How to Orally Please a Gentleman.

The ability to perform fellatio in a ladylike fashion is one that's sadly disappearing from society. We now live in a world where so many women don't know how to set a table correctly or tastefully arrange a vase of flowers. It is unsurprising that so many have failed to be educated in the correct way to orally delight a gentleman. Let's put that right, shall we?

MORALS, ETHICS, AND ETIQUETTE.

If someone visits your home, what is the first thing you do? Chances are you offer them a cup of tea or coffee and perhaps even a biscuit. Why? Because you're a decent human being who was raised right; a hot drink costs but pennies, yet the mere offer speaks volumes of your good character.

So is it really such a big ask to offer a gentleman the hospitality of your mouth? Now, one is certainly not saying you should gobble every guy that comes along, but I do believe there are times when a lady should extend the courtesy.

Perhaps he has gone that extra mile to help you. Does he not deserve a little something for his troubles?

Sure, you could slip him a little cash, but how much? It's often difficult to put a financial value on something, and too little looks insulting while too much makes him uncomfortable. However, a simple thank you, BJ, is far more classy than vulgar cash and certainly more appreciated than a clichéd cake.

Or what of that gentleman who has amused you all evening with riveting anecdotes and been most generous with purchasing your favourite tipple? Is it not polite to thank him with a small oral gesture? Of course, one doesn't kneel for one or two glasses of wine, but to accept any more without planning to offer a BJ, at the very least, is unbecoming of a lady.

Porn has somewhat vulgarised the act, cheapening it in the same way cookery shows have destroyed soufflés. Sadly, this has left many with the idea that a BJ is somehow a dirty act only performed by the lowest of ladies. Something you'd find going on in a council estate pizza shop while awaiting your order.

So, what actually is the difference? The answer is simple, elegant refinement. It is the difference between a bowl of spaghetti allo sgolio in a ristorante and a tub of "just add boiling water..." A well-executed dignified oral performance says far more than gobbling with gusto ever will.

UNDERSTANDING MEN

To appreciate why a lady should perform oral one needs to understand men. Men are biologically programmed to ejaculate on a regular basis. Throughout the day that urge quietly builds up. The innocent smile of an attractive waitress, the seductive wiggle of a girl walking in front, that receptionist toying with her pen. Drip by drip those innocuous little observations build into a deep ache that can only be relieved through ejaculation.

Men of course have other means at their disposal to deal the the building pressure but on a hot day do we not all appreciate the offer of a cold drink even though we have taps at home?

Unlike other sexual acts, a BJ requires little of a man, bar good manners. He is free from the stress of putting on a good show or trying to last. A BJ allows him to relax and release without worry, and for the gentleman with a stressful life full of responsibilities, that simple thoughtful act can mean so much.

DRESS TO GO DOWN

One must give careful consideration to attire when a BJ is a possibility. It is well worth checking if your skirt or dress will touch the floor while you're performing the deed for the cleanliness of many a floor leaves a lot to be desired. That long cocktail dress may look elegant, but do you really want it crumpled up on the floor? The classic short black dress may sound a good option, but remember, any silvery spills will stand out a mile.

Give thought to how easily your clothes will let you descend. Skin-tight jeans may look fashionable but are rather uncomfortable to squat down in. Besides, you are likely to develop a little dew in the valley, and so more airy attire is recommended to retain comfort.

It may be tempting to consider a micro skirt, but this usually suggests more is on offer, and a lady does not falsely advertise. Cloth that comes mid-thigh makes a clear statement you're willing to kneel, but not offering it on a plate.

Shoes are often a second thought, but a heel helps immensely with balance and getting extra depth in the all-important squat. Remember, both the descent and rise should appear effortless and elegant; heels help with both as well as reducing thigh stress when down.

CORRECT POSTURE.

Although there are many positions, it is recommended that a young lady first masters performing fellatio on a standing gentleman. This is not only the most requested position at social events but one that can be performed almost anywhere without specialist equipment and allows the lady to retain an elegant posture.

Though it must be given upon which descended position to take based up personal flexibility, floor cleanliness, and height differences. A young lady would be wise to practice the three basic positions.

THE SIMPLE ASS TO ANKLE POSE.

With legs slightly ajar, the lady descends slowly and gracefully with straight back and head up. It may help to retain eye contact with the gentleman to assist posture throughout the decline. It is not unusual for his hands to be placed upon your shoulders and a light pressure applied to assist the descent. High heels will ensure your ankles are suitably aligned to provide a comfortable, stable seat for the task ahead.

THE ONE KNEE POSE.

The lady genuflexes into position by stepping forward with her dominant leg before bending it and descending. It is vital to use the dominant leg as it ensures both a controlled fall and rise. The other leg will naturally lower until the knee rests upon the floor. It goes without saying that this position favours a nice clean carpet, although many a gentleman will offer his coat to kneel upon.

THE FULL TWO LEG KNEEL

Although not as graceful as other positions, it does offer advantages to the less flexible as well as being the more comfortable of the three. It is of particular use when one is feeling the effect of the evening's beverages.

ORALLY STIMULATING THE GENTLEMAN

Once in the descended position, it is time to expose the gentleman's penis. Although some will unfasten their buttons and buckles themselves, most appreciate a ladies delicate touch, for it demonstrates a willing enthusiasm. There is no need to remove his trousers. Enough to gain access is adequate.

It is rare for the gentleman not to be fully erect at this stage. Should he still be flaccid, then you should give thought to improving your appearance in the future. A light tickle with a well-manicured fingernail upon the region between the testicles and anus will ensure a rapid erection.

At such close quarters, the penis may look larger and more intimidating than you'd imagined. Feel free to express such thoughts as all men will feel flattered for them.

Regardless of size, you now have a duty to perform, although a rather pleasurable one. Using one hand, form a ring with thumb and index finger around the base of his shaft and extend your pinky finger. It helps to think of holding a cup of Earl Grey. This hand will form a barrier between yourself and the gentleman's garden.

It is now a matter of enveloping the gentleman within your buccal cavity to a comfortable depth and embracing with your lips to form a seal, which will both increase his enjoyment and prevent embarrassing leakage

The basic action is a simple nodding of the head, allowing your mouth to glide back and forth along the shaft. Inhalation will tighten your grip upon him, adding greatly to his pleasure. By altering both nodding speed and suction intensity, one can delight a gentleman with the most delectable sensations.

It may help to think of the penis as a musical instrument. Think of your favourite musical composition and suck to the rhythm or bob your head to the rise and fall of the notes

An accomplished fellatrix will also vary the depth of which she takes the gentleman from shallow working of the head to a deep engulf, which embraces his whole shaft. You may struggle at first with the latter, but fear not for the skill will develop with each gentleman.

Although it is good to service the entire shaft, the bulk of your endeavours should be the head for this delivers the greatest pleasure. Do not neglect that most powerful of muscles the tongue, swirling around his head, or simply flicking will induce the most wondrous sensations.

Feel free to rest your mouth and continue to stimulate him with gentle caresses of the hand should fatigue take hold, but keep such breaks short as not to diminish his enjoyment.

You may have heard talk among the lower classes of spitting upon the shaft. Such behaviour is not befitting of a lady. One should not slobber upon him like a starving boxer dog but act as if one were dining at the dinner table. Nor should one engage in "dirty talk" for a lady does not speak with her mouthful.

Short of accidentally biting it off or blowing it up like a balloon, it is nearly impossible to do anything with a penis that does not inflict pleasure of some degree. A girl can rest assured that regardless of experience, he will enjoy her efforts.

THE JOYOUS ARRIVAL

As much as men enjoy the journey, it is from the destination they derive the greatest pleasure. Upon approach, you will no doubt become aware of his growing excitement. It is essential at this point to retain him between one's lips so as to not mar that magical moment. It is common and to be expected that he cradles the back of your head in his hand to encourage you to take him deeper or at least not to withdraw your efforts.

In the final moments, you will feel bulging, growing harder and stiffer. He may vocalize a mild moan or gasp, and some trembling of the leg is not unheard of. It is in these final moments a lady must brace herself for what is to come.

These may be scary moments for the uninitiated. The penis will twitch erratically, tapping upon tongue and palate, followed by a rippling sensation as the muscles spasmically contract. A second later, one will experience the full force of the erotic eruption.

Few forget the first time a man casts his seed. The warm gelatinous texture, the salty-sweet taste. It may erupt with such force as to pebble-dash your tonsils or flood the tongue as if a dam had burst. A girl remembers it as she does her first oyster or spoonful of caviar.

If you have concerns of reacting badly to a gentleman's emissions, then one can acclimatize oneself by mixing egg white and a pinch of salt, then sipping through a straw.

SPIT OR SWALLOW.

A lady never spits but may discreetly remove the deposit into a tissue, as if it were a fishbone at the dining table. Should you wish to consider this option then it's important to carry a handkerchief as running around with a mouthful of cock creme is unbecoming of a lady.

By far the best option is too swallow as quickly as possible. One hard gulp and it's gone, no gargling or letting it linger upon the tongue, just down it and smile.

It must be remembered that in many cases the choice to spit or swallow is removed should the gentleman ejaculate with great velocity. A hot jet propelled to the back of the throat will give you little choice but to swallow as it trickles down.

A young lady is likely to feel bewildered and dazed after her first oral experience. The excitement of the explosion, the musky scent, and the unique masculine taste all combine to overwhelm the senses of the uninitiated, to leave them stunned and amazed. A rush of arousal combined with surging adrenaline levels leaves many a young lady in an almost inebriated state in which case the gentleman should assist her to her feet.

AFTERCARE

Most ladies like to seek a moment's solitude to reflect and recover from their experiences. It is wise to carry a fresh set of undergarments for a great many find themselves uncomfortably damp and in need of a dry pair.

Even once swallowed the taste may linger longer than enjoyed. It is customary to imbibe a glass of good quality liqueur to cleanse the palate, paid of course by the grateful gentleman.