On The Same Page Ch. 16

Note: I want to Thank everyone who followed all of these chapters ans the entire story with me! It has been an absolute pleasure writing again! I know my writing is so far from perfect, I am far from a professional writer, but putting my thoughts down and growing this into what it became was so amazing. All of your comments and support have have been so great. Thank you all for letting me find my love of writing again. I hope you enjoy the final chapter of On The Same Page! As always, positive comments and constructive feed back are more than welcome and encouraged!

Chapter 16: Understanding

Robbie's POV

Cassie had been looking out the window for most of our descent. As the plane banked, she leaned forward a little, watching the neighborhoods spread out beneath us.

"You okay, Chica?"

She turned toward me.

"Yeah. Just weird coming back."

I reached for her hand. She threaded her fingers through mine and settled back into her seat. Across the aisle, Angel closed the book she'd barely touched since we left Philadelphia.

"Anybody else already feel hot?"

"Dude, we're still in the plane!" Cassie said.

"I know. I was just getting used to Pennsylvania summer. It's kind of nice to have summer temperatures that don't feel like they're trying to kill you."

That got a smile out of her. I was grateful for it.

Cassie had been quieter than usual since we boarded. She hadn't spent the whole flight worrying aloud or running through everything she wanted to say to her parents. Mostly, she'd leaned against me while we watched a movie on my tablet. Every once in a while, though, I'd catch her staring at the screen without seeming to see it, biting her lip or fidgeting with the hem of her skirt.

I understood. She wanted to see her mom. She was also worried about what would happen when she did.

The wheels touched down, and she squeezed my hand.

"Well," she said. "Here we go, Papi."

I lifted her hand and kissed it.

"Together. I got you."

She looked at me for a second, then leaned over and kissed my cheek.

"Thank you, Papi."

Once we were off the plane, we found our bags and made our way to the rental car center. I'd reserved a Suburban because Angel was coming back with considerably more than she'd arrived with, and because spending the next couple of days folded into a compact car sounded fucking miserable.

The woman at the counter looked up at me, then down at the reservation.

"You requested the full-size SUV?"

"Yes, ma'am."

She smiled, biting her lip slightly.

"I can see why."

Cassie chuckled softly beside me.

"Oh, darlin', you don't know how... full size... he is," she said with a wink.

I looked at her, trying unsuccessfully to keep a straight face.

"Really, Cass?"

"I was just helping the young lady get the full picture."

The lady at the rental counter blushed and smiled before saying, "We'll just need proof of insurance."

Cassie took out her phone and opened an insurance app with my details in it. It was a good thing because I had completely forgotten I needed it. Once the woman checked it, she thanked Cassie.

Cassie then left her phone on the counter with her lock screen showing. I just noticed it was a picture of me getting out of the pool. I had to admit, it was very flattering. It showed off my muscled physique quite well, and judging by the way Cassie carefully angled the phone, she wanted somebody else to appreciate it too.

I caught her eye and raised an eyebrow, fighting a smile.

She gave me an entirely innocent look that I didn't believe for a fucking second.

The woman's eyes glanced toward the picture, and her mouth fell open for a fraction of a second. She glanced up at me and blushed slightly. Cassie giggled.

I shook my head, smiling. Apparently, my girlfriend had decided showing me off was part of the rental process.

We finished our paperwork, and as I took the keys, I slipped the young woman a twenty for her trouble.

When we got out of the building, I turned to Cassie.

"Really? The picture too?" I asked, laughing now.

Cassie laughed and said, "Papi, she'll spend that twenty in no time. That visual I gave her, though? That will last forever. And trust me, she'll think about it. Probably later tonight."

"You're very pleased with yourself."

"Did you see her face?"

"I was trying to let the poor woman finish doing her job."

"And I was making her workday more enjoyable."

I laughed and pulled Cassie against my side, kissing the top of her head.

"You're ridiculous, Chica."

"Sometimes, but you love me anyway."

"Of course I do."

Angel took the keys from me once we reached the parking structure and pressed the button. A large black Suburban flashed its lights a few spaces down.

"Oh, good," she said. "We can bring the entire house."

"We have baggage limits," Cassie reminded her.

"I'm choosing not to think about those yet. But seriously, why do we need something that big?"

"Hi, my name is Robbie. Nice to meet you. Figured since you're asking why I wanted something so big, you'd never met me."

Angel rolled her eyes.

"Yeah, all right. Fair point."

The heat was immediately noticeable, of course, and gross. I'd grown up in Texas. Heat wasn't exactly a new experience for me. Still, by the time I had the luggage loaded and got behind the wheel, I was very glad to find out the air conditioning worked extremely well.

I'd hated summer in Texas growing up. It took me almost no time to decide I hated Arizona summer too.

Cassie shut her door and pulled her hair off the back of her neck into a high ponytail.

"Welcome to Arizona, Papi."

"It's a dry heat," Angel said from the back seat.

"So is a fucking oven," I shot back.

Cassie looked between us.

"You two finished?"

"No," we said together.

Their parents lived in Arroyo Vista, a suburb west of Phoenix that Cassie described as having grown from a few smaller neighborhoods into one big one where every intersection had a pharmacy, a coffee shop, and an argument.

On the drive, she pointed out a few places she remembered. A restaurant her dad liked. The shopping center where she'd worked one summer. She commented on how much nicer the roads were. Every once in a while, Cassie would share a memory and Angel would correct her, leading to the inevitable argument.

I let them argue while I followed the directions to the hotel.

We'd booked a two-bedroom suite so Angel would have her own room and we'd have somewhere to put the bags once we collected everything. Cassie had been firm about staying there instead of with her parents. I hadn't argued. Having somewhere she could leave and breathe seemed like a pretty good idea, and Angel didn't want to listen to her mom complain about her leaving all night.

Check-in was easy enough. It wasn't busy. When we got upstairs, Angel immediately claimed the smaller bedroom.

"I know. I'm taking this one."

"Okay," Cassie said. "We're going to need a little time to get ready before we go over there, so take a second to relax."

I carried our bags into the bigger bedroom while Cassie checked her phone. Kat had sent a picture of Lady stretched across the couch, looking dramatic, like she'd been abandoned by everyone she had ever loved.

Cassie held the phone out to me.

"Our puppy is clearly suffering."

I looked at the picture.

"She's on my pillow."

"Grief looks different for everybody."

I sent Kat a message letting her know we'd gotten to the hotel, then asked how her day was going. Cassie sent her a few hearts and a promise to call later before setting the phone down.

For a moment, she just stood beside the bed. I went over to her.

"What time did you tell them?"

"That we'd come by after we checked in. We just need to shower and stuff, then we can go."

"Okay."

Her hands settled against my chest.

"I'm sorry this is how you're spending a couple days out here."

"Being with you?"

"You know what I mean."

"I do." I brushed a strand of hair away from her face. "You asked me to come. I wanted to."

She watched me, her expression softening.

"You're being annoyingly wonderful."

"I'm pretty good at it."

"Clearly."

I kissed her. She held on to the front of my shirt for another second after I pulled back.

"I love you, Papi," she said.

"I love you too, Chica."

Then she closed the bedroom door and started stripping down. She turned on the TV and turned the volume up a little before heading toward the bathroom. She didn't close the door behind her.

I heard the water turn on. I sat on the bed and took my shoes off. I was about to change the channel when Cassie appeared naked in the bathroom doorway.

"Well?"

"Well, what?"

She rolled her eyes.

"Well, I said we needed a shower, Papi. So... are you coming?"

I stood immediately, nodding as I did. My clothes quickly hit the floor as I stripped them off and stumbled toward the bathroom.

That finally got a real laugh out of her.

Cassie stepped into the large walk-in shower and got under the already running water. I slid in behind her and wrapped my arms around her, bringing myself under the water as well. For a moment, she just leaned back against me. I felt her shoulders relax. Her hands settled over mine, holding them against her stomach.

"I thought you would want some time to relax and calm down before tonight."

"Oh, I do, Papi. That's why I need you in here. What are the best ways to get me to relax?"

"Hmm. One of them is to get you a mani-pedi and a spa day."

"Mmhmm, but we don't have time for that."

"Number two is to sit you next to a bonfire, preferably lakeside up north."

"Two for two, but we're down south."

"Hmm. What's the third way? I know this one..."

She tipped her head back against my shoulder, smiling now.

"Oh, yeah. Now I remember. Railing your brains out until you forget whatever's stressing you out?"

"Mmhmm."

She turned in my arms and reached up around my neck, pulling me into a deep kiss. I cupped her face before letting my hands settle against her hips. For all the teasing, there was something vulnerable in how closely she held me. I kissed her again and felt her fingers tighten against the back of my neck. I felt her mood shift immediately and knew what she wanted. My hands immediately cupped her ass. The kiss turned into something that was not slow and intimate; it was hungry and ravenous.

As we kissed, she wrapped her fingers around my stiffening shaft and stroked me until I was fully hard for her. Once I was, I spun her around in my arms again. I pressed my rigid cock against her ass as I lowered one of my hands to her pussy and began rubbing her clit. I could tell she was keeping her moans quiet since her sister was in the other room. I rubbed small circles around her clit before sliding my fingers inside of her. I alternated between fingering her and circling her clit until she was fully ready to take my cock.

I gently pushed her forward. She bent at the waist in front of me, her legs spread wide, and one foot was up on the ball of her foot to give me better access to her pussy. I slid my cock into her in one smooth thrust, letting her warmth envelop me. I began fucking her pussy with long, slow strokes, being very careful to not make too much noise. I reached around to play with her clit as I continued fucking her. She wanted stress relief, and I was bound and determined to give it to her. I plunged my cock deep into her over and over again while maintaining my constant assault on her clit. Her moans filled the shower as I continued pounding her. Then her back began to arch. I watched her cum as quietly as possible as she came undone right in front of me, her eyes rolling back as her orgasm tore through her.

I held her up as she came. She trembled as she rode out the waves of her orgasm. Once she recovered, she stood and turned towards me. She pulled me into another hungry kiss before sinking down to her knees. She engulfed my cock quickly, taking my cock all the way to the back of her throat. I rested my hand on the back of her head as she worked her warm, wet mouth over my shaft. I was already close, so it took me almost no time before I warned her that I was about to cum. She didn't slow down; she didn't change her pace. I erupted into her mouth. Thick ropes of cum shot out of my cock as my cock twitched. She looked up at me, locking eyes with me as she swallowed it all eagerly.

Now it was my head that was spinning. We took our time together beneath the water. The tension she'd carried through the flight finally eased, and for a little while, neither of us had to think about dinner or what her parents might say.

I braced a hand against the tiled wall while Cassie wrapped her arms around my waist. I held her in return. As the water poured over us, she looked up and smiled. It was different from the teasing smile she'd given me in the doorway. Softer. Unguarded.

"I really appreciate you being here for this, Papi. Not just for this, as amazing as the sex is. More for the fact that you're willing to fly across the country, help my sister with the rest of her stuff, and get dinner with my parents knowing it's going to be... difficult."

"Mi Vida, I love you. This is part of what we signed up for. Being there for each other."

She watched me.

"I can't promise I'll have the perfect answer to everything they ask," I added. "But I can tell them the truth."

"That's what I want."

"Then that's what we'll do."

I rested my forehead against hers. She kissed me.

"I love you too, Papi."

I held her a while longer before we got around to actually showering.

Afterward, we got dressed. I wore a black short-sleeved button-down shirt and khakis made from a lightweight material that made me very happy in this heat. Cassie dressed a little more modestly than she usually did, wearing a black sundress with a floral pattern that hung just past her knees. Of course, she finished the outfit with a pair of heels. She knew heels drove me wild in the best ways. As we finished getting ready, a knock sounded against the bedroom door. Angel stood there with her phone in her hand.

"Dad says they're home."

Cassie took a breath, then nodded.

"Okay. Let's go."

After one final check, we headed out. The drive was unusually quiet. I could tell Cassie was nervous, so I took her hand in mine. I got the impression Angel could tell too, because she didn't try to joke around or antagonize her. Besides the quiet music, the only things Cassie really said were directions to her parents' house. As we turned onto their street, she took a deep, steadying breath.

The Davies house sat on a quiet street lined with stucco homes, low walls, and carefully maintained desert landscaping. There was a basketball hoop in the driveway next door and a bicycle lying in the patch of shade beneath somebody's front porch.

Cassie looked at the house as I pulled in.

"Dad finally got around to painting the garage."

Angel leaned forward between the seats.

"You mean Mom finally picked a color."

"Yeah. Sounds about right."

I turned off the engine. Cassie's hand was already on the door handle, but she didn't open it. I touched her knee. She looked over, gave me a small smile, then got out. Larry opened the front door before we reached it.

"There they are."

Angel went straight into his arms.

"Hi, Daddy."

He hugged her, kissed the side of her head, then reached for Cassie.

"Come here, kiddo."

She went without hesitation. He held her longer.

"Good to see you."

"You too, Papa."

When they separated, he offered me his hand.

"Robbie."

"Larry. Thanks for having us."

His grip was firm. His expression was harder to read.

"Come on in."

Maria stood a few feet behind him. Cassie slowed. For a second, neither of them spoke. Then Maria stepped forward.

"Hello, mija."

"Hi, Mom."

Maria put a hand against Cassie's cheek before drawing her into a hug. Cassie's arms came around her, and I saw her eyes close briefly over her mother's shoulder. Whatever else was happening between them, she had needed that. Maria held her for a moment, then let her go and hugged Angel too.

Once Angel stepped back, the four of them stood together near the entrance, and something occurred to me that probably should have been obvious long before then.

Cassie and Angel acted so much alike that I'd stopped noticing how little they resembled each other. They had the same quick responses. The same talent for making an innocent remark sound dirtier than it ever should. Even the way they tilted their heads when they thought somebody was full of shit was almost identical. But standing beside their parents, the difference was suddenly impossible to miss.

Cassie had Larry's fair coloring, and the reddish cast in what was left of his hair made hers suddenly make perfect sense. Angel looked much more like Maria, with dark hair, warm tanned skin, and the same dark eyes. The resemblance was especially clear when Maria smiled. Cassie caught me looking.

"What?"

I smiled.

"I just realized how much you look like your dad."

Larry looked pleased.

"She's always been the pretty one on my side."

"And Angel looks a whole lot like your mom."

"It's funny when people don't believe we're related," Cassie said.

"Until we start talking," Angel added.

Maria's attention shifted to me, and she grew noticeably cooler.

"Hello, Robbie."

"Hello, Maria."

She offered her hand. I took it.

"It's good to see you."

She nodded without quite returning the sentiment, then asked if we wanted something to drink. We followed them into the kitchen. There were pictures everywhere. Family vacations, school portraits, graduations. In one, Cassie and Angel were much younger, both wearing expressions that made me suspect Larry had taken the picture seconds before one of them did something they weren't supposed to.

Cassie saw which one I was looking at.

"You were cute," I told her.

"Were?"

"Are."

"Good recovery, Papi."

Maria's eyes moved toward us at the nickname. Cassie noticed too, but she didn't take it back. Larry handed me a glass of water.

"Angel tells us she's staying in Pennsylvania with you guys."

Angel leaned against the counter.

"I told you I wanted to talk about everything when I got here."

"And now you're here."

"Very observant, Dad."

He looked at her over his glasses. She straightened a little.

"I've accepted the internship. Saul's working the hours around school, and I'm getting everything arranged for my last year at the University of Pittsburgh. I've started the paperwork already."

"Paid?" he asked.

"Yes."

"Doing what, exactly?"

She explained the financial reviews she'd been helping with, and I let her. It was her opportunity. She knew more about the work than I did at that point anyway. Maria listened, then looked at me.

"And she's living at your house."

"In the pool house," Angel said. "I have my own place."

"But on his property, where your sister was staying."

"Yes," I said. "We've worked out the arrangement. She'll have somewhere to stay while she finishes school."

Maria's mouth tightened.

"I don't want either of my daughters feeling like they owe you something because you have money."

"I understand. Angel staying with us doesn't mean she owes me anything, and the internship is between her and Saul. If she decides the job or living there isn't working for her, she can tell us."

"She's allowed to change her mind," Cassie added. "We've told her that."

Angel finally said, "Mom, I'm taking a paid internship. I'm not being adopted."

"Angelica..."

"I know. But I've thought about this."

Larry touched Maria's back lightly.

"We can go over her plans before she leaves."

Cassie set her water glass down.

"We were hoping you'd have dinner with us tonight."

Maria looked at her, then at me.

"Just dinner?"

"And a conversation," Cassie said. "Obviously."

Angel lifted her hand.

"I'll stay here and pack. I have a lot to do, and I'd rather not provide live commentary."

"That would be a first," Cassie said.

"I'm growing."

Larry looked toward Maria.

"The place on Bell Canyon?"

She nodded after a moment.

"All right."

Cassie's hand found mine beneath the edge of the counter. I squeezed it once.

After some convincing by Cassie, they allowed me to drive them. The restaurant was quiet enough to hear one another without feeling like everybody nearby could hear us too. Larry asked for a booth along the side wall, and Cassie slid in beside me while her parents sat across from us. We ordered drinks and spent the first few minutes talking about the flight, the heat, and Angel's packing. Larry warned me that renting the Suburban might have encouraged her.

"She's going to start trying to bring all her furniture with all that space."

"I told her we have baggage limits."

He nodded.

"She heard you. That's different from accepting the fact."

Cassie smiled into her water glass.

Then the server took our food orders and walked away.

Maria folded her hands on the table.

"How is Katarina?"

"She's good," I said. "Busy at the store. She wanted to come, but we couldn't all leave at once."

"I spoke with Lillian directly."

Cassie looked up.

"When?"

"Recently."

I knew from Kat that her mother had come by after we left. I hadn't known what had prompted the visit. Cassie's posture changed beside me.

"Mom."

"I was concerned."

"So, you called her mother?"

"Cassie," I said softly.

She looked at me. I kept my hand against hers and waited. I didn't want to interrupt her. I just wanted her to know I was there. Maria looked down at the table.

"I know Katarina is an adult. I know you are too."

"Then talk to us like we are," Cassie said. "Please."

Maria nodded once.

"All right."

Larry looked at me.

"That's part of why we agreed to get dinner. We've heard from Cassie. We'd like to hear from you."

"Fair enough. But there's something I want to say first."

Cassie looked toward me. I kept my hand in hers.

"I know what was said when you found out about us."

Maria's expression tightened.

"I apologized to my daughter."

"I know. She told me that too."

"Then..."

"But she's still hurting over it. So, before we spend dinner talking about whether I respect your daughter, I need you to know that hearing she'd been called a slut in her own home bothered the hell out of me."

The table went quiet.

I could feel Cassie watching me.

"You're worried about her. I understand that. Ask me difficult questions. Tell me you don't trust me yet. I can work with that. But Cassie hasn't done anything that makes her deserve to be spoken to that way."

Maria glanced at her daughter.

"I was upset."

"I believe you, but that certainly isn't an excuse, Maria. I'm upset about what happened to her, and I'm still carefully choosing how I speak to you."

Larry lowered his eyes briefly. Maria held mine. I let the silence sit for a second before continuing.

"I didn't come here to pick a fight. Cassie wants you in her life, and I want this to go well. But I love her. I'm not going to sit beside her and act like that didn't matter."

Cassie's fingers tightened around mine.

"It mattered," she said quietly. "And I don't want it happening again."

Maria looked at her.

"It won't."

Cassie nodded, though her shoulders hadn't quite relaxed.

"Okay."

Larry took a slow breath, then looked back at me.

"All right. Then let me ask you directly. What are your intentions with our daughter?"

I met his eyes.

"I love her. I intend to keep building a life with her."

Maria took a breath through her nose.

"And you're married."

"Yes."

"To her best friend."

"Yes."

"You can understand why that answer doesn't reassure us very much," Larry said.

"I can."

He waited.

"Kat and I are married. I love my wife, and I'm committed to her. Cassie knows that. She also knows I love her. We talked about what we were doing before we decided to be together."

"Did you want this?" Maria asked.

"Yes."

"Or did Katarina want it?"

"She wanted it too."

"Who brought it up?"

"Kat helped us start talking honestly about it. But she didn't decide how Cassie or I felt. By then, those feelings were already there."

Cassie looked across the table.

"Mine were."

Maria's eyes moved to her.

"I know that's what you've told me."

"It's what happened, Mom."

Larry tapped one finger against his water glass.

"I'm going to be direct."

"Please."

"You're a young man with a beautiful wife and another beautiful woman telling you she loves you. I'm sure there are parts of this arrangement that appeal to you."

Cassie opened her mouth. I rubbed my thumb over her hand.

"There are," I said. "I'm in love with your daughter, Larry. I'm hardly going to argue that being with her is a hardship."

He almost smiled.

"But if you're asking whether I'm enjoying myself while she does all the compromising, the answer is no. I'm responsible for what I bring to this relationship too."

"And what is that?" Maria asked.

"My time. My commitment. Being somebody she can depend on. And listening when she tells me I've gotten something wrong."

"Nor would I be agreeing to this if all I got was a good time," Cassie said.

I glanced at her.

"I do try to provide that too."

She gave me a small, hesitant but not unwilling smile.

"Behave, Papi."

"Doing my best."

Larry shook his head slightly, but some of the tension had left his expression. Then he looked at her.

"I know, kiddo," he said, talking past what I said.

"What does that mean?" Maria asked me. "Because Cassie says she has a life with you, but I don't know what she means by that."

"She lives with us. We spend time together. We make plans together. If something matters to her, it matters to me."

"That could describe a roommate."

I nodded.

"It could. It could describe a marriage too, if somebody left enough out."

Maria looked at me more closely. I continued before the answer could sound like I was being clever at her expense.

"Most of what we do would probably seem pretty ordinary to you. She tells me about work. I tell her about mine. We make dinner. Sometimes we go out, sometimes we stay home. I know when she's upset even if she's trying to joke her way through it. I know she'll spend half a day solving everybody else's problems and forget she hasn't eaten."

Cassie glanced at me.

"I've gotten better."

"You have."

"You make me sound like I can't take care of myself."

"I know you can. I still like taking care of you sometimes."

Her expression softened a little. Larry smiled faintly. I looked back at him.

"I love being with her. That's true when we're having a good time, and it's true when she's tired and doesn't want to do anything except sit beside me. I didn't come here because it sounded fun. I came because this matters to her."

Maria looked at our joined hands.

"Do you spend time with her alone?"

"Yes."

"Without Katarina?"

"Yes. Cassie and I go out together. We have time at home together. So do she and Kat."

That seemed to trouble her in a different way.

"And your wife is comfortable with that?"

"She is. She's encouraged it."

"I don't understand how."

"I know. It took us some talking to figure out what we wanted too."

"I don't understand how she can love you and want that."

"Because she loves me too," Cassie said.

Maria looked at her. Cassie's voice stayed steady.

"You keep trying to understand this as something happening to Kat. It's her relationship too."

Our food arrived then. Everybody moved their glasses and thanked the server, and for a minute we had something else to do. I was glad for the break. Cassie picked up her fork, then put it down again. I glanced at her, but before I could say anything, she picked it back up.

"Yes, Papi. I'm eating."

"I didn't say a word."

"You were thinking loudly."

Larry let out a quiet laugh. For a little while, we actually ate. Larry asked about teaching and coaching, and I told him how things were going at Stonebridge. He asked a couple of questions about my knee, then about Hearthstone.

"You're doing quite a few things."

"I've got good people around me."

"And you can make time for all this?"

"For Cassie?"

"For two relationships."

I set my fork down.

"I have to be deliberate about it. Sometimes our schedules are a pain in the ass. Sometimes one of us needs more time or attention than the others. We talk about it. Saul still handles most of Hearthstone's day-to-day business. I've been spending more time there during the summer while the girls are at work."

"And if Cassie needs you while Kat needs you?"

"Then I have to figure out what each of them needs. I don't have a rule that says Cassie waits because Kat is my wife."

"But your wife comes first," Maria said.

Cassie went still.

"I love my wife," I said. "That doesn't make Cassie somebody I get around to when I'm finished being married."

Maria's eyes narrowed slightly.

"That isn't what I asked."

"You're asking whether she'll always be second. No. I won't treat her that way."

"But when they both need you?"

"Then I find out what's happening and do my best to be where I'm needed. If Kat's having a bad day and Cassie's in trouble, I go to Cassie. Being married doesn't make every need Kat has more important."

"And Katarina accepts that?"

"Yes. She loves Cassie. She wouldn't want me ignoring her either."

I looked at Cassie before turning back to Maria.

"They each have a relationship with me. They also have one with each other. You keep asking where Cassie fits as though Kat and I haven't made room for her. We have. More importantly, she's had a say in what that looks like."

"I chose it too, Mom," Cassie said. "You have to leave room for that when you ask these questions."

Maria listened.

"I can't promise I'll always get it right," I added. "But I won't dismiss what Cassie needs because of who I married."

Larry studied me.

"What happens when she wants something you can't give her?"

"I have to be honest about that too."

"Even if it costs you this relationship?"

"Yes."

Cassie turned toward me. I looked at her.

"I want you with me because you want to be there. You know that."

"I do."

I kissed the back of her hand, then looked across the table again.

"If she wants a different life someday, I'll have to accept that. I'd hate it. But loving her doesn't mean I get to decide what she should be willing to live without."

Larry was quiet for a moment. Then he said, "That's one of the things I've been worried about."

"I figured."

"She's good at making things work for other people."

"I know."

Cassie frowned.

"I'm sitting right here."

He looked at her.

"I know you are, kiddo. I'm allowed to know things about you."

"You are. But I'm allowed to know what I want too."

Larry nodded slowly.

"Yes, you are."

She glanced between us.

"Good. Just making sure we all remember that."

That eased something. Larry smiled, and Cassie ate a little more.

Maria hadn't touched much of her dinner.

"What about children?"

Cassie looked at me, then back at her mother.

"We've talked about that."

Maria's expression sharpened.

"Have you?"

"Yes," I said. "We all want them someday."

"And Cassie would do what? Help raise yours?"

"If Kat and I have a child, Cassie wants to be part of raising that child. If Cassie and I have a child, Kat wants to be part of raising them too. We've talked about doing it together."

Maria stared at me.

"You would have a child with my daughter while married to Katarina."

"If that's what Cassie and I decide we want, yes."

"And Katarina knows this?"

"Yes."

Larry put his fork down.

"That's a much bigger commitment than dating."

"It is."

"Have you thought about what it would actually involve?"

"We've started. I won't tell you we have every practical detail worked out. We don't. But it's something we've talked about seriously."

"And you wouldn't expect Cassie to handle it while you went back to your wife?" Maria asked.

"No."

The answer came out firmly enough that she stopped.

I set my fork down.

"I know you're trying to protect her. But you've asked me a few different ways whether I'd leave her alone when being with her became inconvenient. The answer is still no."

"You can say that now."

"Yes. And you can decide whether you believe me. But if Cassie and I have a child, I'm their father. I don't stop being their father when Kat calls."

Larry watched me closely.

"I'd be there for the appointments, the sleepless nights, the diapers. The ordinary things and the difficult things. We've talked about raising our children together. I mean that."

Cassie's hand settled on my thigh.

"Kat and I have talked about it too," she said. "About what we'd want from each other. It isn't just something Robbie's promising."

Maria looked at her.

"And you want that?"

"Yes, Mom. I want a family with them."

I nodded.

"And I'd be their father. I'd be there."

Larry nodded slowly, but he wasn't finished.

"She doesn't have the same protection your wife has."

"I know."

"Living in your house isn't the same as owning it."

"No, it isn't."

"And if this ends?"

"She still owns her half of The Bowery. That doesn't change. She has her own money, and I won't use where she lives to pressure her into staying with me."

"Robbie," Cassie said quietly.

I turned toward her.

"I know you wouldn't."

"I'm glad."

Larry looked at his daughter, then back at me.

"Knowing somebody wouldn't do something and having protection if they do are different things."

"You're right."

That seemed to surprise him.

I continued.

"If we're making long-term commitments, we need to deal with the practical side. Especially before children. I'm willing to do that. I'm not asking Cassie to trust me so we never have to put anything in writing."

Cassie nodded.

"We can love each other and still make sure we're protected. Mom helped us do that with the store."

She meant Lillian. Maria seemed to realize it a second after I did. Larry sat back. For the first time since we'd sat down, I felt like we'd answered something he'd actually been carrying around. Maria pushed her plate a little farther away.

"You speak very well."

I wasn't entirely sure it was a compliment.

"Thank you."

"Cassie has always been impressed by that."

"Mom."

"I'm saying he knows what to say."

Cassie's jaw tightened. I kept my eyes on Maria.

"You're right. I've had time to think about this conversation. I knew you'd want answers, and I wanted to give you good ones."

Maria looked at me.

"But I can't prove everything over dinner," I added. "You'll have to see how I treat her. I'd like the chance to let you."

"And when you're tired of this?"

I looked at Maria for a moment. Cassie's hand had gone still in mine. She felt the tension in me. I understood her worry, as I knew she would have no idea how I would react under these circumstances. I took a deep breath while concentrating on keeping my face composed.

"I need you to hear how that sounds with her sitting here," I said, a slight but definite edge in my voice.

Maria glanced toward her daughter.

"I'm asking a reasonable question."

"You can ask what happens if our relationship ends. Larry already has, and I've answered him. But asking when I'll get tired of her assumes she's temporary, that she's some toy I'll get bored with, all while we have been telling you explicitly that there is no indication of that."

"That isn't what I meant."

"Then ask me what you mean and I'll answer you."

Larry stayed quiet. Cassie shifted closer beside me. Maria looked down at her hands.

"I'm afraid she'll build her whole future around you, and you'll decide you already have everything you need with Katarina."

That was different. I could answer that.

"I understand why that scares you," I said. "But I already have a life with Kat. I had that before Cassie and I got together. I'm here because I want a life with Cassie too."

I looked at her daughter.

"I don't think of you as something I'm trying out."

"I know, Papi."

When I turned back, Maria was watching us.

"I can't guarantee we'll never have problems," I told her. "But I'm serious about her. I need you to stop treating that like the one answer I can't possibly mean."

Maria's eyes had started to shine.

"That sounds very reasonable."

"But?"

She looked down at the cross resting against her chest.

"But I still hear a man telling me he loves my daughter while his wedding ring is on his hand."

I glanced at the ring. I had no intention of taking it off to make the conversation easier.

"I understand."

"I don't think you do."

"Then tell me."

She took a slow breath.

"I have believed certain things all my life. About marriage. About family. I raised my daughters to believe them too. I can't look at this and say it's right because everybody agrees."

Cassie looked down at her plate.

Maria continued.

"I have prayed about it. I have tried to understand what she tells me. And every time I think perhaps I can listen, I come back to the same thing."

"That I'm doing something wrong," Cassie said.

Maria's face tightened.

"Yes."

Larry reached for his water, then set it down without drinking. Nobody spoke for a moment. I turned slightly toward Cassie. Her eyes were wet, but she held her mother's gaze. Maria saw it.

"I don't want to hurt you."

"I know, Mom. But you have."

"I know."

Cassie swallowed.

"I wanted to call you so many times."

Maria's mouth trembled.

"Then why didn't you?"

"Because I didn't know if I'd get my mom or another conversation about what was wrong with me. And I couldn't stop thinking about what you called me."

Larry looked down.

Maria closed her eyes briefly. When she opened them, she was looking at her daughter.

"I missed you too. I just didn't know what to say."

"You could've asked about work. Or Lady. Or if I was eating enough. Dad's pretty good at that one."

Larry's expression softened, but Maria didn't smile.

"I was afraid that if I acted like everything was normal, you would think I had changed my mind."

Cassie looked at her for a long moment.

"So, we just didn't talk."

Maria's eyes filled.

"Yes."

I wanted to say something. Mostly, I wanted to make the look on Cassie's face go away. But this part wasn't mine to answer for her. Larry broke the silence.

"I don't really understand this, Robbie."

I looked at him.

"I know."

"I don't know that I ever will. I don't think I could do it."

"I'm not asking you to."

He nodded.

"But you came here. You've answered some uncomfortable questions without making us feel stupid for asking them."

"They're fair questions."

"Most of them."

Cassie let out a small breath that might have been a laugh.

Larry looked at our hands again.

"And I can see that you care about her."

"I do."

He turned toward Cassie.

"I believe you're happy, kiddo. I'm going to try to stop treating that like something you need to defend every time we talk."

Her eyes lifted to his.

"Thank you, Papa."

"I'll still worry."

"I would be concerned if you didn't."

He smiled faintly. Then Maria reached across the table. Cassie looked at her hand before taking it.

"I'm sorry," Maria said.

Cassie's lips pressed together.

"For more than what I said that day. For making you feel you couldn't call me."

"Thank you."

Maria rubbed her thumb over Cassie's knuckles.

"I can see how you look at him."

Cassie glanced at me.

"And I've watched him look at you tonight," Maria continued. "I don't think that part is an act he's putting on."

"It isn't," Cassie said.

Maria nodded, tears slipping down her cheeks now.

"I don't know how to make it fit with what I believe."

Cassie reached for a napkin and handed it to her.

"You don't have to figure it all out tonight."

"I need you to be patient with me."

"I can be patient."

Maria looked at her.

"But you have to talk to me," Cassie said. "And you have to listen when I tell you about my life. Even the parts you don't like."

"I will try."

"And Kat is part of that life too."

Maria hesitated.

I was glad Cassie had said it. It would have been easy to let the conversation end with Maria accepting the part that looked most familiar and leaving Kat out of it.

"I know," Maria said at last.

Cassie nodded.

Maria looked toward me.

"I don't want to lose my daughter."

I felt Cassie's fingers tighten around mine again.

"She wants you in her life," I said. "That's why she asked us all to do this."

Maria looked back at Cassie.

"I would like you to call me."

Cassie laughed softly through her own tears.

"Okay, Mama."

"Even if nothing important has happened."

"Okay, Mama. I will."

We hadn't fixed everything. Maria still looked conflicted when her eyes moved toward my wedding ring. Larry still had questions he clearly intended to ask another day. But Cassie was holding her mother's hand. That was a pretty good place to start. We stayed for coffee after the plates were cleared. The conversation became easier without becoming entirely comfortable.

Maria asked about The Bowery, and Cassie told her about the events they had coming up. Larry asked another question about Angel's internship. I answered what I could, then told him Angel would be better at explaining the rest.

"She seems excited," he said.

"She is."

"I'd like her to finish school."

"So would we. Saul's arranging the hours around her classes. If she likes the work and does well, there could be something more permanent after graduation. Right now, we want her to finish and see how she likes it."

Maria listened as Cassie described something Kat had done at the store. She didn't interrupt or change the subject. I noticed Cassie noticing. When the check came, Larry reached for it.

"I invited you," Cassie said.

"And I'm paying."

"Dad."

He gave her a look. I kept my hands where he could see them.

"I know when I'm outmatched, but I will insist on leaving the tip."

Larry smiled at me.

"Very well."

Outside, Maria hugged Cassie before we went to the car. There was less hesitation this time. Then she turned toward me.

"Thank you for coming."

"Thank you for talking with me."

She nodded. I didn't reach for a hug. She didn't offer one. But when I opened the passenger door for Cassie, Maria watched her daughter smile at me, and her expression softened. On the way back to the house, Larry told me which turn to take even though the navigation was already telling me. Cassie caught my eye. I kept my mouth shut. I knew when I was outmatched twice in one evening.

Angel had managed to cover most of the floor of her bedroom by the time we got back. There were two open suitcases on the bed, a duffel near the door, and three separate piles of clothes whose purpose was not immediately obvious. Cassie stopped in the doorway.

"What the fuck happened?"

"Organization."

"Is that what you call this?"

Angel looked past her at me.

"How was dinner?"

"Good," Cassie said.

Angel studied her face.

"Actually good?"

Cassie nodded.

"Actually good."

Some of the tension left Angel's shoulders.

"Okay."

She went over and hugged her sister. Cassie held her for a second, then stepped back and looked at the bed. For the next hour, we sorted, folded, rearranged, and argued about how much could reasonably fit in the bags. Cassie was particularly invested in a sweater she claimed Angel had stolen years ago.

I had come to terms with the fact that I was going to be paying extra for some of these bags, even if Angel didn't realize it yet. Maria came in with a small bag of things Angel had forgotten in the bathroom. At one point, Cassie was sitting cross-legged on the floor, sorting through a stack of papers, when she held up an old photograph.

The picture showed the two of them much younger, grinning beside a birthday cake. Cassie's red hair was pulled into two crooked ponytails. Angel appeared to have icing on her forehead. I picked up another stack of clothes and let them talk, trying very much to just let them have their time. By the time we finished for the evening, Angel had made enough compromises to close both suitcases without anybody sitting on them. I considered that a victory.

She still had things to sort through the next day, but at least the floor was visible again. I carried the packed bags downstairs while Larry held the front door. Outside, he helped me load them into the Suburban. For a minute, it was just the two of us.

He closed the back hatch, then looked at me.

"You did all right tonight."

"Thanks."

"I wasn't trying to make it easy."

"I noticed."

He smiled a little, then grew serious again.

"She loves hard."

I glanced toward the house. Through the open door, I could see Cassie standing beside her mother.

"I know."

"Don't take advantage of that."

"I wouldn't dream of it."

He held my gaze for a moment, then nodded and offered his hand.

I shook it. When we went back inside, Maria was telling Angel to make a list of everything she still needed to do.

"Mom, we have all day tomorrow."

"And then tomorrow you'll tell me you're leaving the next day."

Angel looked at me as if she wanted a witness. I declined to get involved. Cassie hugged her dad, then her mom. Maria kissed her cheek and held her face briefly between her hands.

"We'll see you tomorrow?"

Cassie nodded.

"Yeah. We'll call in the morning."

"All right, mija."

On the drive back to the hotel, Angel did most of the talking. She told us which things she'd decided to leave, which things she'd forgotten she owned, and why Cassie was absolutely wrong about the sweater. Cassie answered, but she kept one hand on my leg the entire way.

Back at the hotel, Angel disappeared into her room after announcing that she was finished making decisions for the day and needed sleep. Cassie and I called Kat from the couch.

"How did it go?" she asked as soon as she answered.

Cassie let out a breath.

"Better than I thought."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. Dad's trying. Mom said she wants me to call her more."

Kat's face softened.

"Oh, Honey."

Cassie nodded, looking down at her hand in mine.

"She's still having a hard time with it."

"I figured."

"But she listened. Mostly. And Robbie was..." Cassie looked up at me. "Robbie."

Kat smiled.

"That usually helps."

"He helped a lot."

"She did the hard part," I said.

Cassie looked at me.

"You did, Chica. You told her what you needed. I couldn't do that for you."

Kat nodded.

"I'm proud of you, Honey."

Cassie looked down for a second, smiling faintly.

"Thank you, my sweet."

I shook my head.

"They had a lot of questions."

"I bet they did."

"Your mother was mentioned."

Kat's expression changed slightly.

"I was going to tell you about that."

"It's okay, babe. We can talk about it when we get home."

She nodded. We stayed on the phone for a little while. Cassie told her about Angel's packing, and Kat told us about the store and held the phone down so we could see Lady.

Lady heard my voice, lifted her head, then walked over to investigate the screen.

"Hey, baby girl."

Her tail started moving.

Cassie leaned closer.

"Oh, now she's interested."

"She's been lying on your side of the bed," Kat told me.

"Good. Somebody's looking after you."

Kat smiled. We told her we loved her before hanging up. Then Cassie set the phone on the table and leaned into me. I put my arm around her. For a while, she didn't say anything. I let her have the quiet. Eventually, she turned her face toward my chest.

"I missed her so much."

I kissed the top of her head.

"I know."

"I was so fucking mad at her. I still am about some of it."

"That's okay."

"She hugged me, and all I could think was that I wanted my mom."

Her voice broke on the last word.

I held her closer while she cried. There wasn't much of it. A few tears, a shaky breath, her fingers curling into my shirt. But she'd been holding herself together all evening, and I was glad she didn't feel like she had to keep doing it. When she finally lifted her head, I brushed my thumb beneath her eye.

"Hey, Mi Vida."

She laughed softly.

"Hey, Papi."

"You good?"

"Getting there."

I kissed her forehead. She looked at me for a long moment.

"You really meant everything you said?"

"Every word."

"Even the part about if I wanted something different someday?"

That one hurt a little.

"Yes."

She touched my cheek.

"I don't."

I turned my head and kissed her palm.

"I'm glad."

"I want you. I want Kat. I want our ridiculous house and our dog and you showing up at work to bully me into eating lunch."

"I thought you were getting better at that."

"I am. Don't get distracted."

I smiled.

She leaned closer.

"I want the life we're making."

"So do I."

Her mouth met mine. The kiss was slow, her hand settling against the back of my neck. I offered no resistance when she drew herself onto my lap, her knees on either side of me. When she pulled back, she rested her forehead against mine.

"Thank you for being here."

"Always glad to be where you are, Chica."

Her fingers moved into my hair.

"You're very good at this."

"At what?"

"Making it difficult to remain emotionally composed."

I laughed, and she kissed me again.

"I would like to point out, you were the one who crawled on top of me."

"I plead the Fifth."

She stood and led me to bed, where we got into the same position. She kissed me again, with more intention. This time, she wasn't trying to forget dinner. Every once in a while, she would pause and look at me, her fingers moving gently over my face before she kissed me again.

I liked being looked at that way. I liked knowing she felt safe enough to let me see how much the day had affected her. We made love passionately but quietly, aware of Angel in the other room. Afterward, Cassie curled against me with her head on my chest, and I traced my fingers slowly along her back.

The other side of the bed felt strange without Kat in it. I missed her. But Cassie was warm against me, finally relaxed, and I was glad I'd come. Just before she fell asleep, she tilted her face toward mine.

"Love you, Papi."

I kissed her.

"Love you too, Mi Vida."

The next morning, Cassie's phone rang while I was getting dressed. She looked at the screen, then sat up a little straighter against the pillows.

"Hi, Mom."

I kept pulling on my shirt.

"No, we're awake."

She glanced at me.

"Well, one of us is. The other one has a very loose interpretation of vacation."

"I heard that."

She smiled.

Maria spoke for a while. I couldn't hear what she was saying, but I watched Cassie's expression change.

"Yeah. We'd like that."

Another pause.

"Okay. Give us a little while to get everybody ready."

When she hung up, she sat looking at her phone.

"You good?"

She nodded.

"She wanted to know if we'd come over for breakfast."

"Okay."

"All three of us."

I smiled.

"Then we should probably wake up your sister."

Cassie looked toward the door.

"You do it. I want her to still like me."

Angel was already awake, which was fortunate for everybody involved. We got ready and headed over. The house smelled like coffee and breakfast when Larry let us in. Maria was at the stove, and there were plates already set out on the kitchen table. She greeted Cassie with a kiss on the cheek, then told Angel to get the juice out of the refrigerator.

"Good morning, Robbie."

"Morning, Maria. Thank you for having me."

She nodded toward the coffeepot.

"Help yourself."

It wasn't a dramatic change. She didn't hug me or tell me she'd spent the night reconsidering everything she believed. But there was a place set for me, and she asked how I liked my eggs. I could work with that.

Breakfast was easier than dinner had been. Larry complained about a neighbor who had decided the entire street needed to hear his motorcycle every morning. Cassie knew exactly who he meant. Angel insisted he'd always been like that. Maria asked about an event at The Bowery that Cassie had mentioned the night before.

Cassie started answering, then got caught up telling her about something funny Kat had said while they were planning it. She stopped briefly when she realized whose name she'd brought into the conversation.

Maria noticed.

"What did she say?"

Cassie looked at her and smiled. Then she told the rest of the story. I took another drink of coffee and let myself relax. After breakfast, Angel had a few errands she wanted to take care of. There were things to drop off, a package to mail, and a stop at a store for another bag that I felt we all should have anticipated.

Larry came with us while Maria and Cassie stayed behind. As we headed toward the door, Cassie caught my hand.

"You okay with that?"

"Of course, Mi Vida."

She glanced toward the kitchen, where her mother was clearing the last of the dishes.

"I think I want a little time with her."

"Take it."

She kissed me before letting go.

The errands took most of the morning. Angel spent a surprising amount of time deciding what size bag to buy, considering she had already demonstrated that whatever she chose would be too small. Larry watched her compare two of them.

"Buy the bigger one."

"It costs more."

"So does checking three smaller ones."

She looked at me. I raised both hands.

"I'm staying out of it."

"Coward."

"Nope, I just don't have a horse in this race."

Larry laughed.

On the way back, Angel talked more about the internship and her plans for school. Larry asked questions, but the conversation felt different from the one in the kitchen the day before. He was helping her think things through instead of trying to find the reason she shouldn't go.

When we got back to the house, Cassie and Maria were sitting at the kitchen table with an old photo album between them. Cassie looked up when I came in. Her eyes were a little red, but she smiled. I went over and kissed the top of her head.

"Everything good?"

"Yeah, Papi."

Maria turned the album slightly so I could see the picture they'd been looking at. Cassie was younger, standing beside Kat. Both of them were dressed up and grinning at whoever was taking the picture.

I leaned down for a closer look.

"Oh, I need a copy of that."

Cassie groaned.

"No."

"Absolutely."

"You have enough pictures."

"Apparently not."

Maria smiled down at the page.

"I think I have another one somewhere."

Cassie looked between us.

"Great. This is going to become a problem."

We spent the afternoon finishing Angel's packing. Some things she wanted to keep were going into storage at her parents' house. A few others were being mailed so we didn't have to carry them through the airport.

Larry and I moved a couple of boxes while the girls sorted through the last of her room. Maria checked on them occasionally, offering suggestions that were accepted about half the time. It was ordinary family shit. Somebody couldn't find tape. Somebody else had put the scissors somewhere stupid. Angel swore she needed something she hadn't remembered owning until ten minutes earlier.

I liked seeing Cassie in the middle of it.

She argued with her sister. She teased her dad. Once, Maria touched her shoulder while passing behind her, and Cassie reached up to squeeze her hand without stopping what she was saying. Nothing had become simple overnight. But they were finding ways to be around each other again.

By late afternoon, we'd done enough that Angel could actually leave without abandoning anything important. We took a break back at the hotel, then went out for a casual dinner with all five of us. Angel did most of the talking that time.

I was pretty sure she'd been saving up everything she hadn't said during the first dinner.

Larry asked about Hearthstone again, then about wrestling. Maria asked what I taught. When I answered, she asked another question.

For the first time since we'd arrived, I felt like she was trying to know me as somebody other than the married man involved with her daughter. I appreciated it.

Later, after we said goodnight and went back to the hotel, Cassie and I called Kat again. She answered from the couch with Lady beside her.

"You look tired, babe."

"Long day."

"Everything okay?"

"Yeah. I'm just glad you're coming home tomorrow."

"So are we, my sweet," Cassie said.

We told her about breakfast and the rest of the day. Kat smiled when Cassie said her mother had asked questions about the store.

"That's good, Honey."

"Yeah. It was."

We didn't stay on long. Kat looked ready to fall asleep, and all of us were worn out too. After we hung up, Cassie set the phone down and leaned against me.

"What did you and your mom talk about this morning?" I asked.

She took a breath.

"A lot."

"You don't have to tell me all of it."

"I know." She looked up at me. "She's still worried. But she asked me what I wanted her to understand instead of her telling me what I needed to understand."

"That sounds good."

"It was."

She rested her hand against my chest.

"I told her about you and Kat. About how we actually live. I think she needed to hear some of it without feeling like she was arguing with you."

"I'm glad you had the time."

"Me too."

She was quiet for a little while. Then she smiled.

"She also told me you're very handsome."

"Oh?"

"Don't get excited. She said it like it was one more thing she found suspicious."

I laughed. Cassie kissed my shoulder.

"She'll get there."

"I hope so."

"I think she wants to."

That was enough for the moment.

The next morning, we had breakfast downstairs before Cassie and Angel took the Suburban to their parents' house. I'd offered to go if they wanted me. Cassie shook her head.

"I think we need some time with just them. To say goodbye."

"All right."

Angel picked up the keys.

"And I need to check the bathroom one more time, apparently."

"Apparently."

Cassie stopped beside my chair and leaned down to kiss me.

"We'll be back before checkout."

"Take your time. I can get everything ready here, and I got the late checkout, so we've got some time."

She brushed her fingers through the back of my hair.

"Thanks, Papi."

I watched them leave, then went upstairs.

There wasn't much to pack. I checked the drawers, gathered the chargers, and made sure Angel hadn't left anything in her room. Afterward, I answered a couple of emails and spoke briefly with Saul about something he wanted me to look over when I got back.

Then I sent Kat a message.

Me: Girls are with their parents. Should be heading to the airport in a few hours. Miss you, babe.

Her: Miss you too, baby. Have a safe flight. Love you.

I smiled at the phone, then set it aside. Cassie and Angel came back just before noon. Angel had another small bag. Of course she did. Cassie kissed me, then wrapped her arms around my waist. I held her.

"How was it?"

"Good."

I waited.

"Mom cried. Angel cried. Dad pretended he wasn't crying."

"Sounds about right."

She laughed against my chest. Then she looked up.

"Mom asked me to call when we get home."

"Good."

"And she said to tell you thank you."

I brushed my hand along her back.

"I'm glad we went."

"Me too."

We loaded the last of the bags, checked out, and found somewhere to have lunch before heading toward the airport. Angel was quieter on the drive. Cassie turned in her seat to check on her once, and her sister gave her a small smile.

"I'm okay."

"I know, Manita."

"I'm excited."

"You're allowed to miss them too."

Angel nodded and looked out the window. I left them to it. Returning the car was easy. Getting the luggage from the rental center to the terminal was less so, but we managed. Angel watched the last suitcase disappear onto the belt with the expression of someone who had entrusted a very important part of herself to strangers.

Cassie touched her shoulder.

"Your shoes will survive."

"You don't know that."

"I'm willing to be hopeful."

By the time we boarded that evening, all three of us were ready to sit down and stop carrying things. Cassie took the seat beside the window. Angel settled across the aisle with her headphones, and I lowered myself into the seat beside Cassie. She smiled and took my hand.

As the plane lifted off, she watched Arizona fall away beneath us. I could see the last light catching the side of her face. After a few minutes, she leaned against my shoulder.

"What are you thinking?" she asked.

"That I'm glad we booked first class." She laughed as I stretched out. "And that I'm glad I came," I added.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

She nodded.

"I'm glad we're going home."

I kissed the top of her head.

"Me too, Chica."

Her fingers tightened around mine before she settled closer. Across the aisle, Angel closed her eyes. Cassie stayed against me while I looked through the movies on the screen, then stopped on one I knew she liked.

She glanced up.

"I've seen that."

"I know."

She smiled, kissed my shoulder, and turned toward the screen. I kept her hand in mine as we headed home to Kat.

It was late by the time we landed, and all three of us were ready to be done traveling. We made it off the plane and through the terminal as quickly as we could. Kat was waiting by baggage claim.

She smiled as we approached, wrapped her arms around my waist, and kissed me softly. I held her a little longer than I usually would in the middle of an airport.

"Hey, baby."

"Hey."

Her hand rested against my chest.

"Missed you."

"Missed you too, babe."

I noticed that her kiss tasted faintly of toothpaste, and when she pulled back, she looked tired enough that I wished we'd told her to stay home and let us get a ride.

Cassie came up and kissed her too.

"You okay, my sweet?"

Kat nodded.

"Just tired. I'm glad you're home."

Angel hugged her while Cassie and I started watching for the bags. Thankfully, we got a cart for all of Angel's stuff, and Kat had brought my truck, so there was room for everything. I took the keys from her.

"You're done driving tonight."

She didn't argue. The ride home was oddly quiet. Kat asked Cassie and Angel how everything had gone, listening while Cassie told her about saying goodbye.

Not long after that, she fell asleep beside me. At a stoplight, I glanced over at her. Her head rested against the seat, one hand loose in her lap. Cassie noticed too.

"Long couple days," she said softly.

"Yeah."

I turned the music down a little. When we got home, Lady made it very clear that our absence had been unacceptable. I crouched to greet her while she tried to climb into my lap, then stepped aside so Cassie could receive the same enthusiastic complaint.

Kat stood nearby, smiling faintly.

We carried Angel's bags out to the pool house and left her to settle in. The actual unpacking could wait. She looked around the room for a moment before turning back toward us.

"Home," Cassie said.

Angel smiled.

"Yeah."

Cassie hugged her. We told her goodnight, then went back into the house. I was hungry again despite the hour, and Cassie was looking through the fridge while I got Lady some fresh water.

"We could just make frozen pizza," I said.

Cassie glanced toward the refrigerator.

"I could be convinced."

Kat came into the kitchen. She had changed into something more comfortable, but she still looked pale and tired. She stood on the other side of the island for a second, watching us.

"Baby?" I asked.

She looked at me, then at Cassie.

"Can we talk about something important?"

Cassie put her phone down immediately.

"Of course, my sweet."

I set the glass I'd been holding on the counter.

"What's going on?"

Kat stepped closer. Her hands were trembling a little. Then she placed three pregnancy tests on the island and looked at us.

Kat's POV

Neither of them said anything. For a second, the only sound in the kitchen was Lady drinking from the bowl Robbie had just filled.

I had imagined this moment several times over the last two days. Usually, I managed to get further than standing in front of them with three pregnancy tests and absolutely no idea what to say. Cassie looked at the tests, then at me.

"Kat...?"

I nodded.

Her eyes went back to the counter.

"All three?"

"Yeah."

Robbie hadn't moved. He was looking at the tests like somebody had put them there and asked him to solve a problem in a language he didn't speak. I swallowed.

"I took the first one yesterday morning. Then another one because I thought maybe I'd done it wrong. And the third one this morning."

Cassie picked one up carefully.

"Holy shit."

"Yeah."

She looked at me again. Her mouth opened, then closed. I couldn't tell what she was thinking, and that was starting to scare me.

"I know we said someday," I said. "I didn't know someday was already happening!"

Cassie let out a shaky little laugh. Then her face changed.

"Oh, my God."

Her eyes filled, and she smiled.

"Kat."

That was all she said before she came around the island and wrapped her arms around me. I held on to her immediately.

"Oh, my God, my sweet."

I laughed, but it caught in my throat.

"Are you okay with this, Cass?"

She pulled back enough to look at me.

"Honey, are you okay with this?"

"Yeah." I nodded, feeling my own eyes start to burn. "I'm scared, but yeah. I think I'm really happy."

Her smile got bigger.

"Then I'm really happy."

She hugged me again, and something in my chest finally loosened. Over her shoulder, I looked at Robbie. He was still standing on the other side of the island.

"Baby?"

His eyes lifted to mine.

"You're... pregnant."

It wasn't a question.

"Yeah."

He looked down at the tests again. Then at my stomach. Then back at me.

"I'm going to be a... to be a... a dad."

The way he said it made my throat tighten. Quiet. Almost to himself. Cassie stepped back a little, keeping one hand on my arm.

"Papi?"

He rubbed a hand over his mouth.

"Sorry. I'm just..."

"You don't have to be sorry," I said.

He shook his head slightly, still looking at me.

"I know what those mean. My brain's just taking a minute."

Cassie laughed softly through her tears.

"That's allowed."

I wanted to go to him. I also wanted him to come to me. I hated that I suddenly didn't know which one to do.

"Are you happy?" I asked.

His expression changed immediately.

"Oh, babe." He came around the island. "Yes."

His hands settled against my face.

"Yes. I am so far beyond happy."

"Because you look a little like you might pass out."

"I might. Separate issue."

I laughed, and then I was crying.

"Fuck."

He pulled me into him.

I buried my face against his chest, holding on while his arms came around me.

"I'm happy," he said again, close to my ear. "I love you. I'm just trying to catch up."

"I know."

Except I hadn't known. Not until he said it. His hand moved slowly over my back. After a moment, he pulled away enough to look at me.

"You've known since yesterday?"

I nodded.

"I wanted to tell you in person. Both of you."

He glanced at Cassie, then back at me.

"Were you here by yourself when you found out?"

"Lady was supervising."

His eyes closed briefly.

"Babe."

"I know. I wanted you here too."

Cassie came closer, resting her hand against my back.

"Have you been feeling like shit?"

"Yeah, I started getting morning sickness."

Robbie looked down at me.

"How sick?"

"Mostly just nausea. I threw up a couple times. And I'm fucking exhausted."

"You should've told us."

"I wanted you to finish the trip. Cassie needed that time with her family, and I wasn't going to tell you something this big over the phone."

Cassie's face softened.

"You wouldn't have ruined anything."

"I know, but I knew I could wait a day or two."

Robbie kissed my forehead.

"Okay."

He didn't sound entirely happy about me being alone for it, but he didn't keep arguing either. His eyes moved toward the tests again. I watched the realization hit him another time. Then he laughed. It was a little disbelieving, a little breathless.

"Holy shit."

"Yeah," Cassie said. "We've established that part."

He looked at her, smiling now.

"We're having a baby."

Her face crumpled into the happiest fucking smile.

"Yeah, Papi."

He reached for her, and she came into us without hesitation. I ended up between them with Robbie's arms around us both and Cassie kissing the side of my head. For a minute, nobody said anything useful. I didn't think any of us could. Eventually, Robbie leaned back and looked at me again.

"Can I..."

His eyes dropped toward my stomach. I smiled through my tears.

"Baby, you've touched me before."

"I know. This feels different."

"It does."

I took his hand and put it against my stomach. There was nothing to feel. I knew that. He knew that. He still looked at his hand like something incredible had just happened. Cassie rested her head against my shoulder.

"Well," she said softly. "Someday really snuck the fuck up on us."

I laughed. Robbie shook his head, smiling at the floor.

"Apparently it does."

We eventually made it to the couch. The frozen pizza stayed in the freezer. Robbie made toast because the thought of melted cheese had started making my stomach turn, and Cassie brought water before sitting beside me. Robbie sat on my other side with a plate balanced on his knee. I ate a piece of toast while both of them tried very hard to act like they weren't watching me eat it.

"I'm pregnant, guys. I haven't forgotten how to chew."

Cassie looked at Robbie.

"She's already mean."

"She was mean before," he said.

I elbowed him.

He kissed my temple.

"See?"

It felt so fucking good to have them home. I hadn't realized how much energy I'd spent keeping myself occupied until I could finally stop. Cassie's legs were tucked beneath her beside mine. Robbie's hand rested on my thigh. Lady had settled on the floor in front of us, satisfied that everybody was where they belonged.

"I made an appointment," I said.

Robbie turned toward me.

"When is it?"

"I called yesterday. They had an opening the morning after tomorrow."

"What time?"

I told him. He nodded immediately.

"I'll take you."

Cassie pointed at him.

"Yes, you will."

He looked at her.

"I just said that."

"And I'm agreeing very firmly."

I smiled. She turned toward me.

"He's going with you the same way he went with me. You're not doing the nervous waiting-room thing by yourself."

"I was going to ask."

"Now you don't have to."

Robbie squeezed my thigh.

"You never have to ask. I want to be there, babe."

I looked at Cassie.

"Do you want to come too?"

Her expression softened.

"I do. But I can cover the store. I feel like these first appointments should just be the two parents involved. You two go, and then you can tell me everything."

"You're sure?"

"Yeah, Honey. I'm sure. When the time comes, Robbie and I will go to our first one just the two of us. After that, we can all decide together who will come to what appointments."

I reached for her hand.

"You can come next time, if you want."

"Oh, I'll want to."

"Okay."

She smiled, then glanced at my stomach.

"Do you have any idea how far along you might be?"

"Not really. My last period was before the honeymoon, but you know how irregular it's been on the pill. I don't want to start guessing and then find out I'm completely wrong."

Robbie's fingers went still against my leg. I looked at him.

"What?"

He shook his head.

"Nothing. Just thinking."

"About?"

He glanced between us.

"I was sitting across from your parents telling them we wanted kids someday."

Cassie stared at him for a second. Then she laughed.

"Yeah. You really were."

"Apparently I should've been more specific."

I leaned against him.

"You didn't know."

"No," he said, looking down at me. "I really didn't."

He kissed me, slowly enough that I forgot what I'd been about to say. When he pulled back, he was smiling.

"I'm glad I know now."

Eventually, we made our way up to bed. I slept better that night than I had since they left. Not perfectly. I woke up once feeling too warm and again because I needed the bathroom. But both times, I came back to bed and found them there. The second time, Robbie stirred as I got under the covers.

"You okay, babe?"

"Yeah."

His arm came around me.

I settled against his chest, and Cassie's hand found mine beneath the sheet. For the first time since I'd seen the result on that first test, I didn't feel like I needed to figure anything out before I could sleep.

The next day felt strange in the best and most distracting ways. Cassie and I went to work. Answered messages. Dealt with things that had seemed important a week earlier and still were important, technically. I just happened to be pregnant while doing them now. Well, pregnant and excited about it more than nervous.

Every time somebody asked how my morning was going, I had to resist the urge to give them a much more interesting answer than they expected. Cassie caught me staring at my computer without doing anything.

"What?"

I looked at her and smiled.

"There's a baby."

Her smile came slowly.

"Yes, there is."

"There is a baby inside me."

"Generally, that is where they start, my sweet."

"Don't be an asshole. I'm having a moment."

She laughed and came around my desk.

"I've been having that same thought about you all morning."

"Really?"

"Yeah."

She leaned against the edge of the desk.

"I was putting an event on the calendar and started wondering how far along you would be by then."

I looked at her. My eyes started burning again.

"Oh, fuck you."

"What did I do?"

"You made it so real."

Her expression softened. She reached for my hand.

"It's real, Honey."

I squeezed her fingers. Neither of us got much work done for the next few minutes.

The morning of the appointment, I changed my shirt three times. Robbie watched from the doorway after the third one.

"Why do you keep changing shirts?"

"I don't know, baby."

"Okay then."

"I know that sounds stupid."

"Not really. It sounds like you're nervous."

I looked at him. He came over and rested his hands against my waist.

"So am I."

That helped more than him telling me there was nothing to worry about would have.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

I put my hands against his chest.

"What if I get there and they tell me I imagined the whole thing?"

He glanced toward the bathroom.

"Then we should buy a lottery ticket. The chances of having 3 false positives are something like 1 in a million. That's why you took 3, babe."

I laughed despite myself. He kissed my forehead.

"We'll find out what's going on. Together."

Cassie was downstairs getting ready to leave when we came down. She handed me a bottle of water and looked at Robbie.

"You're taking notes."

He held up his phone.

"Prepared."

"Actual notes. Not just remembering the exciting parts."

"Yes, ma'am."

She gave him a look. He smiled.

"I've got this, Chica."

"I know."

Cassie hugged me.

"Call me when you're done."

"I will."

"And ask everything you want to ask. Don't decide something's a stupid question and then spend the afternoon worrying about it."

I pulled back.

"You know me too well."

"Tragic, really."

She kissed me softly, then looked down at my stomach with a smile she didn't quite manage to hide. She went over and kissed Robbie goodbye.

"Okay. Go. Before I start crying in the kitchen again."

With that, we left. The waiting room was full of women who seemed much more qualified to be there than I felt. Some were visibly pregnant. One had a toddler leaning against her leg while she filled out paperwork. Another sat beside a man holding a folder and a coffee, both of them looking considerably more awake than I was. I sat beside Robbie and stared at the form asking for the first day of my last period.

"I should know this."

"Put down what you remember."

"What if I remember wrong?"

"Then tell them you're not sure."

I looked at him. He smiled faintly.

"I feel like I should know all these things and be more prepared."

"Babe, I am sure this is extremely common. It's not a big deal."

"He's right, you know," a random woman said.

We both looked at her. She was one of the women who was obviously pregnant and had been there before. She looked at me kindly and asked,

"Is it your first?"

I nodded. She smiled wide.

"Get ready to learn a whole bunch of stuff you didn't know, and no, you shouldn't have all the answers, especially if you weren't trying. Also, no, you're not going to feel really, truly ready. This is baby number 4 for me and my husband, and I still don't feel like we know what we're doing. It's all right. You'll get there."

I found her words comforting in a sense. I smiled and thanked her. Robbie's knee rested against mine while I finished the paperwork. When they finally called my name, I stood too quickly and had to pause.

Robbie was on his feet immediately.

"You good?"

"Yeah. Just stood up like an idiot."

He offered his hand without making a thing of it. I took it. The nurse brought us back, checked my blood pressure, asked questions, and confirmed which medications I'd been taking. I answered as honestly as I could, including admitting that I didn't know exactly how far along I might be. Nobody seemed particularly shocked by that.

Robbie may have been right; it appeared that I wasn't the first woman to show up pregnant without a neatly organized timeline. That was reassuring. By the time we were alone in the examination room, Robbie had pulled his chair close enough that I could reach him easily.

I looked at the posters on the wall, then at the closed door.

"This is taking forever."

"It's been about four minutes."

"Longest four minutes ever."

He took my hand. I looked down at our fingers.

"Are you still happy?"

His eyes lifted to mine immediately.

"Yes, my love."

"Okay."

He moved closer.

"Are you?"

"Yes. I just keep getting scared between the happy parts."

He kissed my knuckles.

"Me too."

The provider came in a few minutes later, introduced herself, and talked us through what the visit would involve. Robbie listened closely. When she asked whether we had questions, he looked at me first. I had several.

About the birth control and if the fact that I had taken it until I found out was a problem. About the nausea and when it might go away. About whether being this tired was normal. About all the things I'd thought of since taking the test and immediately forgotten once I sat down.

She answered without making me feel ridiculous. Robbie wrote things down. Actual notes. More than he ever took in college. Cassie would have been proud. When it was time for the ultrasound, he stayed beside me. I'd thought I was prepared for it. I knew why we were there. I knew what an ultrasound was supposed to show.

Then the screen lit up, and I realized I had no idea what I was looking at. The room felt very quiet. I watched the provider's face instead of the screen for a few seconds, trying to work out whether she looked pleased or concerned. Robbie's thumb moved slowly over my hand. Then she adjusted the image and pointed.

"There."

I turned toward the screen. She showed us what she was looking at, explaining the picture in a calm voice. The measurements suggested I was a little further along than I'd expected, around nine weeks. I looked at Robbie. He was staring at the screen.

"Baby..."

He nodded without looking away.

"I see it, babe."

There was a tiny flicker.

"That's the cardiac activity," she explained.

I stopped breathing for a second. Robbie leaned forward. Then she told us we could listen briefly. The sound filled the room. Fast. Steady. I had expected something familiar. A heartbeat was a heartbeat. I'd heard mine. I'd lain on Robbie's chest and listened to his more times than I could count.

This was different. I started crying before I even realized I was going to.

"Oh, my God."

Robbie's hand tightened around mine. I turned toward him. His eyes were wet. He didn't seem to notice. He was looking at the screen with his mouth slightly open, and I watched him try to say something before he gave up and shook his head.

"That's..."

"Our baby," I whispered.

He looked at me then.

"Yeah... that's our baby!"

He bent and kissed me. It was awkward with the angle and the tears and me laughing a little because I couldn't seem to stop doing both. I didn't care. When he straightened, he wiped beneath one eye with the heel of his hand.

"Sorry."

The provider smiled.

"No need to apologize. You're not the first dad to get emotional."

He laughed softly, looking back at the screen. I kept watching him. I'd known I wanted children with him for a long time. Even before the conversations with Cassie. Even before we'd had a house with rooms we could imagine turning into nurseries. But there was something about seeing him there, listening to that sound, that made it feel completely different from wanting. He was already that baby's father. And I was already its mother.

By the time we left, I had information to read, another appointment to schedule, and pictures I couldn't stop looking at. Robbie held the envelope while I got into the truck, then handed it back like it contained something breakable. I pulled out one of the pictures before he even started the engine. He looked over.

"You good?"

I nodded. Then I laughed.

"I think so."

He leaned across and kissed me. We stayed there for a moment, his hand against my cheek.

"I love you," he said.

"I love you too, baby."

He rested his forehead against mine briefly before sitting back.

"Food?"

"Please."

"What sounds good?"

I thought about it. Then I named a place we both liked and immediately added, "But if I smell something weird when we get there, we may have to leave."

"Fair terms."

Before we pulled out, I called Cassie. She answered immediately.

"Well?"

I smiled so hard my face hurt.

"We heard the heartbeat."

There was a sharp little inhale.

"Oh, Honey."

I looked at Robbie. He was smiling down at the steering wheel.

"It was..." I shook my head, even though she couldn't see it. "Fuck. I don't even know."

"Everything looked okay?"

"They said things looked good today. About nine weeks."

"Holy shit."

"Yeah."

She was quiet for a moment.

Then, softly, "How's Papi?"

Robbie looked over.

"Present."

Cassie laughed.

"Did you cry?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"Did he cry?"

"He says that office was really dusty and that his allergies act up at the end of summer."

I laughed, and he shook his head. We told her we were getting lunch and that I'd show her everything when she got home.

"Please eat something," she said.

"I'm literally on my way to do that."

"I know. It felt good to say it to somebody else for once."

We got a booth near the back of the restaurant. For the first few minutes, we talked about the appointment. The next one. Who we wanted to tell and when. Whether I wanted to call my mother yet.

"I want a little time first," I said.

"Okay."

"Not because I think she'll react badly. I just..."

"Want to have it for yourself for a minute?"

"Yeah."

He nodded.

"We can do that."

Our food came, and I discovered I was actually hungry. That felt like a fucking accomplishment. Robbie smiled when I took my second bite without stopping to negotiate with my stomach. I pointed my fork at him.

"Don't."

"I'm enjoying my lunch."

"You're enjoying supervising mine."

"Both can be true."

I smiled and took another bite. A little while later, I pulled the ultrasound picture out again. He watched me look at it.

"I'm going to be unbearable with this," I said.

"You've taken it out four times since we parked."

"I'm aware."

"Five if we count the waiting area."

"Are you complaining?"

"Not even a little."

He reached across the table. I handed it to him. He looked at it for a long time. Then his smile faded slightly. Not completely. Someone that didn't know him probably wouldn't have noticed.

"What?"

He shook his head.

"Nothing."

"Baby..."

His eyes lifted to mine. I waited. He set the picture carefully beside his plate.

"I'm happy."

"I know."

"I need you to know that before I say anything else."

My stomach tightened.

"Okay..."

He looked down at his hands.

"I'm also scared as fuck."

"About the baby?"

"About me."

I put my fork down. He let out a breath.

"I know how to say I want to be a dad. I know I want to be there. I can sit across from Cassie's parents and tell them I'll do the appointments and diapers and whatever else. I can tell your mom about how I'll be there for you through everything."

"You meant all of that."

"Every word."

"Then what?"

His eyes moved toward the picture.

"I don't know what I'm doing, Kat."

"Neither do I."

"I know. But..."

He stopped.

I reached across the table for his hand.

He took it.

"I don't have anything good to go back to," he said quietly. "When I think about being a kid, I don't think about somebody knowing what to do. You and Cassie had these great dads you talk about. I don't."

I watched his face. He didn't talk about his parents often. When he did, he usually kept it brief. Facts. Enough to explain something, then he moved on. This didn't feel like that.

"I know there'll be crying," he continued. "I know we won't sleep. I'm not stupid. But what happens when I'm exhausted and frustrated and nothing I do helps?"

"We take turns."

"Yeah. We do. But at some point, I'm going to be alone with our child, and they're going to need something, and what if I can't figure it out?"

He looked at me.

"What if I start to be like... him? I'm sure he didn't start off like he is now or was then."

I knew who he meant. My throat tightened.

"Baby..."

"My dad didn't walk around telling people he was going to be a terrible father. He went to work. Paid bills. Probably thought he was doing what he was supposed to. Something changed in him eventually, though. The booze became more important."

"You're not your father."

"I know."

He said it gently. That somehow made me feel worse.

"I know I'm not him. I don't want to be him. I just don't know if wanting that is the same as knowing how to do something different. If that makes sense."

I opened my mouth. Nothing useful came out. He rubbed his thumb over my hand.

"I'm not saying I think I'm going to hurt our kids."

"I know."

"I'm saying I'm scared there are things I don't even know to look for."

I looked down at our hands. There were so many things I wanted to tell him. That he was kind. That I'd seen him be patient when he had every reason not to be. That he had spent years taking care of people without making them feel like they were a burden. That I trusted him with me. With Cassie. With this. But he knew I thought those things. He wasn't asking whether I loved him enough to believe in him. He was trying to explain something that frightened him. And I didn't know how to make it less frightening without pretending it was simple.

"My mom told us we ruined her life," he said.

His voice was so quiet I had to lean closer.

"I know."

"There is just so much about being a parent that I don't know how to do. I only know what I don't want to do."

He looked at the ultrasound picture again.

"I want them to come to me. I just don't know how you make somebody know they can."

I blinked hard.

"You let them. Just like you have with me, and with Cassie. Just like you do with your students and your wrestlers."

He nodded slightly.

"Yeah."

It wasn't disagreement. It wasn't reassurance either. I moved out of my side of the booth and slid in beside him. He looked at me, then shifted to make room. I put my arms around him.

"I'm glad you told me."

His arm came around my shoulders.

"I don't want you thinking I'm not excited."

"I don't."

"I am, baby. Hearing that..."

His voice caught, and he looked away.

I held him closer.

"I know."

We sat like that for a little while. I wanted to tell him he'd be amazing and have that be enough. I wanted him to believe me because I believed it so completely. But I could feel how much I didn't understand about the fear he was describing.

"I don't have a good answer yet," I admitted.

He looked down at me.

"You don't have to fix it over lunch."

"I want to, though."

"I know, babe."

He kissed my forehead. We finished eating. Eventually, he made a joke about the amount of reading material they'd sent home with us, and I laughed. He held my hand on the way to the truck. The conversation stayed with me.

That afternoon, Robbie went through the information from the appointment while I answered a few messages from the store. Then I fell asleep. I hadn't intended to. I'd sat down on the couch with a blanket and my phone, and the next thing I knew, the light in the room had changed. There was water on the table beside me and Lady lying on the floor.

Robbie was in the kitchen. He looked over when I sat up.

"Hey, babe."

"How long was I out?"

"A little over an hour."

"Fuck."

"You needed it."

I rubbed my face. He came over and handed me the water. I took it, watching him.

"You okay, baby?"

"Yeah."

He leaned down and kissed me.

"I'm going to take Lady out before dinner."

"Okay."

He wasn't distant. That almost made it harder to know what to do with the conversation from lunch. He still touched me when he passed. Still asked what sounded good to eat. Still smiled when I took the picture out again. But every once in a while, I caught him thinking. And I knew better than to assume that because he was taking care of everybody, he had stopped being afraid.

Cassie got home while Robbie was out on the deck. He had let Lady back in earlier but stayed outside. I heard her come in, followed by Lady's enthusiastic greeting.

"Yes, hello. I also live here. Very exciting."

I smiled before she even reached the kitchen.

"There she is."

She put her bag down and came straight to me.

"How are you feeling?"

"Pretty good right now."

"Good."

She kissed me, then glanced at the envelope on the island.

"May I?"

"Of course."

I took the pictures out. She stood beside me while I showed her which part they'd pointed out and what they'd told us. Her fingers touched the edge of the paper.

"That's so little."

"I know."

"And you heard it?"

I nodded. She looked at me, her eyes shining.

"I'm so happy for you."

I put my arm around her.

"For us."

Her expression changed. Then she nodded and leaned against me.

"For us," she repeated.

I kissed her cheek. She asked about the appointment, and I told her more than I probably needed to. She listened to all of it. Asked what I'd thought of the provider. Whether they'd helped with the nausea. When the next appointment was. When I told her, she took out her phone.

"What are you doing?"

"Checking the calendar."

I smiled.

She looked up.

"You invited me!"

"I know I did!"

She put the date in, then set her phone down.

"Where's Papi?"

"Still out on the deck, I think."

She looked toward the back of the house.

Through the glass, Robbie was visible on the upper deck. He sat beside the little gas fire pit overlooking the pool, leaning forward with his forearms on his thighs, the flicker of the flames dancing over the glass pieces. He had a drink beside him, but he wasn't touching it. Cassie watched him for a moment. Then she looked at me.

"What happened?"

I took a breath.

"At lunch, he told me he's scared."

Her expression became more serious.

"About being a dad?"

I nodded.

"About not knowing how. About being like his parents."

She looked back toward the deck.

"Fuck."

"Yeah."

I told her what he'd said. Not every word, but enough. When I got to him asking what would happen if he started being like his father, her face changed.

"Oh, Papi."

"I told him he wasn't his dad."

"He knows."

"I know."

She looked at me.

"I didn't know what else to say."

Cassie reached for my hand.

"I don't think there's one thing we can say that makes that go away."

"I don't either."

For a moment, we both watched him through the glass. Then she picked up the envelope.

"Come on, my sweet."

Robbie looked up when we stepped onto the deck.

"Hey, Chica."

"Hey, Papi."

She leaned down to kiss him before taking the chair beside his. I sat on the other side. The pool lights were on below us. The gas fire moved quietly behind the glass, and the evening had finally cooled enough that sitting outside felt good. For a moment, nobody said anything. Then Robbie looked between us.

"I'm getting the impression this isn't a coincidence."

"No," I admitted.

His eyes settled on mine.

"I told her what you said at lunch."

He nodded slowly.

"Okay."

"I hope that's okay."

"Of course it is."

Cassie leaned back in her chair.

"For the record, I don't have a motivational speech prepared."

"That's disappointing."

"I know. I usually charge for those."

He smiled faintly. I reached for his hand.

"I kept thinking about what you said."

"You don't have to worry about me, babe. I'm..."

"I'm going to stop you right there."

He looked at me.

I held his gaze.

"You're not fine, and you're allowed to need something while I'm pregnant."

His mouth closed. Cassie nodded.

"Very inconvenient for your whole operation, but true."

He looked down, smiling a little.

"All right."

I rubbed my thumb over his hand.

"When I said you weren't your father, I meant it. But I realized that didn't answer what you were telling me."

He watched me.

"You weren't asking if I knew the difference. You were telling me you don't always know what doing it differently looks like."

"Yeah," he said quietly.

Cassie leaned forward.

"Then we learn."

He glanced at her.

"I know that sounds obvious," she continued. "But I mean actually learn. Classes. Books. Asking people things. You don't have to wait until you're exhausted with a crying baby to start figuring out what helps."

He nodded slightly.

"And if there are parts of growing up that you need help sorting through," I added, "we can find somebody who knows more about that than we do."

He looked toward the pool. I let him think.

After a moment, he said, "I've spent a long time being fine without them."

"Without your parents?" I asked.

He nodded.

"I left. I built a life. I don't sit around wishing my dad would call."

"I know."

"And now we hear a heartbeat, and suddenly I was sitting in a restaurant thinking about shit I haven't wanted to think about in years."

Cassie's expression softened.

"That makes sense to me."

He looked at her.

"You're about to be a parent," she said. "Of course you're thinking about yours."

He rubbed a hand over the back of his neck.

"I don't want this to become about them."

"It doesn't have to," I said. "But you don't have to pretend they left you nothing to deal with either."

He was quiet. I moved my chair closer.

"I don't know everything you'll need," I admitted. "I'm probably going to get some of it wrong. But I want you to tell me when you're struggling. I don't want you standing in the kitchen making me toast while deciding your fear has to wait because I'm tired."

His eyes lifted to mine.

"I wasn't..."

"I know you weren't trying to. I'm just telling you now."

He looked at our hands, then nodded.

"Okay."

Cassie rested her elbows on her knees.

"We are all going to make mistakes as parents. Especially since we are walking into a more complicated situation with our one-family approach. We need to learn that some mistakes are okay."

She shrugged.

"My mom hurt me. You know that. But the part that kept hurting was wondering whether every conversation would turn into her trying to make me agree with her."

Robbie listened.

"When she finally let me tell her what I needed, it mattered. When she called the next morning, it mattered. She didn't suddenly become a different person. She did something different, and then she did it again. It's not perfect, but it's a learning experience she and I are going through."

He looked down.

"You already know I'm going to get it wrong?"

"Of course you are, Papi."

He let out a surprised little laugh.

"So are we," she added. "We're going to be tired and worried and occasionally full of shit. I don't need you to promise you'll never have a bad moment."

"What do you need?"

"Just keep being you! For you to keep noticing everything you already notice. To keep listening when somebody talks to you. To apologize without making anyone take care of your feelings. All the things you already do, baby."

I squeezed his hand.

"And to let us help before you get to the end of yourself."

He took a slow breath. I could see him considering it. Not just waiting for us to finish.

"I think I can do that," he said.

Cassie nodded.

"I know you can."

He looked toward the pool again.

"My mother used to talk like we'd taken something from her. Just by being there."

My chest hurt.

"I know," I said softly.

"What if I miss how things were? What if I'm tired and I miss being able to leave the house without packing half the fucking house first?"

Cassie tilted her head.

"Then you miss it."

He looked at her.

"You can love your kid and want an uninterrupted shower," she said. "I'm pretty sure people have been doing that for a while. We are in a different place than she was."

A laugh escaped me. Robbie smiled, but she kept going.

"Having a hard day isn't the same as telling a child they ruined your life. And if you're having a hard enough day that you're worried about what you might say, you tell us. We take over for a while. Then you come back."

He leaned back in his chair. The tension in his shoulders had eased a little. I watched the fire for a moment before speaking.

"I'm scared too."

He turned toward me immediately.

"About what?"

"So many things, baby."

Cassie laughed softly. I looked at him.

"About being responsible for somebody who can't tell me what's wrong. About missing something important. About loving them so much that I start trying to control everything because I think being scared gives me the right."

I thought of my mother and my father.

"I have things I don't want to repeat too."

He reached for my other hand. I leaned closer.

"I don't want us to promise we'll never be like our parents and then decide we've handled it. I want us to keep paying attention."

He nodded.

"We can do that."

"Yeah."

Cassie looked between us. He smiled at her, then looked at me.

"I don't want you feeling like you have to watch me."

"I don't want that either," I said. "I just want us watching out for each other. There's a difference."

He went quiet again. This time, it didn't feel like he was getting farther away. Cassie picked up the envelope from her lap and held out one of the pictures. He took it. For a moment, he just looked. Then his face softened in a way that made my eyes burn.

"I really am happy," he said.

I leaned over and kissed his cheek.

"I know, baby."

"I keep thinking about that sound."

"Me too."

Cassie moved closer so she could look at the picture with him.

"What did you do when you heard it?" she asked.

He laughed under his breath.

"Forgot every question I'd planned to ask."

"Excellent note-taking."

"Hey now, I recovered."

"He did," I said. "Eventually."

He looked between us. Then he shook his head, smiling.

"Holy shit. There's going to be a baby here."

"Yeah," Cassie said.

"In this house."

"Generally, the plan," I told him.

He looked toward the doors behind us. I could almost see him imagining it. The stairs. The rooms. Lady following somebody small through the kitchen. His smile grew, then faltered a little.

"I'm still nervous."

I squeezed his hand.

"You can be. That's perfectly natural."

Cassie rested her hand against his arm.

"We'll go to a class, Papi. You can ask an unreasonable number of questions and make the instructor regret inviting participation."

He laughed.

"That does sound like me."

"It really does."

He looked at the picture again. Then at me.

"Will you send me the appointment information? The next one."

"I already did."

He blinked.

"You did?"

"While you were outside."

He took out his phone, checked it, and smiled.

"Okay."

Cassie leaned against the side of his chair.

"I'm coming to that one too."

"Good," he said immediately.

The way he said it made her smile. We stayed outside a little longer. We talked about the appointment and the room we'd mentioned turning into a nursery. Nobody picked a paint color or started ordering furniture. We just let ourselves imagine a few things.

Eventually, I yawned. Robbie looked at me.

"Bed?"

I nodded.

"Please."

He stood and offered his hand. I took it, then reached for Cassie. Before we went inside, he stopped. We both looked at him.

"Thank you."

Cassie's expression softened.

"Of course, Papi."

He looked at me.

"I'm glad I told you."

"Me too."

I kissed him. He rested his forehead against mine for a moment, then reached for Cassie and kissed her too. Inside, he set the ultrasound picture on the nightstand while we got ready for bed. I watched him look at it one more time before he turned out the light. When he climbed in, I settled against him. Cassie moved closer on my other side, her hand resting over mine against his chest. His heartbeat was steady beneath my cheek. After a while, his hand settled gently against my stomach. I put mine over it.

"Hey," he whispered.

I tilted my face toward him. But he was looking down. I smiled and stayed quiet. His thumb moved once beneath my hand.

"Glad you're here."

Cassie's fingers tightened around mine. I closed my eyes, feeling him hold us closer. He was still learning what to say. So were we. But that was a pretty good start.

The next few weeks came in a whirlwind. Cassie came to the second appointment and cried when she heard the heartbeat too. To the credit of the staff at the doctor's office, none of them reacted much when seeing the shared affection between the three of us. Not to say we were making out in the middle of the appointment or anything, but still. What nobody warned me about was that as the nausea began fading, my energy came back along with an irrationally strong sex drive. I wasn't prepared for the quick shifts between being outrageously emotional and overwhelmingly horny.

I felt my boobs getting bigger, as did Robbie, of course. When I began showing even the slightest bit, not even enough for anyone but Cassie and Robbie to notice, I became self-conscious.

One night, I stood in front of the mirror in our bedroom longer than I meant to. I was wearing one of Robbie's old wrestling shirts, which on me was considerably closer to a dress. I'd been sleeping in his shirts for years. They were soft, comfortable, and usually smelled at least a little like him. That night, I also appreciated how loosely the fabric hung over my stomach, hiding the little curve I had spent the last several minutes trying to see from different angles.

It seemed that I wanted to hide it and inspect it at the same time. Very fucking productive.

I was happy about the baby. Ridiculously happy. That didn't stop me from missing the way my clothes had fit a few weeks earlier. My bras had become uncomfortable, and the waistband of my favorite shorts was beginning to annoy me. None of the changes were dramatic yet, but I knew my body well enough to notice them.

Robbie came out of the bathroom wearing only his boxers, rubbing a towel over his hair. I watched him cross the room and put his phone on the charger. The man still looked like somebody had carved a Greek god out of marble and then given him a completely unreasonable ability to make me laugh effortlessly. Even the scars around his knee seemed to add something to his ridiculously over-the-top yet absolutely effortless good looks. It was usually one of my favorite views. That night, I looked back at myself and pulled his shirt a little farther away from my stomach.

"You coming, babe?" he asked.

"In a second."

He climbed into bed while I pretended to adjust the collar. Then Cassie came out of the closet wearing a lacy black thong and a short, loose crop top, her red hair falling over one shoulder. The shirt slipped slightly off the other shoulder, its hem struggling to keep her perfect, perky breasts covered as she crossed the room. It was the kind of thing she could throw on without trying and look completely fucking incredible.

There was a seductive sway to her hips when she walked that I doubted she even thought about. I knew her well enough to recognize when she was putting on a show. This wasn't that. She was just walking over to charge her phone, comfortable in her own skin, while I stood there finding new things to dislike about mine.

My eyes followed her before I could help it. Her sensual curves, the relaxed set of her shoulders, the little smile she gave Robbie when he moved something off her side of the bed. God, she was sexy. I usually loved getting to watch these ordinary moments, knowing I could reach for her whenever I wanted. That night, I looked from her to my oversized shirt and wondered when I had started feeling relieved to be covered up.

She said something to Robbie about the alarm and slipped beneath the covers. I looked at the two of them and suddenly wished his shirt were even bigger. Robbie noticed first. Of course he did. He stopped answering whatever Cassie had asked and looked at me.

"Babe? What's going on?"

"Nothing."

Cassie followed his gaze toward the mirror, then looked at my hands still holding the shirt away from my stomach. Her expression softened, which somehow made me want to cry more than if she hadn't noticed anything.

"Come here, my sweet."

I shook my head, embarrassed by how quickly my eyes were burning. "I'm being stupid."

"Okay," Robbie said. "Come tell us about it."

That almost got a laugh out of me. I turned away from the mirror and went over to the bed, sitting near his hip. He put a hand against my back while Cassie moved closer. For a moment, I stared at my knees. Then I looked between them.

"You two are just so fucking hot."

Cassie blinked. "Well, I'm enjoying this conversation so far."

We all giggled at that one.

"Go on, babe, we're listening."

I looked down again. "You look like that, and she looks like that, and I'm sitting here feeling grateful your shirt is big enough that nobody can see what's happening underneath it."

Robbie glanced at the faded wrestling logo, then back at me.

"Your little baby bump?"

I nodded, pulling at the hem. "Usually, I just put this on and come to bed. Tonight, I keep checking whether you can see it."

His hand went still against my back. Cassie rested hers over mine, gently stopping me from stretching the fabric.

"I'm getting bigger," I said. "And I know why. I'm happy about why. I just didn't expect to feel so self-conscious."

"You don't have to enjoy every change to be happy about the baby," Cassie said.

"I know."

"Do you?"

I looked at her. "In theory."

She nodded. "Theory's a bitch sometimes."

Robbie moved his hand slowly over my back. "What were you thinking when you looked at us?"

I didn't want to answer. That was probably why he'd asked.

"That you could have each other and keep looking super sexy while doing it," I admitted. "And I'm just going to keep getting bigger, and I don't know how you're both going to keep..."

I stopped. Saying it out loud made it sound worse than it had in my head.

"Wanting you?" he asked.

I nodded without looking at him.

"Babe, look at me."

I did. His expression was serious, but there was nothing hurt or offended in it. He wasn't making me feel guilty for needing to hear the answer.

"I still want you."

"Because you love me."

"Yes, I do love you. I also think you're incredibly sexy." His mouth curved slightly. "I thought we'd been making that fairly obvious."

I felt my face warm. Cassie glanced at him, then back at me.

"He has a point, Honey."

Robbie brushed his thumb against my cheek. "Since your nausea eased up, we've been having more sex than we did before you were pregnant. Both of us have been all over you."

"I know."

Cassie tilted her head. "Honey, have either of us been giving you the impression we'd rather be doing something else?"

A laugh escaped me despite myself. "No."

"Good. Because I thought I'd been fairly clear."

"You have."

She smiled. "Then give us a little credit for knowing who we want."

I shook my head, smiling, but Robbie kept watching me.

"What happens when I get bigger, though?" I asked.

His eyes softened. He glanced toward my stomach before meeting my gaze again.

"I think you're becoming even more beautiful carrying our baby."

My throat tightened immediately.

"Baby..."

"I mean it." He took my hand. "I look at you and think about what we saw on that screen. About getting to meet somebody we made together. Nothing could ever happen that would make me not look at you like one of the most beautiful women on the planet. Then you catch me staring and ask what I'm looking at."

"You do keep doing that."

"Yeah. I'm pretty happy and you're really fuckin' sexy."

I looked down at our hands. "I'm happy too."

"I know you are. And I'm not expecting you to love every part of being pregnant just because I love looking at you." He moved a little closer. "But I'm not waiting for you to look like you did before, babe. You don't have to get through this and come back to me afterward."

That one got me. A tear slipped down my cheek before I could stop it, and he reached up to wipe it away.

"I didn't even realize that was what I was thinking."

"I figured it might be part of it."

Cassie shifted closer, her knee touching mine. "You know when you're getting dressed and you catch me looking at you?"

"Yeah."

"I'm not checking whether you still qualify as hot enough for me."

I laughed, even with the tears. "That's a horrible way to put it."

"I know, but it's valid, though."

She smiled and brushed my hair away from my cheek. "I like looking at you. I like being close to you. None of that stopped because your jeans got tight."

I glanced down at Robbie's shirt.

"I feel ridiculous."

"For wearing my shirt?" he asked. "Babe, you've been stealing those for years. I'm hardly going to object now."

"Borrowing."

"Of course. When should I expect that one back?"

Cassie looked at the faded logo. "I don't plan on giving back any of the ones I took."

"Exactly."

I laughed, and Robbie leaned forward to kiss my forehead.

"You look good in it, babe. You don't have to hide from us."

For a moment, I just looked at him. Then I turned toward Cassie, who was watching me with a small, patient smile.

"You really both still think I'm sexy?"

"Yes," they said together.

Cassie looked at Robbie and they both laughed.

I wiped beneath my eyes, smiling now. Nothing about my body had changed during the conversation. My bra would probably still annoy me tomorrow, and I would almost definitely look at myself sideways in the mirror again. But neither of them seemed to be waiting for me to become somebody more familiar.

I leaned toward Cassie and kissed her. I'd meant it as a thank-you, something brief and affectionate. When she kissed me back, I stopped feeling quite so interested in ending it. My hand settled against her cheek, and for a few seconds, I forgot the mirror entirely.

When we separated, she smiled.

"Feeling a little better?"

"Possibly."

Robbie laughed quietly beside us. I turned toward him, and he brushed the last of the dampness from beneath my eye.

I kissed him too. His hand came up to the back of my neck, and I leaned closer, finally letting myself believe what they'd been telling me. When I drew back, he followed just enough to kiss me once more. That familiar little smile was waiting when I opened my eyes.

I glanced at Cassie. She raised an eyebrow, clearly recognizing the change in my expression.

"What are you thinking, my sweet?"

"That I may have wasted several perfectly good minutes arguing with both of you."

"Tragic," she said.

"Can we recover?"

Robbie reached for my hand and drew me closer. "I'm willing to try."

I settled between them, still smiling, and reached down to lift the shirt off, exposing my naked form to the two of them.

"Show me how badly you both want me?"

"Gladly."

Neither of them needed any more encouragement. Without hesitation, they were both kissing my neck on either side. Both of their hands were exploring my body. Robbie began massaging my swollen tits while I felt Cassie's hand slide down between my thighs. I spread my legs eagerly. Her delicate fingers slid down along my wet slit, sending shivers up my spine as her fingers danced over my clit. I gasped slightly as she slid her fingers inside me.

Cassie's mouth moved down along my neck, over my collarbone, over the swell of my breasts until her mouth found my nipple. She swirled her tongue around it before sucking and nibbling gently on it. As she did, Robbie brought his mouth to mine and kissed me deeply and passionately. Each of my hands moved to cup the back of their heads.

As he kissed me, Robbie slid his hand between my thighs as well. His fingers took the place of hers as she pulled them out of me. As Robbie began fingering me with his magical touch that hit all the right places, Cassie began rubbing my clit. The dual stimulation drove me wild as my hips began to roll to meet their movements.

When Robbie broke the kiss and Cassie took her mouth off my nipples, I opened my eyes to the beautiful sight of them kissing passionately as they worked my pussy. When they finally broke their kiss, Cassie gave me a hungry look before lying flat on the bed and saying, "Come here, girl."

She pulled me into position so I was straddling her face. She pulled my pussy down onto her face and began eating me out, holding me in place with a hand on each of my thighs. Robbie leaned back and ditched his boxers, leaving him naked as well. I acted instinctively when I saw his throbbing cock standing at attention before me. I leaned down and took the head into my mouth before working his cock deeper into my throat.

I worked his cock continuously as Cassie devoured my pussy. My eyes rolled back in ecstasy as I felt every ridge and vein on my husband's cock on my lips and Cassie's tongue swirled around my clit. She ate my pussy almost as hungrily as I devoured his cock. Cassie's moans beneath me helped push me to the edge. Robbie's fingers curling into my hair as he called me a good girl pushed me over it. His cock slid from my mouth as I began moaning.

"Oh, fuck! That's it, Cass! Don't stop!"

As I moaned, my back arched as I ground my pussy on her tongue. She held my hips as I rode out my orgasm. I laid my face against Robbie's stomach as my legs shook. Once I recovered, we all moved with a practiced ease, as if we could all read each other's thoughts. Cassie leaned back now with her legs spread wide, exposing her glistening, freshly shaved pussy. I immediately leaned forward and lowered my mouth to her slick folds. I left my ass up in the air, presenting myself to Robbie, a clear invitation for him to fuck me. He didn't need to be told. I felt his hands on my hips a second before I felt the head of his cock slide into my wet heat.

I moaned into Cassie's pussy as I felt his cock stretch me in the best way. I arched my back as much as I could to take him even deeper. My brain almost short-circuited at the feeling of his thick cock sliding in and out of me at the same time as my tongue tasted Cassie's delicious, sweet pussy. Her fingers tangled into my hair now as she pressed my face to her wet folds. The room was soon filled with a chorus of moans and the sound of skin slapping against skin. Robbie kept drilling my pussy hard when Cassie and I came at nearly the same time. He had to breathe hard to keep himself from cumming on the spot.

Once we recovered from those orgasms, it was another seamless transition as I moved and Robbie took his place between Cassie's legs and began fucking her. He didn't hold back with her; he knew exactly how she would want it. I lay back and watched him plow her pussy with hard, unrelenting strokes. She moaned loudly as Robbie railed her. I lay next to her and watched for a moment, just taking in the sexy sight before me before leaning down and sucking on her nipples as he continued pounding her. She cupped my head as I did.

After Robbie brought Cassie to another orgasm, he didn't hesitate to slide over and grab my hips and pull me towards him after he pulled out of her. I wrapped my legs around his waist as he slid back inside me before pulling him into a deep and passionate kiss. He continued fucking me with long, deep strokes. Cassie lay on the bed and watched us with a content look on her face. He looked deep into my eyes and told me how much he loved me as he kept thrusting. His breath became shaky, and I could tell he was struggling to keep his rhythm. I felt the tension in my own body rising, and as I heard him utter the words "I'm about to cum!" I broke.

My back arched again, my legs clamped around him, and I let out a loud moan of pure pleasure as I felt him erupt inside of me. My orgasm crashed over me like waves as I felt the jets of cum fill me. I heard Cassie's moans as well, indicating she was clearly enjoying the show. Robbie collapsed next to me, his head resting on my chest as he panted and recovered. Cassie slid in on the other side, and we all lay there and simply cuddled without saying a word. I couldn't help but smile when I thought of how lucky I was that both my partners, my husband and my girlfriend, helped me go from feeling so self-conscious to so completely wanted so quickly. Of course, the sex was amazing as always, but it was the passion and the intimacy that had me feeling so warm. I kissed Cassie and then Robbie before telling them both how much I loved them. We all joked about how frustrating it was that we had all just gotten clean and now we had to go rinse off the sheen of sweat and smell of sex. None of us really minded. We showered together and got back into bed before sleep quickly found me.

The next couple weeks were more of the same. Work, appointments, home, happiness. Once I crossed the threshold of it being safe to tell people, we told Ricky and Evan first. We called and told my grandparents. I wanted to do something more memorable than call my mother and announce that I was pregnant while she was between meetings.

For all the complicated history between us, things had been getting better. We talked more often. Sometimes she called with a question about the store, then stayed on the phone long after I'd answered it. Sometimes I called her without spending ten minutes deciding whether I wanted to first. I wanted her to be part of this.

The idea came to me while I was putting a misplaced book back in the parenting section. Somebody had left a guide for new grandparents beside the pregnancy books. I stood there looking at it, picturing Mom reading the cover while I waited beside her. By the time I went upstairs, I had a plan. Cassie listened from the other side of my desk, smiling more with every detail.

"You're going to make her figure it out?"

"I'm going to give her some very obvious clues."

"She'll love that."

"You think?"

"Honey, you're giving her a grandchild and homework. It's practically a custom gift."

I laughed.

That afternoon, I called her.

"Hi, sweetheart."

"Hey, Mom. Do you have a minute?"

"For you? Of course."

I smiled and leaned back in my chair.

"I was wondering if you'd come spend a long weekend with us."

"I'd love to. When were you thinking?"

"Next weekend? Maybe Thursday through Sunday, if that isn't too much time away."

"Is everything okay, Katarina?"

"Yeah, I just miss you, Mom, and I don't really want to wait until Thanksgiving to see you."

"Aww, okay. Let me look."

I heard her moving something on her desk.

"You don't have to rearrange everything," I added.

"Katarina, you've invited me to spend a few days with you. I'm going to rearrange a few things."

"You sound very determined."

"I am. Thursday afternoon?"

"Really?"

"Yes, really." There was a smile in her voice. "I'll clear Friday. Anything that desperately needs me can survive a phone call."

Something warm settled in my chest.

"Could you stay here with us this time?" I asked. "We have all these guest rooms. We should probably use one."

"If you're sure."

"I'm inviting you, Mom. Of course, I'm sure."

She laughed softly.

"Fair enough. I'd love to stay."

"Good."

"Does anyone else need to be consulted before I arrive with luggage?"

"Robbie already said yes, and Cassie wants to know what you like for breakfast."

"That's very sweet of her."

"She's pretending this isn't an excuse to make him cook."

"A woman with a plan. I respect it."

I laughed. We worked out the details, and when we hung up, I went straight downstairs to tell Cassie. She took one look at my face.

"She's coming."

"Thursday through Sunday."

"Look at you, inviting your mother for an extended stay."

"I know. Nobody alert the authorities."

She came around the counter and hugged me.

"You happy?"

"Yeah."

"Good."

I leaned against her for another second.

"Now I just have to keep her from figuring it out before we get to the books."

Cassie glanced down at my stomach.

"That may require some wardrobe planning."

By Thursday, I had chosen three books and changed my mind about their order several times. The first was an unmistakable guide to becoming a grandparent. The second covered everything from preparing for a grandchild's arrival to supporting the new parents. The third was a keepsake journal for a grandmother to fill with stories and memories. That one had almost made me cry while I was looking through it. I wanted our child to know her. I wanted Mom to have stories she could tell without either of us worrying about how the conversation might go. I also wanted to get through the fucking announcement before I started sobbing.

I wore a loose, flowing dress that skimmed over my stomach instead of hugging it. At almost fifteen weeks, the little curve was becoming harder to mistake for anything else when I wore something fitted. Beneath the soft folds of the dress, though, I could still keep it to myself. Cassie watched me check the mirror in the office.

"Very sneaky."

"Thank you."

"She's going to hug you."

"I know."

"You've considered this?"

"Cass, I'm pregnant. I'm not smuggling a watermelon."

"Not yet."

I pointed at the door.

"Go do your job."

She kissed me before leaving.

"Love you, my sweet."

"Love you too."

Mom arrived just after lunch. She came through the front door wearing dark trousers and a pale green blouse, her sunglasses pushed up into her hair. The moment she saw me, she smiled.

"There you are."

I went straight to her.

"Hi, Mom."

She hugged me tightly, and I held on, suddenly very glad I'd invited her for more than an afternoon.

"It's so good to see you," she said.

"You too."

She stepped back, keeping a hand on my arm.

"That dress is lovely."

"Thanks."

"And you look well."

Cassie appeared beside us.

"Hi, Lillian."

Mom turned and hugged her too.

"Hello, darling. Thank you for having me."

"We're glad you're here."

After we exchanged some of the usual pleasantries, asking about her flight, discussing the weather, talking about how the store had been doing, the usual, I decided to put my plan into action. I took her hand.

"Come help me with something."

"Should I be concerned?"

"Probably."

"That does sound more like you."

I led her down toward the shelves while Cassie went back to the counter.

"I'm looking for a few books."

Mom glanced around us.

"You've chosen an excellent place."

"Thank you. I worked very hard on the location."

"What are we looking for?"

"Books for a gift."

"Do I know the recipient?"

"Very well."

She looked mildly interested. I stopped at the parenting section and pulled out the first book.

"What do you think of this?"

She took it and read the title.

"A guide for new grandparents."

"Yeah."

She turned it over, scanning the back.

"Well, that narrows down the occasion."

I reached for the second one before I could lose my nerve.

"And this one."

Mom looked at that cover, then at the first.

There was a small pause.

"Are these for the same person?"

"Yes."

I handed her the keepsake journal.

Her eyes settled on the word Grandmother. Then they lifted to mine.

"Katarina..."

I was already smiling so hard it hurt. She looked down at the books again.

"Sweetheart... are you telling me something?"

Instead of answering immediately, I gathered the loose fabric of my dress at my sides and drew it gently back. Her gaze dropped. The dress settled against the modest curve of my stomach. For a second, she didn't move.

"Oh, my God!"

"Surprise!"

She looked from my stomach to my face.

"You're pregnant?"

I nodded.

"I'm pregnant!"

Her mouth opened, but whatever she'd been going to say didn't make it out. She looked down at the books as though she'd forgotten why she was holding them. I took them before she had to decide what to do. Then her arms were around me.

"Oh, sweetheart!"

I laughed against her shoulder, which immediately turned into something much less composed.

"I wanted to tell you in person."

She held me tighter.

"I'm so glad you did."

When she finally drew back, her eyes were wet.

"Look at you."

She glanced down again, then hesitated with one hand between us.

"May I?"

"Of course, Mom."

Her palm settled gently over the little curve.

I put my hand over hers.

She laughed through a shaky breath.

"I'm going to be a grandmother."

"Yeah."

"Oh, Katarina."

Then she hugged me again. So much for getting through it without crying. We ended up in the office with the books, a box of tissues, and the ultrasound pictures. Mom wanted to know everything.

How far along I was. How I'd been feeling. When we'd found out. Whether the appointments had gone well. She listened while I told her about waiting for Robbie and Cassie to get home, and her expression softened when I described his reaction.

"He just stood there?"

"For a minute. I thought I'd broken him."

"That poor boy."

"He recovered."

"I imagine he did."

I showed her the pictures. She held one close, smiling down at it.

"I remember looking at yours."

"What did you think?"

"That I wanted to meet you immediately, and that it was terribly unfair how long I had to wait."

I laughed.

"I understand that."

"You will also occasionally be grateful for the preparation time."

"Already there."

Cassie came up with water and stayed when Mom reached for her hand.

"Congratulations."

"Thank you."

"Kat tells me you went to the last appointment."

"I did."

"And?"

Cassie looked at the picture Mom was holding.

"I thought I was prepared. Then we heard the heartbeat."

Mom nodded slowly.

"Yeah. That will do it."

Cassie's eyes shone, and I reached for her. She leaned against my chair, her hand resting on my shoulder while we talked. Mom asked another question about the appointment, then another about how we were arranging work. It was almost four before she glanced at the clock.

"I've kept you from everything."

"I own the place," I reminded her.

"Yes, but apparently someone still expects you to work."

"Unreasonable, isn't it?"

She smiled and gathered the books.

"These are coming home with me."

"They're yours."

"Good. I intend to be very well prepared."

Cassie looked at me.

"I told you she'd like the homework."

Mom kept herself busy in the office for the rest of the day until we were ready to go home. Mom being Mom, she still took time to look at the books and analyze everything. Cassie informed me later that she was quite pleased and that profits from the events upstairs were significantly better than we initially projected.

Then, when Cassie and I were ready, we all went home. It was odd having Mom there without her usual driver. Having Mom in the house felt strange for about an hour. Then she took off her shoes, asked where we kept the mugs, and stood in the kitchen talking to Robbie while he made dinner. I watched from the doorway for a moment.

He was listening while she told him about something that had happened on the flight up. Cassie sat on a stool at the island, stealing pieces of cucumber from the cutting board whenever he turned away.

He caught her wrist without even looking.

"Chica."

"What?"

"Those are for dinner."

"I'm having an advance portion."

"Well, your advance portion will leave none for the salad."

Mom laughed, and Robbie shook his head before offering Cassie another piece himself. When he saw me, his face changed. There was that smile again. The one that still made it difficult to remember I was capable of walking at a normal pace.

"Hey, babe."

I went to him. His hand settled at my waist as he kissed me.

"Hey."

"Good day at work?"

I glanced at Mom.

"Really good."

He kissed my forehead before letting me go. Mom was smiling at us.

"I've already congratulated him," she said. "At length."

"She got me a little emotional," he admitted.

I touched his cheek.

"Again?"

"It's becoming a concern."

That evening, we talked about the baby over dinner until Cassie pointed out that Mom's food was getting cold. Mom looked down at her plate.

"Oh."

"I did the same thing," Robbie told her.

"I believe you."

She never asked us to explain the relationship that night. Mom listened to our stories, asked about the nursery, and laughed when all three of us started answering a question at once. We just got to be us and spend time with my mom.

When it got late, Mom made her way to bed. We had avoided all heading to bed in front of her, not wanting to raise unnecessary questions. As we got into bed, the thought that she had made time in her schedule and dropped everything to be here made me smile.

Friday gave her a much better idea of what living with us actually looked like. She came downstairs to find Robbie making breakfast while I stood beside him, eating a piece of toast and trying to remember where I'd left my phone. Cassie called from the table.

"Bathroom counter."

I looked at her.

"How do you know?"

"You left it there while explaining that you were absolutely ready to leave."

Mom accepted the coffee Robbie handed her.

"I'm beginning to understand why you keep her."

Cassie smiled.

"My beauty is merely a bonus."

Robbie leaned over and kissed her.

"A pretty good bonus."

"Careful, Papi. We have company!"

Mom spent most of the morning at The Bowery with us. She watched Cassie handle a call about an order, helped me choose between two ideas for a display, and bought more books than she could reasonably finish before her next visit.

At lunch, she asked if we minded her making a short work call.

"Mom, you don't have to ask permission."

"I'm aware. I'm trying to have manners."

Cassie looked at me.

"Interesting concept."

I kicked her gently beneath the table.

That afternoon, we went home earlier than usual. I meant to sit down for a few minutes and woke up almost an hour later with a blanket over me. Mom was in the armchair, reading one of her new books.

"Oh, hey," I said, rubbing my eyes.

"Hello, dear."

"Sorry."

"For sleeping?"

"For being a very exciting hostess."

"I've had coffee, lunch, several good conversations, and uninterrupted reading time. I'm thoroughly entertained."

I smiled and sat up. There was a glass of water on the table beside me.

"Robbie?" I asked.

She nodded.

"He's out with Lady."

"And Cass?"

"Finishing something upstairs."

I took a drink. Mom closed her book.

"Can I ask how you're doing with all of this?"

"The pregnancy?"

"That, and everything around it."

I looked at her. She leaned forward slightly.

"When we spoke before, having children was something you'd discussed for the future. Now you're here."

"Yeah."

"Do you feel ready?"

I laughed.

"Not even remotely."

She smiled.

"That sounds familiar."

"But I'm happy."

"I can see that."

"With all of it, Mom."

She nodded, waiting.

"I've had moments where I've been scared. About the baby. About my body changing. About whether I'm going to know what I'm doing."

"Have you been able to tell them?"

"Yeah."

"And do they listen?"

I glanced toward the hallway.

"They're very good at that."

Mom followed my gaze, then looked back.

"Good."

I turned the glass slowly between my hands.

"Are you still worried about us?"

"I'll probably always worry about you. I would like to stop inventing additional reasons."

That got a laugh out of me. She reached for my hand.

"I wanted to check that you still feel able to ask for what you need. Pregnancy can make you feel surprisingly vulnerable."

"I do."

"And you're happy with the family you're building?"

"Very."

She squeezed my fingers.

"Then I'm glad."

I leaned over and hugged her. She held me without trying to fill the quiet.

Saturday evening, Robbie grilled while Cassie and I put the rest of dinner together. Mom helped, despite all three of us telling her she didn't have to.

"I've been here for two days. I can carry a salad."

"Don't let him hear you," Cassie said. "You'll undermine the whole operation."

Robbie looked in through the open door.

"I heard that."

"Excellent. Saves me repeating myself."

We ate outside as fall was settling in and this would probably be one of the last nice afternoons. Mom sat opposite me, with Cassie beside her and Robbie at my side. Lady settled beneath his chair, maintaining an optimistic interest in dinner.

For a while, the conversation stayed on the store and something Mom wanted to do in the garden at her house. Then she looked around the table.

"I want to say something to all three of you."

Cassie put her glass down. Robbie turned toward her. Mom noticed the sudden attention and smiled.

"Nothing alarming."

"That feels worth establishing," I said.

"Yes, I thought so."

She rested her hands loosely beside her plate.

"When Kat first told me about your relationship, I had questions. She answered them, and I believed her. But I'm glad you invited me to stay long enough to spend some ordinary time with you."

I waited.

"I've watched you work together. I've watched you disagree over very small things without anyone having to wonder whether they're heard. And I've watched how easily you reach for each other."

Cassie's expression softened. Mom looked at Robbie.

"You take very good care of my daughter."

"I try."

"You do." She glanced at Cassie. "Both of you do."

"They take care of me too," he said.

"I've noticed that as well."

I looked down for a second, blinking. Mom continued.

"I like seeing Kat this happy. I like seeing all of you happy."

"We are," Cassie said quietly.

"I know."

She took a breath.

"And for whatever it's worth, you have my approval. All three of you. I'm happy this is the family my grandchild is coming into."

Nobody answered immediately. Then I laughed shakily.

"Well, shit. There goes my makeup."

Mom reached across the table for my hand.

"Oh, sweetheart."

Cassie was blinking hard too.

"Thank you, Lillian."

Mom turned her hand and caught Cassie's fingers with her free one.

"You're very welcome."

Robbie cleared his throat.

"That means a lot."

"I hope so."

He nodded.

"It does."

Mom looked back at me.

"I'd like to keep coming, if you'll have me. Before the baby arrives too. I don't want every visit to need an announcement."

I held her hand tighter.

"I'd like that."

"Good."

Cassie smiled through the last of her tears.

"We have plenty of guest rooms."

"And breakfast requests are accepted in advance," Robbie added.

Mom laughed.

"Well, that settles it."

She stayed at the table with us long after dinner. We talked about when she could come again. Mom took out her phone, and for once, watching her open her calendar didn't make me feel as though I needed an appointment to belong in her life. She was making room.

Cassie suggested a weekend when we had an event at the store. Mom asked whether we wanted help with it, which led to a conversation about what she was and wasn't allowed to reorganize.

"My entire business?" I asked.

"Certainly not. Perhaps a cupboard."

"No cupboards," Cassie said immediately.

Robbie laughed.

"Definitely no cupboards."

Mom looked delighted.

"I see. There are established territorial concerns."

"You have no idea," I told her.

When we finally went inside, she helped Cassie pack the leftovers while Robbie rinsed the dishes. I sat at the island and watched them argue pleasantly about which containers had matching lids. It was such ordinary stuff. I loved it.

Sunday morning, I walked her out while Robbie put her bag in the car she had ordered to take her back to the airport despite us saying we were willing to take her.

Cassie hugged her goodbye first. Then Mom hugged Robbie, thanked him for feeding her, then turned to me. I was already close to crying again.

"This is becoming embarrassing," I told her.

"I'm choosing to take it as a compliment."

I laughed and put my arms around her.

"Come back soon."

"I will."

She held me for a moment, then drew back and glanced toward my stomach.

"Take care of yourself."

"I am."

"I know."

Her eyes moved briefly to Robbie and Cassie, waiting near the front door.

"That's been lovely to see."

I kissed her cheek.

"Call when you get home."

She smiled.

"Yes, sweetheart."

We stood together and waved as she pulled away. Once the car was out of sight, Cassie slipped her arm around my waist.

"You okay, Honey?"

"Yeah."

Robbie brushed a kiss against my temple.

"Good weekend?"

I looked between them.

"Really good."

Cassie's POV

The next couple of months were some of the happiest I could remember. We still had work and bills and days when somebody came home irritated about something stupid, but there was so much to look forward to now. Kat's appointments started going on the calendar beside events at the store and Robbie's teaching and wrestling schedule. We began looking at furniture for the nursery. The spare room we'd been talking about stopped being a place where we put things we hadn't decided what to do with and became somewhere we would eventually put their child... our child.

I loved watching Kat grow. At first, the changes were subtle enough that she would turn sideways in front of the mirror and ask whether we thought she looked different. By November, there wasn't much room left for debate. Her little bump became an unmistakably pregnant stomach, and I caught myself looking at her constantly. She would be standing behind the counter at The Bowery, one hand resting against the curve beneath her sweater while she talked to a customer, and I would forget whatever I'd been about to do.

She caught me once and raised an eyebrow.

"What?"

"Nothing, my sweet."

"You're staring."

"I've been staring for years. You're only just noticing?"

She smiled, but her hand moved over her stomach. "I look different now."

"Yeah, Honey. You do."

I went over and kissed her, then rested my hand beside hers. I knew she still had moments when the changes bothered her, even while she was happy about what they meant. I wasn't going to argue her out of having feelings about her own body. I did intend to keep making it very clear that my feelings about it remained extremely enthusiastic.

Robbie was considerably less subtle. Sometimes she caught him staring and didn't even bother asking why. She simply held out her hand, and he went to her. I particularly enjoyed watching a man his size drop whatever he was doing because his wife wanted him close enough to touch. Robbie was probably the only person who rested his hand on the baby bump more than she did.

Lillian kept coming back too. She visited for the event at the store, then again a couple of weeks later because she had a few days free. Before long, she knew where we kept the extra towels, Lady stopped announcing her arrival like we were being invaded, and Kat began saying things like, "Mom might come over Sunday," without sounding surprised by it.

Then Lillian bought a condo nearby. Kat stared at her across the kitchen island when she told us.

"You bought a condo?"

"Yes."

"Here?"

"About fifteen minutes away, depending on traffic."

"You bought a condo fifteen minutes away."

Lillian smiled over her coffee. "You seem to have understood the important details."

I looked down before Kat could catch me laughing. Robbie turned toward the stove, although the way his shoulders moved gave him away.

"We have guest rooms, Mom."

"And I enjoy them. But I'd like to spend more time here, and I don't want you feeling you have to host me every time I do."

"You're not exactly a difficult guest."

"That's kind of you. I would still like somewhere to keep my own things. Eventually, I will retire as well. When that happens, living closer to my grandchild or grandchildren as well as my daughter will make a lot of things easier."

Kat watched her for another moment. Then her expression changed, and she went around the island to hug her. I stood beside Robbie while they held each other. His hand settled against my lower back, warm and familiar, and I leaned into him. There had been a time when seeing Kat and her mother like that would have seemed almost impossible. Now Lillian was choosing furniture for a place close enough to come over for dinner without packing a bag.

I loved that for Kat. I loved it for all of us.

Thanksgiving arrived with too much food, too many people offering to help in the same part of the kitchen, and Robbie insisting that he knew exactly what he was doing despite having apparently prepared for twice the number of guests we'd invited. Ricky took one look at the counter and laughed.

"Expecting the wrestling team?"

"I like leftovers."

"You're going to have them."

Angel helped me set the table while Kat sat at the island pretending she wasn't enjoying being told to stay out of the way. Lillian brought dessert and spent a considerable amount of time asking questions about the crib we'd been looking at. Evan kept Lady occupied until something hit the floor, at which point her priorities changed immediately. It was a wonderful day.

Angel and I called our parents in the afternoon. Dad showed us the turkey he was carving while Mom corrected him from somewhere behind the phone. We laughed, told them what we'd been doing, and passed the phone around so everybody could say hello.

Mom asked how Kat was feeling. She asked Robbie whether he'd been getting much time off over the holiday. When he answered, she listened instead of immediately finding a reason to be suspicious of it. Those were small things. I knew that. They still mattered to me.

We'd been talking more since Arizona. Sometimes the conversations were awkward, and there were still subjects she approached like she was trying not to touch something hot. But she called. She asked about work. She remembered things I told her and asked about them later. I had started letting myself believe we might actually get somewhere. At the same time, something else had been getting harder to ignore.

I wanted a baby.

I'd known I wanted children someday. We'd already talked about that. But somewhere between Kat's growing stomach and Robbie getting emotional over a drawer full of tiny clothes, someday had stopped feeling comfortably far away.

I thought about the pregnancy scare I'd had after their honeymoon. About sitting in the pool house bathroom with a test in my hand, expecting relief when it came back negative and not quite finding it. I'd been relieved later, when the bloodwork confirmed it and the doctor didn't find anything concerning. I'd been glad there was time to talk about things we hadn't worked out yet. But I remembered the disappointment too. At the time, I hadn't known what to do with it. Now I did.

Watching Kat wasn't making me want to take her place. I loved going to appointments with her. I loved being somebody she reached for when she was tired or uncomfortable, and I was already ridiculously attached to the person growing inside her.

I wanted that child. Not in a possessive, "it's mine" kind of way. I wanted the family we talked about. I also wanted to know what it would feel like to carry one myself.

I finally brought it up in early December.

We were in bed on a Sunday morning, enjoying the rare luxury of having nowhere we needed to be. Robbie had taken Lady out and come back with coffee. Kat was beside me, wearing one of his shirts and scrolling through something on her phone while I lay against his chest. For a while, I watched his fingers move slowly over my shoulder. Then I sat up.

"Can we talk about something?"

Kat put her phone down. Robbie shifted against the pillows so he could look at me properly.

"Of course, Mi Vida."

I took a breath.

"I've been thinking about stopping my birth control."

Kat's eyes widened slightly. Robbie's hand stayed against my back, but it stopped moving.

"To try?" he asked.

"Yeah."

Saying it out loud made my stomach flutter. I looked between them, suddenly aware of how much I wanted the answer even though I'd spent several days telling myself I would understand if they thought we should wait.

"I don't mean we have to start timing everything or turning sex into homework so we can be doing it at peak ovulation time or whatever," I added. "Just stop taking it and see what happens. If you're both okay with that."

Kat moved closer. "How long have you been thinking about it?"

"A while. More seriously the last few weeks."

I told them about thinking back to the negative test. About how I'd felt then, and how much clearer those feelings seemed now. Neither of them interrupted. Robbie kept his hand against my back while Kat rested hers over mine.

"I'm happy about your baby," I told her. "I don't want you thinking this means I need my own before I can feel part of everything."

"Honey, I don't think that."

"I just wanted to say it."

She squeezed my fingers.

"I want a child with you," I said, looking at Robbie. "And I want to raise them with both of you. I keep picturing it, and I don't want to keep pretending I only mean eventually."

His expression softened.

"I want that too, Mi Vida."

I smiled before I could help it. Then I looked at Kat.

She smiled back. "So do I."

I leaned over and kissed her. She held my cheek when I started to pull away.

"But we should talk about the timing."

"Yeah," I said. "We should."

We stayed there for most of the morning. We talked about what would happen if I got pregnant quickly, and what it might mean to have two babies so close together. Kat would be due near the end of March. Depending on how things went, I could be dealing with early pregnancy while she was finishing hers, then be further along with a newborn in the house.

There would be work to arrange. More help to hire at The Bowery. More conversations about what we needed from each other. Robbie listened while we talked, then rubbed a hand over his face.

"I don't want to sound like I'm trying to talk you out of it."

"You don't," I told him.

"I just want us to be honest about how much we'll have going on."

Kat nodded. "Me too."

"I'm not imagining it'll all be matching pajamas and cute pictures," I said.

"That's disappointing," he said. "I was counting on the pajamas."

I laughed and leaned against him.

"I know there'll be difficult parts. I know you can't just magically be in two places at once because we both want something."

"Unfortunately."

"And if we need help, we get help," Kat said. "We've already been talking about doing that."

I nodded. Then I looked at Robbie.

"How are you feeling about being a dad now?"

He took a moment before answering.

"Still nervous."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. But I'm talking about it more."

He was. He'd found somebody to help him work through the things that kept coming up about his parents, and he'd stopped trying to make every admission of fear end with a promise that he was fine. Sometimes he wanted to tell us about an appointment afterward. Sometimes he wanted to sit quietly for a while. We were getting better at letting him do either.

"I want this," he said, looking at me. "I don't want being scared to make the decision for me."

I put my hand against his cheek.

"I don't either."

Kat leaned her head against his shoulder. For a little while, we sat there without trying to solve anything else. By the end of the morning, we had agreed. Whatever happened would happen. When Robbie kissed me, I held on to him a little longer than usual. Kat's hand moved over my back, and I turned to kiss her too.

I had thought saying it would make me nervous. Mostly, it made me happy. I had timed the conversation so it was right before my birth control ran out. I decided right then that I would just not get the refill.

Christmas was wonderful. Lillian came over early enough to have breakfast with us, and Angel arrived from the pool house carrying presents and complaining about the cold. Robbie made coffee while Kat sat beside the tree with Lady's head in her lap, looking at a pile of gifts that had become considerably larger than anybody intended.

Most of them were for somebody who wasn't even here yet.

"Mom," Kat said, holding up another little outfit.

Lillian looked innocent.

"What?"

"How many clothes do you think one baby needs?"

"I expect we'll find out."

I had no room to judge. I'd bought tiny shoes with absolutely no practical purpose beyond making me happy when I looked at them.

We called my parents later that morning. Mom asked to see what Kat had gotten for the baby, and Dad wanted to know whether Robbie had put the crib together yet.

"Not yet."

"Read the directions."

"I will."

"Before you start."

Kat laughed so hard she had to put her drink down.

I didn't tell them we were trying. I wanted that to belong to us for a while, and I didn't know how long it would take. I had prepared myself for months, possibly longer. After years of making a deliberate effort not to get pregnant, it seemed unreasonable to expect my body to immediately understand that we'd changed our minds.

For the first couple of weeks, I thought about it constantly. Then the holidays got busy, and I managed to stop wondering whether every minor sensation meant something. About a month and a half after our conversation, I was standing in the kitchen one morning when Robbie opened a container of leftovers.

I immediately turned away as the smell hit me. He looked up.

"You okay?"

"Please close that."

He did, without asking another question. I stood beside the sink for a minute, waiting for my stomach to decide whether it intended to embarrass me. Kat came in carrying her water.

"What happened?"

"Apparently, I hate chicken now."

She looked at me. I looked at her. Then I looked away because I wasn't ready to have that thought with an audience.

"Probably just need breakfast," I said.

Robbie was already reaching for the bread. I loved him. I also began doing some counting. I knew logically it could happen that fast; you could technically get pregnant missing the pill for a day or two, as Kat found out. For some reason, though, I didn't think it would happen so quickly.

I bought the test on my way home that afternoon. I told myself I wasn't going to make a big deal out of it. There were plenty of reasons to be tired in January. Plenty of reasons for my stomach to be unsettled. My cycle had only recently been left to manage itself again, and I had already learned how quickly I could convince myself of something by staring at a calendar.

Then I bought two boxes. I just wanted to be sure.

I got home before either of them and went upstairs. Lady followed me to the bathroom, where she lay in the doorway while I read the instructions even though I remembered them perfectly well.

The waiting was worse this time. Last time, I hadn't known what I wanted. This time, I did. When the timer went off, I picked up the test. I read the word on the tiny screen. Positive. The second timer went off, indicating it was time to check the second one. Positive.

I stared at it long enough that Lady lifted her head, apparently concerned by my sudden lack of movement. Then I sat on the edge of the tub.

"Oh, my God."

I looked down at my stomach. Nothing looked different. My jeans still fit. I'd spent half the day answering emails and getting irritated about an order without knowing there was something happening inside me. My hand settled beneath my shirt. I started crying.

Not because I was scared, although that was definitely in there somewhere. Mostly, I couldn't get past the fact that something I'd wanted so badly had happened, and I was the first person in the world who knew. For a few minutes, it was just me and that possibility. And Lady, who eventually got up and put her head on my knee.

"Yes," I told her, rubbing behind her ears. "This is going to complicate our lives a little bit, but it will all be okay, baby girl."

I waited until Kat and Robbie were both home.

That turned out to be harder than taking the test. I moved through the kitchen doing absolutely nothing useful while Kat told me about a conversation she'd had after I left the store. Robbie came in not long afterward, kissed us both, and went upstairs to change. Kat watched me put the same mug in the cupboard twice.

"Honey?"

I turned.

"What's going on?"

"Can we wait for him?"

Her eyes moved over my face. Then she put down her water.

"Okay."

By the time Robbie came back, I had taken the tests out of my bag and set them on the island. He stopped beside Kat. For a moment, nobody said anything. Then I laughed nervously.

"Good news. The chicken was innocent."

Kat covered her mouth.

"Cass!"

I nodded.

"Yeah."

She came around the island so quickly that I barely had time to put the test down before her arms were around me. Her stomach pressed between us, and I laughed against her shoulder while she held me.

"Oh, Honey."

"I know."

She pulled back, her hands still on my arms.

"You're pregnant!"

"I'm pregnant!"

"We're pregnant!" we said in unison.

Saying it to her made me cry again. She kissed my cheek, then moved aside as Robbie came closer. He looked down at the tests before lifting his eyes to mine.

"Hey, Mi Vida."

"Hey, Papi."

His hands settled against my face.

"You got your wish."

That was such a simple way to put it. It nearly undid me. I nodded, and he kissed me before pulling me against him. I held on to his shirt while Kat put her arms around us both.

For a while, we were very bad at having a conversation. We laughed. We cried. Robbie kept looking at me, then at the tests, then back at me as though he wanted to keep checking that the answer hadn't changed.

"You're doing better this time," I told him eventually.

"It's different when you see it coming."

"Yeah, I can see that."

Kat laughed against his shoulder.

When we finally sat down, I ended up between them with both of their hands resting against me. I told them when I'd taken the tests and how I'd felt when I looked at the first one.

"I wanted to call you," I admitted.

"You could have," Robbie said.

"I know. But you were both coming home, and I wanted this."

Kat kissed my temple.

"I'm glad you waited."

I leaned into her, then looked at Robbie.

"I'm going to be a mom."

His smile changed.

"Yeah, Chica."

I looked down at my stomach.

"Holy shit."

Kat laughed softly. "That part takes a while."

I went to my first appointment with Robbie. Kat stayed at the store, exactly as we'd talked about when she first found out she was pregnant. She kissed us both before we left, reminded me to ask whatever I wanted to ask, then looked at Robbie.

"Notes."

He held up his phone.

"I remember."

"Good."

I smiled, but I held on to her for another moment before letting go. By then, she was in her third trimester, and hugging her had become something we had to approach with a little more planning.

"Call me," she whispered.

"Immediately, my sweet."

I was about eight weeks along by the time we went in for the ultrasound in early February. That meant I had gotten pregnant pretty much immediately. I knew what I was supposed to expect. I'd seen Kat's pictures. I'd sat beside her at appointments and watched the screen while somebody explained what we were looking at. None of that made it feel ordinary when it was me on the examination table.

Robbie pulled his chair close and took my hand. I watched the image appear, trying to understand it before anybody had explained anything. The provider adjusted the picture. Then she smiled.

"Well, there they are."

I blinked.

"Wait... they?"

She smiled at us for a moment before nodding.

"Yup! Two babies."

Robbie's hand went still around mine. I looked at him. He looked at the screen. Then I looked back.

"Twins?"

"Yes."

She pointed them out, patiently showing us what she could see. One, then the other. I listened, nodded, and tried very hard to understand how there could be two people inside me when I'd barely gotten used to the idea of one.

Robbie leaned forward.

"Both of those?"

She smiled. "Both of those."

I started laughing. I couldn't help it.

"Holy fuck..."

He looked at me then, and the expression on his face made me laugh harder.

"Papi."

"I'm here."

"You look like you've left."

"My brain's making some adjustments."

"Apparently, so is my uterus."

He laughed then too, bending to kiss my forehead while I held his hand. When she showed us the cardiac activity for each baby, I stopped laughing. My eyes filled instead. Robbie wiped beneath one of his with his free hand, then asked a question I was very glad somebody had remembered to ask.

We had more to learn now. More appointments to plan for. Things they would be watching as the pregnancy progressed. I listened as carefully as I could. Mostly, I kept looking at the screen. There were two tiny little babies.

We video-called Kat from the truck. I couldn't wait until we got home, and I didn't think she would forgive us if we tried. She answered before I had decided how to say it.

"Well?"

I looked at Robbie. He was smiling helplessly beside me.

"Everything looked good."

Kat let out a breath.

"Okay. Good."

"And we found something out."

Her expression changed.

"What?"

I held up the picture. She leaned toward the screen.

"Cass?"

"There are two, my sweet."

She stared. Then she looked away from the phone and said, very clearly, "Oh my God!"

Robbie laughed.

"Yeah. That was pretty much our response."

"Twins?"

"Twins."

She put a hand over her mouth. When she looked back at us, her eyes were shining.

"Oh, Honey."

I started crying again.

"I know."

By the time we got home, she had abandoned whatever she'd been doing and met us in the kitchen. She hugged me first, then Robbie, then demanded to see the picture somewhere she could hold it still. She sat at the island while we stood on either side of her.

"Three," she said.

I nodded.

"Three babies."

Robbie rubbed a hand over his face, smiling.

"Apparently."

I leaned against him and cuddled into his chest. He smiled and kissed my head.

Lillian came over that evening. She stared at the ultrasound picture for a moment, then reached for me.

"Oh, darling."

I went into her arms, suddenly much closer to crying than I'd expected to be. She held me without immediately asking anything, and I was grateful for the chance to simply stand there. When she drew back, she looked at my face.

"How are you feeling?"

"Happy. Overwhelmed. Slightly outnumbered."

She laughed softly.

"I imagine so."

Kat came to stand beside us. "We're going to need more help than we thought."

"Yes," Lillian said. "You probably are."

There was something reassuring about how easily she said it. She didn't pretend it would all be simple, and she didn't make it sound like we'd made some terrible mistake. Then she touched my cheek.

"We'll work it out."

I hadn't realized how much I wanted to hear her say that. Angel's reaction involved considerably more profanity, but it was still happy and excited. Once she calmed down, she looked at the picture, then at my stomach, then at Kat.

"There are going to be three babies in this house?"

"Eventually," I said.

She sat down. Robbie handed her a drink.

"Thank you."

"You looked like you might need it."

"I was prepared to be the fun aunt. I think I'll be up to the task!"

Angel looked back at the picture. Her expression softened, and when she lifted her eyes to mine again, they were wet.

"You're really having babies."

"Yeah, Manita."

She got up and hugged me. I held on.

I wanted to tell my parents while I still felt more excited than nervous about it. We arranged a video call the following weekend. Angel came over, and the four of us sat in the living room while I got the pictures ready. Robbie sat beside me, Kat on my other side, with Angel close enough to lean into the camera.

Mom answered and called Dad over.

"Everybody's there," she said.

"We have news," I told her.

Dad pulled up a chair.

"Good news?"

I smiled.

"Very good."

I held up the picture. For a second, he simply looked at it. Then his eyes lifted to mine.

"Cassie?"

I nodded.

"I'm pregnant!"

His face changed immediately.

"Oh, kiddo!"

He laughed, covering his mouth for a moment before looking at Robbie.

"Congratulations!"

"Thank you, Larry."

"And there's more," I said.

Dad looked back at me. I pointed at the picture.

"There are two."

He stared.

Then he sat back and laughed so loudly that Angel started laughing too.

"Twins?"

"Twins."

"Jesus, Cassie."

"Yeah. Apparently, we're being efficient."

He wiped beneath one eye, still smiling, and started asking questions. How far along I was. How I'd been feeling. Whether everything had looked all right. I answered him, waiting for Mom to say something.

She hadn't smiled. Eventually, Dad noticed too.

"Maria?"

She looked at me.

"Was this planned?"

The question wasn't especially strange. The way she asked it was.

"We decided we wanted to try."

"While Katarina is pregnant."

Kat's hand settled against my knee.

"Yes," she said. "We talked about it together."

Mom looked down for a moment. Dad's smile faded. I put the picture on the table.

"Mama?"

She lifted her eyes.

"I tried, Cassie."

Something cold moved through my stomach.

"I have tried to listen. I have tried to keep my concerns to myself. But this..." She shook her head. "I cannot pretend this is all right."

Nobody spoke for a moment. I could feel Robbie beside me, his hand warm around mine.

"We're happy, Mom."

"I can see that."

"Then could you try to be happy for us?"

Her mouth tightened.

"Having children doesn't make this a family."

Kat went very still beside me. Dad turned toward Mom.

"Maria, stop."

"No. There are children involved now."

"There was already a child involved," Kat said.

"And I was concerned about that too."

I looked at my mother, waiting for some sign that she could hear herself. She kept looking from me to Robbie, then toward Kat's stomach, as though everything she'd agreed not to say had been gathering somewhere until this moment.

"I'm not calling to ask whether you approve," I said. "I wanted to tell you because you're my mom."

"And I am trying to act like a mother should."

"Then ask me how I'm feeling and be supportive, not this."

Her eyes filled.

"Do you think getting pregnant makes you his wife too?"

The room went quiet. Robbie leaned forward.

"Maria..." Kat and I immediately recognized the strain in his voice as Robbie struggled to contain his anger. She ignored him.

"Katarina gets the marriage. You get to have his children and to pretend there isn't a difference."

"There isn't a difference in how much they're loved," he said.

Mom gave a sharp, disbelieving laugh.

"Of course that's what you would say."

Dad stood.

"Enough."

"No, Larry. I will not be made to celebrate this. She is choosing to live like a whore, and now she's bringing two bastard children into it."

For a second, I couldn't move. Then I put my hand against my stomach. It was such a small movement. I didn't decide to do it. She saw it.

"Cassandra, you can't..."

"No." My voice sounded strange to me. Quiet, but steady. "You do not get to speak about our children that way."

"I am trying to make you understand what..."

"Oh, I understand you."

Robbie's hand tightened around mine. Kat moved closer, but neither of them interrupted.

"I understood you the first time you called me a slut. I understood you when you said you were sorry. And I believed you when you promised it wouldn't happen again."

Tears slipped down my face. I wiped them away.

"I wanted my mother to be happy for me. That's all I wanted from this call."

Mom's expression changed.

"Mija..."

"Don't."

The word came out harder.

"You don't get to call me that right after calling my babies something so disgusting."

Angel leaned forward.

"And you don't get to tell her she's misunderstanding you."

Mom looked at her.

"Angelica, this is between your sister and me."

"No. I heard you too."

"I am still your mother."

Angel's eyes filled, but her voice didn't shake.

"Then you should know how much I love my sister."

Dad had one hand braced against the table. He looked furious in a way I had rarely seen. I took a breath.

"I'm done, Mom."

She stared at me.

"I'm not going to keep letting you back in so you can do this again. You won't be part of my and my children's lives. I don't want you calling me or contacting me in any way."

"Cassandra, you cannot mean that."

"I do."

Angel reached for my hand.

"And don't call me to complain about her. I'm done with you too."

Mom turned toward Dad.

"Larry, say something."

He looked at her for a long moment.

"Those are our daughters."

"They are being..."

"No. You don't get another sentence about what they're doing wrong."

He turned back to the screen. His expression softened when he looked at me.

"Cassie, I love you. I'm happy about your babies, as a grandfather should be."

I pressed my lips together.

"Thank you, Papa."

"I'll call you later, okay?"

I nodded.

Then I ended the call. For a while, I sat there looking at the phone. I had expected to feel devastated. I was devastated. But underneath it was something harder, something that wouldn't let me start making excuses for her. She had looked at a picture of my children and found something cruel to call them.

I didn't know how to come back from that.

Robbie moved in front of me and crouched down.

"Chica."

I looked at him.

"I wanted her to be happy."

His expression nearly undid me.

"I know, Mi Vida."

Kat put her arm around my shoulders. Angel was crying quietly beside us, and I reached for her before finally letting myself fall apart. They stayed. Nobody told me not to cry. Nobody tried to make me see the good intentions my mother would probably insist she'd had.

When I could speak again, I looked at my sister.

"You don't have to stop talking to her because I am."

Angel wiped her face.

"That isn't why I'm doing it."

"But..."

"No, Cass. I'm not being loyal for the afternoon. I heard what she said, and I don't want to have someone willing to treat their child that way."

I nodded. She leaned against me, and I held her.

Dad called that evening. He was sitting in his truck outside a hotel. For a moment, I simply stared at the screen.

"Papa?"

"I'm all right."

"Why are you at a hotel?"

He rubbed a hand over his face. He looked exhausted.

"Your mother and I talked after you hung up."

I sat down. Robbie came beside me without saying anything.

"What happened?"

"I told her I wouldn't keep doing this."

Dad looked away briefly, then back at me.

"She thinks I should help her make you understand. I told her I understood you perfectly well."

My throat tightened.

"She's my wife, Cassie. I love her. But I won't lose my daughters because she thinks being cruel to them is a duty."

"Did you leave?"

"For now."

"Papa..."

He shook his head.

"I'm not asking you to tell me what to do. And I'm not asking you to speak to her so this can be easier for me."

I started crying again.

"I didn't want this."

"I know you didn't."

His voice softened.

"This isn't something you did to us, kiddo. Your mother has to make her own choices. If she chooses to continue looking at you and talking to you this way, then she shall be choosing not to have a husband."

We talked for a long time. Not only about Mom. He asked about the appointment again. Asked whether we needed anything. Asked if Angel was still with us, and when she came over to the phone, he told her he loved her too. Before we hung up, he asked me to send him the picture.

"The one with both of them."

I laughed through my tears.

"Yeah, Papa. I will."

The weeks afterward were difficult, but they weren't empty. Mom called. She left messages. I listened to enough of the first one to understand that she still thought the problem was how badly we had taken what she said. I didn't listen to the rest.

Angel blocked her number before I did. When I finally did it, I sat with the phone in my hand for a long time afterward. Then Kat came into the bedroom, saw my face, and sat beside me.

"Want company?"

I nodded.

She leaned against me, and I rested my head against hers. We stayed there until Robbie called up to ask whether either of us wanted dinner. I was hungry. For some reason, realizing that helped.

Dad came to visit later that month. He stayed in a guest room and helped Robbie move furniture while Kat supervised from a chair and accused both of them of pretending not to need the directions.

He wasn't fine. Sometimes I caught him looking at his phone with an expression I understood too well. But he was there. Lillian invited him over to see the condo, gave him coffee, and didn't ask questions he hadn't offered to answer. I loved her for that.

By March, our appointments and preparations had become more complicated, but also more exciting. I had two babies to watch on the screen. Kat had one who seemed increasingly determined to occupy every available inch of her.

She stood beside my desk one afternoon with both hands beneath her stomach.

"I used to be able to walk upstairs without making a sound."

"You still can."

"No, I can't. I heard myself."

I laughed and held out my hand. She came around the desk and leaned against me.

"How are you feeling, Honey?"

"Better today."

"Good."

I looked up at her.

"How are you?"

"Ready to meet this person and have some of my internal space back."

I kissed her stomach, then her mouth.

"Fair."

We hired more help at the store and started letting the managers take over things we had been unnecessarily holding on to. That second part proved considerably more difficult.

Lillian helped us look through the plans we'd been putting off. We finally sat down with people who knew more than we did about making sure our family was protected and worked through the arrangements we'd promised ourselves we would handle before children. Some of it was tedious. I liked having it done.

At home, there were tiny clothes in places that had once held spare bedding. Robbie had assembled furniture, checked it, then checked it again. Angel took pictures of Kat and me standing sideways in the kitchen, laughing when we argued about who had made the more dramatic change.

"You're both very pregnant," she told us. "Can we move on?"

"Rude," Kat said.

"Accurate."

Robbie insisted on a picture with his hands resting against both of our stomachs. When Angel showed it to him, he went quiet. I leaned against his side.

"You good, Papi?"

He nodded.

"Yeah."

Kat kissed his cheek.

He pulled us both closer.

Kat's baby arrived near the end of March.

By then, I was about fifteen weeks along, far enough into my own pregnancy that I'd begun getting a little of my energy back. I was grateful for it. Watching somebody you love go through labor is exhausting in ways I hadn't understood.

I stayed where Kat wanted me. Sometimes that meant holding her hand. Sometimes it meant giving her room while somebody explained what needed to happen next. Robbie stayed close, helping her move, listening when she told him what she needed, letting her lean on him.

He was scared. I could see it. He stayed anyway. Then there was a cry, and suddenly the person we'd spent months imagining was there. On Kat's chest. Real.

We heard the doctor say, "Congratulations! It's a boy!"

She looked at him and at Robbie and said, "Hello, my sweet little Victor!"

I stood beside the bed with my hand over my mouth while Robbie bent over them both. Kat looked exhausted and overwhelmed and happier than I had ever seen her.

Then she reached for me.

"Cassie."

I went to her immediately. For a while, all I could do was touch her hair and look at the tiny face against her chest.

"You did it, my sweet."

She laughed weakly.

"Yeah."

Robbie kissed her forehead, then mine. His eyes were wet. Mine were too. Once they had him cleaned off, they had Robbie take his shirt off and hold Victor as well. The skin contact was very important according to the nurses. I suddenly was very appreciative that I had chosen to wear a loose-fitting top that was designed to hang off one shoulder.

Watching Robbie hold his son was almost surreal. This man that we loved was almost always paying attention to everything and everyone around him, restless beyond belief, and suddenly he was focused on his baby. The baby also looked so small in his arms. Watching Robbie melt over this tiny child was beyond sweet.

When I finally held the baby, I sat very still. I had loved this child for months. I hadn't realized how much more there could be once I had somebody to look at.

"Hey, little one," I whispered.

A tiny hand moved against the blanket. I smiled through my tears.

"I'm really glad to meet you."

He opened his eyes for a moment, and I looked down into the smallest, sleepiest face I had ever seen. Robbie sat beside me with one hand resting against my shoulder while Kat watched us from the bed. Victor made a little sound, moved his mouth against the edge of the blanket, and settled again.

"Comfortable?" Robbie asked softly.

I nodded without looking away.

"Very."

Kat smiled. "Good. Because I think he likes you."

"He has excellent taste."

Robbie laughed quietly, then leaned over to kiss the side of my head. I looked up at him, at the happiness on his face, and felt my throat tighten again. I had watched him imagine becoming a father for months. Now his son was asleep in my arms, and he looked like he wanted to memorize everything about it.

Eventually, a nurse came back to help Kat feed him. I handed Victor to Robbie, who settled him against her before helping her get comfortable. Neither of them quite knew what they were doing yet. There were adjustments, questions, and a moment when Kat looked ready to apologize for not immediately knowing how to do something she had never done before. The nurse stopped her before she could.

"You're both learning."

Kat looked down at Victor, then nodded. Robbie stayed beside her, listening carefully enough that I knew we would be hearing some of that advice again later. Lillian came in once Kat felt ready for visitors. She stopped just inside the door when she saw them, her bag slipping slightly down her arm. For a moment, she didn't move.

"Mom," Kat said softly.

That got her across the room. She kissed Kat's forehead, held her face for a moment, then looked down at the baby.

"Victor," Kat told her.

Lillian pressed her lips together. Her hand moved to her daughter's hair, smoothing it back before she bent to kiss her again.

"He would have been so happy for you."

Kat nodded, crying now too. Robbie stood to give her room, but she caught his hand before he could move away.

"Congratulations, sweetheart."

He bent when she reached for him. I watched her hug him, then watched him carefully place his son in her arms a few minutes later. She sat beside Kat's bed and looked at Victor for a long time. I leaned against Robbie while Kat watched her mother become a grandmother. His arm came around me, his hand settling against my stomach. One of the twins moved beneath it, and his eyes dropped immediately.

"Somebody has an opinion," he whispered.

"Already taking after me."

He smiled and kissed me.

Taking Victor home felt considerably more significant than leaving the hospital with one extra person should have.

Robbie checked the car seat, then checked it again while I stood beside him holding the instructions. Kat waited with Victor, watching us discuss something we had already practiced at home.

"Papi."

He looked at me.

"He's not grading us."

"I'd prefer to get this one right anyway."

"Fair."

Once Victor was settled, Kat climbed into the back beside him. I took the passenger seat and turned around approximately every thirty seconds for the entire drive. Robbie drove like every other person on the road had recently failed a basic competency test.

When we got home, Angel opened the door before we reached it.

"There he is."

"Hello to you too," Kat said.

"I love you all. Now, please... move," she said with a laugh.

She didn't, of course. She hugged Kat carefully, then stepped back while Robbie carried Victor inside. Lady came over with considerably more curiosity than enthusiasm, apparently uncertain what we had brought home or why everybody thought it was so important. Robbie crouched beside her while I sat with Victor.

"Easy, girl."

She sniffed his blanket, looked at him, then looked at Robbie.

I laughed.

"Yeah. We're keeping him."

Lady settled near my feet while the rest of us stood around looking at the baby. There were bags to unpack, things to put away, and lunch somewhere in the kitchen courtesy of Lillian. For several minutes, nobody did any of it.

Kat sat beside me and rested her head against my shoulder. Robbie stayed on my other side, one hand resting on the back of the couch.

"We brought home a person," Kat said.

"Seems irresponsible of them to let us," I replied.

Robbie laughed, but his eyes stayed on Victor. Kat reached over and touched her son's cheek.

"Hi, baby. Welcome home."

The first couple of weeks were wonderful and exhausting in ways that did not cancel each other out.

Victor had very strong opinions about being hungry. He also disliked getting changed, regularly objected to being put down, and made an astonishing amount of noise for somebody who couldn't speak.

Robbie became very good at carrying on a conversation while walking slowly around the room with his son against his chest. Sometimes Victor fell asleep almost immediately. Sometimes he continued loudly explaining his dissatisfaction while Robbie listened.

"I hear you, buddy."

"You can't know what he's saying," Kat told him one evening.

"No, but he seems pretty certain."

I laughed from the couch while she leaned against me, tired enough that she had closed her eyes halfway through answering a question.

We learned quickly that taking care of Victor also meant paying attention to each other. Kat could spend an entire feeding thinking about what he needed and forget she had been hungry before she sat down. Robbie could insist he was handling things, then lose track of what he was doing because he hadn't slept enough. I was perfectly capable of both.

One afternoon, I came downstairs and found Robbie holding Victor while staring into an open cupboard.

"What are you looking for?"

He looked at me.

"For fuck's sake, I do not remember."

I took Victor from him.

"Go sit down, Papi."

"I'm okay."

"Excellent. Be okay horizontally on the couch for a while."

He opened his mouth, then looked down at his son in my arms.

"Okay, for a few minutes."

"Start there."

He kissed us both before going to the couch. When Kat came down a little later, she found me in the armchair with Victor asleep against my chest.

"Where's Robbie?"

"Sleeping," I said, pointing to the couch.

"Good."

She sat beside me, tucked one leg beneath her, then leaned over to look at the baby. For a while, we simply watched him.

"You okay, my sweet?"

"Yeah." She brushed a finger over his little hand. "Tired."

"I've heard that happens."

She smiled faintly, then looked at me.

"Thank you for making him go lie down."

"Somebody has to be the unreasonable one."

"He trusts you with him."

I looked down at Victor.

"I know."

It had taken me a while to understand how much that would mean. Neither of them hovered when I picked him up. They didn't wait for me to give him back or treat every little thing I learned about him like an amusing contribution from somebody visiting.

If I said he'd been awake for a while and was getting tired, they listened. When Kat needed to shower, she handed him to me without thinking and went upstairs.

That was the family we had talked about. We were learning how to be it.

There were difficult moments too.

One night, I woke to Victor crying through the monitor and found Kat sitting on the edge of the bed before I had even worked out what time it was. She pressed a hand against her face.

"Fuck."

Robbie sat up.

"I'll get him."

"He'll want to eat."

"I can still get him."

She nodded, and he went.

I moved closer while she adjusted the pillows behind her. For a moment, she looked at the doorway, then down at her hands.

"I'm so tired, Cass."

"I know, Honey."

"I love him..."

"I know that too."

Her eyes filled.

"I don't want to dread hearing him because I know I have to wake up again."

I put my arms around her, and she leaned against me.

"You need sleep. That doesn't mean anything bad about how much you love him."

She nodded against my shoulder. When Robbie came back, I helped her get settled while he brought Victor to her. He listened when she told him what she'd just told me, then stayed beside her until the feeding was finished.

Afterward, I took Victor while Robbie helped Kat lie down. We worked out the next stretch of the night in quiet voices, without asking her to supervise it. Later, when I finally returned to bed, she reached for me before I was fully beneath the covers.

"Thank you."

I kissed her forehead.

"Sleep, my sweet."

She did.

There were nights when it was Robbie who needed somebody else to take over. He had started recognizing those moments sooner. Once, he came into the bedroom carrying Victor, his expression strained.

"I... I just need a minute."

Kat held out her arms.

"Come here, baby boy."

I watched Robbie hand him over, then sit beside me and lean forward with his elbows on his knees.

"He's been crying for forty minutes."

"I heard."

"I've checked everything."

I rested my hand against his back.

"Go get some water."

He looked at me.

"We've got him, Papi."

He nodded and went downstairs.

When he came back, he sat beside Kat and rested his head against her shoulder while she held their son. Victor was still making unhappy little sounds. Robbie kissed the top of his head anyway.

I remembered him sitting beside the fire pit, frightened of what he might become when he was exhausted and couldn't make things better. I moved closer and took his hand. He looked at me, and I smiled. He squeezed my fingers.

It took time, but we all learned to deal with all the things as time went on. We learned very quickly that our arrangement was a blessing. Even if we did talk about needing extra help when the twins were born.

By late April, I had enough of a bump that people had begun noticing without me having to mention it.

Victor was still tiny, but he had already changed so much. He was more awake when we talked to him. He watched Robbie cross the room. Sometimes he looked at Kat like he was trying very hard to understand everything about her face.

I could relate. My detailed ultrasound appointment came with its own excitement. Kat came to that one. Lillian stayed with Victor, and Robbie drove us while I tried to act like I hadn't been looking forward to it for weeks. We had already decided we wanted to know. I had been patient through enough surprises.

When they told us one was a boy and the other was a girl, I turned toward Robbie.

"One of each, Papi."

He laughed, his eyes still on the screen.

"Yeah, Chica."

Kat leaned closer to me and kissed my cheek.

"Oh, Honey."

I cried again. By then, nobody seemed particularly surprised by that. Knowing changed how I pictured them. They had already been real to me, but now I caught myself imagining a little boy and a little girl beside Victor. Three children in the backyard. Three sleepy faces at breakfast. Three people eventually explaining why whatever had happened had absolutely not been their fault.

I told Robbie that last part over lunch. He looked at Kat.

"We might be in trouble."

"Might?" she asked.

Choosing names took longer.

We talked about them at home, over meals, in bed, and once in the car when I rejected something so firmly that Robbie laughed before he could stop himself.

Eventually, Connor became the name we kept returning to for our boy.

For our girl, it was Luna.

I said them together one evening while we sat in the nursery.

"Connor and Luna."

Robbie stood beside the second crib, looking at me. I rested my hands against my stomach and tried again.

"Hi, Connor. Hi, Luna."

Kat smiled from the chair beside me.

"Those sound right."

They did. Robbie came over and crouched in front of me. He put his hands over mine, then looked up.

"You happy with those?"

I nodded.

"Really happy."

He kissed me, then glanced down at my baby bump.

"Good. Because your mom has rejected quite a few options."

Kat laughed.

I ran my fingers through his hair.

Mother's Day caught me off guard.

I knew it was coming. I had ordered something for Lillian and helped Robbie arrange a few things for Kat. I had also spent several days trying not to think about my own mother, with varying degrees of success. What I hadn't expected was a card waiting beside my breakfast.

I looked at it, then at Robbie.

"Papi."

"Open it."

Kat sat beside me holding Victor, smiling over his head.

The card was from the three of them. Robbie had written something about how much he loved watching me become a mother, then added that Victor had offered very little useful help with the wording.

Kat's part made me put it down for a moment.

Thank you for loving him the way you do. I'm so glad we get to do this together.

I looked at her.

"My sweet."

She shifted Victor carefully and held out her free hand.

"Happy Mother's Day, Honey."

I went to her, kissed her, then bent to kiss the baby. His little hand caught against my shirt, and I started crying in earnest.

Robbie put his arms around us from behind.

"I was aiming for happy tears."

"You succeeded, asshole."

He laughed against my hair.

Later, Lillian came over for lunch. Dad called, asked after the babies, then told me he loved me before the conversation had gone anywhere difficult.

I missed Mom that day. I still laughed at lunch. I held Victor while Kat opened her presents. I put my card somewhere I could see it. By evening, I had more to remember than the person who hadn't called.

As the weather warmed up, we spent more time outside. Victor liked being carried around the backyard, particularly when somebody narrated the experience like he was inspecting his property. Robbie was very good at that.

"That's the pool. You're not allowed in there without us."

Victor stared at him.

"Glad we understand each other."

I watched from the patio while Kat sat beside me, drinking something cold. Lady followed close behind them, apparently determined to contribute.

"He's giving him the full tour again," Kat said.

"He needs to know where things are."

"He can't hold his own head up for an entire tour yet."

"Then it's thoughtful of Papi to carry him."

She laughed and leaned against my shoulder.

My own energy had come back, but I discovered there were limits to how much I could do before my body objected. With two babies growing inside me, those limits seemed to move around without giving me much notice. Robbie learned the difference between offering help and assuming I needed it.

Usually.

One afternoon, he reached for a bag I was carrying, and I held it away from him.

"It contains socks."

"I can still carry it."

"I can carry socks."

Kat walked past us with Victor and smiled.

"Let her have the socks, baby."

He lifted both hands.

"All right."

I made it halfway upstairs before deciding I was tired of carrying anything at all.

"Papi?"

He appeared at the bottom.

"Yeah, Chica?"

I held out the bag. He came up without a word, took it, and kissed my cheek.

I narrowed my eyes.

"Very wise."

"I'm learning."

I caught his shirt before he could move away and pulled him into a proper kiss. His free hand settled against my waist, and for a few seconds, I forgot why we were standing on the stairs. When he pulled back, he was smiling.

"You need anything else?"

"Several things. Most of them can wait until later."

His eyes moved over my face.

"I look forward to hearing about them."

I liked that we still had that. There were stretches when everything seemed to be appointments, feeding schedules, laundry, and somebody asking where we'd put the clean sheets. But Robbie still kissed me when he came home. Kat still caught my hand when I walked past her.

Sometimes, after Victor was asleep, we managed an entire conversation that had nothing to do with children. Occasionally, we even finished it.

We went out together when Lillian or Angel stayed with him. We also made time for two of us to go while the other stayed home, because we had agreed those relationships still needed attention.

The first time Kat and Robbie went out for dinner after Victor was born, she checked her phone three times before they left the driveway. I sent her a picture of him sleeping against me.

Me: Your son has entrusted me with his demanding social schedule. Go eat.

She replied with a heart.

Then, a minute later, another message.

Her: Love you, Honey.

I smiled down at Victor.

"Your mom is ridiculous."

He made a little sound.

"Yes. Your dad too."

When they came home, Kat went straight to him. Robbie came to me first and bent to kiss me.

"How'd it go?"

"Very well. He was excellent company."

"Better than me?"

"Considerably less argumentative."

Kat looked up.

"He does get that from you, baby."

Robbie put a hand over his heart while I laughed.

Later, after we'd settled Victor, Kat climbed into bed beside me and rested her palm against my stomach. One of the twins moved. Her face changed immediately.

"There."

"I felt it."

She stayed very still, waiting. Then it happened again.

"Somebody's awake," she whispered.

"Somebody usually is."

She smiled and bent to kiss the curve beneath her hand. Robbie came out of the bathroom and stopped beside the bed, watching us. I held out my hand. He took it and came closer.

By July, I was considerably larger than I had ever expected to be. I knew there were two babies. I had seen them often enough that the evidence was difficult to dispute. Knowing did very little to make putting on shoes less irritating.

Kat watched me attempting it one morning until I looked up.

"You could help instead of enjoying this."

"I am enjoying it because you told me I was dramatic."

"I was uninformed."

"That was my argument."

Robbie came over, took the sandal from my hand, and knelt in front of me.

I rested a hand on his shoulder while he fastened it.

"My hero."

"Happy to help."

Kat leaned down to kiss the top of his head.

"You're very useful."

"I appreciate being valued."

I laughed, and one of the babies pressed hard enough beneath my ribs that I immediately stopped.

"Oh, absolutely not."

Robbie looked up.

"Everybody okay?"

"Somebody's redecorating."

He smiled and rested his hand where I pointed. Then his smile widened.

"Hey, little one."

I watched him for a moment. His hair had fallen forward, and there was a faint mark on his shirt where Victor had grabbed him with a wet hand at breakfast. He looked tired. He also looked happy. I brushed his hair back from his forehead.

"What?" he asked.

"Nothing, Papi."

Kat put her hand over mine on his shoulder. He looked between us, then leaned up to kiss me.

The final weeks involved more appointments, more questions, and a great deal more sitting than I preferred. We had a plan with the medical team. We knew there were things that might change it. I tried to take reassurance from both parts of that instead of deciding I needed to control which day every possibility might happen.

Some days, I was better at it than others.

One evening in August, I stood in the twins' room while Robbie put away the last of the clean clothes. Two cribs. Two places waiting for people I had never seen properly outside a screen.

I rested my hands against my stomach.

"I'm ready."

He looked over.

"To have them?"

I nodded.

Then I laughed nervously.

"And I'm also not."

He set the clothes down and came to me.

"That makes sense."

"Everybody keeps saying that."

"Annoying when we agree?"

"Extremely."

He put his arms around me, and I leaned against him as much as my stomach allowed.

"I know how to help with Victor now," I said quietly. "I can usually work out what he needs. I know where things are. We've got something that works."

He kissed my hair.

"And now I'm about to do it with two."

"Yeah."

"What if they both need me and I can't..."

I stopped. He drew back enough to look at me. It took me a second to realize why his expression had softened that way.

"Oh, fuck."

He smiled faintly.

"Familiar conversation?"

I nodded, my eyes burning. He brushed his thumb over my cheek.

"I'm not going to tell you there won't be moments when it feels like too much. But you don't have to handle those moments by yourself."

"I know."

"Tell me anyway."

I looked up at him.

"I'm scared, Papi."

"I know, Mi Vida."

He held me while I cried a little. When Kat found us, she put down the baby monitor she was carrying and came straight over.

"What happened?"

"I've decided to be nervous."

She wrapped her arms around me as well as she could.

"Terrible timing, Honey."

I laughed against her shoulder. She held me tighter.

Connor and Luna arrived toward the end of August. By then, I was a little over thirty-six weeks along, and my medical team had already made sure we understood how the delivery would be managed and what might need to change along the way.

I had asked questions. Robbie had asked more. Kat had helped me remember the ones I forgot. None of that stopped me from wanting both of them close once the day actually came.

Lillian stayed with Victor. Angel came over to help her, promised to keep us updated, then hugged me for so long that I finally laughed.

"Manita, I do need to go."

"I know."

She let go, wiped beneath her eyes, then pointed at Robbie.

"Call."

"I will."

"With details."

"The relevant ones."

She nodded.

"Fine."

At the hospital, everything became more immediate. There were people to meet, things to check, explanations I listened to more than once because I kept losing track of the middle. Robbie stayed beside me. Kat arrived after making sure everything was settled at home, and I felt something inside me ease when she took my other hand.

"You good, Honey?"

"I'm considering alternatives."

She smiled and kissed my forehead.

"Little late for that."

"Poor planning on my part."

There were moments later when I stopped finding anything funny. I needed them to listen when I said I was a little frightened. I needed Robbie to look at me instead of something happening across the room. I needed Kat to remind me what somebody had just explained without sounding worried herself.

They did. Then, before I knew it, Connor was here. I heard him before I could properly see him from behind the curtain. For a second, I couldn't understand how a sound could make everything else disappear.

"Our boy," Robbie said, his voice breaking.

I looked at him. He was crying openly, staring in the direction of our son before looking back at me.

"He is beautiful, Cass."

I smiled, crying too. They wiped him off and handed him to me, placing him on my skin. Then there was more to listen to. More to do. Kat's fingers stayed tight around mine while Robbie brushed my hair back and told me he was there. When Luna's cry joined her brother's, I started laughing through the tears.

Two. They were both here. I saw the tears fall down Robbie's face as he looked at our daughter for the first time. He had no words this time, quite the accomplishment. He just looked at her with a look of unmistakable adoration and love.

When I could finally look at them properly, I couldn't stop. Connor's little mouth moved. Luna made an offended sound at something somebody was doing nearby. Neither of them looked like an idea or a picture or the future anymore. They looked like my children.

Kat bent beside me, tears slipping down her cheeks.

"Oh, Cassie, they are so perfect."

I looked from him to her.

"We did it."

She kissed me.

"You did it, Honey."

Later, when both babies had been checked and we had a little room to breathe, I watched Robbie hold Luna against his bare chest. His daughter. His hand covered so much of her back that I had to look twice to see the edge of the blanket. She settled against him while he stared down at her, his face completely unguarded.

"Hello, Luna," he whispered.

I ran my fingers over Connor's tiny hand while Kat sat beside me. Robbie looked up at us. I had seen him happy. I had seen him overwhelmed. This was both, so completely that none of us tried to make a joke about it.

"Come here, Papi," I told him.

He moved his chair beside the bed. Kat leaned against me, her hand resting carefully over Connor's blanket, while I reached for Robbie. For a while, we simply looked at our children together.

I had thought seeing Victor with the twins would be sweet. I hadn't prepared for how much it would affect me. Once we were home, Kat sat beside me on the couch with Victor in her lap while Robbie settled Connor in my arms. Luna slept in the bassinet close enough that I could see her face.

Victor stared.

Then he leaned forward, as much as a baby his age could.

"Gentle, baby," Kat said softly, guiding his hand.

His fingers brushed the blanket. I looked down at Connor, then at Victor's fascinated little face, and started crying before anybody had said anything especially meaningful. Kat looked at me.

"Honey."

"I know."

She laughed softly, crying a little herself. Robbie crouched beside us and rested a hand on Victor's back.

"That's your brother, buddy."

Victor looked at him.

"And your sister's right there."

I reached for Robbie's hand and held it against Connor's blanket. Angel took a picture.

The first weeks with all three of them were busy enough that I occasionally forgot what I had been doing halfway through doing it. There were bottles, feeding times, appointments, and laundry that seemed to reproduce whenever we left the room. I was recovering, trying to learn two babies at once, and discovering that loving them equally did not make them behave like the same person.

Connor could be completely settled while Luna objected to everything. Then they would switch. Victor, meanwhile, remained very interested in his own schedule and saw no reason that the arrival of two additional people should interfere with it.

We made mistakes. We also got better. Robbie became skilled at handing me what I needed before I had finished asking for it. Kat could tell which twin had started fussing from the next room more reliably than I could. I learned that accepting somebody's offer to take over did not require me to first prove I had tried hard enough.

Lillian came over and asked what we needed that day instead of assuming it would be the same as yesterday. Angel held a baby while answering questions about her own life, occasionally pausing to inform whoever was in her arms that they were being an excellent audience.

Dad visited and spent an entire afternoon moving between grandchildren with the pleased, slightly overwhelmed expression of a man whose family had grown faster than he could keep up with.

One evening, he sat beside me holding Luna while I fed Connor.

"She looks like you," he said.

I glanced over.

"You think?"

He nodded.

"Especially when she's deciding whether she likes something."

I laughed.

"You still make that face."

I leaned against his shoulder for a moment. He kissed the top of my head without taking his eyes off his granddaughter. I was glad he was there.

There were quiet moments too. One night, I came downstairs and found Kat on the rug with Victor while Robbie sat nearby holding Luna. Connor was awake in my arms, making small, uncertain sounds as I settled onto the couch. Kat looked up.

"How are you feeling?"

"Better after the shower."

"Good."

Robbie reached for the water beside him and handed it to me before I could ask. I took a drink, then looked around the room. Victor was trying to grab something just beyond his reach. Kat moved it a little closer, encouraging him while he concentrated with extraordinary seriousness.

Luna slept against Robbie. Connor's hand rested against my chest.

For months, I had pictured what this might look like. I'd imagined the three babies together, the mess, the tiredness, the happiness. I hadn't known there would be moments when I could sit in the middle of all of it and feel so full that I needed a second before I could speak. Kat caught me looking.

"What?"

I shook my head.

Robbie smiled at me.

"That usually means something."

"Usually," I agreed.

Victor managed to get hold of the toy. Kat cheered softly, and he looked so pleased with himself that all three of us laughed. Then Connor began to fuss. I shifted him against me, but Robbie leaned forward.

"Want to trade?"

I looked at the sleeping baby against his chest.

"Risky offer."

"I trust you."

Kat looked up.

"I can take Connor."

"You're busy supervising an important athletic achievement," I told her.

"Clearly his father's child."

Robbie grinned. We moved carefully, helping each other until Connor was settled with Robbie and Luna lay warm in my arms. Kat leaned back against the couch beside my legs, Victor in her lap now, watching his father soothe his brother. I rested my hand against her shoulder.

She reached up and covered it with hers. Across from us, Robbie bent to kiss Connor's head. Then he looked at Kat, at Victor, at Luna and me. His smile made me smile back.

"Everybody good?" he asked.

Before either of us could answer, Victor made a loud, enthusiastic sound. Kat laughed and kissed his cheek.

"I think that's a yes."

I looked down at our daughter, then reached for Robbie's free hand.

"Yeah, Papi," I said. "We're good."

Luna shifted against me. Connor quieted beneath his father's hand. Kat stayed close enough that her hair brushed my wrist when she leaned back. We sat there together until somebody needed us to move.

I took a deep breath and realized that this was life now. Sure, things would get more complicated and there would be hard times down the road, but this was the start of our family and our life to come. I had never been more sure that I was happy and had never been more confident that everything was going to work out, that everything was happening as it was meant to be.

Twenty-Two Years Later

Robbie's POV

In the four years after Victor, Connor, and Luna were born, we added three more children to our family. Evelyn came first, giving Kat the daughter she had been quietly hoping for. Gloria followed, and Cassie spent several months looking at our second little girl like she still couldn't quite believe we got to keep her. Then Kat gave birth to our youngest son, whom she was determined to name after me. Since he was Robert Stockton III, we just called him Tre most of the time, unless he was in trouble.

That brought us to six.

Having another Robbie in the house took some getting used to. For several years, hearing my name from the kitchen could mean Kat wanted me, our son was in trouble, or both things had become necessary at once. I learned to pay attention to the tone before responding. I also learned there was something particularly humbling about recognizing my own expression on a small boy who was absolutely certain he had a reasonable explanation.

We stayed in our original house until all six children were born. The place I had once thought was ridiculously large had gradually filled with cribs, beds, toys, and an astonishing number of shoes that nobody could locate when we needed to leave. We loved that house. We had brought every one of our children home to it. But by the time our youngest arrived, we knew we wanted somewhere designed around the family we had actually become.

We found land nearby and built.

Kat cared about the light and where the books would go. Cassie cared about how the rooms connected and whether we could get everyone through a morning without creating a traffic problem outside the bathrooms. I cared about the kitchen, the yard, and having somewhere I could sit with both of them at the end of the day. All three of us had more opinions than the architect probably expected, but by the time we moved in, the place felt like ours.

We gave the children bedrooms they could grow into, put bookshelves wherever we could reasonably fit them, and made sure there was a table big enough for everybody. That table became the center of a remarkable amount of our lives. Homework, meals, birthday cakes, difficult conversations, and arguments about whether somebody had technically been touching somebody else all happened there.

Six children was a lot. I don't know a more elegant way to put it. We loved having them, wanted every one of them, and still occasionally stood in the middle of the kitchen trying to remember who had already eaten. We got better at planning. We got much better at asking for help. We also accepted that having a good plan didn't prevent somebody from throwing up on it five minutes before we needed to leave.

Ricky and Evan bought our old house after we moved, allowing Angel to stay in the pool house as long as she wished. By then, Ricky and Evan were married, and seeing my brother make a home there with his husband was something I never got tired of. There were memories in almost every room. Knowing we could still walk into that kitchen, still spend an afternoon by that pool, and find people we loved living happily there made leaving much easier.

The kids grew up treating their uncles' house as an extension of their own. Ricky and Evan encouraged that, occasionally more enthusiastically than I thought was wise. They were very good at being the adults who could be approached when a child needed advice but wasn't ready to bring the problem to one of us yet. I was grateful for that, even when I strongly suspected my brother enjoyed knowing something before I did.

Lillian retired and moved into her condo full time. She made the transition with more grace than Kat had expected and considerably more involvement in our lives than any of us could have imagined when we first moved to Pennsylvania. She came to school events, remembered appointment dates, and somehow knew when one of us needed a meal delivered without having to explain why.

Watching her with the children remained one of the great pleasures of my life. She could be practical, organized, and almost intimidatingly prepared, then spend an entire afternoon on the floor letting a grandchild explain something that made very little sense. Kat watched those moments carefully at first. Eventually, she stopped watching for what might go wrong and simply enjoyed seeing her mother there. I think that mattered to Lillian as much as it did to her.

Larry officially divorced Maria. Neither Cassie nor Angel resumed a relationship with her, and none of us tried to make the children responsible for repairing something they hadn't broken. There were years when that absence hurt more than others. Becoming a mother hadn't made Cassie stop wanting one of her own. She had days when an ordinary memory caught her off guard, and I learned that being happy with us didn't prevent her from grieving what she had lost.

Larry eventually met Lori. She came into our lives while the children were still young enough that she became part of growing up instead of somebody they met after it had already happened. She understood our family from the beginning. There was no careful omission of Cassie when she spoke about Kat and me, no uncertainty about whether she should include Kat when asking after Cassie's children. She accepted us, paid attention, and let her relationship with each of us develop without trying to force it.

Cassie and Angel both grew close to her. Kat did too. I liked her warmth, her sense of humor, and the fact that she could make Larry laugh in a way we hadn't heard nearly enough for a while. She loved him, and she understood how much his daughters and grandchildren mattered to him. Being part of that family seemed to make her happy. When they married, we were happy for both of them.

The kids called her Grandma. She earned that place through years of visits, birthday cakes, school events, and remembering which child needed a little extra encouragement without announcing that she was giving it. There was nothing reluctant about how she loved them. Watching Cassie become comfortable asking her for advice, or simply calling because she wanted to talk, meant a great deal to me.

Angel graduated and took the full-time position with Saul at Hearthstone. She had started by asking good questions over dinner and became somebody whose judgment both of us relied on. She worked hard, learned quickly, and developed an ability to find the problem in a set of numbers that saved us from more than one very expensive mistake.

She also remained completely unimpressed by the fact that I was technically her boss, even if I didn't act like it. Family dinners did very little to improve my authority, especially once the children realized their aunt could make me reconsider something with one raised eyebrow.

Hearthstone kept growing. Saul remained the person who understood how to keep the daily business moving while I became more involved in the decisions I could contribute to. We had good years, difficult decisions, and opportunities we were smart enough to leave alone. Over time, we built something substantial enough that our family's future was secure beyond anything I had once been able to imagine. Something I was very appreciative of when the kids were in high school. The boys had definitely inherited my size, and I was fairly certain I could drop a water buffalo in front of them, and they would devour it down to just bones in seconds.

My memories of worrying about rent, gas, and whether I could afford something going wrong belonged to the years before the accident. My financial circumstances had changed long before we started filling the house with children. Hearthstone helped us manage and grow what we had, turning resources I had initially struggled to comprehend into something that could support our family for the rest of our lives.

I thought about the accident differently as I got older. I still remembered what it had cost me. My knee occasionally insisted that I remember it whether I wanted to or not. But I could also look at the life that had followed and recognize how much good had come afterward. There were opportunities I hadn't expected, choices I could afford to make, and people I might never have met if my life had continued exactly as I had planned it. I had spent years adjusting to the future I lost. Eventually, I learned to appreciate how much I loved the one I got.

Kat and Cassie built something substantial of their own too. The Bowery succeeded because they understood what they wanted people to find there. Books mattered. So did the feeling of being welcome, the events upstairs, and the people behind the counter who remembered what a customer had liked last time. They worked at it. They hired people they trusted, learned when to step back, and opened another location once they were ready.

Then they opened more. I watched them study possibilities over dinner, argue through concerns at the kitchen table, and celebrate decisions that had taken months to make. They were good together. Kat could picture what a place might become, and Cassie could work out what needed to happen to make it function. They both learned enough from the other that, after a while, it became difficult to separate which part had started with whom.

When Frank and Jane finally retired, Kat and Cassie bought Henderson's. Going back there felt different once we were the ones bringing children through the door. The bell still sounded familiar. I knew the aisles well enough that my body seemed to remember where to turn before I thought about it. There were places in that store where I could still see Kat as she had been when we were young, smiling at me between shelves while I tried to pretend I wasn't already completely gone for her. They kept the name.

They made the changes the business needed and took care of the things that had worn down, but they understood what people loved about it. Seeing our children sit with books in the place where so much of our life had begun affected me more than I expected. Frank had given me a job when I needed one. He and Jane had given me considerably more than that afterward. I liked knowing the store would stay in hands that understood the difference.

My own career changed. I loved teaching. I loved the moment when a student who had been certain they couldn't understand something finally did. I loved coaching too, and for a while, I thought I would stay at Stonebridge until somebody made me retire.

As the years went by, people learned more about our family. Most were decent about it. Some were curious, some were awkward, and some had opinions they felt entitled to bring into my professional life. The whispers became meetings, explanations, and a growing awareness that the way I lived at home had started occupying time I wanted to spend working with students.

I could have kept fighting through it. For a while, I did. Eventually, I realized I was spending too much energy defending a life I loved to people who weren't interested in understanding it.

Leaving teaching hurt. Having the financial freedom to leave didn't make me care less about the work or the students. But it gave me room to decide what I wanted next.

I opened a wrestling academy. The Stockton Academy of Wrestling. I know, an incredibly creative name. In all honesty, the ability to brand a wrestling club and academy as the S. A. W. did make for some good marketing.

At first, I wanted a place where I could keep coaching and build the kind of environment I believed young athletes needed. We taught technique, conditioning, and how to handle losing without deciding it meant something permanent about who you were. We also taught them how to win without becoming somebody nobody wanted to be around.

The academy grew faster than I expected. We brought in more coaches, expanded our programs, and developed a reputation I was proud of. I still spent my days teaching. I still got to watch somebody learn to trust what they could do. I had also gained more control over my schedule and the freedom to be present for my own children. It turned out to be very close to the best of both worlds.

Before long, our own children were among the athletes keeping us busy. All three boys played football. All three girls played softball. There were stretches when the calendar on our refrigerator looked like an attempt to coordinate a small military operation, and I still occasionally found a piece of equipment in my truck without having any real idea which child had left it there.

Victor practically grew up on the mats. I tried to be careful about that. Loving wrestling myself didn't entitle me to decide he would love it too, and I wanted him to know he could choose something else without disappointing me.

He chose wrestling. Then he became very fucking good at it. He won state three years in a row. I watched him earn every one of those titles, through the practices nobody applauded, the losses he hated, and the days when being my son seemed to make him feel like he needed to prove something extra. Those times rolling on the mat and wrestling with him, Connor, Luna, and Tre are some of the best memories I have. Learning when to coach him and when to simply be his dad was harder than teaching any technique I knew. Kat and Cassie helped with that. So did Victor.

Luna decided early that there was no reason the boys should get the mats to themselves. She was determined, competitive, and deeply unimpressed by anybody who underestimated her. I recognized enough of Cassie in that to know arguing would be a poor use of my time. She won state all four years on the girls' team. I was proud enough to be embarrassing, and I made very little effort to hide it. Watching my daughter have her hand raised affected me differently than winning ever had when it was me. I knew how much work she had done. I also remembered holding her against my chest when my hand had covered most of her back.

She brought plenty of that same determination to softball. All three girls enjoyed playing, and some of my favorite afternoons involved sitting beside their mothers, watching one daughter on the field while another leaned against us eating something she had insisted she wasn't hungry enough to want ten minutes earlier.

Connor found his place on a football field. As a running back, he had an instinct for finding space and the confidence to commit to it. He became the kind of player people came to watch, which was exciting and occasionally made it difficult for me to sit down. Cassie accused me of trying to coach from the stands more than once. She was usually right.

Victor and Tre enjoyed football too, but Connor was the one who excelled at it. Watching his brothers celebrate him was its own pleasure. They could be competitive as hell at home, over things considerably less important than football, then become his loudest supporters when it mattered.

Tre wrestled throughout high school and placed at state all four years, winning the title once. I watched him work through the frustration of coming close, go back to practice, and learn how to assess a loss without turning it into a judgment on himself. When he finally won, his siblings were nearly as difficult to contain as I was.

His greatest passion, though, was weightlifting. He loved the work of it. Learning how to move properly, building strength, tracking progress, and coming back to something that had been too heavy before. He became interested in the details, asked thoughtful questions, and eventually started teaching me things he had learned. I liked being able to share that with him. I also liked seeing him find something he loved enough to keep studying without anybody reminding him.

Evelyn and Gloria found their place in theater as well as on the softball field.

After years of gyms, whistles, and athletic bags, I discovered I could become just as invested in opening night. We sat through rehearsals, helped with lines, and learned that the last week before a performance could make the entire household feel like it was preparing for a significant weather event.

Watching them step onto a stage was its own kind of nerve-racking. There was nothing I could do once they were out there, no advice worth giving from the audience, and absolutely no useful reason to be holding my breath. I did it anyway. They were wonderful.

Evelyn had Kat's gift for writing. She could notice something small about a person and put it into words that made me realize I had noticed it too without knowing how to explain it. She wrote for the school paper, contributed to the literary magazine, and started bringing home recognition from student writing competitions.

Her interest in theater eventually found its way into her writing as well. Seeing something she had written performed by other students was one of those moments when I looked over and found Kat crying before I had even realized I was getting emotional myself. I was proud of Evelyn's work. I was just as proud that she had been willing to let other people see it.

Gloria was exceptional at math. I liked to think I had always been reasonably good with numbers. Helping her with homework eventually required me to reconsider how far that confidence should extend. She joined the math team, competed, and developed a patience for explaining her reasoning that I admired almost as much as the reasoning itself.

Angel took a particular interest in that part of her life. Sometimes I found them at the kitchen table working through a problem long after I would have expected either of them to get bored. Gloria could spend an afternoon preparing for a math competition and the evening at rehearsal, then come home wanting to tell us about both. I loved that she never seemed to think she needed to choose which kind of person that made her.

Having children with different interests made our schedules complicated, but we figured it out. We took turns, drove separately, brought grandparents, and learned which events could be watched afterward without making anybody feel forgotten. The kids showed up for each other too. Seeing Connor in the stands for Luna, or Victor finding his sisters after a performance, meant as much to me as any individual accomplishment.

I was proud of all six of them. Their accomplishments gave us things to celebrate, but I found myself caring just as much about how they treated people, whether they could admit when they were wrong, and whether they still came to us when something hurt. They did.

Sometimes they came to me. Sometimes one of their mothers. Occasionally, they started with an aunt, uncle, or grandparent and found their way to us afterward. I learned to be grateful that they had so many places to turn instead of needing to be the first person who knew everything.

There were losses along the way too. We said goodbye to Lady years ago, and I cried harder than I expected to. She had been part of the family before any of the children arrived and had tolerated their presence with a patience she had rarely extended to us. For a long time afterward, I still glanced toward the door when I came home, expecting her to be waiting.

The kids remembered her differently depending on how old they had been. We had enough photographs that the younger ones borrowed some of the older ones' memories. I liked that she remained part of the stories we told.

She wasn't our last dog. Eventually, another set of paws started following us through the house, and over the years there were more beds to step around, more leashes hanging by the door, and more animals becoming convinced they belonged wherever we happened to be sitting. The children grew up with dogs to love, take care of, and occasionally blame for something the dog had clearly not done.

Through all of it, there were Kat and Cassie. We knew early that the marriage we wanted couldn't look traditional. Kat and I already had the legal piece, but that had never fully described the family the three of us were making. We wanted a day when we could stand together, say what we meant, and let the people closest to us witness it.

So, we had a binding ceremony. It was smaller than our wedding had been, more private, and just as important to me. Our closest family and friends were there. We exchanged promises with a much clearer understanding of what keeping them might ask of us. By then, loving each other already included exhausted mornings, difficult conversations, children, work, and all the ordinary choices that never appear in wedding pictures.

I remember looking at both of them and feeling the same disbelief I had felt so many times before. They knew me. They knew the frightened parts, the stubborn parts, and the habits I had spent years trying to improve. They were choosing me with all of that information. I chose them too. The rings mattered. So did the ceremony. But afterward, we went home and kept doing what had made those promises possible.

We had difficult years. There were conversations we handled badly, stretches when work took more than it should, and times when being needed by so many people left one of us feeling like there was very little of ourselves remaining. Three people in a relationship gave us more support. It also gave us more feelings, more needs, and more opportunities to misunderstand something while tired.

We learned to apologize more directly. We learned that somebody being quiet didn't always mean they wanted space, and that being willing to help didn't excuse waiting to be asked every time. We kept making time to be together, all three of us and in pairs, even when arranging it felt more complicated than the evening itself. I still loved taking them out.

I also loved finding them in the kitchen after everyone else had gone to bed, sharing something one of them had saved from dinner. I loved the hand that reached for me as I walked past, the familiar weight of somebody leaning against me, and how easily a kiss could still make me forget why I had come into the room.

They had changed over the years. So had I. There was silver in my hair now, and my knee had become considerably more opinionated about the weather. Their bodies had carried our children, recovered, aged, and kept being the bodies of the women I wanted to touch. I had never stopped wanting them.

Sometimes Kat still caught me staring. Sometimes Cassie noticed first and made certain I knew she had. After all those years, both of them could still make me feel like I needed to get closer. I did, as often as they would let me.

Our house is quieter now than it used to be. The children have their own lives, places they need to be, and plans that occasionally surprise us. We still get calls for advice. We also get calls that begin with a question about something unimportant and eventually become whatever they actually wanted to tell us. I try to recognize those. Luckily, our kids in college still come home on breaks, as will Tre once he heads off to college in the fall. Our house is still "the party house." The house where the kids want to hang out. It's both a blessing and a curse.

We still have crowded dinners. There are more people around the table sometimes, and I have apparently learned nothing about preparing a reasonable amount of food. I watch the kids interrupt each other, listen to their mothers trying to finish a story, and occasionally catch Cassie looking around the room with an expression I recognize. I know what she's seeing because I see it too.

I once worried that wanting to be a good father wouldn't be enough to teach me how. I was right about that much. Wanting it was only the beginning. The rest came from paying attention, asking for help, getting things wrong, and coming back willing to do better.

I wish I could give the younger version of me a few minutes in this house. Let him hear his children laughing. Let him watch one of them come looking for him when something mattered. Let him see Kat and Cassie close beside him, still there after all the years he hadn't known how to imagine.

He would probably cry. I still do tear up sometimes. Most evenings, though, we simply turn off the downstairs lights and go to bed. Kat reaches for me. Cassie settles close. Somebody remembers one more thing they meant to tell us, and we lie there talking longer than we intended.

There was a time when I thought being loved like that had to be temporary, something I could lose if I wasn't careful enough or useful enough to deserve it. Twenty-two years, six children, and a whole life later, I finally know how to let myself rest in it. I get into bed beside the women I love, feel them move closer, and reach for them.

After all these years, I'm still so fucking glad I walked into that bookstore.