"Do you think all women keep secrets, maybe there's more I don't know yet?"

"Well I am certain we don't always know what they are thinking. I'm not sure most husbands would even want to know."

"It seems wives can do things and keep secrets that their husbands will never know about. All of which is to say, she cheated for a very long time with my best friend of all people, and I didn't have a bloody clue!"

"Is there any way back for you two or any room for forgiveness?"

"I can't see how, she'd prefer it if I pretended it didn't happen at all."

"So she never gave you a clue or dropped other hints?"

"No, I have to hand it to her she was good, it was so practiced, a natural born liar. It must have been a thrill to have two men chasing her, a husband and a lover. Why else did she continue for so long? When I think about it, Jason probably got more of her time than me, I was working so much! She never asked me to stop; I suppose she found a more attractive solution."

"I never thought Jason would be capable of doing that to you, you two were always so close."

"No me neither, that's some of what haunts me. I mean what was he thinking? Did he regret it at all or was he happy to get one over on me? He never seemed that sort of guy, I trusted him totally."

"Maybe he thought he was looking after her for you in some twisted way."

We went around and around it without being able to understand it further. It was good of Jack to keep me company; he even made sure I got a taxi safely home with a promise to interrogate Melanie about what she knew.

***

After the debacle at the bar, Debs came around to the house. I was trying to figure out how to say we were done, when she began talking.

"Wait Pete before you say anything, I need to reiterate a few things and I have an alternative proposal for you to consider."

"I can only wait with bated breath."

"I am sorry, sorry I did it, sorry I hurt you, sorry it was Jason, and sorry I destroyed what we had. You didn't deserve any of it! I should have been the one you could trust no matter what. My life has turned to shit and I'm the only one to blame!"

"Oh you're not the only one Debs, but go on."

"We are good together and have so many great things still to do in our lives. The thought of starting again is horrific for both of us surely! I will do anything to repair things. The truth is I am lost without you! Gabby is the same, she is really struggling without Jason and with her involvement in splitting us up, I honestly think she needs help!"

"And how does that concern me, she's hardly on my popular list."

Debs took a gulp of air and ploughed on, "She admires you Pete, always has and I've always known you like her. Now you are here and Jason is gone, so you could provide her with the support Jason provided for me."

"Jesus are you serious, your proposal involves repeating the same mistakes over again."

"No it doesn't, everything is out in the open this time, I would know about you and her and she is a widow so no one else would be misled. I really think it would help her and help you. It balances things out, and addresses that sense of fairness I know runs through your veins. You get to experience what Jason had, call it revenge or serendipity if you like."

I wasn't sure how to reply to that, so Debs took the chance to continue, "I think it would help you realise that my time with Jason isn't as bad as you're imagining it. A lot of it was just normal day to day life as friends; we weren't jumping into bed every 5 minutes."

"I could do without her pity or yours for that matter!"

"You know it's not that, you two always got on. There are other men showing an interest in her already but she's rejecting them. However she is very interested and concerned about you."

I had to admit, it would be a fantasy come true to see my wife and her best friend getting together, they were both highly attractive women. At the same time it felt like extending my current nightmare.

"Debs stood and kissed my cheek, "Think about it Pete, or come up with anything different you want and I'll do my best to make it happen. I'll do anything to stay together with you!"

"You should know I have submitted my resignation Debs, I need a new start."

She didn't flicker, "That could be even better Pete, imagine it was the three of us, it would be so much more fun and we could all build a new life together."

"And is that option available if it's just us?"

"Why do you ask that? I've seen how you've looked at Gabby over the years and we can hardly abandon her after she just lost her husband."

"I am just working out if you're doing this for me or for her. I mean you love her as well don't you?"

"I've never really thought about loving another woman but we are very close?"

Debs stayed in constant contact after that, calling often and checking how I was doing. Gabby took to doing the same, calling in with home cooking and saying she was making sure I was fed properly while Debs was away.

***

I was sitting in my local pub perusing the menu and enjoying a nice cold pint when they walked in. Every eye in the place followed them from entry to my table.

They were totally glammed up with heels, fitted dresses and nylons. Judging from the bumps in the tight dresses, they were wearing stockings and suspenders. Gabby looked stunning, with an amazing hour glass figure and a lot of cleavage on show. Her beautiful long auburn hair was pinned up; she looked good enough to eat. Debs was equally impressive, all legs, heels clicking on the tiled floor and flowing hair.

Damn I was too easy to track down, the local pub becoming my second home in recent weeks.

"Do you mind if we take a seat?"

"It's a free country."

They sat either side of me both crossing their legs and showing an expanse of nylon covered thigh.

Gabby took Debs's hand and gave it an encouraging squeeze, that seemed to give her the courage to start talking, "Pete, we wanted to demonstrate what would be involved in the proposal I made to you. We are both here for you, you can leave with both or either one of us and we will do everything in our powers to ensure you have the best night of your life. Forget the past, what would you do if two reasonably attractive and very willing females offered you pure uncomplicated sex tonight?"

"Is this some kind of joke or a trick, trying to demonstrate what I am missing?"

Gabby replied, "The answer to your question is no and yes. It isn't a joke and we are absolutely trying to demonstrate what you are missing!"

She made sure the hem of her dress was riding up her thigh as she crossed her legs, "You can look Pete, I wore them for you and we're both wearing matching corsets."

Deb continued, "We are the one missing things Pete. We are sexual women and need male company and you're the best male we know! You just have to say the word and we'll satisfy all of your needs, you can have us anyway you like. No complications or commitments, it's nothing to do with reconciliation or relationships, we'll blow, swallow and fuck you any way you want!"

I think I was dumbstruck, Gabby continued, "You deserve this Pete and I'm more than happy to be involved. Debs has told me about how much she always loved being in bed with you and I'd like to experience that; it would do us all the world of good."

Gabby leant over showing off her ample cleavage and rested her hand on my leg, "I very much want to tempt you Pete if you'll have me, I'd like to fuck your brains out. And just imagine... Debs on all fours with your cock buried inside her nice hot quim, begging you for more, I know I'd love to see that!"

Jesus it was like a full on porn script, but the pain of their betrayal still burned brightly, "Is that what Jason got... Debs on all fours with his cock buried inside her?!"

That response threw them as I continued, "And will you both be auditioning for another cock if I am away for a while, or will you make do with each other?"

Debs frowned, "We'd be all yours baby, no one else would ever be involved."

"I've heard that somewhere before in some vows a long time ago."

Just then a very pleasant looking lady approached our table, "Sorry Pete is this a bad time?"

"No not at all, you're exactly on time Lisa, I'd like to introduce you to my soon to be ex-wife Debs and her friend Gabby, they were just leaving!"

Lisa smiled pleasantly, "It's lovely to put faces to names, Pete has told me so much about you. I have to say you both look absolutely fabulous."

The truth was Debs and Gabby looked tarty compared to the lovely summer dress and natural looks of Lisa.

Debs appeared both sad and angry, "OK Pete we'll go but I am not an 'ex' wife just yet, and there is plenty of time for you to come to your senses."

Lisa sat as they clip clopped out of the bar, "Wow that is some stiff competition Pete."

"Do you really think so; I hardly noticed them once you came in."

"Oh that's very slick Pete, but thank you anyway."

"Honestly Lisa, that's all done with, neither of them are people I can trust."

"Interesting, so are we ordering or not? I'm famished and you need to keep your strength up."

"Do I? Oh right that's well... great."

Lisa laughed, it was a light pleasant sound, "Never thought I'd catch you short of words Pete, and turning those two down for me deserves some sort of reward."

That night with Lisa was pure bliss; I'd never had sex for months, since leaving on my last assignment. We could barely keep our hands off each other; making out as soon as we crossed the threshold, inching our way upstairs to the bedroom; kissing passionately, our mouths mashed together.

I wanted to kiss every inch of her and did so while removing her dress, bra and thong in the process. She lay back and spread her legs, her exposed pussy was completely shaved. Her look had an expectation of me going down on her. Lust overcame me and I dived between her thighs, licking and kissing with abandon with her squealing in delight.

She encouraged me constantly, instructing me where and what felt good, as she began to convulse. I moved up her body and rammed my cock into her, driving in and out rapidly with her encouragement, that had the effect extending her orgasm.

"Oh yes baby, fuck me! Give me that cock, arrgghhh that's it, just like that!"

I did exactly that, giving her all that I had, the speed was no less than furious. She delighted in my lust, encouraging me to fuck her harder and squirming beneath me. Another wave of orgasm washed over her. I felt my balls tense up before the ecstasy of release as I thrust my cock as deep as it could possibly go, holding it there for pulse after pulse.

That wasn't the end of it; we had another two more bouts. I don't know if she was competing with the idea of Debs and Gabby but she put everything into it. I was literally blown away. She was eager, enthusiastic and determined to satisfy. It was truly astonishing, urgent and erotic with a heightened intensity of feelings and emotions. By the end, we were both physically and emotionally drained, falling into a deep sleep and not waking until mid-day.

***

Jason's will had taken an age to pass through probate; Debs, Gabby and I were asked to attend the reading. I had no idea why, everything he had would just pass to Gabby surely. We were surprised to see another woman about our age and young man maybe in his early 20s in the lawyer's office. The lawyer did the introductions, the woman 'Penny' had worked with Jason for a number of years and the young man was her son Rick.

I soon found out why I was there, Jason had left me his prized Porsche 911. Gabby smiled saying that made sense as she could never drive it properly.

Debs looked equally happy as if it confirmed my friendship with Jason, "I knew he would leave his best friend something."

"Oh I don't think so Debs, he just felt guilty about shagging my wife so often. It's probably got more miles on the clock than you!"

She looked devastated, Gabby hugged her giving me the evil eye. I sat there thinking about how soon I could get it crushed and invite them to see it. Then I could explain how it feels to see something you love completely destroyed and there not being a single thing you can do about it.

My ruminations were interrupted by far more shocking news. It turns out Rick was the result of Jason's long running affair with Penny. Gabby and Debs couldn't believe it and denied it all. Penny must have anticipated that as she has already DNA proof filed with the lawyer. It turned out Jason had paid child support for years. The upshot was Penny and her son were to receive half of Jason's estate.

Gabby wasn't going to get anywhere near as much money as she thought, especially as Jason had secretly re-mortgaged their house. It turns out my supposed best friend was a complete snake to everyone, not just me!

Gabby and Debs couldn't believe Jason had cheated on them both! I found that fact hilarious; it burned their image of a romantic affair and as Jason as some sort of saviour.

***

Despite her protestations I progressed the divorce from Debs. There was no nonsense about mandatory counselling in our courts but she managed to delay things. That just cost her money as I spent freely and pre-booked a number of trips. We sold our house, it held bad memories for me anyway and I didn't intend to be in one place very long.

I did get to know Penny and Rick, he was a nice kid and deserved a lot better than Jason's piss poor efforts at being a father. I decided not to crush the car and gave it to him along with some advanced driving lessons.

Gabby's was not a happy camper when she found out. She struggled with all the bills and costs and had to sell her house. Unsurprisingly she moved into a flat with Debs. They never did give up on trying to get me back, and swore they would never choose another man. That might make a nice fantasy but it wasn't what I wanted in real life.

I was very interested in Lisa however and was seriously thinking about popping the question. No not that question, not yet anyways! No the question was about going on an around the world vacation with me. I'd planned it for years and wanted to visit beautiful places where there was no war or violence. And it would help to establish if Lisa and I had a long term future together.

Not that I'd forgiven him, but I reduced the amount of times I pissed on Jason's grave to the anniversary of his death. Each time I celebrated another year of life that he didn't get and consoled myself that it was probably the stress that had killed him.