Kinkmaster Ssn. 01 Ep. 02 Pt. 02

This is a parody of a popular UK television show. It is written as a narrative for the show. It is not that heavy on actual sex stuff. (There is, just not a lot.) But it would feature a few things that allude to it.

The show is separated into

1. Studio Part, where they discuss the performance of specific missions.

2. Filmed Part, where they do specific missions.

~~~~~ short divider is used to denote transition between different Filmed parts.

~~~~~~~~~~ long divider is used to denote transition between Studio Part and Filmed parts.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Geoff said, "Welcome back to Kinkmaster! Before the break, we have the first team task where our teams have to release a bondaged woman one way or another."

Ana said, "Well let's see how the other team got on, it's Simone, Carol and Ryu."

~~~~~~~~~~

The three of them looked very confused by all these, does not seem like any of them know anything about the first thing of puzzle solving.

But Simone found something, the Rubik's cube.

"Oh, a Rubik's cube!. I love these, I used to just do these all day long!" She said, as she started solving it.

The other two didn't even bother with looking for other clues, they just stood there, looking at Simone doing her thing, they secretly hoped she could just solve everything for them. But Simone didn't seem that quick, even given what she said about her experience with it. She got there at the end though, which proved that she knew the way, just not quick.

As Simone solved the Rubik's Cube, Ana handed them a piece of note, with the number 39715 on it. They used it to unlock the nipple-to-ball-gag lock, freeing her mouth open. Ryu took the blindfold off as well but she just threw it away, and didn't even look at the other side of it.

Carol asked Malin, "Do you know anything that you can tell us? Maybe the rest of the combination?"

She just shook her head. Not saying a word.

Ryu is fascinated by the cage in front of her, she has never seen such a bondage device let alone one with a participant in it. She is paying a lot of attention to it, and that's when she finds out that on each of the four chains, there is one piece that is in the shape of a number. On each chain, the number pieces are at different positions relative to the length of it, and it reads 2-0-2-3, from the right order.

Ryu tried this on the 4-digit lock, and it worked! The cage is now opened from the right side door. Now only the 3-digit handcuff lock is left.

Carol felt like she had to contribute in some way now, but she didn't have a clue at all, she looked at the board for the first time. She thought that at least this is a 3 digit thing, so she just focused on finding 3-digit numbers in the clues.

There are many many numbers that are 3 digits; The page number of that academic paper is on page 176, the price for that train journey in euro is 35.8 euros, the number shown on that calculator is 264. And Carol tried all of it, but to no avail.

Simone noticed something. On the corkboard where all the clues are on, there are some stripes drawn on the side of its frame. She counted it and it's 3 stripes, followed by a gap, then 9 stripes, 7 stripes and so on, matching the number of the first clue. And she got around to the other side, and saw 2 stripes, a large gap, then 2 stripes then 3. So she knew she was on to something.

She ducks down to see but there are no stripes underneath it, she climbs up the table and sees the top, and there it is, 4 stripes and 8 stripes drawn on the middle and the right side of the board, but no stripes on the left.

So she said, "Try 0-4-8". Carol followed and set that number on the lock, and it worked.

She released the handcuff, and helped Malin out of the cage. "I've stopped the clock," said Ana. "Thank you," said Malin, not particularly gracious.

"Thank you!" said Simone, as she left the room so nonchalantly. Followed by Ryu who didn't say anything. Carol was left standing there, just sort of shell shocked. She looked at Malin who just stood and did not show any particular emotion.

~~~~~~~~~~

"Carol!" said Geoff.

"Yes," replied Carol.

"How did you feel about that particular task?"

"Well, I felt absolutely rubbish. Like why did I sign up for this?"

"I honestly wouldn't blame ya, the thing that this nerd does, I wouldn't have a clue." said Geoff, while playing with Ana's Chin with his finger.

"Is there many other ways you said" ask Simon, curiously.

"There was, but I won't bore you with all the details, but for example, the hairpin acts as a reset button if you just use it on any of the locks, it will just release them. There is a blacklight underneath the table, and if you use it on her corset it will also tell you the code. So again, no intercourse or other sexual activity are necessarily required." said Ana.

Geoff then asked, "Alright, let's score them, what is their time?"

Ana flicked through somethings in her tablet and then said, "There is not much in it, the team of 2 got there in 20 minutes 13, whereas the team of 3 got there in 18 minutes 35."

Geoff said, "So less than 2 minutes in it. Well then let's be fairer on this occasion, the team of 2 gets 2 points, and the team of 3 gets 3." Audience claps.

"So can we have one more of those tasks please?"

"Yes and this time it is a wordy one."

~~~~~~~~~~~~

This is presumably back to a solo task as we see the players walking into the living room area that got decorated like a nursery, but each on their own.

There is a "Babyproofed" fenced area with some plastic mat on the floor that shows the 26 alphabet on it. There is a "?" in between M and N. The mats are placed in a 3x9 placement.

We first see Simon walking in, and Ana handed him two plastic balls. Ones that are suitable for toddlers to play with. "Please roll the balls into this area, they must bounce off the fences at least once each."

Simon did, the balls rolled quite fast at first and hit the fences, but the mat is the slightly lumpy and soft type that makes the rolling slow down quickly after the bounce off the fence. And the ball landed on the N and the X.

~~~~~

Similarly, the other rolls the balls, most just rolled them together, but Xenia is the only one that rolled them one by one, more cautious than the other.

Axel got D and T. Carol's both landed on F, Ryu's landed on a Y and a?, and Xenia's landed on a C and an H.

~~~~~

"Please write down 3 words each starting with your letters. You have 2 minutes, your time starts now." Said Ana to Simon, handing him a marker with a whiteboard.

~~~~~

"So you got a wildcard, Ryu, that means you can have any 3 words with any initial, or even numbers or emojis, punctuation mark, it's totally up to you." she said to Ryu.

~~~~~

Next shot we see Carol trying to come up with 6 words that start with F.

"Fuck. That's a must." So she wrote down Fuck. "Um, I don't know. Fucking?"

Ana said, "Ok? You want to have 'Fuck' and 'Fucking'?"

"Is it Okay?" asked Carol.

"Yeah, if you want." replied Ana.

~~~~~

"Um....... X! That's a hard one, Xylophone? " said Simon.

On the board, we can see he already got the 3 'N' words, Nonchalant, Negroni and Neoclassical.

"Xi? The Greek letter? And........ Xmas! Done"

~~~~~

Axel went for Dirty, Dusting and Dog for D. And Tame, Therapy and Tie for T.

Quite apt for a pornstar, and some audiences already think this will work in his favor in the "Owwww...." they murmur.

~~~~~

Xenia has gone for Chatty, Charm and Cute for C and Hot, Hesitant and Hiccup for H.

Even though she knew this was going to be a sex thing for later, she still couldn't put herself through using any very rude words. 'Hot' may be her limit.

~~~~~

Ryu also got the Y words out of the way first, she got Yes, Yoyo and Yakitori (Chicken-skewer in Japanese).

She contemplated for a while and then just put Wholesome, Shibari and just went for a question mark "?" at the end.

~~~~~

Carol is still struggling, the nerve got to her, "10 seconds left" announced Ana. In a panic. She finished with Four, Fat, Fan and Fire.

~~~~~

"Right, Simon, would you now go to the bedroom for your task there, please."

"Right away," said Simon.

~~~~~

"Ooooh the bedroom", said Axel, as he exited the room.

We've seen the living room, the kitchen, the bathroom, even the backyard / golf court. This is the first time we enter the bedroom, where all the sex happens for most of the common people.

~~~~~

Xenia is the first to open the bedroom door, and 4 individuals are standing there dressed in butler, cook, gardener and maid outfits. They were familiar faces as well. They were Ollie, Linda, Des and Petra from the previous episode, they are all performers or escorts from Geoff's Agency.

There is a task on the bed and Xenia went to grab it then read it.

"Choose one word each from each of the lists you created, and invent a new sex act named after the combination of the two words, best act wins. You can instruct the house cast to help. You have 15 minutes. Your times start now."

~~~~~~~~~

"I for once am genuinely excited about this task! I'm intrigued about what we'll get, would we get a Neoclassical Xylophone? A Tied Dog or a Fucking Fuck?" Geoff said, not containing his laughter, which is quite contagious, making the audience laugh as well.

"Or just 'Yes?' That could be one." Ana said, pointing at Ryu. The laughter continued.

"Well, let's crack on. Who do we see first Ana?" said Geoff, finally containing the laughter.

"This is all 5 of them, the process of them preparing for the task AND the final result. It's a montage!"

~~~~~~~~~~

At first, there was a montage of them trying to instruct the performers into different positions and different levels of undress.

Axel and Carol were quite into it as this is right in their wheelhouse. Asking the performers to do it. At one point Axel asks, "Can I be in it myself?"

And Ana said, "You can do whatever you want. All the....."

Axel finished it for her, "All the information is in the task. Right I got ya."

~~~~~

A bit of a deja Vu, Ryu is tying up Linda again.

~~~~~

Simon asks them to all lie down on the bed at first. And said, "Maybe I can hit them with a vibrator or something, to call it a Neoclassical Xylophone." and look at Ana.

"We have a vibrator, yes?" reply Ana.

~~~~~

Xenia is the only one who kept all of them clothed in this montage. She did try to put them in various positions though. But remained quite awkward throughout.

~~~~~

First to finish is Carol. All four of the house cast members are standing up, they took the bedsheet and held it up. She has cut some round holes across at their crotch area, revealing their genitals. They stand alternatively by their gender.

She has now taken off her skirt and lie on the bed, facing the four genitals, and said, "So have them line up like this, so one dick goes in your snatch.... (As she inserts Ollie's dick into her vagina), you finger them like this, (As she places a hand on each vagina, one at her chest and one just on the far side) and you pop the last dick in your mouth like that. (As she just sucked Des' dick a little.)"

Ana asked, "Okay, and what do you call this?"

Carol said, "Duh? The Fuck Four?"

~~~~~

In the next scene, Ana is sitting on one chair, while on the opposite, we find a Chaise Lounge, which the statuesque Russian girl Petra is lying on.

Petra is buck naked, safe for her blue pantie. "I don't know Doctor, what does it mean if I just dream about being covered in cum all the time?" she said with the russian accent, as if she is reading from a script. Well, she is reading from a script that Axel has just devised 5 minutes ago. Or is she?

Ana said, "Well, according to Freud, it just means that is what you want, and I can help you, Boys?" Ana shouted. And Axel, Des and Ollie, along with some other guys, presumably the male members from the filming crew, walk in the room stroking their dicks.

"Let's satisfy her dream! Boys! " announced the therapist Ana. And the 7 guys started unloading their thick cum all over Petra's face and body, the 12 big loads painted Petra even whiter than her skin already was.

"Oh! It felt so good! Thank you doctor!" Petra said as she massages the cum on her face and boobs, still in that preposterous reading tone.

The camera than pan to Axel, and said, "And that's a Dirty Therapy"

~~~~~

Ryu went to the bathroom area from the previous body-fluid task. Where there is a pulley wheel. She has now placed the naked, tied-up Linda on the pulley wheel. At the bottom of that, Des is lying down naked and with a hard-on. She herself is standing on top of the ladder.

The disclaimer: "Our performers have been through professional training and many safety measures were put in place for these performances. The audience should not try to imitate any of these acts for your own safety. Our production team would not bear any responsibility for any injury if you ignore this warning." is displayed on the bottom of the screen.

"Ready? Now let go!" Ryu exclaimed, as Ana pressed a button on a rope rolling machine, but releasing Linda downwards and as she descended, her genital fit right onto Des', Sort of, he still had to adjust a bit to penetrate her. He embraced her for a bit of kissing and gently moving inside her. Before Ryu said, "Now pull her up!" And they pulled her upwards.

Standing on top of the ladder, Ryu took out a dildo and start fucking Linda's ass with it. We can hear her moan rather painfully but also pleasurably.

After a while, at Ryu's command, Linda is returned to Desmond's embrace, they started the more loving way of fucking. And then 10 seconds later, back to the mid-air dildo action. This repeated for another round.

Ryu looked at the camera, and said, "You got the gist, this is the Shibari Yoyo."

~~~~~

Xenia has got Ollie and Petra naked but with their underpants on, they are in a sixty-nine position, but they are not performing oral sex on each other. Instead, they are chatting to each other.

Petra, "So, what do you do other than this?"

Ollie, "Oh you know, I model."

Petra, "You model huh, like magazines and stuff?"

Ollie, "Mostly just like bondage or gay stuff for porn-mags."

.......

This goes on for a while. And Xenia walked into the shot and said...."This is the Hesitant Chatter?" She said it with a lot of hesitation.

~~~~~

Finally it's Simon.

He got Desmond standing in with his leg wide open, holding Petra upside down, her leg wide open but upwards. She bent her neck so her chin is touching her clavicle and she is facing upwards. His penis in his vagina, he slowly grinds into her.

The caution is displayed again on the bottom of the screen.

Simon is holding a Negroni and feeding it to Desmond, and Desmond held it in his mouth, before slurping it down his chest, abs, the coital area, Petra's tummy, cleavage and her chin then her mouth.

Simon looked at the camera and said, "Now this is the Xi-Negroni."

The A Red Font with the word "Xi" is now overlayed on top of the screen, almost completely covering Des and Petras' legs, which is in an X shape, and a i that covers up Simon.

~~~~~~~~~~

A huge round of applause is occurring in the studio. Geoff then motioned them to stop, he said, "A lot to unpack there, first, Carol, talked me through your process"

She replied, "It's Fuck Four. it's like Connect-Four but with fucking involved."

"Oh...!" The audience and Geoff had the same reaction at the same time.

"No one got that?" Carol sounded confused.

"No, sorry, that sounded more like 'Fab Four' than 'Connect Four'. Now that makes sense", said Geoff. "Well, sort of."

"Well, you know I wouldn't mind doing it to them, if they were still here." said Carol, sultrily.

"It is one of the best things you've done on this show so far Carol, that's great." Geoff said, before moving swiftly onto Axel, "Axel, the Dirty Therapy, that is very hot, but I'm sorry I'm pretty sure I have seen this in one of your movies before."

"Well, in my career, I pretty much have done everything, so I wouldn't know if I have done it or not! It's hard for me to come up with something entirely new!" said Axel.

"No but you see, these three have came up with something new! Even the virgin!" He pointed to the three remaining members on the other side of the row.

"Xenia, was it a good task for you?" Ask Geoff.

Xenia rolled her eyes at him, and said sarcastically, "Haha, yes, the virgin, couldn't even come up with a sex act with sex in it. Make fun of me."

Geoff said, "No, at least it was funny, some people laughed during that and that is important."

Carol interrupted and said, "I'm sorry Xenia, sorry, but didn't she take the word Chatty? But now her thing is called Hesitant Chatter?"

Ana said, "We've decided that as long as the basic meaning is there, we'll allow conjugation of the word form."

Carol yelled, "And you let me just picked both 'Fuck' and 'Fucking'!?" at Ana. She seemed genuinely mad. Much to the audience and Ana's amusement.

"Carol, if it helps." Geoff chirped in, "She's getting 1 point. (Gesture to Xenia)" In which Carol responds by doing the "I'll back-off" gesture, But to the dismay of Xenia, who is doing her cute pouting again.

"Ryu, I think that was a great invention, the Shibori? Shibori yoyo?"

"No, you dumbass, Shibori is "to squeeze", ShiBAri is "to tie up". This is Shibari Yoyo, and it's not the best thing! They turned down my idea of having two people on either side, the woman has to either suck a dick or kiss based on their position."

Ana said, "Yeah the pulley wheel does not support the weight of more than one person."

Ryu continued, "So I had to settle for this one. Where she is also yoyo-ed between the sort of romantic love-making to the harsh bondage stuff."

Geoff said, "I think it is great. This would be better than what you said about the 2 people idea, so you should thank health and safety for this one."

Ryu gave him an unsatisfied look.

Geoff said, "And finally Simon, I thought that was a bit dumb at first, but then when the "Xi" came in I thought that was genius, and the liquid rolling down from one mouth all the way to another, that's quite erotic and strangely classy."

Simon said, "Thank god for the health and safety let me have that one. And it came quite late as well, and of course, thanks Desmond and Petra for being so brilliant!"

Geoff said, "Yes, we must also thank the performers for their brilliant work." The audience claps. Geoff continued, "And if you want to do any of these kinky things with them, you can, go and visit our website. Anyway, I'm ready to score them."

Ana, "Let's hear it."

Geoff, "So although it is funny, it is a shit sex act. 1 point to Xenia. Axel's hot but not entirely new, 2 point; 4 points to both Carol and Simon, who added new elements to some classics; Ryu played this to her strength, and it was the most creative one, 5 points to Ryu Fukumi."

The audience claps.

"Can we have a scoreboard update please Ana?"

Ana replied, while doing her magic with the tablet, "Well let's have a series update, having won all 3 of the tasks today, she is leading in this episode and the series at the moment. Ryu Fukumi with 31 points, then Simon 27, Carol 26, Axel 20 and Xenia is at the back of the line with 19 points."

Geoff, "I think it's time for another of those breaks? Think about what you want in life, is it to have sex with the lady or man of your dream? Or is it just to pay for it because we provide these services? Whatever it is, you have around 2 minutes to do that before we come back to this outrageous sex show. See you after the break."

(End of part 2)