Voyager’s Rest Chapter 5

Chapter - 5

The acceleration was absolutely exhilarating. As a human, I'm afraid your organs would be compressed into mush by the velocity forces. However, if your bodies could sustain the pressure I couldn't recommend it enough.

The counter weight releases and flings our capsule away from the surface. Our world has no atmosphere for us to fly into. Pure acceleration feels like time slowing down for a fraction of a second as we move from one state of motion to another so outside of our general experience there are very few ways I might explain the sensation.

The light patterns which emanate from my body as our way of communication are usually dim and subtle. In the moment of launch I was radiating light from my body in a scream of fear, thrill and delight beyond any howl I had ever screamed out before. I think I embarrassed 3Stan. I looked over at him for a moment and he was dark, inert, quiet to the point of seeming like a corpse next to me and the thought of it made me sad.

The dread of danger had not really entered my mindset up until that moment of looking at 3Stan and imagining him gone from the world of the active. Moving across continents was dangerous no matter what mode of transportation was chosen. We were moving into territory that was dangerous out of the nature of scarcity and cultural separation. Add the concern of the wrong people knowing about our mission to identify an orbiting anomaly and our lives had suddenly become an adventure. Such an experience of living at the edge of mystery and danger was something I had dreamed of all my life. Here I was at the event horizon of adventure. Looking at 3Stan in that moment of thrill for me was a wake up call. This was real. This was dangerous and not just to me.

"Wow! This is incredible!" I shouted my pleasure at 3Stan in an attempt to reactivate him.

He leaned in my direction and smiled in appreciation of my joy without reciprocating the emotion and then turned back and refocused his silence.

He was fine, I told myself. I wanted to savor this experience and I grinned for an hour until I started to feel ill.

We had drawn in as much mineral sustenance as we could before we were launched. Without direct contact with minerals from the soil of the planet we begin to cool our metabolism. Given too long without a renewal of minerals the central core of us will cool and become inert. Death from starvation as you might imagine it. Without taking in minerals we weaken even only after a few hours.

3Stan seemed to weather the fasting better than I. He had done it before, but not in the luxury of a transport cabin. When the asteroid came, which killed his siblings, his parents and he were the only ones of his family to survive. They drew in as much nutrient as possible and carried more on their backs and started the dangerous journey across the scaffold girders in hopes of a better life on Prima. Their starvation nearly killed 3Stan's protectors and they never recovered their full structural integrity. Their body lattice became frail and their metabolism cores became dim no matter how much pure mineral was ingested from the fertile ground of Prima. Once they touched soil on Prima it was up to 3Stan to be the caretaker. That burden and those experiences were prime moments which made him the pillar of strength and reserve that I cared for so much.

He was calm as the asteroid we were traveling towards rose into view. I was anything but. The feeling of my life draining away coupled by the looming specter of the rocky surface of our destination rocketing closer I felt dread deep within myself. There was a part of me screaming that we were about to die. There was a primal voice clearly signaling that it was time to panic. Strapped in our reclined seats as we were, there was nothing I could do but struggle to contain myself. I pressed and squirmed against the restraints and shifted myself looking for an exit, looking for someone who would let me out and off of this casket of doom.

There was a brief moment of calm inside of myself as I looked out at the asteroid surface which we were rushing toward with incredible speed. It was the end of all things and my mind told me there was nothing left but to experience the final moments of existence. Looking out the window I saw the lights of the landing port. The shapes of homes and facilities built to accommodate travelers moving from one continent to another. It was beautiful and thrilling. So much of my life was built on dreams of an adventure like the one we were on and now I found myself letting go of those aspirations. Finding myself wanting to turn and run away from oblivion and danger made me ashamed in the moment. The last thing I would think was that I wasn't strong enough, not brave enough to be the person I hoped I could be.

The capsule hit the recovery net and we lurched to one side as our speed and vector changed in an instance of violent redirection. Spinning around a large pole we felt the world spin and equilibrium calibration inside of ourselves was useless. I wanted to purge all of myself down to the framing lattice and central heart but I was too weak and panicked to do anything but draw within myself and let the whatever was to happen unfold.

3Stan touched my shoulder as the capsule had come to a stop and then began to lower to the surface. I had blanked out and became inert for a moment. 3Stan's touch felt reassuring. It was an indication that we still lived. If for no other reason I was grateful for the touch. There was empathy in his touch as well. He didn't let on that he knew the deep regret of cowardice I was feeling but his touch and his expression washed some of my shame away in the moment as I felt myself draw back to life.

Passing through that glimpse of my own demise was a rite of passage which allowed me to continue. 3Stan understood how fragile life is. I thought I did. My life had been theory up to this point with nothing to compare to the life 3Stan had experienced. Life is fragile everywhere one goes. On Prima this was especially so. I knew this. It was a core tenant of our culture and community that what is will pass and be rebuilt again in new forms. I had never felt it before that moment with 3Stan's hand on my shoulder.

We were unbuckled from our seats and rose unsteadily as we exited the capsule. We were ushered to a space off the main path where we could regain our mineral sustenance. My feet touched the giving sands and I drew them into myself. As a human, you might know the experience as a draw of water into yourself after walking through your deserts. I was warming. Both, comforting and life renewing.

3Stan turned to me, "You're ok."

It could have been a question, but it wasn't. It was a statement of fact that my inner self needed to be reminded of. I was ok.

"I'm ok." I said, confirming what 3Stan already knew to be true.

We stepped from the rejuvenation sands and onto the platform. It was an amazing example of engineering. This asteroid was purposed for our travel. Occupied by our people and made a part of the world in which we existed. It was a space outside of the world and as I looked to the open blackness of space I saw the vast void in its depth. There were no stars shining as you may have seen on your beautiful world. The dark sky that was seen from Prima as we looked away from our Prima sun was nothing but darkness. It was called, the Void, and it was "known" by all the science and all educated of us that beyond that veil was nothing. All that pieced that horizon was lost and ceased to exist.

This "knowing" that our culture had decided on was why our anomaly was so dangerous to the status quo. If an artifact from before the breaking had been launched out into the void and returned it would upend all that was settled science.

There was a viewing platform at the edge of the escarpment where you could look down upon the world below. The ground below us sped by, but you could make out enough to know where the cities were. They lit up great stretches of land and as our people continued to grow our communities as well as plant artificial trees, shrubs, animals and insects with the intent to rebuild a facsimile of the world as it was before the breaking. There was hope in the sight of all the effort being done to repair a broken world. A world as broken as ours could easily cause some to give up and that was certainly the case for many in the router continents.

"This is amazing." 3Stan remained quiet as I looked up at him.

"Graben is really making progress in their rebuilding. The stitching they've done. It is an engineering miracle." 3Stan was looking out into the dark void rather than the world below.

"I haven't been to Burchan in a very long time." 3Stan finally broke his silence.

I was happy to hear his voice again and decided to let him speak when he was ready to continue. There was a wait, but not long.

"My siblings grew and died there. My family struggled to build there. It is the place that made me."

"I know. I'm excited to see it." I didn't know how to respond to him. It felt like he wasn't speaking to me. His voice directed out to the void.

"It looks a lot like Prima now. Full of Prima trees. Prima art and structures. Prima families. We were wiped clean and Prima found a new canvas."

"I know." I felt the pain of guilt and cultural culpability again as I knew that Prima had exploited the devastation of Burchan all those years ago.

"Whatever this is. This thing that we are looking to find. It belongs to everyone." 3Stan had turned from the void now to address me directly. "There is a discovery here. We've stumbled onto something. We'll confirm it at the Burchan station and it will be a Burchan discovery."

It took me a moment to process what he was saying. We were professors at the Prima learning center. We had been sent by 10Ant, financed by the Prima council. We were headed to an observation center built by funds and effort put forth by Prima. How could this be considered a Burchan discovery? Looking up at 3Stan my expression asked the question.

"There is still a culture there, in Burchan. A people who create trees the Burchan way. There are creatures that we developed with dozens of legs used for their movement and some creatures with no legs at all that use their bodies to..." 3Stan stopped himself from continuing his monolog about the creature craft of the people of Burchan. "There is a history, a way of being that my family helped create still breathing and living there despite Prima. I want our discovery to stay. I want this to be for my family. Are you ok with that?"

I was stunned into silence as I worked through his declaration and question. What would it even mean to claim any discovery for Burchan? Was there a Burchan cultural science council analogous to Prima's? I had no idea. Prima was paying for our expedition. We were sent by them. Making a claim against Prima would put us in breach of our duty. There was to much to process in the moment but clearly 3Stan wanted an answer of some sort.

"I don't know what to say. We don't even know if there is a, 'discovery', to claim. I think we need to stay focused."

"This is important." 3Stan said with a certainty that bordered on a command.

"Of course it is important. 3, we wouldn't be here if we didn't think so, but we don't know." I pushed back but as gently as I could. I didn't want to upset him.

"We know. I know." There was frustration and emotion in his response.

"That is not a statement of science. We need to..."

"I'm not letting them have this. I'm sorry 6, If... Ok. If this is what we think it is we present it to the continental union as an artifact belonging to us all. 6Q. I want. Can I count on you?"

I suddenly realized this was why 3Stan had been so quiet on the transport here. This had been building inside of him. The anomaly had sparked something. Going home to Burchan. All of this together. It was a side of him I hadn't known.

"Ok. 3Stan. We can talk about this when we get to the observation station. Until we know, we don't know."

"We need to decide right now. If this turns out to be an artifact from the before time. We need to decide now that we will act in the interest of all of Prima, not just..."

I had never known 3Stan as a political person but clearly he had kept hidden his thoughts from everyone including me. There was a good reason for his silence. There is no way he would have been allowed a position at the school for one thing and he certainly wouldn't have been granted research funds for another. He was brilliant, but when culture and loyalty and historical resentment fester, the very wisest of intellects can act out of resentment and anger. I couldn't believe that 3Stan was some sort of cultural radical.

"Ok." I finally agreed to 3Stan's terms. "For all of the continents. For all of us. Our discovery will be shared. It should be right? I don't think Prima could argue that an artifact can be just one groups." Even as I formed the words I felt my inner dilemma. I felt my loyalties being pulled thin and I worried when pushed I wouldn't know what was right.

3Stan seemed to accept my statement as it was and didn't push me on the clear cross loyalties that I was grappling with internally. We spent the rest of the journey pointing out interesting features below us. We discussed the way the fissures of Grabon would have fit together before the moment of unmaking and speculated as to what it might have looked like in the before times.

3Stan pointed out one of the geological shapes looked like a giant face carved out of mountain ranges and dark spaces shaped by shadow. I laughed and told him it looked more to me like two feet sticking out the land as if a giant had jumped from our perch above and landed head first.

"Only you would see feet where a person's eyes should be." 3Stan laughed and we headed back to the launch facility.

The launch and capture center was a bustling hub of activity, with people for all of the major continents traveling for a variety of reasons. Only the wealthy could travel this way but there was still a wide variety of individuals to be seen.

Each community had their own hue which came from the types of minerals which were ingested regularly. Prima has sands which were nearly pure silica while Burchan's soils were more blended causing a striping effect. 3Stan's complexion was mostly yellow tinted as was mine due to the yellow silica tint from Prima soil but there were stripes of red staining that streaked across his back showing that his roots had been Burchan soil. It made him exotic in Prima. As with all things cultural it served as a blessing and a curse.

I watched the people waiting for the outbound capsule to be readied and marveled at the diversity. There were those from Tessellate who were almost completely cobalt blue. A delegation was speaking with a group from Grabon who had a gradient look as though greens and reds were smeared across their bodies. It was all very charming and interesting to observe. There was one person who stood separate from the others. His coloring I knew very well from the electronically broadcast stories sent to our homes and shown on communication screens. His people were from the furthest reaches of our world. The trailing continent in contrast to Prima's leading edge as we orbited around our Prima star. Kalut's sands were mostly burnt and useless. As the people there drew the soil into themselves more that 80% was not useful for consumption and metabolism. Their visage is coal blackness with streaks of color striating through themselves. They often were cast as dangerous savages in the children stories of Prima.

As I gaze upon this individual I felt a primal chill of fear that I correlated to my own conditioning as a child of Prima. The dangerous Kalut that would climb the girders and steal Prima children was a common theme of many of our childhood nursery rhymes. It wasn't a thing that happened. There were no recorded instances of such kidnappings or raids but a story is a powerful thing to a growing mind and what we fear has no interest in what reality and evidence has to offer.

"Are you worried he is going to hunt you down and steal your essence?" 3Stan says as he catches me staring at the Kalut.

"No. Of course not."

There is a legend that Kalut's will steal the metabolic heart of enemies vanquished in battle to power themselves. It was a powerful image. And there had been reports of Kalut soldiers doing just what the legends suggested.

"You should go talk to him." 3Stan said, smiling.

"Um. Why?" My reticence wasn't simply out of lack of reason to speak, it was coupled with that childhood fear to speak to a Kalut as well. I knew this. I understood my own bias and it did very little to temper the emotion.

"When will you have the chance to speak to a Kalut again? It will give you another story to tell."

He wasn't wrong. I didn't like being a slave to my biases and childhood understandings of the world. I moved myself away from 3Stan. Knowing that he was behind me, watching, gave me a sense of safety as I approached the brooding Kalut.

"Um. Hello. I am 6Question 23 - Prima. I thought I would introduce myself. I've never met a Kalut before."

There was silence from the Kalut. No movement. No acknowledgment of my presence in any way.

"This is my first trip off of Prima and I've already learned a lot about just how big the world is, you know. There are so many interesting aspects of our knitted planet that we forget about. Are you traveling for business?"

To myself I sounded like a Prima child. All of my inexperience, sheltering and privilege seemed to be laid bare in front of this Kalut who wasn't interested in even acknowledging my proximity to him.

Then he turned to me. His face was dark in silence. I anticipated his lighted skin to speak something to me. Communicate to me that he wasn't interested in speaking to a Prima fool. Instead, his skin erupted into indiscernible light patterns which I had no way to decode. He moved towards me and waved his arms and stretched his body into a towering figure. All I could do was raise my hands in a signal that I was not a threat and back away slowly.

Once I had made significant distance between myself and the Kalut, he settled himself back down in his previous brooding posture.

Returning back to 3Stan I was visibly shaken.

"Kalut do not speak the Prima language or the Burchan." 3Stan chuckled.

"You knew this?"

"Of course. He likely thought you were making fun of him in an arrogant Prima sort of way."

I was upset that 3Stan set me up but couldn't stay mad at him for long as he was very pleased with himself and his smile was infectious.

I wasn't familiar with the disembarking procedure from the asteroid until that moment. The stewards brought over what looked like tall metallic egg shaped cocoons. They made gestures of invitation for us to step into slit openings in the eggs.

Once inside everything was dark as the slit was sealed with a ribbon of adhesive tape. I felt myself panic again. We had not been given a chance to draw minerals as we had done on the trip up to the asteroid. If I were to be stuck in this case for the same length of time I would starve. I didn't know what was happening and felt my metabolism burn my reserves of minerals even faster. I shouted for 3Stan but we can only "hear" each other when we are in visual contact. Our words carry by the patterns glimmering on our bodies and no light would escape this capsule

There was a rush of forward momentum and I felt movement, slow at first and then greater and greater speeds as I tumbled in space. What I didn't know was that leaving the asteroid was far more simple than arriving. The pod was a protective layer to help absorb the impact onto the continent but other than that we were tossed into the air so that the gravitational pull of the Burchan continent would simply pull us to our destination.

It seemed like an eternity of falling but in reality it was just a few moments. I gave way to my inner coward and screamed myself into mindless release as I tried to sooth myself in isolation. The impact came without warning and cut my screams off as the metallic egg shattered and I found myself bouncing across the sands of Burchan.

My body laid prone in the soil of this new place, familiar only to 3Stan. He would be my guide and my mentor in our adventures here. I breathed in the minerals into my body. Normally we draw minerals from our feet and let them draw themselves up through capillary action to the very top of our head. Laying in the soil as I was I simply drew sustenance into myself from all the places my flesh touched the ground. There was a different "taste" to these ingredients. There was a flavor to the land that was unknown to me until then.

My body was full of the materials of Burchan and his land would now forever be a part of my experience of myself. As I sat up, 3Stan walked up and helped me to my feet.

"Welcome to my home, 6Q." The joy of homecoming was obvious on 3Stan's expression. His joy for the return was infectious and I couldn't help but share in the emotion. All my doubts and fears were lost for that moment. This was an amazing adventure and I would do all I could to embrace it. Everything, I thought to myself, was going to be alright.