Was it the Accident?

WAS IT THE ACCIDENT?

We met in college on a blind date. We were set up because our mutual friends figured we were both nerds. The first date was nice. She was very shy. I was the first fellow that she ever dated, she never sought out a social circle; I was to become her social circle.

She wasn't a striking beauty. Her raven black hair was pulled back tightly in a bun. Her skin was very fair, but the severe way her hair was pulled back seemed to distort her facial features. And her clothes could only be described as frumpy.

On our first date, we seem to click about talking about her family dog. That opened her up, and soon we were talking about things like books, literature, and movies. She had not seen many movies but there were a few she was deeply fascinated by. When I took her back to her dorm, she let me kiss her good night. It was more a thank you kiss than one of passion. The second date was better. I took her to a movie, one her parents would never approve of, not that it had sex in it or anything, it just turned out her folks were very strict. She was less shy on this date. I took it slowly, and the good night kiss was longer, deeper and suggested a touch of passion. The third date ended on the field in front of campus where we made out for an hour, then made love. She was a virgin. No one had ever paid any attention to her before me because of her shyness and the dowdy way she dressed.

The more we spent together, the more she became interested in dressing stylishly. She let her hair out, and it hung half way down her back. She bought more colorful clothes, in fashionable cuts. The transformation was dramatic. So too, her personality. She began to sparkle. Before long, I could claim she was the most attractive girl in the room. It wasn't like I had discovered a diamond in the rough, I just enjoyed her company. Her makeover was all her doing.

Her parents hated the new way she dressed and wore her hair. They blamed me. They demanded that she end it with me. She refused, and they cut her off financially. I helped her apply for student loans to keep in school. We both took part time jobs and with the added income and with some help from my parents, we moved in together and both finished our education.

We got married shortly after I got my first job. She got a job in hotel management with a high-end outfit. We were never apart through marriage. We were each other's best friend. And she was always the most beautiful woman in the room, wherever she was.

When she became pregnant, she decided to be a stay-at-home mom and raised our two wonderful children, Janet and Stewart. She was a great mother. While nothing is perfect, I always thought our little family was as close to perfect as you could get.

I became fairly successful. While we struggled financially when we were first married, in time, money was less and less a problem.

I was a project manager for a medium sized construction company. Of the several project managers the company had, I tended draw the bigger projects and the bigger bonuses.

Our two kids both did well in school. Janet developed a special bond with her mother. Stewart was a bit more independent, but Kim and Stewart adored each other.

Then it all changed.

Kim and gone to visit her parent's, an hour's drive away. Kim tried to keep a relationship going with her parents, but it was difficult. They criticized everything about her, about her kids and especially about me. More often than not she went to visit them alone to protect the kids. I was simply not allowed in their house. On her return, she was in a horrible accident. She had fallen asleep at the wheel, veered off the Interstate and hit a tree and was critically injured.

She was in a coma for three days. She had suffered from a dozen broken bones, a burst spleen, a severe concussion and a dangerous brain bleed. They actually had to drill into her skull to release the pressure. I was at her bedside nearly the entire time she was in a coma. After she woke, she stayed in intensive care for another four days. She was so weak. She rarely spoke, offering me only a small smile or a slight nod as I sat with her. After two weeks, she was released from the hospital and placed in a rehab facility next to the hospital. Her progress was slow.

Work was as generous as they could be, by which I mean they didn't fire me. They had to divide up my projects to other managers. I burnt through my vacation time and my sick leave, so by the end of the month I needed to go back to work. But by then all my projects were gone, and bonuses from projects made up almost half my pay. On my return, I was given smaller projects as I would be leaving early to spend time with Kim. Smaller projects meant smaller bonuses, so I knew the time would come when I'd need to start counting pennies. And then the medical bills came pouring in. My insurance only picked up 80%, but the 20% I was on the hook for would choke an elephant.

Two months after the accident Kim was released to come home. She was still very weak. Janet withdrew from college to stay home with her mom. I needed to return to work if I wanted to keep the creditors away, so Jan began doing household chores as well as caring for her mother, and I began working harder to try and get ahead of our enormous debt load.

Janet was out of school for six months taking care of her mother. Stewart was now a High School Senior. I was working 14 hours a day, six days a week, and took work home on Sundays. To the extent I was even home, I had sunk into the wallpaper and was nearly invisible.

During this period things happened with Kim. She began perimenopause, something her doctor explained was probably accelerated by the trauma of the car accident. Her mood changed. She became hostile towards me. I was working too much. I wasn't paying her enough attention. We never went out anymore.

I tried to explain that I needed to work more because we needed the extra money to pay down our debts, but that went nowhere. I offered to make Saturday night our date night, but that plan exploded in my face. After making the first two date nights, I had to cancel our third because of work problems. After that, she became ever more hostile to the point that cancelling date nights became more attractive to me. The standard complaint was that I loved my job more than her.

We all noticed the changes. She was moody, fidgety, impulsive and irritable. The doctor suggested that more than menopause, this was symptomatic of Traumatic Brain Injury. There was one positive change: she had become much more aggressive in the bedroom, something I had never seen in our marriage before and this in spite of her hostility.

By that summer, Janet had returned to university, and Stewart graduated from High School. I missed Stewart's graduation. Kim was getting more restless. I suggested she find a job or even volunteer work. She complained that she still tired too quickly for either. What she did instead is bury herself in the Internet. Social media, chat groups, I really didn't know what. That eased the tension between us, but it replaced it with nothingness... a void. I tried to reach across this void, but I didn't try as hard enough.

Meanwhile, the money issues began to improve. That summer, my bonus started rolling in reflecting the extra work I had put in. The bonuses allowed me to start to prepay a part of my medical debt and even set a bit aside to restore our savings.

I was beginning to see a light at the end of the tunnel. Because of my performance with the company, I was given extra duties, more pay, and most importantly, extra staff. I was allowed to select my staff, and I carefully selected the most efficient, which was unusual in a company that generally preferred to promote the most popular with the company leadership. With this extra staff, I was able to reduce my own hours and still beat every company goal set for me.

With my team in place, everything seemed within reach and progress was such that I started to take Saturdays off.

So, I proposed a date night. Kim reluctantly accepted.

The date was a very nice restaurant. After ordering, I explained to Kim how I thought I wanted to adjust my work-life balance enough to start a life that we both might enjoy. I added that her medical debt was about paid off.

At that her back stiffened, and she responded harshly that it sounded like I was blaming her for me spending so much time at work and virtually abandoning her at home.

"Sweetie, I have never blamed you for the debt. The debt was absolutely necessary, and it was not your fault, it just was." Quickly adding, "we are putting an end to all that, and we will have both more time for ourselves and more money to do whatever we want."

In what almost sounded like an apology, she added, "I am so bored, what with the kids off at the university and you gone all the time. I need something to do, I need to be someone. I just feel so left behind. I need a vacation, I need to go somewhere and do something exciting and I need to do that soon."

"Great." I responded, "Where shall we go."

"No!" I don't want to wait for you to be ready, I want to go on a vacation now. You can stick to that job you love so much, let me go on my own adventure."

My mouth fell open and after a moment, I said, "you want to go on a vacation without me?"

"Just a short one, a long weekend maybe."

"Sure. Great. We can do that together."

"Sure we can," she responded sarcastically, "next year, or the year after or never, I know how this will work." Her tone had turned toxic again.

"It sounds like you just don't want me to go." I said quietly.

"I know how it will work. You'll promise me the moon, and then one week after another you'll pop up with on excuse after another."

"No." I said, "this coming weekend. Things have changed. Let's do this. You set it up. If I can't make it, you go by yourself, but I am telling you now, I can do this!

She just stared at me, thinking. After a long pause, "I pick the place we go?"

"Sure."

"After all the boredom I have lived with by you having abandoned me for so long, I need something wild and exciting. Are you ready for that."

"Sweetie, whatever you want." I responded with a smile. "I have never abandoned you."

Without returning the smile, she nodded, and said quietly, "okay, let's see how it goes."

After that, the mood changed. The conversation was convivial, talking about the kids. The evening was reminiscent of pre-accident times.

The next day, she printed off information on a Florida resort and handed it to me.

It was clothing optional.

"Wow. You weren't kidding when you said you wanted something adventurous. Okay."

Before we had kids we had done adventurous things. Once, in Vegas, we went to a strip club. We had made love in some strange places. We had even made love once on deserted beach once (and only once... sand and sex are not a good mix). We had made love a couple of times in the car, and on long distance road trips, we'd 'fiddle around' as we were tooling down the road. Sex was important then. But then came the kids, and sex took second place to sleep. Then came the accident, with its short period of great energy, but which took a second seat to my work.

Now this. Yeah, I was interested.

Monday morning, I was straight to the head-shed to talk to the boss. I said I needed a few days off this week so that the wife and I could have a long weekend. The boss brightened at the request and said "absolutely!" he said. "I was beginning to worry that if you didn't slow down, you'd burn out on me, and you are my biggest money maker."

I was approved for time off from Wednesday through Monday. I at once called Kim and she was ecstatic. She had expected only Friday through Sunday. The extra couple of days made me think I had scored some extra points on my romance rehabilitation chart.

The resort was a five-hour drive from where we lived in Jacksonville. We left early and were at the resort by one. This resort was something. It had five different pools, a very large one, three smaller ones, and a large heated sitting pool they called a conversation pool. There was also a large hot tub and a sauna. There was a dance club, a sports bar and a piano bar. There was a hotel. There were also a couple of hundred units of apartment style condominiums, many of which were available for rent. And then it had probably 50 or more very large, detached privately owned top end houses, all within this one gated community. Many of the condominiums and houses were vacation homes, but many were full-time homes.

And there was more to it than the usual nudist community: they were more than "tolerant" of the folks in the swinger lifestyle community.

After checking-in, we grabbed a quick bite at the Sports Bar. The place was sparsely populated, but the waitress explained that was because it was the middle of the week, the place would be hoping by Thursday. The few folks that we there were very casually dressed, women mostly in bathing suit coverups, but without the bathing suites, which was our first view of the nudity thing.

After a quick meal, we moved into the room. It was modest for the price, but then we weren't planning on spending much time in the room anyway. Besides, it had a mirror on the ceiling over the bed, so it did have some entertainment value.

Later, we took a walk around the campus, still dressed. We ran across a few folks doing the naked thing (we were still textiled). No playboy models as yet, mostly average looking folks with ages closer to 40 than what the website portrayed, but surprisingly, that encouraged us to shed our clothes.

Our walkabout showed us that the hotel was the only modest thing about the place, the Condos were very nice, and the detached homes were luxurious.

After the walk, we went to the pool and shed our clothes for the first time. There were a few more folks in the pool area, and a few younger folks, although the website models still weren't around. But that wasn't our focus then, we were more focused on each other. And comparing Kimberly to even the younger crowd, I was quite proud of my wife.

After hanging by the large pool for an hour, we made our way to the hot tub. Co-located with the hot tub was the conversation pool.

The hot tub was really nice, especially after that drive. The jets hit the spot and heated water allowed every muscle in my body to relax. Another couple joined us, older than us, and we had a nice chat. Frank and Debbie were their names. As we left, they told us that maybe we might hook up later. I just smiled.

Kim wanted to return to the room, I dressed, but she didn't. We walked back to the hotel through the club house where the dance club, piano bar and sports bar were all located. There still weren't many people in the club, but neither was it empty and it seemed that Kim enjoyed her nude walk through the public area.

At the hotel, Kim told me how much turned on she was, that she saw some of the staff checking her out as she walked through the club house and she was turned on by it. I didn't notice but then she was just about the hottest woman in the club, even if there were only maybe 20 or 30 guests about. Anyway, I reaped the benefit of her excitement when we got to the room, as she pulled my clothes off, pushed me to the bed, climbed on top of me and fucked me more vigorously than I had been fucked in years. It didn't take long for her to cum, which set off my own eruption inside of her. She collapsed on top of me and gave me one deep and passionate kiss, before sliding off, resting her head on my shoulder as we both enjoyed a very warm afterglow.

After a good fifteen minutes of a deep cuddle, she moved again, whispered in my ear, "no matter what, always know that I love you more than anything."

She then walked into the bathroom and showered.

After we had both cleaned up, we walked over to the clubhouse. We had reservations at the restaurant there. It was maybe a notch less than fine dining Still, it was nice. It shared its space with the piano bar. Walking in at 6:30, we were seated at once.

From our seat we could watch people filing in to not only the restaurant, but the piano bar and the sports bar, which was in a different part of the clubhouse. Dress was anywhere from causal to very sexy club wear. And entirely naked was also about. My voyeur nature was really being charged.

Kim was still glowing and to my way of thinking it was from my wonderful performance in the room a bit more than an hour ago. She was dressed causal, but she whispered to me that she really wished she had something hot to wear, to compete with the women who were showing up in club wear.

While I was trying hard not to gawk, I was really enjoying the view. Surprisingly, so was Kim, to the point that she was pointing out to me particularly sexy outfits as well as bountiful women walking about with the greater part of their bounty hanging out.

The meal was served and our focus shifted only a little bit to the food.

By the time we had finished the meal and cleared the check, more people were showing up for the dance club, which had the published theme of the night mini-skirts. So many women showing up with their naughty bits hanging out of their barely their skirts and tops.

Kim wanted to head down to the hot tub. That was the initial plan and why we had brought towels with us, but I was a bit surprised, because her interest in the short skirts heading into the dance club was on par with my own. But the hot tub might prove interesting too, and there was time for the dance club later.

There were already a fair number of people gathered at the conversation pool, which was adjacent to the hot tub. And there were three couples already in the hot tub, including Frank and Debbie from the day before. The hot tub was large enough for a dozen people, so we stripped and went on in. Frank greeted us by name. He and Debbie seemed to be holding a command performance, and as he shifted attention to us, the other couples followed and we were fully engaged within a minute of arriving. After talking to me for a full ten minutes, Frank shifted attention to Kim, and then Debbie began to talk with me. Debbie was very attractive. Frank then directed his talk to me and said that as this was our first time here, he ought to explained the unwritten rules of the house.

First, the place was focused on both the nudist community and the swinger community, and so as not to offend the less open nudists, the swinging stuff was mostly subtle. For instance, the sign on the conversation pool indicating that the pool was closed after dark, really meant was that after dark, the conversation pool, and hot tub were for swingers and voyeurs. The dance club allowed no overt sex, although folks were free to be as sexy as they want short of sex, but then there was the playroom, downstairs from the dance club, which was opened later in the evening for swingers and voyeurs. Frank mentioned even if we weren't swinging, it was still worth a visit to see what life on other side was all about.

As the sun was about to set, I was guessing that Kim would be ready to leave, but I waited for her signal that never came. Frank then moved next to me and whispered into my ear, "you know, your wife is a great looking woman. You are a very lucky man."

"Yeah, I think so too" was my tentative response.

"And my girlfriend, Debbie says she really likes you."

"Yeah, she is nice and very nice looking, too." I said, using a noncommittal voice.

"How 'bout we head over to my place, and see where this goes?"

"Sorry, Frank. I'm not there yet. I do appreciate the offer."

"Sure thing, Jack. Maybe next time." Frank said with a friendly smile and returned to his place in the tub.

Kim then leaned into me and asked "what was that all about?"

"I'll tell you later."

With that, the conversation continued in a lighter vein for a few more minutes, then Frank and Debbie excused themselves and got out. A moment later, Kim said "let's head to the club," so we got out, dressed, and headed to the clubhouse. Walking through the clubhouse, the place was a bit more crowded with folks wearing all sorts of sexy outfits, with ever shorter skirts and sheer outfits predominating with plenty of lovely butts to admire. As we walked through, Kim whispered that she had to get something provocative for tomorrow night. I just smiled a very wide smile.

Once back at the hotel room, I was hoping for another passionate romp in the bed. Instead, Kim took at her phone, checked her texts and fired off a quick answer to one.

I asked who she texted and she just told a friend back home, then pressed me for what Frank had said. She looked amused to hear Franks say she was hot, and when I added he told me Debbie liked me, her grin turned mischievous. I quickly added that they were swingers and were trying to engage with us.

"Really?" she asked, clearly amused. Then she asked about my response.

I said we weren't ready yet.

"So, when will be ready?" she asked, teasingly.

"Probably never. I do enjoy watching the women so generously revealing themselves, especially you, but I don't want to share you with anyone. I like the idea of what we share together is ours and only ours, and I don't want that to ever change.

"Oh, don't you ever worry about that. I will always be yours."

With that she began the process of slowly undressing me, a delightful segue from our conversation. Once she had stripped me of my clothes and pulled out my ready-to-fuck cock, I started to undress her, again slowly, more slowly than I could stand. I was even more excited than I was at this stage last night. I could tell that by undressing her slowly, I was enhancing her own excitement. I then very gently laid her on her back and laid a small towel over eyes and told her to pretend it was a blindfold. She giggled.

I then started to rub her naked body all over. I avoided directly touching her naughty bits, gently rubbing all around. Her nipples were soon stiff, and her areola was prickled with goose bumps. I could smell her excitement building up as I rubbed around her well-trimmed pussy, all the while avoiding touching any part of her vulva, even as I came very, very close to it. And the closer I got, I could sense her body squirming ever so slightly.

After twenty minutes of this playful teasing, I allowed my tongue to lightly run across first one nipple, then the other. She squealed at the touch. I continued to focus on the nipples with a bit more pressure, but still teasingly slow. Her response was deep, guttural moan.

Then still slowly, my tongue wandered down the length of her body until it reached her ready pussy. My tongue first explored the outer lips of her slit, and then after a long moment, my tongue parted those lips and lightly penetrated her cleft. At that her moaning grew louder and her hips began to hump.

I avoided touching her erect clitoris for a full minute as her hands reached down and began to push my head into her pussy. At that, I finally allowed the tip of my tongue to put the slightest pressure on her clit.

"Oh, god, that is good!" she called out. "Harder, for fuck's sake, harder."

I added more pressure and she began to cum. The sweet taste of her juices flooded my mouth, her grip on my head tighten, and she called out loudly, "Yes! Yes! Yes!

After what seemed to be a full minute, her body loosened, and I stopped, got up, and wiped my mouth with a washcloth. I then removed her makeshift blindfold and kissed her gently on her mouth. That kiss quickly evolved into something more passionate, revealing a deep hunger that both of us had.

She then pushed me off her, got on her knees and said, "Fuck me, fuck my pussy hard and deep, let me rub my ass against you.

I quickly obliged.

She was so wet. I was in her completely on the first stroke and began thrusting my cock into her with a pulse to match both our wild passions. I swear, she began to cum at almost the first stroke. She met each stroke with a hard push, her ass pounding my body as my cock pounded her ass. As we both drove harder and harder the tone of her voice changed from deep passion to almost animalistic. Then as I came, her voice changed again to a high pitch shrill. By the time we finished we were both breathing hard like we had sprinted a marathon. She collapsed under me, and I was lying over her on her back. We were both drenched in sweat, unable to do anything more than breathe.

After a bit, I rolled off her and we looked at each other, eye to eye, and she said, "damn, that was the best ever. God do I love you. I swear, no matter what, I will always love you."

I just replied, "And I love you, too, Kim, only you, forever and always."

I don't remember much more until I remember waking up, looking down and seeing Kim going to town on my cock. It was up and ready for round two. A memorable fuck indeed, not as wild as the first, but remarkable in its own right.

Afterwards, I remember looking up at the ceiling mirror and seeing our two spent bodies sprawled naked on the bed thinking that it just doesn't get any better than this.

The next morning, I woke up first, made coffee from the in room coffee maker, and watched as Kim slowly woke up to the smell of the freshly brewed coffee. She smiled when I handed her the coffee. Once I finished my cup I went in to shower and came out to find Kim crying.

"What's wrong, dear?"

Apparently embarrassed that she was caught crying, she quickly wiped her tears, looked at me with a sad smile, and said, "last night was wonderful. No matter what happens, please know that I will always love you."

"What's going to happen?" I said with a comforting smile.

"None of us know what the future will bring. So let us just live in the moment. Just know last night was so very special for me."

"Me too."

"Now, take your shower, get dressed and let's head over to the restaurant and get some breakfast and some real coffee, this room coffee is crap."

She gave a short laugh, hugged me, and went to shower.

Breakfast was good; coffee was better. After breakfast we walked to the wellness center. Kim had surprised me by scheduling a couple's massage. I had never had a massage and was both curious and nervous. It was a legitimate massage, in spite of the very sexual nature of the place. Both of us were naked, which was where my nervousness came in, but because of the time we had already spent publicly naked at the pool, I suppose I wasn't nearly as nervous as I might have been. Kim wasn't nervous at all.

We were both in the same room. Kim got a male masseuse, and I got a female. Both were middle aged and were fairly nice looking and were fully dressed. The massage lasted almost an hour, and wow, what a release. It did feel slightly sexy, but it was mostly an effort at busting up stress and tension.

After the wellness visit, we returned to the clubhouse to grab a quick lunch. As we entered, Kim said she was going to meet up with Debbie at the little store that carried sexy outfits for the club.

"When did you arrange that?" I asked.

"In the hot tub when you were talking to Frank."

So as Kim left, I went up to the sports bar to nurse a beer and wait for her to join me. I had to wait an hour.

When she returned, Debbie was with her.

Debbie greeted me saying, "glad you guys decided to come clubbing tonight. You will really enjoy this. And the outfit that Kim picked out is awesome."

I didn't know we were going clubbing, it hadn't been discussed, but the blank look on my face didn't slow Debbie down one bit.

"Save a few dances for me, lover," Debbie said with a wink.

As they walked away, I turned to Kim who had just sat down, and asked, "What's going on?

"What? Oh, that? Nothing. Just innocent flirting, is all."

"Maybe not so innocent. Look, hon, I like this place. I like looking at you naked. I even like checking out the other women. But let's not get too far ahead of ourselves, okay.

"Yeah, sure. Anyway, you are going to like the outfit I got for tonight. It's spectacular."

I felt that she was dismissing my concerns rather than addressing them, and I said so.

"Oh, dear, don't worry," she responded. "I love you and I always will. Please, just relax and enjoy yourself. Don't worry."

While that sounded a little better, it also was a bit evasive, so I worded my next bit so that there was no wiggle room.

She quickly added. "My love, there is nothing to be afraid of. I love you and only you. We are just having a little adventure."

She then leaned over and gave me a very wet kiss.

Later, after a bite of lunch, we went back to our room and changed and went back to the pool. This time we went to the conversation pool, a long pool with seating arranged where folks sat in a gently heated water for conducive to conversation. We had been told that during the day it was for the nudist, but at night it was for the swingers, and as this was early afternoon, things were tame.

It was quite relaxing. As we sat there watching folks coming in and out, Kim started a conversation just with me. She waxed nostalgic.

"You know, we have had a good life. You have been a good husband and a good father. What we built together, no matter what, we should always be proud of." At that she grabbed my hand and held it lovingly.

"Yes," I agreed, "we have two lovely children, both of whom have the advantages we have given them to make successful lives for themselves. You have been a wonderful mother, and you should claim full credit for the wonderful children you have raised. And of course, you have been a wonderful wife."

Then she added, "you know, I am a little sad that for the most part our job is done. But I am happy that if we were to disappear tomorrow, the kids would be all right, we have equipped them to make their way in the world."

"Yeah, of course your right. Now we get to look forward to grandchildren." I said with a smile.

At that she squeezed my hand and looked away and said, "yes, maybe so."

Shortly after that, we got out, dried ourselves and walked over to the little outside bar they had amongst the pools and got refreshments. The reminiscence phase ended, and Kim asked that we return to our room, which we did. I was hoping for a little recreational excitement, but Kim just wanted a nap, telling me she wanted to save all the excitement for that night.

In fact, between the bright sun on a mild Florida November day and the heated pool, I too had acquired enough for a deep nap. We both woke later than expected and rushed to get ready for our dinner reservation at the resort's restaurant.

Kim put on her outfit to go out that she had bought with Debbie's help. To quote Kipling in a different context, there "was nothing much before, and rather less than half of that behind."

I was impressed. In spite of being outside with her for half the day naked, when she put on that bit of clothing, the tease aroused all of my interest. There was nothing underneath, her bottom of her ass actually appeared just below the hemline, the top was just two narrow widths of cloths climbing to her neck, barely covering her nipples, which you could just make out through the sheerness of the cloth. This would be some delicious candy I would very much her enjoy hanging on to my arm at whatever the evening would bring.

Arriving at the clubhouse, Kim definitely stood out, but not so much because of her outfit. There were plenty of women dressed in clothes as scanty and revealing as Kim's. No, she stood out simply because she was so good looking. It helped that the average age here was probably 50, but she still was the outstanding looker.

After the meal we planned to go to the club and even try some dancing. I was not a good dancer, but it was important to Kim, and I was ready to make a fool of myself to please her. Before walking into the club, we walked out onto the very large balcony that overlooked the several pools that the resort had. We could hear music coming from the little outside band they had between the pools, and we could see a fairly active knot of people there having a good time. It was then that Kim turned to me and said, "Jack, you have been so very good to me. I do love you so much, no matter what you might ever think, know that I will always love you." With that she gave me a very deep and passionate kiss.

"Now, let's go have some fun" and with that she led me into the club where the DJ was going at it and a few folks were already on the dance floor.

We ordered drinks and people watched for the first 15 minutes. The crowd was a bit younger than the mostly nudist crowd at the pool that afternoon. Still, plenty of older and ordinary folks. Most of the women were dressed very sexy, semi-naked, with some breasts freely out and bouncing about. I drank it all in.

Then Debbie came up to our booth, kissed Kim on the cheek and talked into her ear. The music was so loud I couldn't make out what was said, but they went back and forth in conversation for a couple of minutes. Then Debbie came over to me and spoke into my ear and said, "I'm going to join you guys for a bit. But first, you two go dance, I'll watch your drinks, okay, lover" and with that she kissed my cheek.

As expected, my dancing was nothing to write home about, but I was enjoying watching my beautiful wife in a light I had never seen her before, she was so exotic, so sexy. And she danced as if she knew it. After two dances, she took me by the hand and walked me to our booth. Debbie was there waiting, and as we got closer, Debbie and Kim both broke into the biggest smiles. As we sat down, me next to Kim and Kim next to Debbie, they again started talking close to each other's ears, not to keep me from hearing, but because the music was so loud that was the only way they could hear each other.

Then Frank, the fellow with Debbie when we first met in the hot tub, walked up. He put his hand on my shoulder, leaned forward and spoke into my ear. "Good to see you, Jack, and I am so glad we ran into you again here. Have you been having a great time?"

"Yeah, sure" was my short, quick answer.

"Damn, Kim looks hot, you are one lucky bastard, Jack. Hey, do you mind if I asked her for a dance?"

"Go ahead," I said.

He leaned over and spoke to Kim, then the two of them headed to the dance floor. Debbie scooted over and spoke to me.

"Looks like I have you all to myself, lover."

I smiled.

"How 'bout a dance?"

"I'm not that good."

"No worries, let's go."

So out we went.

The first dance was another example of me trying to prove I had the beat, when I did not. Debbie danced well. Her skimpy outfit showing more than it hid.

But the next dance was slow, and Kim very sensually clung to me, rubbing her parts against mine. Yes, it resulted in a bit of a raise.

Then she spoke into my ear. "You have to come down to the playroom in a little bit. Frank and I and another fella are putting on a show. A little spit roasting for everyone's enjoyment. It will mean a lot if you were there.

It was at that point I saw Kim. She slow dancing in front of Frank her back against him, rubbing her ass on Frank while frank rubbed his crouch against her. His hands had slipped behind the thin fabric hiding her nipples and he was rubbing my wife's tits. Kim saw me staring and said, "Frank is always too handsy. Let's rescue your wife," and with that she walked up to Frank, cut in and freed Kim. I followed, taking Kim by the hand and walking her out onto the porch.

"What the hell was that?" I asked Kim.

"I am sorry, Jack. It's just been such an exciting evening, I just got carried away. Please, Jack, don't be too upset."

I just shook my head and said nothing. I started to turn around and walk away.

"No, Jack, don't leave. Let's talk."

We walked over to a part of the large balcony area where there were hardly any people.

"Look, it was ten seconds, probably less. It happened. I was in the moment. I let it happen. Let's not kill the night over this thing. Let's go back in and dance, just you and me. Please."

"I don't understand. This is not you. What has happened?"

"Yeah, okay. Hear me out on this. It's still me. But there is something... a sense of urgency... that I never had before. You saved me. You really did. My parents had me wrapped in a cocoon so tightly that there was no room for me. You found me and helped me break out of that cocoon. You, more than anyone else, more even than myself, freed me. Until there was you, I was whatever my parents demanded of me. They had squeezed what self I had out of me, until you freed me. I was just learning how to be me, when we married, and the kids came along.

"I love our kids. They are the best of both of us. They are the greatest thing I have ever done.

"But you see, for part of my life who I was controlled by my parents. For part of my life I was controlled by our children, and for that sliver of time when it was just you and me, I was too timid to venture far from your loving presence.

"I never had a social life. Not in high school or even in college until I met you, and even then, you were my social life. I never got, I don't know, a chance to be a bit wild.

"Then last year I almost died. I know now how precious life is, how little time we have left. I have done all the responsible things expected of me. I have never had the adventure so many of my friends always talked about. That was what this weekend is about. That is what happened in that moment on the dance floor.

"This might be our last weekend here together. I don't want it to end just yet. Let's go back. Let's you and me be wild together, just this once. Please, Jack, this is very important to me.

I looked into her eyes for a moment. I could tell my own eyes were watering. "Okay." I said. "So long as I am you partner in this adventure."

Kimberly smiled, hugged me, and led me by the hand back into the club.

I saw that our booth had been taken, so I went up to the bar, ordered both of us another drink. Kim stayed next to me. I then just closed out our tab.

We found another booth. We sat next to each other, and Kim just snuggled me for a moment while we watched the people. It was an endless parade of folks in all sizes and shapes, dressed in a wide assortment of sexy clothes, as if each was trying to outdo the other. And as wide a variety of clothes as there was, the shapes, sizes, and ages of the folk was equally varied.

A slow song came up. Kim grabbed me and pulled me to the space in front of our booth... not the dance floor, and began a very slow and sensual dance. She held me tight and after a moment, I held her tight back. When we finished, I had gotten past the bit where she had let Frank grope her breasts.

She then led me out of the club. Back on the balcony, where the noise was not so loud, holding both my hands and looking me in the eyes, she said, "Jack, I need one more thing. I know I have crossed a line that I never should have, but this will be the last thing I ask of you here. It is important. It is part of my missed adolescence, part of missed rebellious years. But I have given you 24 years of love, devotion, I ask this now in balance.

"I want to walk into the playroom with you. The idea of an actual orgy going on in that room has me curious. I don't need to participate in the orgy, I just want to watch. I'm just a bit of a voyeur, just as we both use to get excited watching porn together before the kids. Please, please, let us go in there together. It will be the last thing we do here. I won't ask for another thing. Please."

It struck me that what she was asking was something that had a very high risk of not ending well. But I also knew that saying no could have a long-term negative consequence.

"Sure." I answered. "But please, be careful. Please, stay in control of yourself, okay?

"Okay, my love."

We then walked downstairs to the adult playroom.

Entering the playroom, we were hit with the color scheme of red and black. The first room had lockers and towels for changing. First rule: everyone had to be naked. We obliged. The room also had some tables and chairs for a bit of socializing.

We anxiously walked into the second room. In it was a round bed and surrounded by benches against the wall. Clearly, it was designed for anyone who wished to perform and for those wishing to watch the performance. There sitting on the bed was Frank and Debbie and a third fellow. They were talking quietly and stroking each other slowly. I was anxious to see Frank again, but Kim didn't dawdle, she quickly walked us into the next room.

This room had an X shaped cross to which a woman was strapped to, and another couple slowly were rubbing her body. To the side of the cross were whips of various kinds. In the corner of the room was another round bed for whatever anyone was up to.

The next area was a hallway, first with a shower area, but then four or five smaller rooms containing one or two beds each and a curtain at the doorway. Instructions posted at the doorway saying, "curtain closed, do not enter; curtain half open, feel free to watch; curtain open, feel free to enter."

One of the rooms was already occupied, with the curtain half open. There was already a couple standing outside staring in with the couple inside going at it. We peeked in also. The couple were just a little younger than us, average looking and really going at it. Kim turned to me and with a big smile said, "hmm, that looks interesting." I smiled back.

We wandered to the next room. A series of beds against one wall and a long row of benches on the other so that voyeurs and exhibitionists could gather and enjoy each other. While there were six beds, there was only one couple putting on a show, and three couples enjoying it. We sat down and watched for a few minutes. It wasn't as well done as porn, but that it wasn't seem to add to the excitement. Mind you, the couple were not exceptionally good looking, but their enthusiasm made up for any other shortcomings.

After no more than three or four minutes, Kim took me by the hand and led me to the very first room where Frank, Debbie and a third friend had been sitting. By now the show had started. Debbie was being fucked from behind while Frank's cock was being vigourosly sucked by Debbie. The room was almost full with admirers. I understood why: Debbie was good-looking, and Frank was enormous. Kim smiled and whispered to me that had I played my cards right, I might could have been behind Debbie fucking her. At first, I thought she was teasing me, but as I looked at her, I got a deep sense that her teasing tone was only a cover, that she wanted me to know that she was okay with me fucking Debbie.

We watched until Debbie had to allow Frank's throbbing cock slip from her mouth because of the powerful orgasm had taken complete control of her senses. She called out loudly, "oh, fuck me, Sam!" as she hit her climax and then collapsed on the bed.

I have to admit the whole session was a turn on, and Debbie's suggestion that I might have been the one fucking her from behind was now living in my head.

"That was hot, huh Jack?" asked Kim. She then grabbed my hand and lead me back into the labyrinth of sex rooms. "I am so hot, I need to have sex, and now." She walked back to one of the rooms with a bed in it, closed the curtain halfway, and walked me to the bed. I was aware of what was happening and didn't care. She laid me down on the bed, got on her knees between my legs at the far end of the bed, and opened up her little bag and pulled out a curious little contraption.

It was U-shaped, but the two legs were different. One arm was in the shape of a dildo, the other arm was flatter. She inserted the phallus shaped part into her pussy with the flat end over her clit. There was pressure enough between the two arms that it worked as a clamp, holding the device firmly in place.

Penetration by the dildo end was done easily. Walking around naked watching others fuck was foreplay enough for Kim.

She then reached into her bag and pulled out a much smaller device... a remote control for the gadget she was now wearing in her vulva. She switched it on. A gentle humming was heard as the flat part against her clit began to vibrate, and the dildo began not only vibrate, but slowly thrust itself in and out of her pussy.

We had never used toys as part of our sex play before. I was both fascinated and excited.

With the device firmly clamped onto her, she stretched out, staying on her knees but lying on top of my legs with her head falling to my now fully engorged cock. She gulped my cock into her mouth and began sucking it. The feeling was instantly delicious. I closed me eyes and enjoyed the powerful feeling of my dick in her warm, wet mouth.

When I opened my eyes after about a half of minute, I saw that her ass was in the air, supported by her knees and that the device was apparently fully visible and functioning to the delight of several gawkers who have gathered at the half-opened curtain. At first, it was exciting that we were putting on a bit of a show. But then I spotted Frank and Debbie as part of the audience and Frank began to move the curtain from half closed to 2/3ds open.

The presence of the man who had publicly molested my wife on the dance floor in my presence faded to the background as my wife's oral performance on me again took center stage. And just as my cock began to electrify my whole body, she stopped and began to moan loudly as her device continued to fuck her pussy into an orgasm. Clearly, the audience enjoyed her orgasm while watching the device continue to thrust into her.

After another half minute had passed following her orgasm, she returned to my cock and began to give me a vigorous hand job. I was too far gone to protest a slower rate to draw out my delight, and I began to cum. The novelty of the toy, the audience, something, made me ejaculate harder and fuller than I had in decades, maybe even harder than ever. Kim made sure that her face caught most of my cum. She even began rub my cock into her face such that the last bit of cum covered her entire face. She had never done that before.

Kim then got up on her knees, wiped the spunk off her face, then lied down next to me on my arm. Someone then closed the curtain for us.

After a few moments, she whispered to me, "Jack, I have something very important to tell you. I hope you will accept it. I want you to accept it, but it is going to happen whether you accept it or not."

This didn't sound good at all. "What is it you have to tell me?

"I have accepted a job with Frank Milano."

"Frank? The guy in the hot tub? The guy I was dancing with? The guy you let play with your tits? The guy we just met this weekend? You're kidding? When did you work this out, during a dance?"

"No. I have been communicating with Frank for some months now. This weekend was a chance for me to introduce you to Frank's lifestyle. I was hoping you might be little bit more tolerant of it. I don't think that worked the way I hoped."

"So, this weekend was a setup?"

"Yes, I'm sorry I deceived you, Jack, but I didn't think you'd accept this without understanding what it was."

"What it was?"

"Umm, well all of this."

"Maybe it is better you start over. What job?"

"Frank is an investor. He is very rich, and he and other rich men get together and invest in different kinds of projects. Frank is the lead in this group. He finds a project that he intends to support and then he meets with others and tries to get them to join him in the projects."

"Yeah, okay, what does that have to do with you."

"He wants to hire me to be a hostess to these different meetings. These meetings tend to be long, extremely detailed and tend to be exhausting. These people expect minimal distractions during their meetings a certain level of... atmosphere for these meetings and the hostess assure that they are comfortable during these meetings."

"Why you, though. You're a forty-five year old mother of two and you haven't worked in the hospitality industry in years."

"Frank tells me I'd be perfect for what he has in mind."

"And how does he know that? How does he know you at all?

Kim sighed, closed her eyes for second as if concentrating on what to say next, then slowly started. "I saw a posting on the Internet, and a social media platform, it was an inquiry for attractive, middle aged women interested in adventure in an unconventional position with good pay. It talked about liberal, open-minded ladies with a good education. I responded to the posting, and began an in-depth correspondence with Debbie, it turned out. After a couple of weeks of such correspondence, I was selected for an interview. Debbie and Frank flew to Jacksonville where we met for the first time.

"Jack, you have been working so hard, and I have been alone now most days and often when you get home, I am either already asleep, or you are too tired to even talk to me. I was very, very restless.

"Anyway, as part of this interview, Frank and Debbie and I had sex. I was..."

"You have already fucked Frank!"

Kim sighed again. "Yes, my love. It is only sex. I still love you and only you."

"Sex was part of the interview? Are you going to be a prostitute?"

"No. As hostess I might have sex with the clients, but I don't have to. Besides, Jack, the money is good."

"A well paid whore, but still a whore."

"No, I won't be having sex for money. I will be paid simply to make sure that the other investors are comfortable. I get to decide what it takes to make them comfortable. And if I decide it will be a little romancing, then we might have sex."

"And on top of your clients, you'll be fucking the asshole, Frank?"

"Yes, as well as Frank. You see, Frank is a polyamorists. He has a circle and within that circle, the individuals are free to have sex with each other. Frank has invited me into his circle. It doesn't mean I love him, nor does it mean he loves me, it just means that we each are free to have sex with each other."

"I see. And how many men are in this circle?"

"Just Frank. He is the only male. All the rest are women. Five women in fact, and all of them are hostess also."

"So, a hareem."

"Jack, if you can accept this, we can still married. I can still come home to you when the job permits. I expect we will be able to make love together even more than we have lately. You can take it easy now, I can contribute to our household budget and payoff that debt of ours... of mine."

"That debt has been finally and fully paid off. Besides, I would never sell my wife to support my family."

We were both then quiet for a moment.

"Jack, I am taking the job."

"Do me one favor. Stick around for a bit. Frank is going to return. The three of us can have sex together. We can try that spit roasting thing he was doing earlier. You can chose your position. Once you realize its just sex, maybe you can accept what I am going to be doing. Please, Jack. Let's see if it works."

"No." There was sadness in my voice.

I got up. I stared at her for a moment. She was lying there, naked and as beautiful as ever. I shook my head, and finally said, "what about our children?"

"The kids will be okay. We did a good job with them."

"What will I tell them?"

There was no answer. I walked out of the room. Frank and Debbie were in the hall, obviously waiting.

"She's all yours, asshole."

Frank smiled, parted the curtain and walked in. Debbie followed me quietly.

I then dressed, walked out of the playroom area and having no idea what to do or where to go, I sat down on the floor outside the playroom. Momentarily, my mind just shut down. I had no recollection of my thoughts until Debbie walked up. She sat down next to me.

"Can we talk?" she asked.

"Oh, please, don't ask me to go in there. I hurt enough already.

"No, nothing like that. I just want to say that this weekend was all screwed up, and I am sorry that I was a part of it."

"What exactly was the point of all of this?"

"This may sound weird, but it is because Kim loves you and wanted to keep you in her life, while she goes on what she calls her adventure."

"Weird doesn't quite capture it."

"I know."

For a moment we both just sat there on the floor silently.

"Jack, Kim is going to leave with Frank in a few minutes." She paused to see my reaction. I had no reaction, the information was nothing I could process.

Debbie continued, "You can't wait here. You can't cause a scene. This place is full of security, and you don't want to tangle with them."

Again, no visible reaction.

"If you don't leave now, Frank will have security remove you. So, let me walk you to your room at the hotel."

I had no will power, so I nodded. Debbie took me by the arm and walked with me, out of the clubhouse and down the hundred or so yards to the hotel. I got out my key, and she entered with me. I sat on the bed.

On entering the room, I could tell that Kim's stuff had already been removed. Debbie quickly explained that while we were at the club, Frank had someone remove it all.

"She was certain that she was not coming back?"

"Yes."

"Can you tell me what has happened?"

Debbie paused for a second and answered slowly. "Frank, Kim and I have been having a series of sessions for three or four months now. Frank describes it as his polyamorous circle and has invited Kim to join, and she has agreed. It is a hierarchical circle, with Frank the center and leader. I am in the circle, too as are four other women. We all live with Frank. The women are allowed to date outside of the circle, but only with Frank's permission and only with men approved by Frank which is to say Frank's client's. Had you accepted Frank's offer, you would have been the only man not a client to be allowed visitation with one of Frank's girls.

"How long has she been planning this?"

"Her joining us was agreed to a month ago."

The explanation was bullshit. I knew what polyamorous meant, but this wasn't open, free love that its advocates talk about. Frank ran a whore house as bribes for his investors.

"One thing I don't get. I would figure these rich bastards would want young twenty-something babes. Kimberly is forty-five. She is good looking, of course, but still..."

"Well, you're mostly right. You'd be surprised, some of these rich bastards like to talk before a good fuck. The girl friend experience isn't the same between a twenty-two year old and a sixty-year-old. Kim can be personable and she is educated. She will still be passed over a lot for the younger girls, but there is something else. We have three very regular clients who are into Dominatrix. Her beautiful, long black hair is perfect for that role.

"She doesn't know anything about stuff like that... or does she?"

"She doesn't but we know is very trainable. She will be my apprentice for a year, then I will retire and she will take over and I'll move over to manage the overall conferences. And while it won't be a big part of her dance card, for the few that like that sort of thing, it is a big deal."

"When can I speak to Kim?" I asked.

"I don't know. That will be up to Kim and Frank. She might not ever speak to you, again"

"What about our kids?"

"I don't know about that either." Then after a pause. "Look, I have talked a lot with Kim. She laid out her situation very plainly; she loves you. You are a good man, a good provider, a good father. But for reasons not your fault, she needs more, more excitement in her life. Frank can give her that. Her children are about to embark on their own lives now. They don't need her. Now is the time for her to live her own life."

"I never thought she found me dull."

"She never said that."

"Yeah, but that is what I am hearing."

After a long pause. "Will you do me a small favor and pass along a message to my wife? Tell her that she needs to keep a relationship with our kids. No matter what I did to deserve this, the kids are innocent and they need her."

Debbie told me something of herself. "I didn't come to Frank like Kim did from a loving family situation. None of us girls did. My husband was abusive, powerful, and divorced me where he had all the money and made sure he had custody of the kids. I was broken, alone and desperate. Frank gave me shelter, security, money and a form of love. Sure, not the love you knew, but a reasonable imitation of it. And the other women in my circle serve as a substitute for my family. Every other woman in our circle came from something similar. Kim's situation is different. She says she still loves you very much and loves her children too. She says she just needs this, this adventure, more than anything."

Debbie then took a small sheet of stationery from the hotel and wrote her name on it. Just her first name. She wrote an email address. "Jack, if you ever need anything, email me. I promise I will call you when I can."

Then she reached out, kissed me on my forehead, and told me she was so sorry, and then left, leaving me alone in an empty hotel room.

I knew I wouldn't sleep, so I packed the car and left for home. I knew not to wait for Kim to come to her senses and return to me. And even if she did return, it was already too late.

Coffee kept me awake, but the five-hour drive passed with barely a memory of it. My heart and soul were empty.

Once home, I fell asleep on my couch only to wake up three hours later thinking I had had a bad dream, only to realize after a moment that it was real, life as I knew it was over.

I called the kids and told them that their mom had left me. They told me that their mom had called earlier and said that we had grown apart and that she had found a job involving travel and she would be gone a lot.

I told them what I knew, except for the bit about the Dominatrix. There were tears.

The next day I went into the office and spent a good deal of time with Mr. Adams, the owner of the company. He was sympathetic and told me to take whatever time I needed. I met with my team, reviewed the matters needing to be dealt with and told them only I was taking time off to deal with a family matter.

The rest of the week was a blur. I found work a distraction. At home there were too many reminders of a life lost. The kids called every night to check on me and asked me more questions about their mom. I answered what I could.

Later in the week I met with an attorney suggested to me by Mr. Adams and began the process for divorce.

Then Friday evening both kids took the two-hour drive from university to come home and be with me. They also brought news.

Kim had called both of them the night before. She called from Frankfurt, Germany, and told them more about her new job. She would be travelling the world as hostess to people with money looking to invest in American real estate developments. She said our marriage was already dead before she received the job offer.

When asked directly if she was having an affair with her boss, Kim was defensive but eventually answered that our marriage was already dead by the time she started "dating" her boss.

They asked then why she took me on a romantic weekend get-a-way just to dump me?

She answered that it was complicated, that she never wanted to hurt their father, that she still loved their father, but she needed more than being married to a man whose mistress was his work.

They asked her if she was paid to have sex with other men. She flat out denied it.

The weekend with the kids was good therapy. I felt less alone. They expressed deep shock at what their mother had done "to our family" and talked about going no contact with her. I asked them not to. No matter what, she was always a good mother to them. That she turned out to be a shitty wife was not something on their plate. I told them that the fact is I was so busy trying to provide for everyone, that maybe I wasn't such a great husband. They refused to accept that, but at least they agreed not to go no contact on her "yet."

The rest of the weekend was spent mostly together, going out for meals, talking about university, about their future, and about mine.

That Monday, I was first to work and the last to leave. I buried myself in things that were not about my miserable self. Whether it was therapy or burying trauma, it just worked for me.

Later that week, I met again with the lawyer. He put in front of me a proposed settlement agreement which pretty much divided our assets in half, to include selling our home and dividing the proceeds equally. It left out alimony, with the lawyer remarking, "if they want alimony, they need to send us the documents showing an entitlement, which is to say her current pay and financial situation." I agreed. It was all mailed to the attorney Debbie told me to send it to. I also enclosed a private letter to Kim asking that she contact me.

The following week, Kim's attorney responded and by filing an answer with the court waiving any property or alimony claims and including a quit claim deed from Kim to the marital home. Both my lawyer and I were surprised. The response included a note saying that Kim's "employer" was taking care of all of Kim's financial needs. It also said that my letter to Kim was refused, saying Kim didn't want it and hadn't read it.

She wanted no contact.

The rest of the week I plunged into my work. The kids were no longer calling every night. I guess they figured I was out of the crisis. I was, so long as I worked to exhaustion so that I could find sleep when home.

Two months later we were divorced.

In the meantime, Kim's almost weekly calls to our kids began to slack off. She had called from Frankfurt, Amsterdam, London, Singapore, San Francisco and New York. But then there was a full two weeks of silence. Then a call just after the divorce from Tampa. Each call, Kim would ask about their studies and who they were dating, and how I was doing. The kids always said that Dad is hurting, that I was trying to hide the hurt from them, but they could tell. When she called from Tampa, they asked if she could visit, or if they could visit her, and she told them that "soon, maybe, but right now I'm too busy." They asked if they could have her number. She said because she was afraid they'd give me her number and that she couldn't talk to me yet. Eventually, my kids quit asking.

After about six months, the calls were only once a month.

After a year, they only got a phone call for their birthdays and on Christmas. After that, nothing.

When our daughter graduated, I sent a graduation announcement via her divorce lawyer. She got an unsigned card with a money order for a $1000 in it. Nothing else.

Later

It had been five years since she left me, and three years since we had heard anything from her except for the money order. Our daughter was getting married to a sweet fellow and she wanted a perfect wedding, which didn't mean a big wedding, perfect to my daughter meant only that her mother would there so that her family would be complete again. Her fiancé knew the circumstances, as did his family, and was fully supportive, so with that I wrote to her lawyer again asking him to send the invite to her wedding. I also emailed Debbie, asking her to tell Kim that her attendance at the wedding would mean a lot to her daughter, as she wants both her parents there.

Debbie answered back that she had forwarded our email to Kim, but that she was no longer working with Frank anymore, that Frank had sold her "Hostess Contract" to Samuel J. Kleinschwanz. Mr. Kleinschwanz was among the richest men in the state, owning everything from television stations, new car dealerships and beachside luxury hotels. Kleinschwanz was a long-time investor in Frank's projects, and recently, he had been elected governor of the state.

"He bought her contract?" I asked incredulously. "God, why does this sound so much like trafficking? Do you know how much?"

"A quarter of a million."

"Shit, all she cost me was my heart."

Telling the kids about their mother's relationship with the governor sent them to the Internet and within an hour had collected a couple of dozens photographs in the media of her. She was an alias, Kimberly Janice, which was from her first and middle name, omitting both her married name and her maiden name. The information on her was sparse, describing her as either the governor's date, his girlfriend and a recent bit described her as the governor's girlfriend who played hostess at the governor's mansion.

All the pictures showed her dressed up in high fashion and richly coiffed. She was pure arm candy, flawless in every detail, looking decades younger than her 50 years.

As to the invites to the wedding... Kim never responded.

The Wedding.

The wedding was held on the beach behind a beachfront hotel. It was a relatively small thing, only about forty people total. The reception was going to be in the hotel ballroom. By that afternoon, the hotel had set up everything on the beach for the ceremony with chairs for the guests, a platform for the minister and an archway for the wedding couple.

I was already checked into the hotel as was my daughter and her party, the groom, his friends and family. Early that morning I checked with the hotel event manager, and she informed me that she wished I had told her the governor was attending.

"What? He is? That's news to me."

"We got a call from his security team saying they would here this morning to check on security arrangements."

"Damn. He wasn't invited. My ex-wife has been dating the governor recently, but honestly, none of us have heard from her in years, and she never RSVP. Well, just add whatever inconvenience this causes to the bill. I am sorry, this was totally unexpected."

I told my daughter what had happened, and she was not happy. This was not her idea of an intimate wedding, not with a stranger present who could steal the show.

Later a news crews showed up from the local station owned by the governor.

The news people set up on the beach, and when we protested, it was pointed out that the beach was public access, and no one could stop them. The producer apologized, he sympathized with our position, but explained that if he didn't cover this event, he'd be fired. He then promised me to be as unintrusive as possible.

So, on we went. It was to be a sunset ceremony. As the time approached to begin, and ass my daughter and I were preparing to begin the procession with the very young flower girl and ring bearer there was suddenly activity from behind us. A number of people walked in, passed us, and continued toward the wedding area. Then the governor and finally Kimberly, followed by one of the security people. The Governor stopped only long enough to say congratulations to my daughter then to me, and he walked by. Kimberly ignored me, looked at our daughter, gave her a hug and a kiss on the cheek saying, "you look beautiful" then scurried to catch up with the Governor.

After that, I looked at Janet and I said, "Wow. What a reunion, huh?

"What the fuck, Dad, what was that."

"I'm thinking they are on a timetable, and we've just been squeezed in. Guess we shouldn't have expected much more."

The governor and Kim did a grab and grin with people already gathering around the seats for the ceremony. Then the governor and his entourage took their seats on the bride's side front row, taking the seat reserved for me as the father of the bride.

With the governor seated, all the remaining guests took their seats, and after a moment, the prerecorded wedding march began and I escorted my daughter down the aisle to the podium where her fiancé was already standing. With the governor and Kimberly and his security team having taken the entire first row of seats on the bride's side, there was nowhere for me to sit.

After presenting my daughter to her fiancé, I kissed her, turned and faced the row. I walked over to the fellow sitting next to the governor, and said quietly, "hey man, that's my seat, scoot."

He sat there stiffly, gave a small shake of his head, and then continued to stare ahead. All eyes, to include the wedding party, were on us.

The governor looked at me and spoke loud enough to be heard by most of the folks there, "go find somewhere else to sit. I need my security detail."

I glanced over at Kim. She was just staring straight ahead. This drama apparently didn't involve her at all.

The small kerfuffle became the center of attention for the five seconds that it lasted, which I cut short by simply walking away. I took my place at the back of the gathering, standing next to our paid videographer who was recording everything.

The ceremony itself was beautiful, in spite of that short bit of seating confusion.

Afterwards, we all went into the hotel ballroom where the reception was to be held. I kissed my daughter on entering the ball room and started to shake my son-in-law's hand to welcome him into the family, when the governor cut in, put his arm around the groom and walked him away from me. Kim was a few feet behind him, avoiding eye contact with me.

The governor walked the groom over to my daughter, interrupted her while she was greeting guests, grabbed her hand and pulled her over to the DJ, picked up the microphone and then announced to everyone that the first dance would be the bride and governor dance. He then dragged my daughter onto the dance floor and the DJ started playing a slow dance. My daughter looked confused. Her new husband looked angry.

As they danced, I walked up to my new son-in-law, whispered to him, "this ain't right, let me fix it" then walked up to the DJ. As the song ended and a very light spattering of applause followed, I took the microphone from the DJ and spoke.

"Thank you, Your Honor, for that wonderful tribute you have given my daughter tonight. I know you are a busy man, and that you have chosen to give us so much of your time to us is very special. Before you go, give me a moment to express my appreciation for what you have given us today.

"First of all, you have given my daughter her dream come true. More than anything she wanted her mother here so that the whole of her family, at least for these few hours, would all be one. Never mind that there was no RSVP, and we had no idea that you and your horde of sycophants and thugs would stampede over this special event and displace so many of our invited guests, but I guess that is the price to pay for the honor of the bride seeing her mother for the first time in five years.

"I appreciate that our estrangement was the result of her turning to sex work to help her lover bribe his way into ever more billions of investments dollars and profits. But then you rescued her from that by paying for her services with a quarter of a million dollars in bribes to local politicians for easy permits for his property projects in our state. That is a lot of money for arm candy, so I can see why you tagged along.

I continued, naming the politicians and the amounts given and the developments that were permitted. Dozens of phone cameras capturing every word, as well as the local TV station.

At that, the governor rushed out of the ballroom and the building, with Kim chasing ten steps behind.

I then turned to the stunned guests and said, "well, now that we have rid ourselves of the parasite, let us celebrate the joining of these two beautiful people into one. Hank, if you would take your bride and start us off with the first dance of the evening...

As my daughter and her groom danced to the delight of the guests, I slipped out of the dance hall and watched the governor and his entourage standing by their fleet of Black SUVs discussing something. Then they each got into their vehicles and hurriedly departed the area, leaving only one lone person standing. She slowly reached into her purse and pulled out her cell phone. I walked over.

"Hey Kim."

"Jack, please don't start on me. I didn't mean for this happen."

"I didn't walk over here to give you shit. I just wanted to check and see if you were okay. I guess I pissed off your date."

Yeah, and probably cost me this gig. But you did what you had to do, I guess. right.

"Did you call an Uber?"

"Yeah."

"Janet really did want you to be here. She is leaving on her honeymoon at once after the reception, any chance you can visit her here in a couple of weeks, that is, without any of your boyfriends."

"I don't know, I suspect after today she won't want to see me."

"She will. She loves you. She doesn't have a choice. It's hard wired into her DNA."

"How can she after today?"

"She had a good mother when she needed her most."

I could see Kim's eyes water.

"I'll try to visit. Give me your phone number."

I did.

"By the way, did the governor buy you for your good looks, or your talent as a dominatrix?

"Shit, you knew about that?"

"Yeah, I knew."

"Well, yeah, the governor liked a good spanking, and he needed to be told he was a naughty boy. He also enjoyed some really disgusting stuff, but I'd rather not admit to right now.

"Damn, I guess that just blew my NDA."

A couple of minutes later an uber driver showed up and she was gone. She didn't call two weeks later, she didn't visit. She just disappeared again.

The television station that covered the governor's presence at the wedding didn't show it that night, or any night to follow. But our own videographer gave my daughter his product, one with the governor's gross conduct edited out, and one of his own editing showing the governor's visit in its worst light. Janet promptly posted it on the Internet under the heading "Asshole Governor crashes my wedding." Soon a number of guests added to it with their own videos. It quickly became a sensation.

Then videos of the local news crew videoing the wedding also showed up on the Internet with the question, "why didn't this make the news?" "Was it because the governor owns the station?" Then competing news stations picked up on the story.

The thing had a life of its own. Guests from the wedding were interviewed by local media. I was interviewed. We all gave an unabashed account of the rudeness of the governor. I gave a state-wide newspaper a detailed account of the governor's girlfriend, to include her work for Frank Milano with details of his stable of girls he used to entice investors into buying into his projects. The paper found additional sources to verify my claims and then wrote an in-depth article on Frank and his trafficking in sexual enticements. While procuring prostitutes alone was only a misdemeanor, the fact that state and international lines were crossed made it both a felony and a federal offense, and the fact that many of his investors where account managers using other people's money brought in a whole slew of criminal activity involving bribery, fraud, violation of fiduciary responsibilities, and embezzlement by way of accepting payment by sexual favors. To top it off, conspiracy was thrown into the mix, the laws against racketeering applied, allowing forfeiture of all the ill-gotten gains.

State and federal authorities charged Frank, several clients, key employees, and the women involved, including Kim. Prosecutors seized the defendants' assets and identified the hostesses as participants in the fraud. Several defendants reached plea agreements in exchange for testimony, but assets deemed proceeds of crime remained subject to forfeiture under racketeering laws.

Kim had a fair-sized bank and investment accounts and a pricy waterfront condo in Tampa. All was seized. Her sentence, even with her cooperation, put her in jail for two years in the state prison for women outside of Ocala.

Meanwhile, Janet had a baby. Her first child, Rose, was born, I took a dozen pictures of the baby, of our daughter and her husband, had them printed and sent them by mail to Kim in prison. She had been a wonderful mother all those years ago.

Some weeks later, I received a gushing letter thanking me for the pictures. It was full of apologies and protests that she didn't deserve the kindness and a plea to at least allow her some occasional information on her children. I didn't respond for six months, then sent more pictures of our son, his girlfriend and of course our grandbaby. I did not write anything to her, just the pics.

Her response:

Jack,

Thank you so much for the pictures allowing me another glimpse of my grandchild, and my children. I don't deserve this. Please accept a very tearful and heartfelt thank you.

I sent additional pictures a few months later. She responded with another "thank you" note.

Weeks before her release date, I wrote asking if she had any provision made for her release. She wrote back that she had nothing, no money and no friends so she had applied to stay at a halfway house until she could get on her feet. I offered to provide transportation to Jacksonville, and some modest accommodation if she wanted. She jumped at the offer.

On her release date, I picked her up at the prison and drove her back to Jacksonville. I answered questions about the kids and our new grandchild, but I asked her nothing. Most of the ride was quiet. She told me that she had been ill for a few months now. Migraines

I took her to a small apartment I had rented, less than a mile from our old home. Parked in front of the apartment was a small used car. I gave her the keys to the apartment and car, showed her inside the partly furnished apartment. I told her that this was a six-month lease. Everything, including the vehicle, was in my name. This in case she got involved in any self-destructive behavior, I could end my involvement with her. She nodded.

"When can I see my grandchild?" Kim asked.

"Our daughter and I will stop by tomorrow evening and discuss that with you. Right now, it's an open question.

"Now, tell me about your illness."

"I have medication that keeps my migraines somewhat under control, but it does limit what I can do." She went on to explain her symptoms. It sounded bad.

The next day I looked into getting Kim medical insurance I learned that in Florida, she was not entitled to Medicaid as a single person without dependents unless she was found to be disabled under Social Security, which was a long process. So, I made an appointment to see my doctor and prepared to open my wallet - again - for her medical expenses.

That evening our daughter and I met Kim at her apartment. Kim was woozie, telling us that she felt a migraine coming on so she had taken medication that prevented the worst of it.

She asked about her grandchild, about how she was progressing. She asked about the birth and the thousands of other details that mothers love to share. I was a bit surprised how fast our daughter let her guard down. After only twenty minutes, she was as animated about talking about her baby as her mother was. It was as if the past seven years had never happened.

After an hour, during a pause in the conversation Janet asked, "why? Why, Mother, did you leave us? How could you leave us?"

Kim's answer was a shake of the head, and a tearful, "I didn't mean to hurt you. I didn't mean to hurt anyone."

"How could we not have been hurt? Did you even think about us as you destroyed our family."

"I... I had to get out. I was suffocating. I felt it was the only thing I could do. I didn't want to hurt anyone, but I was dying. I had lost my way. With both of my children out of the house and Jack working so many long hours, I felt rudderless. I was so very, very selfish."

"What, are you saying my brother, my father, and I, your family, was poisoning you?"

"No, no I am not saying that at all, what I am trying to say..."

"It sure as hell sounds like that is what you are saying! So, tell me, what exactly was suffocating you?"

With Kim staring at the floor, in a sad, small voice she could only say, "my life was suffocating. Not my husband, not my children, my life."

"Funny, my brother, my father and you were my life when you dumped us like garbage."

At that our daughter got up, walked to the door, and left. Kim was sobbing, her face was buried in her hands.

I stayed for just long Kim to calm down, and said, "it is good to get this out. Let's try again when things cool a bit. Keep it honest, and maybe we might find some common ground where you might get a part of your babies back. Difficult but not impossible."

With that, I kissed her on her head. She looked up at me through her tears and gave me a pathetic smile. "How is it you are still on my side after what I have done."

"I've always been on your side. That is what unconditional love is all about. There is still pain and anger, but underneath that is love. We will never get back to where we were, but we will always be connected."

A second kiss on her head, I got up and left.

I found my daughter in the parking lot seething in anger. We agreed to drive over to a nearby all night diner, where we had some cake and coffee and I talked her down a little bit. We talked about the mother we loved, not the one we had now. She softened a little but swore she couldn't see a way to get over what "this woman became."

"I understand. It might not happened, maybe the best we do is let her know how badly she hurt us. But even that might be progress."

We talked for another hour, before calling it quits.

Neither child visited their mother until after the doctor appointments.

The doctor's appointment led to a referral to an MRI. The MRI found a neoplasm on the frontal lobe of her brain. That led to a referral to a neurosurgeon, which led to a biopsy. The neoplasm was malignant, aggressive, inoperable and terminal. All the doctor offered was pallative care.

I held off telling the kids until we had a second confirming opinion. Then I told them. That night the kids all came to her apartment. I was already there.

I opened the door when the kids knocked. Kim was sitting at the table, looking older than her 52 years. My daughter handed her baby to her husband, stepped inside, walked to the table her mother was sitting at and burst into tears.

"Mommy, I thought we had more time. More time to work through this. You are going to leave me again. I don't want you to leave. Not again."

My son, usually restrained, went to his mother's other side, wrapped his arm around her and cried, quietly at first, but soon his tears were sobs.

I stood at the rear of the room, my eyes wet. Not for Kim, but for my kids.

Then the baby started to howl. That shifted the mood. From that point on the conversations about the baby, about where the kids were with their careers, our son's romantic adventures and what the future might bring.

The next day we moved Kim into my home.

The days that followed I was home early every night. Our daughter was there as often as she could, three or four times a week. Our son visited maybe twice a week.

I could see her deteriorating quickly. On a good night, she told me she had seen everyone in our family cry over her fate. But not me. I always stood in the back of the room and watched everyone else cry, but not me. Surely, we had 25 good years, wasn't there anything I could shed a tear over?

"I have cried. I cried the night you ended our marriage and every day after for a month. There are no more tears."

"I... I am sorry that I hurt you."

"Yeah, okay."

"For what its worth, the neurologist told me that my car crash and my traumatic brain injury could have changed my personality, even my libido, and it might have even caused this brain cancer."

"Convenient. You have a note from your doctor saying what you did was not your fault. So, no need for you to feel bad. Not so your family that you blew up, but how important were they anyway, huh?"

"That's not what I meant. I gave you all everything for 25 years, you all didn't need me anymore."

I just shook my head and walked away.

The weeks that followed saw a significant slip in her faculties. I was home early every evening. I paid for a nurse to be with her during the day. The kids came home each weekend and stayed with her. The kids noticed the decline. After a couple of months, her memory had degraded so much that when she saw the kids again, she talked to them as if they were still in school. She asked about their homework, their teachers, about their friends, recalling the names of their classmates when they were twelve years old. When her grandchild was present, she'd ask whose baby it was.

These were actually good conversations, the kids and her were transported to happy days, before abandonment and betrayal existed.

I was present but barely took part. Kim would try to get me to engage. I was never abrupt or angry, but I didn't want to go there. I would just divert the conversation to something involving the kids.

Weeks later, she lost most of her memory. She didn't recognize her kids, or me. I was told death was imminent.

I stayed at home full time. No one should die alone. On the last day, the visiting hospice nurse told me that the end would occur within hours. It was three o'clock the next morning. I was sleeping in a chair next to the bed. Kim called out.

"Jack, are you awake."

It took me only a second to shake the sleep from my head. "Of course, Kim, do you need anything?"

"I know this is asking a lot, but could you please hold my hand, just this one last time?"

"Of course, Kim, of course." I rose and took her hand.

Her memory suddenly seemed intact.

"Jack, I have been so terrible to you, and you have always been so there for me. I don't know why you haven't given up on me, but I am glad you didn't. I have been so evil, so cruel, so crude. You have never, ever tried to return the hurt. I don't deserve you. I am so ashamed. I know forgiveness is beyond what I can hope for. But please, Jack, please know that I did love you, and I love you now. Please know that I lost my way and ended up destroying whatever goodness I ever had. Your love was the greatest thing I ever had, and I threw it away. God forgive me."

"Kim, we had 25 very good years. You gave me two loving children and raised them to be good people. Nothing you did since then has changed that. Maybe, maybe, if we met again, maybe we might be able to recapture some of what we once had."

"Oh Jack." Tears cascaded down her cheeks. A smile entered her lips. Her gray pallor, her dull eyes, changed and for a brief moment the women I married appeared again.

Then the light left her eyes. Her eyes closed. Her breath became labored. Within the hour, she was gone.

I cried for the first time in seven years.