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It was Friday the 23rd of December. I had finished up at work for the holidays that afternoon and had gone to meet a some friends in the local Irish bar to have a few drinks. The next day I was going home to my parents' house to celebrate Christmas with them. The mood in the bar was one of merriment and, what with me being on my fourth Guinness, I was also feeling particularly merry. We had been talking about, music, films and our plans for the holidays. As it was only two days before Christmas the bar appeared to be doing a good trade with lots of people coming in and out. I was sitting at a table next to my buddy Nick, we both had our backs to the door. Steve looked up as the door opened; he had done this every time someone had entered the bar. We all thought he was waiting on someone coming in but no; Steve told us he was just keeping his eyes open for a potential Christmas lay. On this occasion he sat up in his chair. "Guys," he started looking over my shoulder, "take a look at what's just walked in. Nick and I tried to casually look. I was making out that I was just having a look out the window, but my eyes paused temporarily on the woman who had just walked in. I knew it was she who had attracted Steve's attention.
"Oh," I said "I work with her."
"How do you get any work done with that in your office?" Steve asked.
I sighed. "'That' is called Angela."
"I meant that fine ass, numbnuts."
"That's a hella rack, too." Said John from beside Steve. Nick just produced a slow whistle of appreciation. Angela did indeed have a fine ass and a hella rack; I had first hand experience of both, but I wasn't about to tell them that.
Angela was with Emma, another girl from the office, and Pete. I really hated Pete. He was one of these people you thought he was better than everyone else. He was the same pay grade as me but acted like he was my superior; telling me off for small mistakes, belittling me in front of other staff. I had once been dragged into my manager's office because Pete had fucked up and tried to pin the blame on me. I was able to prove the error had been made by Pete which got him into trouble and since then he had been relentless in his hatred towards me. So why was Angela here with him?
They took a table near us but none of them looked over towards us which suited me just fine. I carried on with my drink while the rest of my table carried on shooting glances at Angela.
"Go over and talk to her." Steve said to me.
"Why? I spoke to her a few hours ago, and we're off the clock now."
"Don't talk to her about work, talk to her about me. Is she single?"
"I've no idea." I replied, sighing again. I knew she was, but Steve didn't need to know. "Besides," I continued, "see the guy she's with? That's Pete and he's a dick."
"And the other girl?" Asked John.
"Emma."
"Well," said Steve standing up, "if you won't go and talk to her then I will." Steve took a large mouthful of his beer and strode confidently over to the table. I turned to look. I couldn't hear what he was saying but at one point he pointed to the table. All three of my coworkers turned to look at me. Both Emma and Angela smiled, Pete did not. If anything he looked pissed off. Angela got up and walked over, with Steve following her.
"Hi." She said to me when she got to the table. "What are you doing here?" I lifted my half drunk Guinness wordlessly. "We're doing the same. Emma has a thing for Pete so I'm playing Cupid tonight."
"Why does she have a thing for Pete?" I asked. I knew Angela felt the same about him as I did.
"No idea. But Emma's a friend so I am trying my best. Who are your friends?" I introduced Angela to the group, leaving Steve until last. "I've met him already," she said looking at him. "pretty forward, aren't you?"
"Sometimes you have to be, Sweetie." Steve said.
Angela looked at him. Her smile did not falter but she was clear when she said "Don't call me that." Steve, looking very put in his place, sat back down. "Want to join us for a drink?" Angela asked, looking back to me. I turned and looked at Pete who was glaring at me.
"I'm ok here for just now, I think."
"Ok, if you change your mind you know where we are."
"Good luck playing Cupid." I said. "But if it were me I'd be trying to make Emma come to her senses."
"The heart wants what the heart wants." Angela said. "Nice to meet you all." She said to the group and left for her table.
"Shit," said John "the things I'd do to her."
"I know, I know." Said Steve. "I'd fuck her until she didn't know who she was."
"Dude. Don't be so crass." I said.
"Looks like you like her too." Steve replied
"Of course I do, she's lovely. But I wouldn't get on the wrong side of her."
"I'd love to get on the wrong side of her, if you know what I mean."
"We always know what you mean." Said Nick.
The night progressed on and the drinks flowed. Steve kept looking at Angela, I kept telling him to stop. He didn't dare talk to her again though, as our table was on the way to the bathroom she walked by us twice smiling at me as she went but Steve kept his head down. Emma walked by and said hello. When Pete walked passed something on the other side of the bar took his interest and he never looked near us.
After two or so hours John and Nick left, leaving Steve and myself. Steve and I chatted before he downed his drink, wished me a happy Christmas and also left. I sat on my own, enjoying my own company until my drink was finished and went to head home as well. On the way out we passed my colleagues.
"Are you leaving?" Angela asked?
"Yeah," I said. "All my friends are away so I figured I would head out too."
"You want to join us?" Angela said. "We're just having one more then we're going as well."
"He said he's got to go." Said Pete, clearly not wanting my company.
"One more won't hurt." I said. I did this mainly to piss Pete off and it had clearly worked, he looked pretty angry. I went back to the bar, got another drink and sat down at the free seat at the circular table between Emma and Angela. Emma was clearly flirting with Pete but he seemed to be having none of it; he seemed more interested in Angela. I couldn't blame him for this, Angela was the hottest person in our office but I was suddenly filled with an overwhelming need to protect her from him. I don't really know why, the guy was an idiot but I wouldn't say he was dangerous. Just pushy and very sure of himself. The arrangement Angela and I had was pretty casual but I still cared for her.
The drinks didn't take that long to consume. We spoke about our plans for the holidays and strange traditions our families have at this time of year. When Emma had taken her final sip Angela spoke.
"So we're all going back to mine?"
"Is he coming?" Pete asked, pointing to me.
"Yes, why?" Angela asked. Pete said nothing. "My house, my rules." This was not the first time I had heard these words come from Angela's mouth. She smiled at me. "You in?"
"Ok." I replied, simply. And with that we all got to our feet and headed out the bar; Emma first followed by Angela then Pete with me at the rear. Just as Angela reached the door of the bar and walked out it Pete turned to me.
"Angela's mine, ok?"
"What do you mean she's yours?"
"I've been working on her for nine months now and tonight's the night. You fuck this up and I'll fuck you up. Got it?"
I sighed and shrugged. "Just whatever, man." And with this Pete turned his back to me and followed Angela out. I left the bar silently laughing to myself. I knew tonight was not going to go the way he wanted.
We started heading towards Angela's apartment. The three of them walked together, I walked just behind, not involved in the group. I wanted to make it look like I had not idea where Angela lived. "Is it far?" I asked.
Angela turned and smiled. "Not too far." She lagged a little bit so she and I were walking together. The other two, who were both deep in conversation about something didn't appear to notice.
"You're Pete's, apparently." I said to her, quietly.
"What do you mean?"
"That's what Pete told me. He's been working on you for months."
"I haven't noticed. He clearly isn't doing a very good job."
"He says tonight's the night?"
"He's so full of bullshit. I already told you I'm trying to set him and Emma up."
"How's that going?"
"Ok, I think. But now that you've told me that he has been talking to me more tonight."
"Funny that."
"Oh shut up." She said smiling. "Left here." She said louder for the benefit of the other two.
After a few more minutes we got to the door that would lead us up to Angela's apartment. I went in last not wanting the others to know I actually knew exactly where I was going. I entered into the familiar apartment and Angela showed us all into the kitchen. She grabbed some glasses and without asking anyone if they wanted a drink poured us all some wine.
We set about our wine while talking to each other but Pete didn't speak to me, which was fine. Angela then suggested we played a game.
"What about strip poker?" Pete suggested in his cocky tone of voice. To my surprise the two females seemed up to this. I was not.
"So," I started slowly, "I don't know how to play poker." I still don't, I've never been much of a gambler.
Pete scoffed. "Call yourself a man? Not knowing how to play poker?" I opened my mouth to say something but Angela cut in front of me.
"What about," she said going to a drawer and pulling something out of it, "strip Uno?" She turned around brandishing a deck of Uno cards.
"I can play that." I said.
"That's settled then." Said Emma.
We started out by agreeing some ground rules. The winner of each round wouldn't have to remove any clothing but instead would decide what other people took off. But you could only be made to take something off if you were left with cards which totalled fifty or more. We would keep on playing until only one person was wearing any clothes.
I dealt the first hand and it was a pretty quick round. Emma won but Angela was counting less than fifty at the end of the round. As such Emma made Pete and I remove our shoes. This led to a debate as to whether or not shoes were one item of clothing or two. Emma made the point that two shoes are one article of clothing as none of us would go out wearing one shoe. Even Pete conceded that she had a point. The same rule was also implemented for socks.
Angela dealt the second hand and also won. She got Emma to take off her shoes, Pete his socks and - Angela being Angela - told me to remove my pants.
"Oh, come on!" I protested, "Pete's just taking his socks off!"
"And you're taking off your pants." Angela said simply.
"You not man enough?" Pete asked. I glared at him, unfastened my belt and button, pulled down my fly and slid the pants off without really standing up; just lifting myself off the chair just enough to get them by my butt.
Round three was Pete's deal and Emma won again.
"The girls are good at this game." Pete said. I had to agree with him, neither he nor I had won a round and were losing clothes fast. Pete was told to remove his suit jacket which he was still wearing from work, I lost my jersey and Angela, having to take something off for the first time, was told to remove her shoes.
The fourth round was dealt by Emma but won by me. Finally a male win! That said Emma scored less than fifty so didn't have to take anything off. Emma was so far the clear winner. After some friendly debate if she was cheating or not I told Pete he was losing his shirt and Angela her socks.
"I'm surprised you are making me take my top off after I made you take your pants off." Angela said.
"I'm far too polite for that."
"I would have made her take her top off." Pete said. I think he was trying to be playful but it just came off as pervy.
Round number five and would you believe it? Emma won after I dealt the hand. Still fully dressed apart from her shoes, Emma told me to take off my tee shirt and Angela and Pete were both to remove their pants. This outcome meant I was in my underwear and socks, Angela had managed to hold onto her top, bra and panties and Pete was down to just his underwear. It seemed that this game was not one of Pete's strengths.
As the wine bottle was empty Angela went to get another from the fridge. I looked at Pete who was openly just staring at Angela's ass as she was walking to get the fresh bottle.
The glasses were topped up before Angela dealt the sixth hand of cards. This round gave Pete his first win. True to his word he told Angela to remove her top, which she did. He made Emma do the same "In the interests of fairness" as he said. Then it was my turn. I knew it was coming. "And you," he said looking at me "can take your underwear off."
"Ok, I'm man enough." I took my underwear off in the same way I had removed my pants earlier. This meant that only Angela could see the goods. I held up my boxers to prove I had taken them off and let go of them letting them fall to the floor.
"Haha, loser!" Said Pete, loudly.
"No?" I questioned.
"You're naked, you lost." Pete replied.
"I'm not naked, I still have my socks on." I said.
"No, you don't." Said Pete.
"Angela," I said turning to her. "back me up here. Do you see me wearing socks?"
She looked under the table. "Yes, I can see your socks." she said. "And that's not the only thing I can see."
"Steady on there, Tiger." I said to her with a wink.
"Whose turn is it to deal?" asked Pete. You could see he was getting mad because I was flirting with Angela.
"It's yours," said Angela looking at Pete. "I dealt the last round."
Pete took the deck, shuffled the cards angrily at dealt us the usual seven cards each. I won this round with Angela scoring under fifty.
"Emma," I said, "looks like now is the time for you to loose your socks." She began taking them off as I turned to Pete. "Now, if I'm correct, the only thing you have left in is your underwear. So time to take them off."
Pete stood up. I couldn't help but notice the slightly smug grin on his face. "At least I have the balls to show everyone what I have." he said, pulling his boxers down. There was a moment of silence around the table while we took it in, which did not take long. Pete was not big. Far from it in fact. His limp little dick must have been about an inch long, maybe an inch and a half if I were to be generous. Emma was simply staring at Pete's disappointment of a member, I didn't really know where to look. The silence was broken by Angela giggling.
"Oh, Sweetie," she said, "no wonder you're always moody."
Pete's grin faltered. "It's bigger than his." He said pointing to me.
"It's not." Angela told him bluntly. "You can't see it, I can." Pete sat down looking red-faced and angry.
"I like it." Said Emma, smiling limply at Pete. "It's functional."
"Functional?" Pete repeated, sounding annoyed.
"It's just that some women don't like a big one." Said Emma, looking like she was trying to backtrack on her previous comment.
"But it is..." Pete started.
"It's not." Said Angela interrupting Pete bluntly. "But it's nice you seem proud of it."
"Angela, come on." I said. I was feeling bad for him, then I remembered it was Pete. "Maybe it's cold in here."
Angela grinned at me, shot a very deliberate glance and my crotch so the other two could see and said "You don't look cold." Pete took a large gulp of wine.
"Now we've all seen Pete's tiny dick shall we carry on with the game?" Asked Angela.
It was my turn to deal. After a long round I won. Everyone was counting over fifty but Pete didn't have anything left to take off. Emma took off her pants and then I was left with Angela. I turned to her.
"It's bra or panties and I don't want to make that decision so I am going to leave it up to you." Angela made her choice wordlessly be reaching round her to her back, unclasping her bra and slipping it off over her arms. She let her large, magnificent breasts rest on the table as she asked whose turn it was to deal, it was Emma's. I looked at Pete who might as well been drooling while starting at Angela's chest.
"They're really nice," said Emma to Angela as she, Emma, started to deal cards. "I always thought you used a push up bra."
Angela grabbed a breast with each hand, squeezed them playful and responded saying "All real, baby." Suddenly, and without any warning Pete stood up.
"Look at the size of it now! Look!" He practically shouted this. Pete's cock was now erect and it really wasn't any more impressive for it. We looked at his tiny, rigid member and we laughed. All of us, including Emma. Pete went bright red. "At least I'm man enough to show you!" He said angrily. "He hasn't." Pointing to me.
"You chose to show us. No one made you" said Angela, still laughing. At this point I decided enough was enough and also stood up.
Emma stopped laughing. "Oh wow." She said. I looked to Angela who was grinning. I looked to Pete.
"So, if this is a dick measuring contest who wins? Does this make me man enough?" I asked. Pete sat down silently, I also sat back down.
"He's larger and thicker than you when he's soft. Imagine it when it's hard." Angela said. "I do like a big dick, they're just more fun. Anyway, whose turn is it to deal?"
It turns out it was Angela's deal. Cards dealt, the game recommenced. However, during this round, every time Angela was able to she was resting her left hand on my dick; she wasn't doing anything to it, but she didn't have to. After only a few times of doing this I was as stiff as a board. I think she thought she was being subtle about it, it turns out she wasn't.
"Angela," Emma said, looking at her, "what are you doing?"
"Trying to make it hard. Just out of interest, you know?"
"Is it working?" Asked an inquisitive sounding Emma. Angela looked at my crotch.
"Seems to be." Was the reply. "I'll just double check. With that she grabbed my erect dick and started - I would go as far to say - aggressively jerking it off. There was a noise like a grunt. We all looked to the source; it was Pete. He had his cards in one hand, the other hand on the table and his eyes were shut. There was another grunt. His body tensed and relaxed. He looked down.
"Oh no." He said. I was confused as to what just happened. Emma was looking at what Pete was looking at, a little stunned. Angela let go of my penis.
"Pete." She said take aback. "Pete, did you just cum?"
Five seconds of silence. Emma broke it.
"He has."
I grinned. Angela started to laugh uproariously. Pete stood up, a little dribble of cum hanging from his tiny dick.
"I'm leaving." He announced as he bent down to get his clothes from the floor and started marched out the room. As went he said "This is a stupid game and" he stopped and looked at Anglea and I and said "You two are dicks." With that he stormed out the apartment, not bothering to pause and put his clothes back on, just using them to cover little Pete. Emma stood up.
"I should go after him." I wondered how she could still be interested in him.
"You sure?" Angela said.
"It's the right thing to do." Emma replied picking up her purse and heading after Pete.
Oh, Emma," I said, getting to my feet and picking up her shoes and socks. "your stuff."
"Thanks" she said, taking them from me. It was at this moment we both remembered that other than my socks I was completely naked. I stood in front of her with my member at its full hard length of ten inches. Emma stared for a second and, not taking her eyes from my crotch, said "Uugghhh gotta go." And followed Pete out the flat, leaving the door open behind her. I went to close the door out into the stairwell pausing only for a second to enjoy the cool breeze against my body. I turned around to see Angela in the doorway.
"Well that was an abrupt ending to the night." I said.
"You aren't kidding."
"Will Emma be ok?"
"I think so. I will text her in a bit, make sure she's ok. I can't believe Pete just ran out of here naked."
"Yeah, can't believe he was man enough to do it."
Angela laughed "Not much of a man. Now, where was I?" She walked towards me, wrapped her hand round my still hard cock and led me dick first into her bedroom. "I don't want this to go to waste."
The next morning found me in Angela's bed, Angela next to me. She gave a sigh of contentment, rolled over and grabbed a handful of Kleenex from the nightstand and used it to wipe my cum off her boobs. She tossed them into the trash can by her bed and picked up her phone.
"Did Emma get back to you?" I asked.
"Year, she's text. I think she might be over her infatuation with Pete."
"How so?"
"She ended up back at his place and they had sex."
"I understand why that maybe put her off."
"She says he lasted about two minutes and spent the rest of the night talking about you."
"What a date for her."
"I asked her what he was saying about you." Angela continued. "He said you're jumped up and the size of a dick doesn't make a man."
"I mean he's right, as much as that pains me to say."
"He's just jealous. Anyway," she said getting to her feet, "want to jump in the shower with me? I want a good wash and you need to clean my tits as you made this mess."
I jumped to my feet and followed her out the room saying "Yes, Mistress." my dick already getting hard as I went.
I didn't know what to expect roughly two weeks later when we were all back at work. It turned out that Pete told anyone that would listen about the card game but altered the story so he came out of it looking good, Angela was a whore and I was a bastard and pathetic excuse of a man. When questioned about it I told people that I wasn't prepared to talk about what I get up to out with work other than Pete had the temper of a child and that he sucked at Uno. When questioned Emma sided with me saying that Pete had a bad temper and was vindictive.
Angela provided more information though saying that Pete was the last person that could complain about anything and that I was "the bigger man, in every way." HR wound up getting involved and because Pete had pissed a good number of people off he ended up getting moved department. Emma, Angela and myself got pulled up too but didn't get into any trouble as Pete was the one talking about our game, not us.
I was told that Pete thought his change of department would be a fresh start, but a leopard can't change its spots and he started having an attitude with everyone there as well. The other thing that he could shake where the rumours of that night and it wasn't long before his new nickname was simply Dickless. He did not last much longer at the company.
When she heard of his departure Angela told me that she didn't intend for all this to happen but was happy with the way it ended.
"Remind me," I told her "to never let you to play Cupid for me."
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