Turning Myself Into a Slut Volume 01

*jump to the "!!!" for spiciness, first few paragraphs are backstory*

Like many, I have struggled with the opposing views of what sexuality is as a woman. I grew up with lots of abuse of all kinds, and fluctuated between identifying my sexuality as a curse/risk/threat and it being a tool/fun/bonding experience. I spent most of my adult life conflating it with love. I was a pick me. I thought if I fucked better than anyone, sucked harder and took it in every hole, that a man would love me for more than my body (foolish, I know)

I had a stint as a sex worker in my early 20s and sadly, that taught me more about self respect and autonomy than any relationship. I was very picky, and all of my clients were genuinely decent people who wanted to forego the stresses of relationships, didn't want to fool some girl into thinking it was anything more than sex. Many of them were aware that they weren't ugly, weren't broke, weren't boring, and were decent in bed but just not emotionally ready to commit. At the time I was compassionate yet not fully understanding of that reasoning, even though I did respect it. I get it now. Stint aside, the majority of the sex I've had has been within relationships. One spanning 3 years, another spanning 4, and a few lasting only a few months. Recently out of the 4 year, soul crushing, mind numbingly boring experience that was my last relationship, I find myself for the first time contemplating what my clients told me and feeling curious. I have never been one for "casual" anything. I used to wear that statement like a badge of honor, but what has it gotten me? Wasted years, wasted money, wasted energy, disappointments, lies, cheating, betrayal, the inability to trust ever again. The moral superiority I held was so flawed... I thought myself a BETTER, more upstanding hedonist. I thought "I just want the kinkiest, nastiest, daily sex but only with someone I love and trust" yet continued having very boring sex after years of evidence that there was NO LOVE OR TRUST? Ha. Fool. If I give my heart, soul, all 3 holes, time, money and energy to a man all to not be pleased? Then maybe I have been wrong. I want FUN.

Below are some fantasies I wish to complete before I am 35...

!!!

I have been drinking all night while playing pool. I came to the club alone, but a handsome man offered to play a few rounds with me.

"8 Ball to corner pocket" he calls out from the other side of the table. The room is spinning as he sinks it so effortlessly. I still had 4 balls on the table, stripes.

"Well... I guess that's best out of 3 then" he says, glancing more at my ripped jeans than my face. He couldn't see the look on my face even if he wanted to, as I positioned it behind my drink to disguise my thoughts. I forgot any kind of response, as all I wanted was to be ravaged in the bathroom. On the floor... Up against the wall. The door. Fucked hard in the alley...

"Good gaaame... Mmmmm..." I slurp down more of my drink while slurring my response. The tingling on my clit is accompanied by the fullness of my bladder, intensifying both my physical horniness as well as my urges to release and be released on.

"Sooo... You wanna go again or... Another drink? You sure you aren't hungry?" This time he has walked around the table and is staring directly at me.

"Shnawww I'm FIIINE thank yeeeew. I am hungry but..." I slur out, stumbling slightly. He reaches a hand out to my elbow to steady me.

"Wow, I uh... can't let you drive like this. You said you're hungry? Maybe that will sober you up." I can't help it. I stare point blank at the bulge in his pants, my mouth agape and eyes bleary.

"Yeah I am ravenous... and thirsty." He notices.

"Uhhh what did you have in mind?" I can tell he's a little slow. Or innocent. Or like many men, he's trying to play nice. I call his bluff, slowly looking directly at him.

"I want you to feed me your cock until I'm puking up every drink I had tonight. I want you to slap me, choke me, spit on me, piss down my throat... I want you to make me squirt, then fuck me in the ass until I'm pissing on myself. I want you to piss and cum inside my ass. I want you to wrap your belt around my neck and choke me as I cum, fuck me until I CRY." Instantly I regret it. Oh god, what if he actually respects me and is offended that I--- WHO CARES. Will he do it or not? He looks taken aback. I play it off "Hahaaha that's what I hear whenever someone orders one of those drinks... Sex on the beach? Ha..." He raises an eyebrow, I can see the gears turning slowly.

"Ohhhhh yeah. Hell of a name for a drink. Sex on the beach might not be fun, the sand and everything..." I have to go BAD now. I can feel my hips shifting, my pussy pulsing to hold it. He seems to notice. Before I really realize it, he has moved forward, backing me into the bar wall. We are in a dark corner, the dark green walls absorbing the lights of the pool tables and distant bar stools. He has me against the wall with one hand between my legs, gently cupping my vagina and the other pushing down on my lower abdomen, intensifying the fight with my bladder. "So... are you for real? You think I won't make you piss all over yourself right here? You'd like that huh? No... You want a challenge. You want me to tell you that I won't let you cum if you don't save all that piss for when I'm fucking you. Funny drink name my ass. I'm a nice guy™️, but I can tell when I'm passing up a good time. If you're actually down, I want you to go into the men's bathroom and wait for me... have your tits out, mouth open, eyes closed." I am biting my lip and can feel my pussy getting slick just imagining the thrill of waiting. Every time the door opens, I'll wonder if it's him. What will he do? Will he show up? What if it's someone else?

"How will I know it's you?"

"You won't. I have to pay my tab. I'l be there. In a bit."

I float to the men's bathroom. I can smell it from the hallway... Beer piss, faint bleach scent, the car air freshener hanging by a latrine. I get closer... Do I... knock? How many stalls are there? Where do I wait? I forego all the anxieties my past self would have had. I go where I want to be. There aren't very many people here tonight, so the chances of someone else coming in are low but not zero. There is one stall and a row of 3 urinals... Unsure of where he would want me, I go with the riskiest option. I want to be a human urinal. They are also further from the door and there only being one toilet means we get a slight block from view. There is no lock on either door.

I clumsily get down on my knees, the cold floor sticky on my ripped jeans, leaving a sheen on my exposed skin. I pull my hoodie up, bra down. I close my eyes and let my imagination run wild...

I don't know him. What if he left? What if he will kill me? Would it be rape if I enjoyed it at this point? Will other people see us?

I didn't realize until now that not only did I have to pee, but I could feel a bowel movement. Maybe anal would be off the table then...

I hear the door open. I don't cover my tits or get up but I do open my eyes. He slowly walks up and without warning, dick already in hand, begins pissing all over my face. In shock at first by the abruptness I gasp and choke. "Close your eyes you stupid bitch, it will burn" he orders. I do, feeling the warmth covering me entirely. I have to go sooo bad... He continues in spurts. I can tell he still has more in the tank of course. I wipe and open my eyes briefly, at which he slaps me, HARD across the face. I felt myself release a bit of pee at this and gasp. "No, keep your fucking eyes closed. I want you to FEEL this, SMELL IT, taste ALL of it." He shoves two fingers into my mouth, aiming for the back of my throat. He fingers around, causing me to gag. Between gags, he slaps my face with his spit and piss covered hand. *My pussy is getting so wet just writing this btw*

He keeps going until the gags turn into a massive stream of vomit, mostly alcohol, all over my tits. "Now that you're empty, time to get filled. You really are a filthy bitch. I told the bartender to tell people the bathroom is out of order, but only because I promised him next with you. You better not mind."

I open my eyes in shock, met with an even harder slap in the face. Quickly shutting my eyes he harshly plays with my nipples, slapping my breasts. He places his shoe on my groin, adding pressure. I moan out and ask "Please I need to go SO BAD THAT IT HURTS"

"Well, maybe you should take off your pants. Wouldn't wanna make a mess!" He laughs sarcastically. Drunk, with my eyes closed, on a slippery floor I struggle to undo them. "God, you are WASTED what a lucky night..." I hear the click of a pocket knife. "Allow me". I freeze, breath ragged... I have always been into non cutting knife play but one wrong move and... He yanks the fabric of my crotch, quite a feat of strength considering it is extremely wet denim. Thin and cheap tho. he cuts a hole out, then slices my thin lacey thong off. The air hitting my exposed holes is cold yet inviting. I feel his tongue lapping up the slick wetness that has been gathering there. Fun fact, I don't like getting head but in this moment it almost makes me explode. "No... please don't... don't do... THAT!!!!" He had shoved 2 fingers into me, his long digits finding my g spot instantly. My pussy clenches down on them. I start moaning before he even thrusted them a second time. Still on my knees with his fingers inside me and his other hand around my throat now, he tells me I can open my eyes. He spits on my face the second I do. He looks perplexed. "Ya know... I've always wanted a complete slut. Have you ever been fisted? I used to be into martial arts, something about fisting has always seemed... funny. Do you think it feels good?"

"I have always wanted to see how many fingers I can take..." I say it shyly, knowing damn well that half of the porn I watch is of fisting. Anal, vaginal, doesn't matter. The thought of being filled up so completely. Painfully being forced open like that...

"Well, sounds like a yes to me. The challenge is, if you piss on me I won't fuck your ass"

He adds a 3rd finger, which stretches me quite a bit. He's going slow, but deep, hard thrusts that force me open.

"ahhhh ahhhhhh mmmmmmm fuuuuuck...."

he keeps pace.

"Ready for 4? Thought so."

Without waiting for my response he somehow forces his 4th finger into my now swollen and drenched vagina. I scream, in pleasure and some pain.

"oh my gooooood thank you, thank you for stretching me like this" I fight back tears. It hurts, yes. But the feeling of fullness and how deep it is sends a shockwave from the tips of my toes to my stomach.

I piss everywhere. All over his hand, it splatters off the floor soaking my pants entirely. "Awww you nasty bitch! I'm supposed to piss on YOU. Guess I won't be fucking you in the ass now! I was saving this piss for it. Come here."

He drags my by my throat onto his cock. Deep, hard, ruthlessly, he fucks my face. I'm gagging, puking, unable to pull away because he is using both hands to force my head down.

"Take this shot baby".

He pisses down my throat, and I feel as if I am drowning and puking at the same time, my eyes water, and I can feel myself inaudibly crying for mercy

"Look up at me"

I do, and he spits in my eye.

"You're suuuuch.... a good girl..."

He's still pissing, now thrusting slowly but deeply. I'm wretching up all of it, all over myself. A disgusting mess, my pussy dripping fluids all over the ground, into the puddle of our piss, my puke and a few tears. He releases my head, one final torrent of vomit falling down the front of my body, all the way down to my clit.

I catch my breath and he says "I bet you really wanted that in your ass huh?"

"Well actually... Anal isn't a great idea right now... I kind or have to poop."

He looks at me blankly.

"Do I look like I give a FUCK?"

I swallow hard. "It's just... I don't wanna have an accident it would be embarrassing..."

He starts laughing. Then I realize the absurdity myself. Here I am, covered in many fluids, on a dirty bathroom floor with a stranger, being degraded, awaiting the same from the bartender.

He grabs me by the hips, placing me in front of him. "Lets get you ready"

back into my vagina go the fingers. 4 doesn't hurt as bad, and he speeds up more. Unsure if it was the laughter or my arousal, but I feel more relaxed.

"Please fill me up all the way. I need to know what it's like... I can take it"

"No problem little slut."

He starts off with all his fingers straight, angling them into my dripping hole. It sends shivers up my spine. He holds it there for a bit, slowly easing it in. Once in, he slowly works in and out. The squelching sounds are music to my ears and I feel myself let go. Not even squirt, but regular piss gushes forth from the trauma of being stretched so wide and being so drunk, but it makes me relax even more not having to hold it.

"Oh so you're READY then?"

he balls up his fist and violently shoves it into me, making me cry. It hurts sooo good... I can hear my asshole slapping out soft farts from the sheer force being applied to that region. It embarrasses me. He noticed it too...

"Oh looks like we're leaving someone out. Don't want this one to be jealous"

He removes his hand from my vagina and transfers the wetness to my asshole.. So warm, wet, so ready.. He pushes a finger in, causing me to tense up. He uses his other hand to keep fingering me, switching to a G spot grip and giving me a break from the fist. Working his way into my asshole he notices the bowel movement. "Oh you do have to go! It feels really hard... How about this. I'll give you a piss enema?"

"Hahahaha... pleeease."

*Thanks for reading. Volume 2 uhhh whenever I feel like it. I work night shift and am horny the whole time so I'm sure I'll come up with something very soon. Long time reader, first time poster. Love yall! ;]*